Depths of Salvation (Love on the Edge) (16 page)

“Hi,” she said as she broke our kiss and I set her back down.

“Hey.” I grinned at her. “Miss me?”

“Isn’t that obvious?”

I shrugged.

“Glad you made it back out today. I didn’t know if you would.” The uncertainty in her eyes didn’t match her confident stance. It seemed genuine, her hope that I had meant everything I said, everything I did last night.

“Had a few things to handle on the vessel.”
Including reaffirming an agreement to help destroy your site.
Fuck my life.

She smiled and tugged on my arm. “I have a surprise for you.”

“I don’t like surprises,” I said as she pulled me across the deck.

“I figured as much, but this one you will.”

Stopping at the storage compartment where she kept all her gear, she opened the door and motioned with her head. “Take a look.”

I arched an eyebrow at her before leaning over to peek inside. “No shit?”

She bounced on her toes. “Just came in.”

“When did you order this?” I asked, my mouth watering over the brand new, top of the line, underwater welder gear before me—a dry suit, leather gloves, stinger, and diving helmet.

“The first day I met you. When you stood up for me in Henrick’s
office and bought my site more time. I wanted to thank you. You can take it with you when this is all over, but this way you won’t have to cart gear back and forth between Slade’s place and mine.”

The amount and quality of the items had to have taken a huge chunk out of her site’s budget. I couldn’t believe she’d invest in me like that. Especially since she didn’t owe me a damn thing. Not when I’d been planning to ruin her.

I crossed my arms over my chest.

“You don’t like it?” She sank onto her feet, losing the excited bounce. “Did I get the wrong kind?”

I shook my head, pinning her with my gaze. “What’s this really for?”

She tilted her head at my tone, and I flinched inside, hating the fact that I couldn’t fucking tell if she was in this for me or in this for her site.

“I’m not following,” she said.

I walked passed her, stopping when I’d gotten to the stern
of the boat and could see nothing but ocean in front of me.

“Connell?” She touched my shoulder from behind, and I turned around. “What is it?”

“I’m just trying to figure out if last night”—I nodded toward where the brand-new gear was—“and
that
is about you and me or if it’s about me saving your site.”

Sadie’s mouth popped open, and she took a step back. “Are you serious?”

I shrugged.

She ran her fingers through her hair, a wrinkle creasing between her eyebrows. “You think I’d fuck you just to save my site? Is that the type of woman you think I am?”

The sting in her voice hit every cell in my body, and I wanted to take my accusation back, but it was too late.

She pinched the bridge of her nose before taking a deep, audible breath. Shocking the hell out of me, she took a step closer to me, instead of storming off in the opposite direction. She reached up and placed a hand on my chest. “You know, I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but I can see where you would think that. This”—she moved her hand to the back of my neck—“has happened fast, and it’s not my norm, I promise you. I can’t explain it, Connell, you just . . .” She bit her bottom lip. “Fit.”

I sighed, the genuineness in her eyes undeniable. Either she was the best actress in the entire world or . . . she actually cared about me. I don’t know why it was so hard to believe, but after years of pushing everyone away, it was easier to believe the worst. Easier to think I was unlovable instead of hope for something as real as I felt with Sadie.

I bent my knees, sliding my hands around her waist and hefting her up against me. I pressed my lips to hers, claiming her mouth as she willingly opened up to me. She tasted so damn good, and felt equally delicious against me, and my mind quickly settled, quieter and clearer than when I was underwater.

This was real. This was happening.

I tangled my fingers in her hair, gently nudging her head back enough to catch her eyes. “Thank you,” I said. “For the gear. I should’ve said that instead.”

She smiled, her eyes jumping from mine to my lips. “It’s okay. I know you’re still adjusting to this whole
talking
thing.”

I shook my head. “How can you tell that?”

She trailed the tip of her tongue across my bottom lip, the motion sending heatwaves straight to my dick. If she kept it up, I’d take her right here, topside and in the open.

“Just do.”

I held her to me a little harder. “I’m not used to people
knowing
me. Let alone trying to break through.”

“I’m prepared to keep discovering, Connell. Slowly, if I have to, I’ll peel you back one layer at a time.”

“Why would you want to?” I asked, unable to understand why anyone, especially someone as incredible as Sadie, would take the time and work to get through my baggage to be with me.

She kissed me quick and hard before pulling back. “I’m in preservation. It’s in my blood to save what’s worth saving before something destroys it.”

“Nothing is going to destroy me.”

She frowned, placing her forehead against mine. “You will, if you don’t let someone in soon.”

I swallowed hard. This woman. She always cut to the quick with me, shaking up my insides so much I was useless against her. She had me, in any way she wanted, all she had to do was ask.

“Come on,” she said and wiggled in my grasp. “Let’s go for a dive. Not work, just to . . . decompress.”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “There is somewhere I’d like to take you actually.”

Her eyes lit up, and she clapped her hands together. “Perfect.” She grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the pilothouse. “Tell Liz the coordinates.”

I rattled them off, knowing the place by heart, and took Sadie’s hand as we sat down on the benches closer to the stern again. I traced the outlines of her fingers, listening to the waves crashing around the boat as Liz pushed it forward.

Sadie knew me without knowing everything, knew what I needed without me asking, and knew how to push just enough until I couldn’t take it anymore and then she’d draw back. She was perfection. Everything I never knew I wanted.

Now I had to break the contract with Slade—without jeopardizing Sadie’s career—or I’d fucking lose her forever.

Sadie

CONNELL MOVED EFFORTLESSLY
through the water a few feet ahead of me, his muscles adapting to the pressure of our depth with expert motions. He made it look graceful, like slow dancing, and my heart swelled another fraction while watching him.

He’d taken us the opposite direction of my site, to a coral reef I had yet to explore. We desperately needed a nonwork setting, because I was in knots after Connell’s outburst topside. When he’d first accused me of using him for my site, I was pissed enough to slap him. Once I took a breath and wiggled my way into his closed-off shoes, I saw things differently. How could he
not
think that was why I slept with him?

Everything had happened between us so fast, like a match touching gasoline, and we were powerless to stop the blaze. It didn’t make sense on paper, but where the flames licked the center of my chest?
That
made all the sense in the world. I just hoped he believed me, and that he’d let me in enough before he burned us both.

I gasped, giddier than the bubbles bursting around me once I set eyes on a super-pod of spinner dolphins ahead of us.

“Check it out,” Connell said, glancing over his shoulder and slowing his speed by waving his arms back and forth in the water.

“How many are there?” I asked, trying to count each beautiful silver creature. They were so playful, darting over, under, and in between each other.

“At least twenty.” He reached for my hand. “Let’s get closer.”

I took his hand and let him propel us forward. A school of tiny, iridescent fish
swam above the dolphins, their movements calm and relaxed even as we approached. The dolphins plunged lower as if racing to the sea floor, before darting back up and jumping out of the surface midspin.

Connell stopped us right in the middle of the pod, and we instantly became a part of their games. Several took to circling us in easy, lazy movements, while others leaped over our heads or flicked their tales near our faces. I couldn’t contain my grin and Connell couldn’t either, which shocked the hell out of me.

I’d never seen him smile like this before—so free and open and without any chains. I moved as close to him as possible, using my flippers to steady myself before his face, laughing as a dolphin came up and pushed his back with its long nose.

He grinned, staying steady in his position despite the creature’s attempts to throw him off balance.

“Old friend?” I asked.

He nodded. “Oh yeah, me and these guys go way back.”

“You know, I can’t tell if you’re joking or not.”

“Really?”

“Really,” I said. “It would make sense for you to have friends under the water. You spend so much time down here.”

“Like you don’t.”

“True,” I said, reaching out and grabbing his hand. “But our reasons behind it are different, I think.”

“How so?” he asked, not a hint of deflection in his tone.

Hope bloomed in my chest. Perhaps getting him underwater was the key to him letting me in, opening up to me about why he shut people out.

I shrugged, trying not to show how badly I wanted to know him on more levels than what he tasted like and how I felt in his arms. “Seems like you hide down here. I just don’t know what from.”

The easy grin he’d had on his face shifted to something sad; then a darkness washed over his eyes. He glanced to the right, his gaze staying tight on the dolphins still playing around us.

“You don’t have to tell me now, Connell.” I squeezed his hand and let it go. “When you’re ready. I just want you to know I’m not going anywhere, regardless of what it is.”

He grabbed my hand back. “You have no idea what that means to me, Sadie. I just . . . I have to do this slowly. I’m not used to . . . being intimate with anyone.”

I arched an eyebrow at him. We’d been all kinds of intimate less than twenty-four hours ago.

He shook his head and smirked. “I’m not talking about my familiarity with how you feel surrounding me. Which is fucking amazing, by the way.”

A thrill rocketed through me seeing the lust blare in his eyes. In the ocean, even with all manner of diving gear on, I still wanted to strip myself bare to him and let him have his way with me. Good Lord, this man had claimed me in every way possible and I didn’t even know how he liked his coffee.

The intensity was just shy of overwhelming and I assumed the only way to remedy that was learning more about him—what made him laugh and cry and scared—as fast as possible, but if the man needed time, I’d give it to him. He was worth every hour, day, week, month, whatever he needed. I knew that in my blood, and in the end, that was all that mattered. My instincts had never let me down before, and every cell in my body called for Connell on a level I’d never experienced before. And I damn sure didn’t want it to end because I pulled the girl card and pushed him harder than he could handle. Especially with how closed off he’d been for who knew how long. I couldn’t imagine what did that to him; I just hoped to God he’d let me share the weight with him someday.

The dolphins grew bored with us after we didn’t participate in their games and fluttered off to new adventures. They were so much more fun to watch than the sharks, naturally, though both were beautiful in their own ways. I was glad we hadn’t run into any more trouble with the Trio since the incident with Nemo, and the thought of them being close sent a cold chill up my spine.

Fear was a good, tangible thing that helped me survive in more instances than I cared to admit, but it wouldn’t keep me out of the water.

Connell tugged on our joined hands, taking me further down the reef, the red and orange coral vibrant against the blue of the water, the sun coating it in gold. We swam in silence, not awkward or weighted, but completely comfortable, and it suited us. My urge to ask questions about his life before the water took him died with each lazy stroke; each colorful fish that swam by helped erase the
need
to know and let me simply
be
with him.