Divergent Parody: Avirgent (12 page)

 ---

“Two-Tone's the name, don't wear it out.”  He raised his hand, putting his rifle at his shoulders. The ten other people behind him did the same. Three of them were the Asian people in the tattoo shop.

I notched a brow. “Two-Tone? As in, “Joey Two-Tone?”

“Yeah, you deaf?” said a short man behind him, with a squeaky voice.

Joey smacked him upside his head, and the group laughed.

“What was that for?”

“For being rude to this gorgeous lady. You know how the Two-Tone family treats women.” He took my hand and kissed it. He looked up at me with a sly smile. “With affection and tenderness. We treat them like Queens. Like the Queen she will soon be.”

He let my hand fall as I dropped my mouth in awe.

 He looked down to TB4, still clutching his elbow. “Sorry fella, but you know how it is when the crown's up for grabs. Anyone can just reach out and grab it. Nothing personal.” He snapped his fingers. “John and Ying, get this guy to the nearest hospital quick.”

John and Ying were two  muscular Asian men from the shop, and picked up TB4 like he were a ragdoll.

As they carted off  TB4, he looked up to the sky almost hollow as if there were no soul in him and said, “I just wanted to change the world. That's all I wanted. Was that too much? That's all I-”

“Oh please, get out of here with that shit! You wanted to change the world my ass! Once Jeanine's crown was gone, you'd be out there parading yours like it were your own kid. Go sleep it off. You'll be fine in the morning ya crybaby.”

 Joey Two-Tone lit a cigarette and blew a cloud of smoke into the air satisfied. He smiled at me with his bright teeth and patted my shoulder.

 “So, how you doing?”

“Cold, but alright I suppose. TB4 has my sweater...don't take it from him. And...” I looked in the group and didn't see Juniper.

“Where's Juniper?”

Joey held his cigarette down as he held his head down and so did everyone else.

Joey looked deep into my eyes and said, “They got her. Girl confessed everything and yet they
still
sent her over that fence.”

 I hung my head then, and couldn't help but feel sorry for her. She seemed like she was bored all the time, but I was getting ready to warm up to her quick.

 “Anyway,” He inhaled his cigarette and blew a cloud of smoke. “We can't dwell on the past kid. Hell, I heard about little Al. Poor kid, but we gotta move on forward to what really matters.”

“What's that?”

“Your cooperation in killing Jeanine, and making this city all mine.”

“I'm all for killing Jeanine. I don't know much about her, but I hate her because I'm supposed too.”

 “Good girl!” He laughed. “Very good. Alright, listen, they're going to-”

BOOM!

 The building collapsed beneath us, but somehow we floated in the air as the rubble disintegrated to ash and smoke.

“What the Hell happened?!”

We were still floating in the air and I turned around, still floating. I saw a military army tank and the barrel of the tank's gun staring up at us. Jeanine was right there with the entire smart-ass faction-including my brother, standing with their noses tipped high to the air.

 He yelled through a speaker, “Hey! Get down here Wonder Woman, so we can kill you!”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because you're a menace to society. That's why!” yelled Jeanine. She was a blonde woman with a serious face and a pallid grin. Urrgh. “pallid grin.” Sorry, old me was coming out again and that was one of the few things I could use.

 I stood up tall and raised my fists toward them, the evil empire that didn't seem so evil, but was only trying to protect themselves...wait.

“You will never have me! I will never back down! I will never bow for anyone!”

“You tell her!” yelled Joey Two-Tone, suddenly eating a subway sandwich.

I saw my Mom come out of the back of one building behind them and she said, “Sorry I couldn't make it earlier. Am I too late for the end?”

Jeanine smiled. “No, you just made it. This is the part where we kill their beloved YA heroine. Say hi to the Devil for me Mika Ock!”

I spouted back,” Why don't you go suck on a co-”

BANG!
I felt something sharp hit the back of my head, and I fell to the floor.

“What the Hell?!” Shouted Joey Two-Tone in the last few seconds of my life. It didn't make any sense, it never made any sense, and it still doesn't. I was dead, and would never know why. I was killed by a freak in the night.

 
CHAPTER 8: THE FOREST OF MY DREAM

 The world of the after-life was like a dream, just a vanilla coated world filled with Angels with bright blonde colored hair. And the only people were good looking people. No one ugly. It calmed my heart and satisfied me beyond anything I could ever imagine. Beyond my deepest desires, but like all good things, it didn't last for long.

 I woke up, with the music of metal clashing against metal and bullets blazing, screaming in my ears. The man in shades was shaking me, telling me that the eggs were in the cars ignition or something.

“What the Hell do you mean?” I said.

“I don't know, I'm just spouting crap.”

“Oh. Well, okay. What's going on?”

“A war.”

“Am I alive?”

“Yes. It's time Ms. Mika Ock...to fulfill your destiny.”

“What destiny?”

“As the greatest Young Adult heroine of all time. As the greatest woman of all time. You died because the author felt like it would provide for much needed shock value and that killing you off would serve a greater purpose for the world. Everyone was fighting over you, for reasons unexplained. There are other Avirgents out there after-all.”

“How come I haven't seen them yet?”

 “Because the author isn't experienced enough to handle several different characters that way. They keep killing off old ones, and adding new ones not very exciting. In the story this one is based on, you died almost exactly the same.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, but it was so stupid. Anyway, get yourself up, and look toward the sky again.”

I stood up and looked at the sky again. There were aliens and vampires floating above as well as humans shooting at them with missiles, and several other various firearms.

 “It happened. The ones from beyond the fence.”

“Yup. You know, we can end this all right now if you want.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, with the snap of a finger. Just...end it all. Wouldn't that be nice? One finger, one choice to end it all...much like how one choice can lose a portion of your fanbase?”

“I suppose so.”

 He nodded. “Alright then.” He snapped his fingers, and it was all over. There was no more fighting. There was just a silent street with a cool wind in the night. Off in the distance, the Ferris Wheel started lighting up in all colors of the rainbow on every spoke of the wheel and some pop music started playing out of it.

“
Oh, the night is my love,

City light avirgent girl
In the day nothing matters
It's the night time that flatters
In the night, no control
Through the wall something's beating
Wearing white as you're running
Down the street of my soul...

 The woman continued to sing and it felt like the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. It brought me to peace, it brought me to joy.

 “Would you like to ride that Ferris Wheel?”

“Yes, I would definitely love to.”

He held out his hand and I took it. We transported into the Ferris Wheel instantly, and the world below us was like it were made by ants, and we were giants.

The old man was no longer creepy to me. He was like a grandfather I never had. He took off his shades and his eyes were a creamy blue and his smile wonderful.

The woman continued to sing from wherever she was.

“
You take my self, you take my self control
You got me living only for the night
Before the morning breaks, the story's told
You take my self, you take my self control...”

 “What's your name?” I asked.

“Dues Ex Machina. The ghost in the machine, the man that solves all problems before they become a problems. And a man that resolves all problems once they get out of control.”

The Ferries Wheel moves dream-like, very slow. “How come I never heard of you?”

Another night, another day rolls by
I never stop myself to ponder why
You help me to forget to play my role
You take my self, you take my self control...”

 He shrugged. “Listen to that cute black friend of yours. She's right. Get out more,

search the world. Read, write, learn more than just what you accept at face value kid. Quit waiting around for the next huge movie or the next huge book and do something with your life. All in all...get out from under that rock ya lazy bum.”  He chuckled.

I nodded. “That's fair. Maybe my Avirgent powers will help.”

“What powers?”

“My Avirgent powers. I could hear people whispering from twenty stories high, and I levitated Joey Two-Tone's crew in mid-air.”

“No you didn't. I did all of that stuff.”

“What?”

“Yeah. I put this...” He took out a small microphone from behind my ear, and I gasped,
astonished. “...behind your ear. And as for that Houdini trick, I did that too. That whole Avirgent thing...it's bullshit. It's just a random result Jeanine has...or used to have to weed out several thousand kids so the economy doesn't become cluttered.”

“Oh...” I said with fascination and wonder. “Well...why did you save me?”

 He smiled slyly. “I am the ghost in the machine. I save all, and I help all.”

He put his glasses back on. “You know, people also call me an 'Ass-pull,' but I tend to ignore them. Anyway, you have a great night kid.”

He took out an umbrella and opened it up. He floated out of the cart and into the night-sky, waving away at me. I waved goodbye back, crying.

“Bye Dues Ex Machina! I'm going to miss you!”

He  shouted, “As long as there is a problem, I will always be there for you Mika Ock! Just call my name and-”

An airplane buffeted him just before he finished, and I thought he died, but there he was, standing on top of the plane, giving me a thumbs up and smiling his bright smile.

“I'm okay! Really! Sayonara!”

The plane, along with him disappeared into the night, and I sat there on the Ferris Wheel enjoying the music and the cool wind.

I, I live among the freaks of the night
I haven't got the will to try and fight
Before a new tomorrow, so I guess I'll just believe it
That tomorrow never comes
A safe night, I'm living in the forest of my dream
I know the night is not as it would seem
I must believe in something, so I'll make myself believe it
That this night will never die
Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

That wonderful song continued to play, and was fitting to listen to at night, but the Ferris Wheel stopped with a metal groan, as if something hit it's side.

“Um!” I shouted. “Dues Ex Machina! Dues Ex...” I sensed that the first time I called for him, he wouldn't answer.

And he didn't. I stayed there on top of the Ferris Wheel for what seemed like forever, until I fell asleep...and awoke in
their
arms.

 ---

Dreams are but visions of our troubles come to life.

Said no one ever.

I found myself awake in the Tricker facility, in the old dormitory bed I was in before.

“Is she awake?” I heard a familiar voice say.

“What do you think? Her eyes are open.”

I didn't see their faces, they were blurs of white and brown, but they came clearer and clearer into focus, as if adjusting a magnifying glass.

“Christine? Hailey?” They were sitting up on my bed.

Christine smiled brightly and hugged me. “Oh! You're back! We thought you were gone forever tumbleweed!”

Hailey nibbled on a carrot and said, “I love you Mika Ock. In fact, I would love some big fat and veiny versions of Mika Ock. Wouldn't you Christine?”

Christine and I shared a look, and she said, “Honey, I think one Mika Ock is enough. No one else deserves such a terrible name.”

I just blinked back and forth, sitting up in my seat, and I looked toward the door to where Al died. “Was it a dream?”

Christine and Hailey answer me by looking at the door and frowning.

“Afraid not tumbleweed,” said Christine in a sad tone. “Bugs Bunny over here had to clean up her own brother. Total wreck.”

Hailey looked down, smiling, unlike the sad, sobbing wretch I saw her as before.

“I gave him a proper burial. He was the love of my life.” She shed not one tear, I would guess she had already shed them all before.

“How did you guys find me?”

“Joey Two-Tone's crew and Jeanine's waged war after you supposedly died. It was all on the news until the war just  disappeared into thin air, and we saw you and some guy in shades on a Ferries Wheel.”

 Christine bit her lip. “I thought I was in some hallucinogenic induced dream when he floated in the sky with the umbrella. What was he, Mary Poppin's son?”

“No. He called himself, 'Dues Ex Machina.'”

“What?” said Christine, baffled.

“Yeah. He said it meant, 'The ghost in the-”

“No. I know what it means. It's just...wow. That's so funny. His name was Dues freakin' Machina.”

“You know of him?”

“Not the guy, but the term.” Christine brushed her hair away, positioned herself steadier on the bed.

 “It's a phrase used for when something saves the main character or their world all of a sudden. It's literally like God interfering in the action and saving you. Or you just gaining new powers out of the blue, powers that weren't built up or foreshadowed and it saves you. It's usually used when a lazy author doesn't have the patience to think of a logical way out, or to just end their story cause they're sick of it.”