Authors: Jenna Harte
The door behind her flew open again. "Jack, I got that – oh hey Tess," Brad said as he walked into the office. His head bobbled back and forth as he assessed what he'd walked into. "I'm interrupting."
"No," Jack said. "Tess brought the files. Can you escort her down and get them from her car?"
It was a dismissal. Not only that, but he was having her thrown out by the man who'd also once thrown her out of town. The pain of it nearly brought her to her knees. She knew she'd hurt him, but wouldn't have expected such cruelty. Not from him.
Brad looked to Tess, his eyes asking her to try harder. She nearly laughed. She was fighting for her life and Brad's office.
She couldn't decide what to say. She'd said she was sorry. She said she love him. What else could she say? All she had left was the chocolate. Perhaps it would detract from the fool she'd made of herself through her clothes. She reached into her purse and pulled out the container.
"It's not Scharffen Berger, but I think you'll like it." Would he remember how he used chocolate to smooth things over with her? His infraction wasn't as bad as hers, but surely she deserved another chance. "I was afraid. I thought I wanted what I'd built for myself. But you changed that. I didn't realize it until it was too late. Now I see how I lost myself because of fear. I don't want that anymore. I want a chance to show you that I can be the person I was three years ago when you first loved me."
"Three years ago?" Brad asked with surprise. "Did you-"
"Shut up, Brad," Tess said. Then turning back to Jack, she continued. "I didn't tell you I loved you the other night not because I didn't feel it, but because I was overwhelmed by it."
"Oh, well, there, Jack. Come on, forgive her, kiss and make up, and let me make you rich," Brad said.
"Shut up, Brad." Jack came around his desk, leaving the container of chocolate where she'd set it.
"I'm not giving up," Tess said as she watched him put his coat on. "I can be persistent too." Although the tight jeans and shirt with kick ass shoes didn't seem to be very persuasive at the moment.
"Why would I allow myself to risk this again?" he said to her. "I now see the appeal of your safe world."
"Is it dead then?" She was very near losing it. She could feel her chest compressing from the pain and the desperate need to beg. "Is it possible to kill love in an instant?"
He was standing so close, towering over her. His features turned to pain. "If only it were." He gave her one last look and then walked out of the office.
Tess sank into the nearest chair. She felt shaky as if she'd just come through a traumatic situation, except the trauma continued on and on. She heard Brad move, but was thankful he didn't say anything. A moment later he was in front of her with a bottle of water.
"I've got stronger stuff if you need it," he said.
She took the water, but didn't drink. "I guess I should get those files."
He leaned against the desk, crossing his ankles as they stretched out. "We can wait a few minutes."
"If he comes back and I'm here, he'll be angry."
"I don't think so. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he came back to make sure you are still here."
Tess looked up at Brad unable to follow his meaning.
"The reason he rushed out was because he was precariously close to forgiving you."
"That doesn't make sense."
Brad laughed. "He's not ready to forgive you. Or he wants to you feel his pain. I don't know because I'm too shallow to understand these things. But I do know a man's got pride. And I also know that eventually he'll be back."
"I don't think so. His exit seemed final."
"It seemed that way because he's hurt. He's hurt because he still loves you. If he didn't care, he would have been indifferent to you."
She supposed that could be true, but it didn't change the fact that Jack had said he wasn't going to risk his heart. She stood. "I'll get the files."
Brad escorted her to the elevator. "I admire you,” he said as the elevator doors closed.
Tess remained quiet.
“People like you and I who have been rejected all our lives, we don’t usually set ourselves up to be crapped on. Yet there you were in Jack’s office doing just that."
She cast a glance his way. "This time I deserved it."
"Yeah, you did. A little anyway. But he'll come around."
"I didn't know he could be like that."
"You should have seen him when his mom died."
The reminder of her abandoning him when he lost his mother only served to make her feel even less deserving of Jack.
"But he's naturally an optimist and likes to live life full force. He'll lick his wounds and then he'll be back."
Tess wasn't going to hold her breath.
"What did you mean about three years ago?" Brad asked.
"We didn't cheat on you if that's what you're asking."
"But I was right about Jack having a thing for you back then?"
"That's what he said."
They continued down the elevator in silence for a few floors.
"We got along pretty well for a while don't you think?" he finally asked making eye contact with her through the reflection of the elevator doors. "We had some fun times."
She nodded. "We had a few."
"When we got engaged, we agreed that it was because we had lots of fun together, which already put us ahead of our parents."
"Yes."
"So maybe we could still try it."
"Try what?" Tess asked hoping she was misunderstanding him.
"Marriage."
She turned and gapped at him. "Brad, you don’t like women. And I thought you weren't going to hide who you are."
"Imagine us together though. We'd have fun. We could start our own law practice. And we'd both be on the same page when it came to the idea that true love doesn't exist."
"It’s a nice offer, Brad, but I'll pass."
"Probably just as well. Jack would kick my ass. Do you think you could not tell him about this part of our conversation?"
If she ever had the chance to speak to Jack again, Tess was sure she wouldn't mention Brad's crazy proposal.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Tess walked through her front door longing to feel the comfort of the home. But as she stood in the entryway there was no sense of comfort. It was his fault, of course. A week ago everything about her home and life was just as she'd wanted. There was no clutter, no sentimental reminders of a life left behind, and as she discovered, no life either. Jack had been right about that. Her neatly constructed life was ordered and satisfactory, but lacking warmth and vitality. She wouldn't have noticed had he not come back into her life. Now she saw her home as he had that first day; stark and lifeless.
He'd been right, but she'd been too late in acknowledging it and now she was alone and aware that her life was an empty shell. Before he'd shown up she'd been alone, but hadn't felt lonely. Now she felt as alone as she imagined anyone could feel. Not that she didn't have people to call on, but unlike her, they had real lives. Regina had her children. Helen, Tom and Daniel had each other. Even Kate had another group of gal pals.
Not that she'd given up on Jack. She'd told him she could be as tenacious as he was. She could work on him just as he'd worked on her. He'd loved her once. She would hold on to that. Brad had to be right that Jack's level of hurt and his need to hurt her back was a reflection of how deep his feelings were for her. And maybe he was right about one more thing. Maybe Jack would change his mind. Have a change of heart and give her another chance.
In the meantime though she was home feeling cold and lonely. Perhaps she should get a real pet. She'd heard they did wonders for people who were alone a lot. She scanned the room for Buster's bowl and then remembered that she'd lent him to her neighbor's son for his pet show-and-tell at school. She truly was alone.
Not wanting to wallow, she considered going to bed. When her phone rang, she jumped, but was grateful for the distraction. She told herself it wouldn't be him even if deep down she hoped it was.
"Hey Tess," Kate said on the other end of the line. "I'm sorry I didn't call back sooner."
It took Tess a moment to remember why Kate would be calling her back. The article.
"Listen, I didn't know anything about that piece of crap being published. If I did I would have warned you, you know that right?"
Tess nodded and then realized Kate couldn't see her. "Yes. I was just curious why someone would be following us that closely?"
"Are you kidding me? On most days the big story around here is about a proposed road change. Now we've got murder, the most eligible bachelor in the world, and a romance. That stuff sells."
"It's not news." Tess sank to her couch.
"No. Unfortunately, news is becoming too much like entertainment instead of information. So is your Valentine angry too? I'd love to see him take on that sniveling muck rucking B.J. Brown."
"No. Would you know if someone told B.J. where we were or is he just a news stalker."
"He's definitely a stalker, but I hunted him down after I got your message. He gave me that 'I can't reveal my sources' line, but by the time I was done with him, he told me it was Shelby Worthington who called him. She said you were on a date with the guy suspected of killing your boyfriend's uncle. Real soap opera sounding stuff, huh?"
"Shelby?" Tess wondered when Shelby would have called him. And why? Tess thought back to the conversation they had in the bathroom at Tolivers.
"Yes. Why would she want to set you up like that?"
"I'm not sure," Tess said. "I think maybe she didn't like my insinuating her husband was covering up for her."
"Really?" Tess could hear the reporter in Kate's voice.
"I can't go into details without compromising my -"
"Yeah, I know," Kate mumbled. "Attorney-client privilege."
"But, you could try asking the police about it."
"I could. So I still get a story when this is done, right?"
Tess hadn't wanted to go into details about her relationship with Jack. It was still too raw to talk about without losing control and falling into a hysterical weeping mess. On the other hand, she needed a friend.
"There is no story. Not anymore," Tess said telling Kate about her break-up with Jack and how he dismissed her when she tried to make amends.
"He did that?" Kate asked when Tess finished her story.
"I can't blame him. I hurt him."
"Do you want me to come over?"
"No. I'm going to bed."
"Are you sure? I could bring a boatload of Ben and Jerry's New York Superfudge Chunk."
"I’m sure. Thank you though."
"Well then maybe you'd want to come to my annual Single's Valentine Party tomorrow. We're having it at Toliver's. Since you're single again, it might be fun to commiserate with your single sisters. Unless you're back with Daniel."
"I was never with Daniel," Tess said by rote. "I'll think about tomorrow." Tess was certain she wouldn't be up to a party especially a female pity party. She wondered if she'd even be able to get out of bed in the morning.
"Alright. Call me if you need anything. Call any time."
Tess could hear genuine concern from her friend. "I will. Thank you Kate."
~~~~
Tess didn't feel as alone after the call, but still couldn't manage any more effort than it took to go to bed. She checked her back door and started turning out the lights when there was a knock on her door. He heart jumped to her throat. Brad had been right. He came back.
She swung the door open ready to jump into Jack's arms, except it wasn't Jack. "Daniel."
"Can I come in?"
"Is it personal or professional?"
He sighed. "Personal."
"Are you going to call me names?"
"No." He shook his head as if we were as weary about the state of things as she was. She pulled open the door so he could enter. She didn't want him to stay long or get too cozy so she didn't offer him a drink.
"Things have gone too far," he said after she'd shut the door. "I don't like what this has done to us."
"Would you be here now if I hadn't ended things with Jack?" she asked not hiding the accusation in her tone.
He stiffened. "I doubt he'd let me near you."
"That's where you're wrong!" He flinched at her outburst. "During all this, he never once asked me to stay away from you. Not once." She was pleased at the look of guilt that crossed his face.
"I'm sorry Tess."
"What if I told you I went to see him today, begged him to forgive me? Would you still be sorry?"
"Yes," he said on an exasperated breath. "I'm not sorry for how I feel about him. I still have concerns. What I'm sorry about is what has happened between us."
Tess wasn't sure she could believe him. It was easy now to say all the right things when the situation was more to his liking. She wondered if he'd heard about Sarah's visit and what he'd think about her involvement in that.
"I can't spend my life picking and choosing my clients or my relationships based on what you want."
"I know that. Can't you give me a break? I didn't mean the things I said to you."
"You said them to your mother!"
"I know, I know." He ran a hand through his hair. "It was wrong."
"Daniel, I know he didn't kill Asa. Why are you unable to consider that someone else did."
He bit his lip as if he were holding back a comment he knew she wouldn't like.
"Now that he's dead, everyone seems to forget how disagreeable and mean Asa was, or that there were many people who didn't like him. Including you," she added.
"Now you're accusing me of killing him?"
"No. But you and many others had as much motive and opportunity to kill him as Jack did."
"Except that I didn't steal his computer or fight with him."
"No. Your dad stole his computer. And yes you did fight with him. I don't know what about, but when you two were together, your dislike of him was noticeable."
Daniel's jaw tensed. But he didn't deny that Tom took the computer, which meant the computer found at the fire was proven to be Asa's or there was a very strong suspicion. "He and I disagreed over some things, but I didn't hate him or want him dead."