Discovering April (7 page)

“So, where are these amazing donuts I keep hearing about?” I lean on the edge of the table, trying to act casual.

I see a smile creep over his face. “So I was right about the woman troubles?” he jokes, still looking down and not making eye contact.

“Women always have something troubling them. If I had a donut for every trouble, I’d be a cow!”

He laughs. “They are this way, then,” he says, guiding me over to the table across the shop with the boxes of donuts. He picks up a half dozen before looking over at me as if he’s inspecting me. He puts it back and picks up a full dozen. I can’t help the burst of laughter that bubbles out of me. Actual laughter, just when I think I would never laugh again.

“What? I can see you need it!” he quips over his shoulder as he takes the box to the register. I’m still chuckling by the time he returns and ushers me back outside.

“I really look that bad?”

“Nah, I was just saying it looks like it’s been a while since you’ve had a donut.”

I roll my eyes because he must be lying, but I follow him around back and pause, watching him as he starts off toward the line of apple trees.

“Where are you going?”

“To eat donuts!” he sarcastically yells with his back to me, holding up the box in his hands for emphasis.

“Can’t we just eat them here?” I indicate a picnic table a few feet away.

He pauses and looks back at the rickety old table in disgust. “Nah, I have a better place.” Without another word, he turns and begins walking again.

Having peaked my curiosity now, I follow. I silently walk behind him as he guides the way through a maze of apple and pear trees. It seems endless; the rows keep going and going. Finally, my breath gets labored and my legs become a little sore. My flats are definitely not made for walking.

“Where are you taking me? You’re not going to kill me and bury me up here, are you?”

His back stiffens as he pauses at the end of the row in front of me. Picking up my pace, I break into a slight jog. I didn’t mean to offend him with my joke. As soon as I walk up to his side, I see it. On top of the hill of orchard trees sits a picnic table overlooking another hill of trees of various fruits that slopes down into a meadow of wild flowers. The meadow appears to stretch to the end of the world. I see the sun setting behind the meadow and I can’t help but think that it looks larger than I’ve ever seen. The sun’s orange and red hues light up the sky, making the fruit shimmer below us.

I continue to scan the vast scenery before me until I notice Jared is sitting on top of the picnic table with the box of donuts beside him, watching me. I close my mouth, walk over to him, and hop up beside him awkwardly.

“Good choice,” I nod, grabbing a donut and taking a big bite as I look out over the amazing view.

“Told you.” He shrugs, grabbing a donut himself.

I sneak a glance at him. He’s not that scrawny kid I remember; this guy beside me is kind of a stranger. An older and mildly attractive – in a robust, do-it-yourself kind of way – stranger.

We sit in silence like this for what feels like an eternity, marveling at the beauty of nature before us. Before long, I reach for another donut, only to find the box empty. We finished the entire box! What do you know, he was right; I had a lot of women troubles to make up for. The last ray of sunshine finally slips behind the endless meadow before he finally speaks.

“So, you want to talk about it?” He turns to me as darkness spreads across the sky.

“Not really,” I respond, cutting off all further conversation about my complicated love life. “Shouldn’t we be getting home?” I change the subject, shivering as the wind blows through my shirt.

“It’s just getting good. Just a few more minutes.”

“Fine,” I concede, realizing he’s the one with the keys and I have no idea how to drive a motorcycle.

As the words escape my mouth, I see the night sky once again light up. This time it’s illuminated with stars that twinkle down upon us. Jared leans back against the picnic table with his hands behind his head. I copy him, coming a little closer than I’m normally comfortable with because of the width of the table.

“It’s beautiful,” I whisper before turning to him. “Do you come here a lot?”

“Since my parents died.” He’s certainly a man of few words, but then he begins to expand. “Sometimes you just need to get away from it all to refocus again.”

“Yea, I get it.” Truer words have never been spoken. Truth is, I needed to get away. I needed this and I think he knew it.

“Thanks for this.” I glance over at him.

Finally turning his head to look at me, he says, “Just doing my neighborly duty.”

I smile a toothy grin as I look back up to the sky. “You know, I think I have an app that tells the constellations!” I blurt out, reaching into my back pocket for my phone.

“You don’t need an app for that!” he mocks, coming closer. “You see these dots?” he asks, pointing to the sky to our right.

“Yea.”

“Then these that trail off? That’s the Big Dipper.” He continues to point before switching to another grouping of stars. “You see the collection over here? That’s what astrologists call the Pegasus.”

“I can’t see it,” I say, squinting my eyes like that will make a difference.

He scoots closer to my eye level and points again. “You see the three here and then that tail? Then these two are the legs… ”

“Oh.” I realize what his proximity is doing to my irregular heartbeat. I can smell his soap again. He looks over at me and realizes I’m looking at him. My eyes dart to his lips and I notice they are spread just slightly. His chin moves slightly towards me and I stop breathing, thinking he might kiss me. His eyes meet mine once again and my heart begins beating excitedly. After a few seconds, he pulls away and scoots over a bit, giving me more room. He stares up at the sky like he can’t look at me anymore.

Hoping to diffuse the situation I ask, “How do you know all this?”

“You come here a lot, you learn stuff.” And just like that, we are back to replying with concise answers.

We lay in silence, staring up at the moon and the stars until my eyelids get heavy and my mind begins to drift.

A HOOTING OWL in the distance brings me back to consciousness. I notice I’m lying with my head on Jared’s shoulder and my hand is on his chest for warmth—probably. I begin to shiver. Jared jerks up, too, breaking out of my grasp. Did we just fall asleep together? I blush in the darkness.

“We should be getting back,” he responds, hopping off the table, away from me.

I rub my eyes and yawn as I do the same. He tosses the empty box of my women troubles in the trash before taking off into the darkness of the trees.

“Wait! Wait for me!” I yell, not able to see him at all.

I hear rustling before I see a silhouette appear. It walks right up to me and grabs my wrist before heading back into the trees. I can’t see a thing; I am walking straight into branches and tripping over tree roots, but Jared seems to know exactly where he is.

After what feels like an eternity and a dark gloomy forest of trees, we make it back to the shop and his bike. Throwing his helmet on, he hops on and starts up the bike. I’m still strapping my helmet on sleepily when he revs the engine and I think for a second he might leave me. So I jump on, grab hold of his waist, and we are off. Gliding through the dark empty roads, the moon seems to follow us wherever we turn. By the time we reach the highway my teeth are chattering as the wind rips through my tee shirt. I don’t know if he hears it or if he feels my teeth spasming against his back, but he rips the bike over to the side of the road and hops off again. I turn curiously and watch as he digs into the saddlebag beside my leg and pulls out a leather jacket. He wraps it around my shoulders in silence before hopping back in front of me and starting it up again. I poke my hands through the warm sleeves and warm up against his back as I begin wondering: is he mad at me? Why won’t he talk to me? Does he think I was trying to make a move on him? A million or so more questions among these lines plague my mind the entire silent ride home. As the minutes pass, I begin to dread the awkward goodbye that’s coming.

By the time we exit the highway and turn down our street, I’ve exhausted every possible scenario in my head. He’s pulling up into his driveway when the butterflies begin beating against my insides.

He puts the bike in park and slides down the kickstand, hopping off as he unstraps his helmet. I notice he doesn’t offer to help me off this time, but I slide my leg over and hop down myself.

Before I lose all confidence, I hand him my helmet. “Thanks for this; I really needed it.” I walk across my driveway to my own front porch.

He doesn’t say a word, and I watch as he brings his bike up the driveway to the garage. I’m fumbling with my door, still waiting for some kind of response, but he never returns to the front. I finally push my way into the house, disappointed. That was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me, yet it was also the most awkward. What was he thinking? Why won’t he talk to me?

I head upstairs and I’m about to undress when I realize I’m still wearing his jacket. I take it off and hang it over my chair. It’ll have to wait until tomorrow I’m definitely not going back there tonight. I slip on my pajamas and under my covers before my mind once again focuses on Hunter. It isn’t long before light shining through my window grabs my attention. Directly across from my window is Jared’s. I watch as he takes off his shirt and throws it across the room. Who would have thought working on cars could make one so … buff.

I watch as he paces around his room as if he’s looking for something. Eventually, he collapses onto the side of his bed and runs his hands down his face. Shaking his head, he gets back up and flicks off the light. And I drift off to sleep, dreaming about my buff neighbor.

THE NEXT DAY, I’m woken up by the sound of power tools outside my window. I glance over at the clock: it’s 7 o’clock on a Saturday morning. I crash back down, but the constant drilling eventually has me rolling out of bed. I go to grab my towel to take a shower when I see Jared’s jacket still hanging over my chair. I don’t know what I was expecting; maybe that it would disappear over night so I didn’t have to see him again. I dread awkward moments like this, yet I can’t ever seem to escape them.

By the time I’m ready to leave the house, I’m dressed in my good jeans and a blouse. I’ve put on some makeup and I make sure to bring my laptop bag to look like I have places to go. Taking a deep breath before I open the front door, I lock it behind me and hop down the stairs with Jared’s jacket it my hands. When I turn to face him and see him wiping grease from his hands with a dirty red towel. With a deep breath, I begin walking right up to him before I can change my mind. He doesn’t look up until I’m over the daisies separating our driveways. I’m practically on top of him when I toss him his jacket.

“I believe this is yours,” I state coldly as he catches it in his dirty hands.

Without another word I whip around to head towards my car; he still doesn’t say anything. Once inside my car, I throw my bag onto my passenger seat and turn to see that he has walked back inside the garage like nothing has happened again. My thoughts unite on one singular phrase: ‘What the fuck?!’

That’s it! I can’t take this anymore
. I climb out of the car and slam the door behind me, walking back up his driveway with purpose. I’m going to give this jerk a piece of my mind. Before I lose my confidence, I pick up my stubborn and determined pace as I continue further up the driveway into his garage. He’s digging through a drawer for something when he turns to see me barreling down on him.

“What the hell?! Did I do something? Offend you? Piss you off? Because your silence is sure as hell pissing
me
off!” I blurt out before my common sense kicks in.

He stares at me, surprised and taken aback for a few minutes. I raise my eyebrows and he finally clears his throat.

“Wanna go for a ride?” he asks, indicating his dirty Jeep Wrangler in the driveway.

“What?!”

“Do. You. Want. To. Go. For-a. Ride?” he mockingly repeats as if I’m deaf.