Desolate (Riverband #2) (2 page)

I looked at my arms as I laid back on the bed and pulled up my shirt to look at my side that was hurting. My side was covered with bruises. I pulled my shirt back down and played with my charm bracelet. It was the only thing I had left of Havock. I closed my eyes and thought about him. His kiss. . .his touch. I smiled softly as tears fell down my cheeks as I remembered us making love. I needed him. I heard whispers and opened my eyes to see the shadows there. I rolled over onto my good side and covered my head with the pillows. I hummed loudly trying to drown them out.  Havock was the only one who could keep the shadows away. The only one that ever made me feel safe.

HAVOCK

"You're going to school," my mom demanded as she yanked my covers off.

I pulled the covers back on. "No."

"You've missed six days straight already! If you miss any more you won't-”

I sat up. "Graduate?! Who gives a shit?"

"Look, we are all sad! We all miss her! But that doesn't give you the right to give up on the other things that matter! And you watch how you speak to me!"

I scoffed. "Nothing matters without her." I cut my eyes at mom.

"Havock, you're going even if Garrett and your father have to escort you there themselves. I can even call the police to take you."

I laughed coldly. "I'd like to see them try."

She sighed heavily and walked out.

I laid back down and covered up.

Ten minutes later, I was being yanked out of bed, a shirt thrown over my head and dad and Garrett demanding I put on the jeans dad was holding in his hands.

I cursed as I stood and put my jeans on over my boxers. I put my arms in my shirt and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Truck. NOW!" Dad yelled.

"Can I at least brush my teeth?" I glared at him.

“You have five minutes.”

~~~

School sucked as usual. I actually started liking it but only because my Princess was there. Now she was gone.  I looked at Garrett as he spoke during lunch, but I wasn't really listening. I wanted to punch him in the throat for being a part of making me come to school. Hell, I wanted to punch everyone in the throat just because.

I saw the counselor walk into the cafeteria. She had to know where Reese was. They would have to tell her and if they put her in another school, she'd have to fax records.

I got up and walked over to her.

She filled her cup with sweet tea and pretended like she didn't see me.  She went to walk around me, but I moved to block her.

"I can't say anything that you want to hear. Don't waste your time."  She took a drink.

"Is she okay? Just tell me that. Please," I begged.  I was desperate.  I had to know she was being taken care.

She looked around at the silent cafeteria. Teachers and students were watching us. She looked at me again. "You're causing a scene, Satterly. Go finish your lunch."

She moved around me and walked out.

I let out an aggravated sigh. I followed her to her office.

She went to shut the door, but I stopped it with my shoe before it could close.

"Havock, I can't. I will lose my job."

"Is she okay? That's all I want to know." I was on the verge of tears and a fit of rage.  My hands were shaking as I gripped the straps of my backpack.

"As far as I know, she's fine."

"As far as you know?!  That’s not good enough!" I shouted.

She sat down and opened her laptop. "Yes. As far as I know. I haven't heard she wasn't, and the last I checked, she was fine."  I could tell by the determined look she wore she wasn't breaking.

I caught a glimpse of a sticky note stuck to her computer screen that had Reese Johnson written on it. The rest was too small to read from where I was standing, but I'd find a way to get my hands on it.  I walked out and slammed her door.  I didn’t care that I knocked the wreath that hung on the door.

The bell rang, and Jude stopped me before I went to class.

"Come with me." He started walking towards the exit, and I followed.

We walked out to his car. "Glad to see it's running today," I teased. I tried to smile but couldn't. Why the hell did everything have to remind me of her?

He got in, and so did I.

"Where are we going?" I asked as I adjusted the seat so it was leaning back more.

He drove with his knee while he rolled a joint. "Anywhere but the damn school. You needed outta’ there, and it's my duty as a best friend to see that you were freed from that shit hole of torment."

"I'd thank you, but I'm in a shitty mood."

He laughed.

I watched as he drove perfectly while paying close attention to the joint. "You're way too good at that, man."

He smirked. "I plan on adding it to my resume."

He handed it to me to finish rolling. I rolled it tight and licked it to seal it. I lit it and handed it to him.

He took a long hit off it. He handed it to me. I stared at it. I knew I shouldn't, but I wanted to. I needed to ease the pain.  I took a long hit then handed it back to him. I laid my head back against the seat.

"I want to find her, Jude. But I don't know where to look. I’ve went everywhere they could have possibly taken her.  I just don’t know what else to do at this point."

He parked down a dirt road near the river. We got out and walked to the Riverbank. We sat down and finished the joint.

He threw a stick in the water. "I want to help you, but I don't know how.  This is seriously some screwed up shit."

I watched the stick get carried down river. When it left my sight, I looked at Jude. "This is why I never wanted a serious relationship."

"Are you gonna keep tryin' to find her? Or move on?"

I looked away from him. The high was kicking in, and I felt more relaxed.

I shrugged. "I want to, but I have no clue where she is. I keep burning gas and wasting time. It feels like I'm going in circles. I can't live life like this.  It's exhausting."

Moving on would be difficult but would be the logical thing to do. I'd graduate and so would she. We could find each other again if it were meant to be.  That’s right.  I was chalking it up to fate.  I mean, what other options did I have at this point?

"So, what are you saying?" He leaned against a tree. His eyes were sagging and red.

Tears fell down my cheeks, not a rarity these days. "I guess I'm moving on. Just gonna leave it up to fate and start enjoying life again. This depressed shit is getting old." I wiped the tears before he could notice them.

"So, Havock's back?"

"Unfortunately." I smiled with great difficulty. I knew I'd have to push Reese Johnson as far from my mind as possible, and it scared me. But it scared me more to hurt as bad as I had been. It felt like my insides were being ripped to shreds by razor blades. I woke up in the middle of the night, every night, gasping for air. I couldn't do it anymore. I had to become numb to her if I wanted to be able to function.

~~~

I moved off Autumn, breathless.  “Holy shit,” I said as I looked at her.

She laughed as she covered her face with her hand.  “Damn, I’m glad you’re back and over Reese.”

Mood killer.  I sat up and started getting dressed.  I felt her hand on my back and froze.

“Sorry, I know you said her name was off limits. It slipped.”

I shrugged her hand away.  I didn’t answer her.  That name stabbed at my heart like a knife.  I couldn’t stand to hear it.  It killed me.  I grabbed my cell phone and my keys off her nightstand. 

“Your parents will be home soon.  I should go.”

“Don’t be mad at me.  Please.”

I didn’t look at her, I just left.

It was one thing for someone to mention her on accident, like at dinner when mom and dad were talking and her name came up.  But right after I had sex with someone, that shit was unacceptable.  I already felt like an ass for doing it, I didn’t need to be kicked to the ground and spit on by mention of her name.

I looked at the time as I drove.  I needed something, but I didn’t know what.  I didn’t need to go home, that’s for sure.  I drove to my favorite bootlegger.  Jamison and coke would help. 
Maybe.
 

I swung by Jude’s to pick him up after I got what would hopefully numb my brain so I could rest. He was waiting out by the curb, smoking a cigarette.  I stopped and he got in.

“Where we goin’?”  He asked as he looked at the brown paper sack.

“What I’m good at these days.”  I smiled.  “To kill brain cells.”

REESE

I flew across the room and crashed into a table. I grabbed my ribs and gasped for air. Brad was getting way too much enjoyment out of causing me pain.

“You have to fight back! Stop me from throwing you across the room, you idiot!” Brad yelled.

“I CAN'T!” I screamed. Why didn’t he understand? He wasn’t helping me! I, honestly, don’t even think he was trying to help me. I think he was just enjoying taking all his frustration out on me.
Asshole.

I nursed my ribs as I stood. I leaned heavily against the wall. I had sweat pouring down my face. I was tired, and I hurt. I just wanted out of this mad house.

“I think we should take a break,” Troy said as he pinched his nose.

Brad grabbed my arm roughly and led me to my room. Once in he shut the door and locked it. I went over to the hole in the wall and started working on it. Thankfully, they didn't seal it again.  I hurt everywhere, but I didn't care. I wanted out.

“Finally,” I said as I made the hole through to the other side. I kept working on it until it was big enough for me to go through. I wiggled through then looked around.  It was clear. I hobbled to the door and looked out. No one was around. I quietly made my way out the door and down the stairs. I was almost to the front door when I was grabbed from behind.

“Troy!” Brad yelled as he fought with me.

Troy hurried in then after saying some words under his breath, I started to feel drowsy and everything went black.

~~~

I woke up in the basement. For the past two weeks, I had paced it trying to find a way out.
Nothing.
I pulled up the edge of my shirt and saw bruises up and down my side. I was one big bruise.  Training had been difficult, and I wasn't getting any better.  Plus, Brad was an asshole who wasn’t really helping me. I think he got his kicks from beating the hell out of me.

I sat on the edge of my bed and pulled out a drawing notebook Troy was nice enough to get me. I drew Havock's face. A tear fell down my cheek as I finished it and started another one.

I heard yelling from upstairs, and I heard a woman's voice.

The basement door flew open and a red headed woman walked down the stairs. She looked at me then hurried over. She turned my face and saw the bruises that I had gotten from being slammed into the wall.

She turned on Troy and Brad who followed her down.

"What the hell?!" she yelled

"Janet, calm down. We've been training her," Troy said as he took a hesitant step back.

Janet's vibrant green eyes narrowed and she looked back at me. "I brought dinner," she pointed to the bag she had put down when she hurried over to me. "You need to eat, and I'll be back down shortly," she said softly. She then looked at the men. "We're having a talk!" She snapped then they walked upstairs.

I ate dinner then waited for the Janet lady to come back.

After several minutes, she came back downstairs. She had a first aid kit with her. "Let me look you over."

She started nursing my wounds. "I'm so sorry about this, Sweetie," she said as she wrapped my ribs. She sighed. "I'm going to start helping with your training and maybe get you out of this damn basement."

"Thank you, but what I want is out of this nightmare." A tear fell down my cheek.

“I'll do my best,” she said with a slight smile.

I looked at her and wondered why she looked so familiar to me. I thought about it, but just couldn't place her.

~~~

After days, I finally started being able to use my powers. Janet was able to help me a lot more than Troy or Brad ever did. We even had started to become friends. She was four years older than me, but she was fun and nice. I found out she owned a restaurant in town, and she brought me food from it every day.

I looked at my drawing book as tears ran down my cheeks. I wanted Havock.
Why couldn't they just let me see him?

“Why don't you write him a letter? Maybe I can get it to him,” Janet said as she looked over my shoulder at my book.

“They're not going to let you give it to him,” I whispered.

She scoffed. “I've never done things they wanted me to do,” she whispered back then sat down beside me. “It may take me a while to get it to him, but I
will
get it to him.”

I nodded. Then started writing while she left me alone.

Dear Havock,

I don't know how long it will take for you to get this but when it does get to you know it's with all the love I feel for you. 

A tear fell onto the page as I wrote.

I love you so much. I wish you were here with me. I've tried getting out to get to you but they keep catching me. If it wasn't for Janet I wouldn't even be able to get this letter to you. I don't know what else to say Havock. I do know that I will continue to try
to get back to you. I wish I could tell you where I am but they blindfolded me on the way here so I don't know. I do know that your birthday is coming up in a few days and I wanted to tell you happy eighteenth! I want so bad to be there with you. To hold you. To kiss you. Just to be with you. I miss you. I wake up in the night screaming your name.

Another tear hit the page.

I'm sorry. I'm sure this isn't helping. I'll end the letter here with this. No matter how long it takes, I will make my way back to you. I swear it. I love you more than anything.

Love always,

Princess

After I finished the letter, I drew a picture of me and him.  I then wrapped the letter carefully into it. Janet put it in her pocket then hugged me.

“It's going to be all right. Soon you'll get out of here. You'll be eighteen in another month, right?”

I nodded. “I mentioned that to your dad and uncle, but they said it didn't matter. They were going to keep me locked in here until they knew I wouldn't go running back to Havock.” I sighed. “Which means I'm going to be stuck in here for the rest of my life.”

“No, you won't. If I have to break you out, then I will.” She smiled reassuringly at me then left me alone.

I was always alone. I covered my ears as the shadows appeared. They began speaking to me. Tormenting me.  I hated them.

He doesn’t want you.  But we do.  We can help you.  Just listen to us.  Give us a chance.  We can help, Reese.  We can help each other.

They’re voices blanketed me like a cold sheet of ice.  There were several of them and instead of whispers, their voices became screams.

For hours I listened to them screaming at me. Cursing me. Finally, they stopped. I looked up as Troy and Brad came into the room.

“It's time to train again,” Brad said. He had an evil glint in his eyes when he mentioned training.

I groaned and stood up. I took a deep breath then started pulling my powers. I was tired, depressed, and lonely. All of these things weighed on me, and I felt like I was never going to be happy again. I definitely wouldn't ever be the same person again. Would Havock even look at me the same when he found out what I was? Would he still love me when he found out I was a witch?

I threw power at Brad. I always aimed for Brad. It was too weak. I was too weak. He blocked it. He sneered at me and forced some power towards me. I flew across the basement and landed with a thud onto the floor. My ribs were never going to be the same. The only thing that kept me going was the plan to escape and make it to Havock. I stood back to my feet and pulled more power. I threw it at Brad, this time with enough force to make him have to take a few steps back to block it. However, Troy used that moment to hit me with a spell that sent me into the dresser.

My life sucked.

“You have to concentrate. You will hardly ever only go up against one witch at a time! You need to be able to fight more than one person,” Troy lectured.

I rolled my eyes. “I'm not ever planning on fighting,” I stated for what seemed like the hundredth time.

“You'll have to fight whether you like it or not,” Brad said and threw a bolt of power at me. This is how I spent the next three hours. When it was finally over, I fell into bed, exhausted. That's when the shadows came again. They told me all the things they wanted me to do. People they wanted me to kill. I covered my ears with my pillows as I cried out for Havock. I was losing my mind and soon I wouldn't be able to get it back.