Devoted (4 page)

Looking over at Bethany, I give her a reassuring nod before releasing her grip and turning the handle on the door. Drawing in a deep breath, I step inside, silently pleading with her to hear me out.

She says nothing, looking at me expectantly.

“I can’t do it alone,” I murmur, my own emotions getting the best of me.

“No one ever said you could,” she whispers, taking a step towards me. Her eyes never leaving mine, she closes the distance between us until she is standing mere inches away. “Are you asking for my help?”

I am absent of all words as I nod my head at her, hoping this will be enough, and it is. When I feel her arms wrap around my middle, I have the only answer I need from her.

CHAPTER 8
 

Bella

I open my eyes in a panic, the loud thud of the door hitting the wall telling me I am no longer alone. I should be used to this. He never stays gone for too long, only this time he is not alone. It’s been a long time since he has brought someone up here, and bile rises in my throat when I think about what I will be forced to witness. It’s one thing to have it happen to you, but seeing the pain in someone else’s eyes can destroy you.

My gaze lands on the woman he drags behind him. She is fighting him, but he is stronger than she is, so she is wasting her time. She will learn, just as I have, that disobedience causes pain.

“Brought you some company, darlin’,” he says as he tosses the woman into the corner. Even with her hands bound, she quickly jumps to her feet, fire in her eyes as she stands to face him. “I like that little temper of yours. It turns me on,” he laughs. “But you’ll give up soon enough just like this one did.”

I am embarrassed by his words, but he speaks the truth. I have given up. There’s no point in fighting anymore.

He takes a step towards the woman, his fist clenched tightly and reared back. My eyes meet hers, silently begging her to comply. I know what Rattletop is capable of doing. She ignores me completely, as if I am not even present, her gaze boring into his. “If you’re gonna hit me, then get it over with. No matter what you do to me, I’ll never stop fighting.”

The fierceness in her eyes is a breath of fresh air, yet it is terrifying. She has no idea what she is up against, but she will learn just like all the others.

“I can see why Viper keeps you around,” he says, lowering his fist to his side. “I bet he’s gonna miss that sweet ass of yours.”

“He won’t be missing me for long. He’ll come for me,” she says with confidence. I had been delusional once too.

“And he will die. I'm not afraid of Viper. He’s nothing!” I have never seen Rattletop affected by someone like this before, but this woman is getting to him.

She shakes her head at him, “You’ve got it all wrong. You are nothing but a sick fucker who gets his kicks out of hurting women. What about her?” She nods in my direction. “She’s a fuckin’ kid. And you call yourself a man? I'm gonna enjoy watching you die,” she seethes, the hatred in her voice echoing in the small room.

He stalks towards the woman, backhanding her hard. She doesn’t flinch or make a sound other than the loud thud she makes as she crashes to the floor. I don’t even realize I’m holding my breath until I let the rush of air from my lungs when she lifts her gaze to his. “Is that the best you’ve got?” she smiles at him.

Seething with anger, Rattletop turns sharply on his heel, stalking towards the door. I breathe a sigh of relief that he is leaving, only for him to turn around abruptly and rush towards me. I have no time to prepare myself for his clenched fist as it collides with my cheek, the force behind it causing me to fall backwards. Straddling my small frame, he begins to pummel me with his fists, and I’m only vaguely aware of the woman pleading with him to stop before everything turns to black.

*****

My face aches as I crack my eyes open, half expecting him to be smirking at me. Instead, I am greeted by an all too familiar face, one that has me believing I am dreaming.

“She’s waking up,” he says into the room.

“We need to get out of here, Dog!” a woman pleads with him, and I instantly recognize her voice. It takes me a moment to realize that he is really here, touching me. I can feel the warmth of his hand on my cheek and see the pain in his eyes. This is reality. He is here to save me.

He nods his head, looking down at me. “I’m so sorry Bella. I wish I had found you sooner.” His eyes are filled with a mixture of relief and anguish, a reflection of what I hear in his tone. “Can you walk?”

I nod my head, not trusting myself to speak. He gently pulls me to my feet and then looks over at the woman. “Jade, can you take her? Get her to safety so I can finish this?”

“We go together,” the woman says fiercely. “Viper will be here soon. You can exact your revenge then. Let’s concentrate on getting her away from this place.”

I open my mouth to speak, intent on begging him to listen to her when the door opens with a crash, all eyes landing on the venomous look on Rattletop’s face. “What the fuck are you doing in here?” he asks, his gaze finding my uncle’s.

Dog steps away from me, walking towards Rattletop with a calm I barely recognize. “What is she doing in here?” he asks, coming to a stop within arm’s reach of Rattletop.

He shrugs, a smile lifting the corner of his mouth. “What can I say? I took her for my own. Couldn't stand the thought of some other prick burying himself into that tight virgin pussy, so I claimed her.”

“You son of a bitch! She’s a fuckin’ kid!”

“She’s a piece of pussy!” he roars. “My piece of pussy,” he adds, his voice calming. “I won't let her go.” Rattletop takes another step forward, looking over Dog’s shoulder to the woman. “She’s mine too. Keep your mouth shut, and I’ll think about sharing her with you.”

“You’re sick!” Dog wails. “She’s a kid! Someone’s daughter!”

“Or someone’s niece,” Rattletop says as he pulls a pistol from the back of his jeans, pointing it straight at my uncle. “You didn't think I was that fuckin’ stupid, did you? I knew from the start who you were and why you were here. Same with Demon. There’s always someone trying to infiltrate the club for one reason or another. Sometimes I let ‘em in, just like I did with you. How does it feel to know that I was fuckin’ your sweet little niece right under your nose the entire time? You know, I even thought about bringing you up here, letting you watch me take her over and over again, but you were too useful for that. But now that you’re here, maybe I’ll rethink my decision. You can watch me take them both before I gut you.”

“You sick son of a bitch!” Dog shouts, rushing towards him. Everything happens so quickly, it almost seems unreal. Rattletop is knocked to the ground and everything becomes a blur as they begin pummeling one another.

I am screaming out, begging anyone who will listen for help, only to find myself unable to breathe when Dog is on his knees and Rattletop points the barrel of the gun to the back of his head.

Dog’s eyes meet mine, a look of regret within them as Rattletop pulls the trigger without saying a word. The sound is deafening and my heart stops beating as I watch in disbelief as my uncle crashes to the floor, his eyes still locked with mine.

Rattletop stalks towards me, pausing only momentarily as he steps over the dead body of my uncle. “I did this for you, Bella. So that we can be together, forever.”

Fear grips me as he reaches out, his murderous hand touching my cheek. I want to scream at him, fight him, to kill him, but I am unable to move. I am frozen in place, unable to tear my gaze away from the man who was the closest thing to a father I ever had.

“Look at me!” he demands, but I can’t comply. My uncle is dead and it’s my fault. I may not have pulled the trigger, but if not for me he would not have been here. “Kiss me!”

I shake my head, bile rising in the back of my throat as he grabs the back of my head, his fingers roughly pulling my hair as he lowers his lips to mine. I hate him! It should be him lying on the floor and not my uncle. I keep repeating the words over and over inside my head but they are just that, words. I do not act on them. I simply do what I have done since I have been here and close my eyes, letting him have complete control over me.

Only when he pulls away from me and I hear a gurgling sound do I dare open my eyes. Jade is standing in front of me, and my eyes are drawn to the blood drenched blade she grasps in her hand. When I raise my eyes to meet hers, I can see pain within them. She lowers her gaze to Rattletop, who has dropped to his knees, his hand clutching his neck tightly. Blood pours from between his fingertips, the only audible sound in the room the gurgling sound coming from the man I despise more than anything.

I should be ecstatic knowing his life is coming to an end, or even relieved. Instead I feel somewhat sorry for the man who is reaching out to me as he bleeds to death right before my eyes. Was he always this way or did someone or something change him? Did he ever have a compassionate bone in his body, or was he always this evil? Would he have ever let me go or would he have held me prisoner for the remainder of my life? These questions repeat in my head, the answers I will never know.

As Rattletop takes his final breath, everything comes crashing down on me. The last year of my life I’ve watched my uncle die in front of my eyes and now the demise of Rattletop. I begin to cry hysterically, unable to contain the emotions that overwhelm me.

Jade rushes to me, dropping the knife to the floor and wraps her arms around me. “It’s going to be alright,” she says, and I trust her. For the first time in a long time, I hope my nightmare has finally ended, but in truth, it has only just begun.

CHAPTER 9
 

Blake

“It’s time to destroy what’s destroying you.”
 

Hawk’s words echo in my mind as I stare at the barren wall, avoiding his gaze. I’ve never felt weaker than I do at this very moment. I believed I was in control. That once I had made up my mind, quitting would be a simple process. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

“This what you want?”

Lowering my gaze, my eyes land on the tabletop, every device that will ease my pain set out before me. Instinctively I reach out, my hand trembling. This is my vice. Without it, I am weak. I am unable to think or act rationally. My body aches in its absence because it owns me – mind, body and soul.

“Tell me who’s in control?” Hawk asks, demanding my attention. When I lift my eyes to his, he looks at me knowingly. “This is your master. Just the sight of it makes you whole. Everything you ever wanted or needed is right in front of you, within your reach.”

My hand hovers over the syringe in desperation, but my eyes are locked on his, silently pleading with him to take it all away.

“All it takes is one encounter for it to be in complete control.” Reaching out, Hawk dumps the contents of the baggie into the metal spoon.

“There’s no mercy.” Ripping the cotton off the end of the Q-Tip, he balls it between his fingertips, dropping it onto the spoon.

“Before you know it, you’re willing to do anything to get more – lie, cheat, steal… it doesn’t matter. All that matters is getting your next fix.” Grabbing hold of the syringe, he draws up a dab of water, squirting it into the spoon.

My eyes are glued to his hands as he works. The pain intensifies as I watch him pass a burning lighter under the spoon. As the mixture dissolves, I feel my entire body begin to quiver, anticipating what is to come.

As he draws the solution into the syringe, my breathing becomes erratic. I want… no, I need this.

“So what are you waiting for?” he asks, placing the filled syringe in front of me.

I am desperate to feel that rush again, the euphoria it produces and the unsurmountable pleasure that will follow. Grasping the syringe tightly in my hand, I shut my eyes, imagining the relief that will come. I waste no time in ripping the top off of the hypodermic.

Placing the needle flat on the bend of my arm, I line up the point with my vein. Just as I press the tip into my vein, I stop, the image of my sister and mother invading my mind.

Tell me who’s in control?
The answer is simple and Hawk knows it because he’s been there. I haven’t been in control in a very long time. Releasing my hold on the syringe, I let it fall from my arm.

“You don’t have to see the whole staircase to take the first step,” he says, my eyes raising to meet his. “You just changed your life Blake, whether you know it or not.”

*****

“There are two types of pain in this world - the pain that hurts you and the pain that changes you.”

Closing my eyes, I press my face onto the linoleum in an attempt to absorb its coolness. Pain doesn’t even begin to describe the torture I am experiencing. Crying out in agony, I pray to a nonexistent God to end it all. 

Every muscle in my body cramps up, the pain unbearable. “Help me,” I beg.

“I am,” Hawk says, looking down at me as I writhe in pain on the floor.

His words are of little consolation when I feel my stomach begin to spasm. I try in vain to raise my body off the floor, but weakness has set in and I am unable to move. With my face plastered to the floor, I empty the contents of my stomach once again, the rancid fluid surrounding me.

When the retching finally subsides, I welcome the darkness that begins to envelop me.

“You’ll get through this, Blake. I promise.”