Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission (69 page)

In addition to the allure of power, however, aesthetic and sensual elements make feet, shoes, or boots exceptionally sexy. A well-formed foot or leg is a supreme blend of form, grace, and function, inspiring reverence in its devotees. And the materials from which a shoe or boot is made can deliver powerful erotic stimuli.

Interest in shoes is also a culturally acquired phenomenon: Imelda Marcos is not the only person who owns shoes for every possible occasion and mood. The smell and texture of leather, the bright gleam of a polished or patent leather shoe, and other details of shoe fashion win the favor not only of fetishists but of men and women the world over.

I
NTERVIEWS

When
Leg Show
was created, everyone in the business, including myself, laughed at it. A magazine about legs? Who’s going to be interested in that? You know, “Americans want T-and-A.” Since I took over
Leg Show
, its sales have quadrupled. It went from being a bimonthly to an all-color monthly. There are about six imitators of
Leg Show
now. I think a large measure of its success was my moving it towards D&S. I think it’s the most undernourished market in the sex field in the U.S. today. There is a huge community of men who are interested in sexual submission in the United States, and I think in the world.
Leg Show
sells better in Europe than any of the other magazines I’ve ever worked on. It’s particularly of interest in England and [in] the Germanic countries. It reaches about a quarter of a million readers a month. Foot fetishism figures big in all of its permutations, which includes crushing with the feet, stockinged-foot fetishism, shoe dangling, all the myriad interests—everything below the waist except genitalia, which seem to be of least interest to the
Leg Show
readers.

I’d say the most common interest is in a small, well formed, high arched, straight toed, soft, unblemished female foot with a certain amount of odor. Shoe dangling is equivalent to flashing. You see it all the time. A woman sits and crosses her legs, and she pops her shoe off at the heel and dangles it from the toes, generally slipping the foot around. Some women are really acrobatic with it. For the women I think it’s an unconscious habit to relieve the tightness of the shoes, but for men it can look like a very purposeful tease. I have to admit that I have fun with it sometimes and do it as a purposeful tease. I think there are other women who, once they find that out, can play with it.

From there, you get people who want to be walked on by high heels or bare feet. It gives you a nice peek up the skirt, for one thing, but it also impresses the power of the woman on the man. There’s a related fetish of men who want to be very small, from an inch to a foot high, and want to be stepped on. Beyond that, there are people who want to be kicked by feet; people who are interested in very dirty feet or huge feet, feet that look powerful.

Interestingly, I have one of the largest lesbian readerships of any of the so-called men’s magazines. Most of the women who have submissive foot fetishes are lesbian, in my readership. I try and keep
Leg Show
very reader-participation-oriented.
It helps the readers to not feel so alone. This is what the letters express over and over: “I read
Leg Show
[and] I know I’m not alone, because I see so many other readers participating.” I just had an article written by a bisexual woman who is a [D&S] foot fetishist. She plays both roles but definitely likes to worship the feet of other women, though I believe she’s a married woman. She sent in some photographs of herself and her feet and wrote very candid memoirs of how she got interested in female feet and her original encounters with other women.

[Another] area of foot fetishism is tickling. Tickling fetishists are often dominant; I call it the guilty sadist. We know that we’re inflicting pain and suffering on somebody when we tickle them, but the person is laughing. And there is control, because almost every tickle fetishist wants to restrain their victim. Personally, I don’t like being out of control, and so I don’t like people to tickle me, but I do understand that these people are my readers, and I don’t want to discriminate against any of them. I feel that I have to have compassion for all to have compassion for any.

It seems to me that there is kind of an obsessive-compulsive nature to fetishists, which goes along with power relationships: They want things black and white; they want things at one or the other extreme. Those gray areas are not as comfortable. I would probably just break it down 50-50 as far as people who say they just have a foot fetish—they like women with pretty feet, and that’s about as far as it goes; the other 50 percent are really megasexual; they’re people who are interested in all kinds of unusual sexuality. Those tend to be the people involved in power relationships.

I want to let all people know that their sexuality is not something they’ve chosen—it’s a part of them, just like hair color or eye color. Don’t spend your life not enjoying what’s pleasurable to you. I was shocked at the number of people who were into feet. I thought I’d start this little club. Well, I have received over 20,000 requests for information over the years [just from my little ads]. People need to know that there are places to go for whatever you like, men and women, straight and gay, bi, whatever. There are wonderful people, professional people, good people [out there]. Most of my members are doctors and lawyers and accountants and teachers. We’re real people—your brothers, your uncles, your cousins and aunts and mothers. [Our] stories need to be told. We were blessed with this thing called sexuality. Don’t stick it in a closet. It’s a gift. Have pleasure with it. I guess my emotions speak clearly: You’ve got to take the risk to be yourself.

The Foot Fraternity was established as an affirmation group. I found the need to affirm [others] because I [once] needed somebody to tell me, “You
want to smell my feet? That’s okay, it doesn’t hurt anybody. It’s innocent.” That was a second coming-out and happened in my 20s, when I was dealing with sexuality and being okay with who I was and accepting all of who I was—every bit of me. It took time and some counseling to realize that it doesn’t matter what I like as long as it’s between consenting adults and doesn’t hurt anyone. It took a little time in my mind to redo my Catholic upbringing—thinking of missionary position as the only right way. [Once] I was okay with it, I thought, I’m going to help other people. All people—straight [or] gay—need to be okay with what they like sexually, as long as it doesn’t infringe on anybody else’s right or intentionally hurt somebody who doesn’t want to be hurt.

I have just two small ads out, letting people know that the Foot Fraternity exists, [but] I send out no less than 25 letters a week to people [who are] requesting information. That’s a lot of people. I would say about 10 percent of my members are either married or involved with women. [Many] are married to women but need a man’s feet in their life. A small percentage [are interested in women’s feet], but the majority are into men’s feet. [We have something which corresponds to] the stereotypical woman-with-the-stiletto-heels: A lot of our members enjoy worshiping the boots of a policeman, because it’s a symbol of authority. Certain people only like Weejun penny loafers; [others] only like boots. [With] some, it doesn’t matter as long as it’s on a male foot. It’s a diverse group.

I’ve been very fortunate [because] I’ve formed some interesting hypotheses from talking to thousands of people. I believe that our sexuality is determined before we’re five years old; some significant emotional event happens to us in those years that makes that area erotic or exciting to us. I [also] believe that there’s some genetic predisposition to liking certain things. Part of it is in the genes, and part of it is that significant event. Maybe we were bounced on Daddy’s knee, or Daddy tickled us with his foot, and we were intrigued by watching Daddy’s foot come over our face. [Maybe] it was so emotional to us that we held onto that image, and that blended into our sexuality at puberty. I [still] don’t know why the foot and all the verbalization and domination that goes along with it is so erotic to me. Quite frankly, I’ve had such pleasure with it that I don’t really care why.

[The Foot Fraternity’s] major purpose is to help guys meet other guys into their fetish and fantasy, primarily dealing with the foot, but also dealing with other things—uniforms, people being wet. The organization deals with most any fetish; my only restriction is that you cannot ask for or go for somebody under 18. [But we have] gays, straights; we’ve got married men who are happy with their wives but are still intrigued by the male foot but want to keep their marriage, too. It’s simply called the Foot Fraternity
because that was where the prime interest was, but [members] realized that it overlaps [into] many areas; [it] gets into wrestling [and] many other things.

[When] people write for information, I send out an application with samples of the photos and videotapes that we do: foot scenes and shoe, boot, sock, tickle scenes. [The] magazine is [quarterly]; two times a year [it] has a complete listing of all the members, not with their names but with a code number. You write a letter [and] send it to me for forwarding. From that point on, you’re on your own: I never give out any names or addresses. That’s up to the individual. We also have gatherings once a year. This year, we had a four-day weekend gathering that was more like a family reunion. We had our meals together; we talked and shared on other issues [though] there was foot play going on as well. We took boat trips; we saw the city—it was just a group of people getting together who had a common interest.

I believe that with most people [the foot fetish] leads into other areas. For me it does. The foot fetish is the primary area of interest, but my interest in bondage, humiliation, and domination is very strong. It’s not just the foot alone that I wish to serve and be beneath and worship. I consider myself to be submissive. However, in the foot scene I find that it’s very easy to play either a top or a bottom. For example, if I meet someone who is into the foot scene [and] is into working on feet, I don’t mind having him work on mine. It feels very good, very comfortable, and I can play the part very well. It’s intriguing, and I find that I can be versatile with it. However, if I had a preference as to what would be the most exciting, I would choose to be submissive.

I really enjoy and get off on smelling the feet of straight men, [because] they’re almost untouchable. If I could get down and smell their feet and worship them, and they’ll let me do that or let me buy their new shoes or socks and smell their old ones and be amused or laugh at me or call me their little faggot slave, the pleasure is tremendous! That they’re amused by my humiliating myself, by my being degraded by them, is erotic. It’s verbal eroticism. I don’t want to be hurt, but I certainly don’t mind them putting pressure on my face. I like the idea of being a footmat and being walked on, if I can support the weight of the man.

Generally, the men that I deal with are so okay with their own sexuality that it’s not threatening to them. If a man is not okay with his own sexuality, we’ll never get to the point where I’ll ask. I test his response; if it is nonchalant, I know he’s okay with who he is and not threatened. He knows what he likes, and this doesn’t bother him. It’s a little more exciting if it’s a straight man, because somehow the superiority I think they must feel places me even more in their respect. I like to hear their orders; I like to hear them
laugh; I like to watch them look down at my face beneath their feet and smile [as if to say], “I can do anything to this guy.”