Defenseless (33 page)

The temptation to rip my arms away is great, but I can’t reopen my stitches. “Let. Me. Go.” I enunciate each word. “Now.”

He releases me, and I turn my back to him. I need to calm myself. He’s still processing everything, just like I am.

Mark makes a sound that stops my heart. I whirl as he tries to stand. Agony is splayed across his face. I rush to his side, slide my shoulder beneath his, and take some of his weight. “I can do this,” he grits out from between clenched teeth. “I made it through that hell. I can walk.”

I want to slap him. “Don’t be stubborn. Lean on me. We have to lean on each other.” My words mean so much more now.

Mark nods, and I help him lift up and balance. His legs are shaky, but for the most part, he holds himself steady. He’s stronger than any man I’ve ever met.

I step in front of him, and his hand lifts to my cheek. “I love you, and I’m sorry.”

“It’s a lot.”

“We’ll find our way.” His words reassure me that he’s in it.

Not that I’m sure why I doubted him. Mark has proven more than anyone else just how much I mean to him.

“Charlie . . .” His voice is thick with emotion. “I need to kiss you, and I’m going to. I don’t care how much it hurts. I don’t care if my lip busts open. I’m going to kiss you because you’re worth the pain. I’m going to kiss you because you’re having our baby. And I’m going to kiss you because it’s all I can do.”

I smile, step closer so he can wrap his arm around me, and rest my hand gently on his chest. “I’m going to let you kiss me because it’s been too long. I’m going to kiss you back because you’re alive, and then you’re going to get back in bed so you can heal.”

“Bossy.”

“You ain’t seen the half of it.”

He smirks. “I like bossy, and as soon as I’m better, I’m going to fuck you until we can’t see straight. Now, kiss me.”

“Romantic. Now who’s the bossy one?”

“Shut up, Charlie. Kiss me.” His head dips lower. I rise on my toes to shorten the distance.

When our lips touch, my world centers. Everything feels—right. We’re okay. I have him, and he has me. Together we have this new life. Something we did out of love, even if we didn’t realize it. Even though I never wanted this, it’s everything to me. His hands leave my face as he breaks the kiss. Mark shifts back slightly and presses his hand on my stomach.

“Just us.”

My fingers touch the side of his face. “Next time someone says to leave somewhere, you should listen.”

“Not if I think you are in danger. I will never leave you behind, Charlie. I’ll bash through walls, take beatings, and give my life for you. That’s love. That’s how much you mean to me. Don’t you get it? Without you in my life . . . it’s worthless. You though,” he pauses. “You’re everything to me.”

Tears pool in my eyes, “I love you, Marcus.”

“My name isn’t Marcus.”

“Yeah, well, I owe you for the horrific names you came up with.”

He laughs, kisses the top of my head, and slowly makes his way to the bathroom. Of course, he grumbles when he notices I’m behind him. But this is how it’s going to go. I’ll be here to catch him, just like he will be for me.

“So what’s the plan?” Mark asks after his nap. He’s eating a little, and thankfully, he seems to be doing okay. It’s been eighty-six hours since I’ve heard from Mandi. I can only take that as a good sign. If things were bad, she’d have called . . . at least I tell myself that.

My old self wants to tell him nothing, but that isn’t how we operate now. Mark is my partner, and he deserves to know everything. Even if it’s bitter to admit, I need him.

“What do you remember about your time with them?”

Mark steels himself with a deep breath. “I remember every detail. He said something about a son . . .”

“We’re on that. We heard him.”

“Who’s we?”

“Mandi, Dominic, Jackson, Aaron and myself. That’s everyone I trust right now.”

Mark’s eyes narrow. “I don’t trust her.”

“I know you don’t, but she grabbed me off the train. She knew I was being tailed, so she took care of them and secured me. If it weren’t for her, I don’t know if I would’ve been able to hide.” Mandi incapacitated two people and mixed up communications in the area so I could get to my safe house. She uncovered where Mark was, as well. Her loyalty is not to be questioned. I would’ve never made it to him without her.

“Okay, if you say so.” He sits back against the couch. He looks much better today. The swelling has gone down significantly, and it’s clear his eye won’t have any permanent damage. He is eating a very restricted diet, walking a little sturdier, and has been able to wean off the painkillers a little. Both of us are able to take a deep sigh of relief.

“Just for now, don’t worry about what’s going on. Once we have something concrete, we’ll talk.”

“Damn right we will.”

We settle in together and watch the news. There are always clues that the public misses. I await the story of the CIA Director stepping down. That will be when I relax. For now, I tuck my legs under me and curl up against Mark. He flinches but holds me so I can’t move. I just want to be close to him.

“Charlie.” Mark’s voice has an edge to it.

I glance over at him. “Yeah?”

“I’m serious about marrying you.”

“If that’s a proposal, you suck.”

“I’m giving you some time to get over whatever crap excuses you’re forming. I’m telling you it’s going to happen. I’m going to ask you, you’re going to say yes, and we’re going have a wedding.”

I shake my head and turn my attention back to the television. “When will you learn that demanding me to do something doesn’t work? Also, I’m not even sure I like you enough.”

“You love me.”

I sit with my arms crossed over my chest. “I’m not denying that. I said
like
you. You’re a pain in the ass, you’re messy, you boss me around, you argue with everything I say—”

“And you’re just as argumentative and frustrating, but it’s going to happen. You’ll get over all that crap you mentioned.”

“So you say.”

“Come here.” He opens his arms wide. I scoot over and he pulls me against his side. “I’m done with games, babe. I’m not going to live the rest of my life without you here by my side. Our lives aren’t a guarantee. So I’m going to marry you and impregnate you many more times. Also, we don’t have to pay a minister.”

I shift so I can see his face. “Oh, hell no. I’m not marrying you as my priest.”

He rolls his eyes, “I’m not a priest. I’m a reverend.”

“No, you’re a jackass.”

He smirks. “Keep it up, and I’ll tell your mother you want her to plan the wedding.”

My eyes bulge as I debate whether he’s healthy enough to endure me beating the hell out of him. “I haven’t agreed to marry you yet, and that’s so not funny.”

He leans forward. “Not joking. And you will agree when I ask you.”

Before I can say a word, a noise at the door stops us both. Neither of us breathes or moves.

Knock, knock
. Pause.
Knock, knock
.

Mandi is here.

“You’re lucky. That’s Mandi’s code.” I head to the door and check the peephole.
Thank God.

I open the door and she smiles. “It’s done.”

“Done?”

“Yeah, he’s in custody. He admitted to quite a bit, but Aaron really figured out the missing clues.”

She enters the room, and I close the door behind her. We head to the couch and Mark shifts forward.

I’m dying to know how this all went down. Being sidelined hasn’t been easy for me, but it was necessary. “What happened?” I nearly bounce in my seat. “I want all the details.”

“After I got back, Christopher refused to speak to anyone until your father’s old partner, Dean Tubb, came. He was working with Dominic to uncover some of the pieces you and I couldn’t make fit. Like the photo your dad had of the building we couldn’t place and the fact he had notes of dates and initials that you weren’t able to decipher. Turns out Dean and Gerald used a code during their early years. As soon as he saw it, Christopher’s tune changed.”

She gives me a second to let that sink in. My dad and Dean had to talk in what was almost their own language back then. The CIA wasn’t as advanced as it is now, but I never realized it could be a code. It makes sense that if my father had been suspicious of people, he’d revert to something that couldn’t be traced. How the hell did I miss that? Oh, I know. The sexy blonde next to me had my mind preoccupied. “What did the code say?”

“Well, as soon as Dean saw it,
he
knew, and wouldn’t allow anyone else to speak. He took Christopher into custody and is now the Interim Director. I still didn’t understand the connection with Mark, though. That was the part that kept confusing me, and Dean still wasn’t forthcoming with the meaning of the code.” Her eyes come alive as she grows more excited. “But Charlie, when I mentioned how you were threatened because of the file, that Mark was taken, and that there was a correlation with Cole Security Forces, it all clicked.”

“
What
clicked?” Mark snaps.

“Mazir
is
Christopher Asher!”

“What?” I’m confused.

“Don’t you see it? It was obvious. You both had to be tied to the investigation. There was a reason things got desperate once you joined Cole Security Forces. It’s the only connection between Cole Security’s stolen ammunition and you being the agent investigating Mazir, who was trading weapons.”

Mark slouches forward. “Meaning once we met, the fact that the arms dealer was an American would become clear to both of us. With both of our knowledge of the investigation, it would be easy to form conclusions.”

Mandi nods. “But he was able to keep throwing you guys off and keep you looking for someone who didn’t exist. He was able to keep you far enough away, but close enough that you kept working the case. The man is a true narcissist.”

“And he was making a ton of money, taking out spies, and keeping a high-profile job at the same time,” I muse aloud. “It really was the perfect plan. He was able to orchestrate everything from the confines of his office, line his pockets, and betray everyone he knew while we hunted a terrorist.”

“Exactly,” Mandi says. “Then he found out your father was looking into something fishy within the agency and keeping a file. Aaron was able to piece together the photo of the building. It was the site he was going to in Afghanistan where their shipment went missing.”

Mark lifts his hands. “I had no idea. I never went there or was involved in that bid. We assumed that was where your father traced Mazir to.”

My eyes drift out the window as I think it all over. All of this is Christopher’s fault. My father must have pieced it all together and threatened to expose him. So Mazir had him killed and then claimed responsibility. All the while it was done by his friend, his ally, and his boss.

“It all makes sense. Each dead end was engineered at the hands of my boss. He knew where I was, if I was getting close to pertinent information—he was behind it all. He was using all of us to get what he wanted: money, power, and control.” Every part of me wants to explode. My muscles clench as anger takes hold. “I should’ve killed him.”

“No,” Mark says. “You would’ve never figured this out. You would’ve spent the rest of your life looking for a ghost. This is all behind us now. We can move forward and find some normalcy. It’s over, Charlie.”

“Is it?” I ask. “Because regardless, people have lost their lives, you’ve suffered, I’ve suffered. Will it ever really be over? I can’t trust my own agency. I can’t go back to work there, and I can’t bring my dad back.”

Mandi shifts uncomfortably. “I think you guys need to talk. But it is all done now, Charlie. He’s locked up, Dean is in charge, and everyone we could identify who was involved has been detained. And there is no son. We’ve dug and dug; he was just messing with us. He’s a master manipulator.”

There’s no sense of ease and no feeling of accomplishment. My dad is still gone, and the agency I would’ve given my life for killed him. “I need to tell my mother who was behind my father’s death.”

She stands. “Dominic knows too. He’s waiting for your call.”

Mark gets to his feet. “I was wrong about you,” he admits to Mandi. “I thought you were involved.”

“I never betrayed her. The information I was giving was being monitored by Christopher. I didn’t know it was him, but I suspected someone in the agency was watching. Once I started piecing together that something was wrong, I stopped inputting the correct info. It’s why you guys were able to get out of the country undetected. I put a code on her file, and once it flagged me, I altered it. I was helping even if you never knew. I kept them off her back while you two were working.”

Mandi has always been loyal. She explained that she knew the agency was involved after my debrief. She was willing to destroy our friendship if it meant I lived. By having me taken off the case, put on leave, and kept out of the area, it allowed her to dig at the same time we did. Even with my cold shoulder, she was there for me.

“Thank you,” Mark says with his hand extended.

“She never gave up on you.”

“She never gave up on you, either.” He smiles.