Destined to Play, Feel, Fly Trilogy (72 page)

‘How did you go?’ Leo asks Jeremy.

‘Great, but I don’t want to wait, it seems perfect now, while we are together like this.’

Again with the significant looks and silence. Leo nods in agreement.

‘Would you like me to leave so you two can talk in private?’ I ask. ‘I feel like I’m in the middle of something.’

‘Never a truer word spoken, sweetheart.’

‘But absolutely no reason to leave, you are right where you should be.’ I raise my eyebrows confounded by Leo’s words. ‘Right in between us,’ he explains.

Jeremy pulls out a box from the bag he brought in with him and hands it to Leo. ‘You can do the honours, my friend. Your idea, my execution.’

I have no idea what they are up to.

‘We wanted to give you a combined Christmas present, Alexandra. One that reflects who you are and what you mean to both of us.’ He hands me the beautifully-wrapped box. ‘And this is what we came up with.’

Deeply embarrassed that they are giving me a gift and I have nothing for them. ‘Oh, no, please, I haven’t —’ I start to apologise and they simultaneously place their index fingers over my lips to silence my words and we burst out laughing together. ‘God, what hope do I have now?’

‘None whatsoever.’ Jeremy grins. ‘So no apologies. You being here and with us is enough gift for us, so please, just open it.’

I carefully unwrap the packaging and take out the most beautiful necklace of intricately woven black leather rope with three large circles connected to it: one white gold, one yellow gold and one rose gold. It’s stunning. There is a word engraved on each circle.

Past. Present. Future.

Tears immediately well up in my eyes as I’m overcome with emotion. Jeremy and Leo nod to each other, knowing they have hit the heartfelt nerve they
were hoping to and they give me a moment to compose myself.

I have now been blessed with two pieces of precious jewellery that reflect every part of me. My bracelet and my necklace. They symbolise our commitment to each other throughout the ages in different ways. I have no need or desire to have a ring on my finger — I feel complete as I am.

‘It’s more than perfect, thank you.’ I give each of them a meaningful hug.

Jeremy is eager to put it around my neck. As I bend forward I look into Leo’s eyes, knowing that whatever I experienced during my trance, whether it was physically real or more spiritual, they too experienced something of a similar kind. Our interrupted conversation is no longer important or relevant; this necklace wholly symbolises our interconnected lives.

With it around my neck, I notice its weight and I love the feel of it against my skin. I pick the rose gold circle up, running my finger along the engraving. I flip it over when I feel another letter on the reverse side, an ‘S’. I check the others and they too are marked with this letter.

‘Three ‘S’s?’ I look toward Jeremy, then Leo. Their grins explode into full blown smiles as they wait for me to guess.

‘Science?’ Jeremy nods.

‘Spirituality?’ Leo nods.

I shake my head, realising that they understand more than they have been admitting about my trance
with the shaman and the aligning of the stars, and ultimately our entwined destinies.

‘Sexuality?’ I say tentatively but knowing the answer. ‘Your words, sweetheart, not ours.’ They burst out laughing before informing me I need to get dressed and join them in the living room downstairs. They leave together, arm in arm, like brothers and best friends, discussing the wonders of an integrated world.

As I get up from the bed I glance toward the newspaper Leo brought in with the hot chocolate. It has been folded open on a particular page and I notice it’s dated from a couple of weeks ago.

I inhale deeply as I absorb the words in print — absolutely unbelievable! And so the stars align.

I promise myself I will never say never, ever again.

Feeling better than I have in weeks and after making myself more presentable, I emerge from the bedroom.
With my hair blow-dried and wearing black pants, a low-cut red blouse showing off my beautiful new necklace and a cashmere shawl draped over my shoulders I begin to descend the staircase to the living room below.

As my eyes sweep around the room, I pause as I recognise each face in the group of people waiting below. How many more shocks can they give me? I pause on the staircase, overcome with love for my cherished family and loved ones who are staring up toward me. Jeremy appears by my side and guides me down the rest of the stairs to join this merry gathering.

Leo has flown in my parents, and brother and sister’s family, so my nieces and nephews are here. No wonder I hadn’t seen much of Elizabeth and Jordan since we arrived … they will have been in seventh heaven. I hug each and every one of them as though I haven’t seen them in decades. After all I’ve been through, it feels that way.

Jeremy’s parents are here as well and I literally haven’t seen them in decades. They hug me knowing I’m finally returning to be part of their family again, as I once was. I meet Leo and Adam’s parents, who are as gracious and generous as their sons. Seeing them beam with pride at Adam and Robert reinforces that everything that has happened to our lives in recent times, as difficult as the journey was in parts, was well and truly meant to be.

As the path clears I can’t believe that Josef is here, too, and I rush to hug him, so grateful he is alive. He
introduces me to his wife, Nikita, who is a gorgeous female version of her husband and I thank him for saving my life. As I utter the words Martin appears with a woman who can only be Salina by his side and my eyebrows raise in delighted surprise. Martin secures his grip around Salina’s waist, confirming the answer to my silent question. I hug them in congratulations and deep thanks for what they have been through for us.

So many wonderful people and I am just so thrilled we are unexpectedly spending Christmas together. As my fingers play absently with my necklace I go to find Leo and thank him again for everything he has done for us and for giving everyone the opportunity to come together like this. There are some things money can’t buy, but I have to admit that at times like this, it does have its benefits.

Our Christmas Eve dinner is like nothing I have ever experienced before. My family, my friends, my old life and my new integrated life, all together for an enormous banquet dinner. One that I didn’t have to lift a finger for. No list to prepare, no shopping, no cooking, no cleaning. Completely unheard of in my previous life so it feels very weird.

I talk, I eat, I laugh, I cry. I have never felt more love or received so much love. My heart is full and overflowing, my life never more complete. I now have no fear, only sincere hope for the future.

I tuck in my children and wish them sweet dreams, knowing there is no use in trying to temper their
excitement. Christmas Eve is such a magical night for them. How lovely it is, only having to say goodnight to everyone gathered here, rather than goodbye, since we have the next week together.

As Jeremy and I eventually retire to our suite, I can’t believe how happy and exhausted I feel and voice this to him as he kisses me goodnight. I swear I’m asleep before my head hits the pillow.

I wake up early on Christmas morning and take a moment to watch Jeremy sleeping next to me. I smooth his dark hair away from his eyes and just admire his beauty, thanking my lucky stars that he is mine and we are finally together. His eyes open and he catches me staring, a beautiful grin escaping his lips.

It puts me instantly in the mood. He is more gentle with me than he has ever been, stroking my body sensually, worshipping me as though I’m some exotic mystical goddess and I reciprocate. Our love is intense and sincere and beautiful, two souls connecting who are meant to be. What a way to wake up in the morning.

‘That’s better than anything that could come from under a Christmas tree.’

‘Likewise, sweetheart.’

We lay down side by side facing each other, in awe of each other.

‘That’s good, because I’m afraid I don’t have a real present for you, J.’

He looks at me with a wicked grin.

‘What?’

‘Actually, you do.’

‘No, honestly I don’t.’ Oh dear, he is obviously excited that I might have something. ‘I feel awful I haven’t arranged anything. I should have asked Leo or the kids, my mind just hasn’t been …’

He leans over the edge of the bed and picks up something underneath and hands it to me. I shake my head. ‘No way. I’m not opening anything else until I have something to give you.’

‘You can’t deny a gift today of all days and I promise you, this one is as much for me as it is for you, maybe even more so.’

I look at him doubtfully and shake my head. ‘No, it’s not right. I’ll open it later, when we’re even.’

‘AB, I am serious, I really want you to open it now.’

I continue shaking my head.

‘How can you be this bloody stubborn on Christmas Day? It’s wrong on so many levels.’ He straddles my body so I’m trapped beneath him. ‘Fine, I won’t let you out of this bed until you open it.’

‘Are you seriously going to resort to physical strength every time I refuse to do something you want me to?’

‘Whatever it takes, sweetheart,’ he says mischievously. Then his mood shifts. ‘No, seriously, I really want you to open this, it means the world to me, and then some.’ He shifts his body so I’m freed and we’re next to each other again. He props his head up with one arm. ‘Please,
open it for me, for us.’ The depth of his words have the uncanny ability of disarming me.

‘Oh, okay then, please don’t look so forlorn.’

I eye the box suspiciously, given that it looks exactly like a smaller version of the one the necklace came in, and take off the ribbon.

Jeremy’s expression immediately changes to a nervous excitement that is rather infectious, but there’s a serious undertone and I wonder what on earth he could be up to this time. The box is light and nothing rattles inside. As I open its lid, I find a small square piece of white glossy paper inside.

‘What’s this?’

‘Turn it over.’ I swear he is holding his breath as I pick it up and turn it over, realising it is a photo of some sort.

My heart stops, my body stills.

As does his, I’m sure.

Oh. My. God.

‘Are you serious?’

He nods.

‘It can’t be, can it? When? How?’

‘It can be and it is, sweetheart. Are you happy?’ He nervously awaits my response.

‘Twins?’

‘Our twins!’

I
t is so lovely to be back home for a few weeks, away from the cold in Boston, and thankfully Jeremy understood how important it is to me that the twins will have Australian roots. So much has happened in the last year, not least of which is that my blood no longer displays any unique allele. There is no scientific reason for it, other than perhaps the transfusion I was given in hospital, but I am grateful that my AB blood is now as normal as any other person’s. Jeremy organised for the storage of the twins’ umbilical cord blood, containing stem cells, in an undisclosed facility. I know in my heart these cells will carry the healing powers of the next generation now that it no longer registers in my blood. We promised each other we wouldn’t conduct any further research on this until the time comes, giving ourselves time to simply focus on loving them and embracing their development without distractions.

Jeremy’s team has continued working on a radical new way for people living with depression to improve their lives based on the results of my ‘experiment’ with him — which now seems like an eternity ago — and they’ve made successful progress to date. The German company they partner with is about to launch a pilot program, involving a new drug to be used in conjunction with behavioural adult play theories (that I’ve been thrilled to be involved in developing). Only time will tell but I have never seen him as engaged and excited about life as he has been this last year and it truly warms my heart. My love for him deepens by the day.

In the next few years, Jeremy and I will work with Leo on opening his Avalon properties as centres of excellence in relation to the integration of science, sexuality and spirituality, which is exceptionally exciting and engaging work for the three of us, and is after all, the reason we exist in this world. The proceeds from the retreats will be used to fund Leo’s philanthropic projects on behalf of those in less advantageous circumstances.

Elizabeth and Jordan have been so excited about this day and look pristine in their new clothes, staring adoringly at their new baby brother and sister. We are gathered together at Peppermint Bay, surrounded by the sparkling waters of the Derwent River, for the twins’ naming day, having sailed down the coast from Hobart.

Jeremy holds our gorgeous baby girl, Caitlin Eve, and I have the serene Leroy Josef in my arms. Jeremy’s
smile hasn’t disappeared from his face since their safe arrival in the world. Leo, the twins’ godfather, whom we haven’t seen for more than a month, has just flown in via helicopter with an exotic-looking woman. She appears to be of Native American lineage and is simply stunning. He places himself beside me with my sister, the twins’ godmother, next to Jeremy, as the ceremony begins and we recognise that our twins are a miraculous extension of our souls — destiny’s children.

I sidle up to Leo at lunch, who is in great spirits and was very honoured to be asked to be the twins’ godfather — as if it could have been anyone else. I’m keen to learn who this new woman, Mahria, is in his life.

‘It’s so great to see you with someone. How did you meet?’

‘Let’s just say our paths crossed when they were meant to.’ At least I’m now used to his philosophical yet cryptic approach to life.

‘And is the connection strong?’ I respond as I glance toward Mahria and then into his sparkling eyes again. As I do, I am immediately taken back to the memories of my trance in Brazil … thirteen women in the circle. And then I’m overwhelmed by the unconditional love I experienced in the womb-like environment, where I was part of something greater, some connection not yet made, and then it dawns on me as I return to the here and now.

‘How many Avalon properties are you planning, Leo?’

‘Thirteen,’ he says with a knowing smile.

Oh, my goodness. Reality strikes.

‘I’m not the only one, am I?’ The words barely escape as a whisper.

‘Let’s just say, Alexandra, that’s another story entirely.’