Draw Me In (24 page)

My
only hope was that he was ready, too.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

I
cried as I read the letter again.

I
wasn
’
t
a crier. That honestly just wasn
’
t
me. But I couldn
’
t
help it. I mean, seriously, a deceased mother professing her love to her son
from beyond the grave? That could either go the route of hauntingly morbid, or
beautifully tragic, and I definitely thought it veered the latter direction.
Shakespearian type stuff.

I
was slipping the envelope back into the drawer in the nightstand when there was
a knock on my bedroom door.

I
knew who it would be, but that didn
’
t
stop the desire to race over and deadbolt the lock, slide the hefty armoire in
front, and barricade the entrance to my room with every article of furniture
inside. If I had the physical strength to do it, I would have at least
attempted to wedge the high back chair under the handle.

Yesterday
had been great. Leo and I messed around with the slingshot for a bit more, did
another sampling of the Carducci wine
—
this
time from the barrels in their storerooms as Gio explained the tannins and
notes in greater detail and accuracy than I had the night before
—
and we all shared a
gorgeous vineyard dinner, enjoying one another
’
s company and the breathtaking
landscape as the sun lowered in the sky.

It
made me feel a bit like a ninety-year-old lady, but I actually excused myself
to
“
retire
”
early, immediately following our
supper. I needed to catch up on my beauty sleep. Today was scheduled to be a
big one. A photo-shoot with Ian and my first attempt at designing the Carducci
Chianti Classico label. I hadn
’
t
been on my game yesterday
—
other
than my slingshot miracle
—
and
I wanted to prove my worth today.

That
knock sounded again and I shrugged my shoulders to my ears with each thrust
against the door. I couldn
’
t
very well pretend I didn
’
t
hear it.

I
walked forward and opened it quickly before I could change my mind and attempt
to tie my sheets together in a fabric ladder and lower myself from my window.

“
Good morning, Sofia.
”

“
Good morning, Julie.
”
Her teeth were perfect. I hadn
’
t brushed mine. We were off to a
fabulous start.
“
Are
you ready?
”

“
As ready as a turkey on Thanksgiving
morning.
”

Sofia
cocked a perfectly manicured brow and tucked her chin into her slender neck.
She, in fact, was almost birdlike.
“
I
don
’
t
understand that one.
”
The accent was too much. She
’
d
be plenty irresistible without that additional charm tacked on there.
“
Let
’
s go to the vanity, yes?
”

No.
If she were asking an actual question, that would have been my answer. But this
was obviously rhetorical. I wondered what questions I could add a
“
yes?
”
to in order to make it seem like I
was purely talking to myself.

‘
It
’
s
nice having fake boobs, yes?
’
or
‘
Leo
is a good lover, yes?
’

I
couldn
’
t
pull it off, so I didn
’
t
even try.

“
Ian said to go for a natural look,
yes?
”

Yes,
yessity, yes! Enough with the yes-ing.

I
just nodded and smiled. Nod and smile. Nod and smile. I could handle this. I
flipped on the robot switch within me.

But
what I couldn
’
t
handle was how terribly endearing Sofia was as she took my hand and pulled me
toward the bathroom. I think there was a skip in her step even, and that
startled me because 1.) I thought she was a runner, and 2.) Ex-fianc
é
es didn
’
t go skipping through rooms with
current girlfriends of said ex-fianc
é
e.

Maybe
she didn
’
t
know there was anything going on between Leo and me. Was this the time to share
that information? Was it appropriate to fill her in on the fact that her past
near-husband had swapped saliva with me in this very room just two nights
prior?

Figuring
she would be using a tool on my eyelashes that alarmingly resembled a medieval
torture device in a matter of minutes, I bit my tongue and shut my lips.

Which
was appropriate because Sofia quickly swept in and began coating them with
several frosted shades of gloss prior to settling on a dusky rose colored one.

“
Bellissima.
”

She
puckered her own lips and made a smacking sound that caused me to jump because
it reminded me of our kiss back during our initial meeting. It was a miracle
that this woman didn
’
t
find me to be an utter fool. But for all I knew, she probably did. Only she,
unlike me, was able to mask that emotion.

And
that
’
s
what she continued to do as she masked my face with layers of foundation,
blush, and bronzer, shadowing and highlighting on my skin much like I did in my
drawing classes. Watching Sofia make me over made me realize there really was
an art to something like this, and she was exceptionally skilled at it. It was
hard not to like someone that made you look pretty.

“
All done.
”

She
swiveled my chair around.

“
Wow, Sofia.
”
I did not look like a clown. Nor a
drag queen. Not even a zombie. I looked like myself, just taken to the next
level. The natural way she
’
d
brought out my beauty made me want to squeeze her. So I did.

Standing
up, I drew her into a boa constrictor embrace, my arms snaking around her, and
I mumbled against her soft cheek,
“
I
can
’
t
believe you made me look like this!
”

Sofia
giggled.
“
I
didn
’
t
do much. You are very beautiful already, Julie.
”
Being told you were beautiful in an
accent like hers made it sound even prettier.
“
You and Leo are going to look
fabulous together for the shoot with Ian today.
”

So
maybe she did know about us. Or maybe not. It was hard to tell from that
statement.

“
You make a beautiful couple.
”

Okay.
She definitely knew.

“
So did you.
”

Well
that was an awkward thing to say.

Sofia
’
s cheeks reddened more than my blush
slathered ones and she lowered her head to busy herself with the task of
packing away the makeup cluttering the counter.

“
I
’
m sorry. That was weird.
”

“
No.
”
Her eyes lifted to mine.
“
It
’
s okay, Julie. Leo and I had a past.
But what
’
s
in the past is past.
”

I
supposed that was a true assertion, with all of those
‘
pasts
’
repeated in there. A rose is a rose
is a rose. But the way she didn
’
t
look up again and instead nervously fumbled with the eyeliner pencil made me
think otherwise. It felt like there was still some very real, tangible present
emotion.

“
How long were you together?
”

“
Six years.
”
That was much longer than I had
figured.
“
We
started officially dating on his sixteenth birthday. We
’
d flirted for a few months before
that, but that was the day he finally told me how he felt.
”

To
have reread Leo
’
s
fifteenth birthday letter just moments before, and then to hear they started a
relationship just a year later made me feel like Marty McFly and I
’
d just taken a whirl in the DeLorean.
I
’
d gone back and forth between the
past and the future at breakneck speed and couldn
’
t make sense of our current moment in
time. All blurring dates and flashing memories.

I
stared at Sofia, thinking of what they must have looked like during their
teenage years. Those visions had Prom King and Queen written all over them.
What cuties they were.

“
So you lived in the states too?
”

Sofia
shook her head.
“
No.
I was still in Switzerland then.
”

Switzerland?
I
’
d taken her for an Italian with the
accent and the fact that we were actually in Italy. Why hadn
’
t those ginormous Alps kept her away?

“
It was a long distance relationship.
Which was hard.
”

I
could only imagine. I had a hard enough time maintaining relationships within
my own zip code.

“
We dated for six years. When Leo
called it off, it was long overdue. I
’
d
ruined things well before that.
”

That
demanded some clarification.
“
How
’
d you ruin things?
”

“
I cheated.
”

My
hand flew up to face level like I was a marionette, controlled by some other
force. It begged to slap her, which took me by surprise because I was usually
more of a
make love not war
type of
person. But the thought of someone cheating on a person like Leo apparently
made me react in ways I wasn
’
t
used to. I couldn
’
t
imagine breaking that man
’
s
heart. All I
’
d
wanted from the moment I saw him was to own just a little piece of it.

“
You cheated on Leo?
”
I dropped my hand back to my side
and slid it into my pocket, scolding it as I balled it tightly into a fist.
Blood pumped through my clenched fingers, itching them.

“
Life can be hard. And sometimes
relationships require more work than you are able to give.
”
I guessed so, but that quite
honestly just sounded like a cop-out.
“
Leo
is more complex than most people think. He
’
s
hard to get to know, Julie. Even after six years, I felt like we still had so much
to learn about one another.
”

I
forced my hand to relax as I channeled the anger away from it.
“
To me, that honestly doesn
’
t sound like a problem.
”
I wiggled my fingers out, shaking
them loose, trying to gain control over my body again. It was mine, but why did
I feel like someone else right now?
“
I
think the problem would actually occur when you realized there was nothing new
left to discover.
”

Sofia
shrugged indifferently, much like how I assumed she acted during their
relationship. I could totally see the Swiss in her now. She had that
noncommittal neutrality of Switzerland written all over her.

“
For whatever reason,
”
she began, now face to face with me.
All of the makeup was tucked back into the bags and she had no other physical
task to distract her from our conversation.
“
I cheated. After four years, I couldn
’
t do it anymore.
”

“
But I thought you were together for
six.
”