Elizabeth Basque - Medium Mysteries 01 - Echo Park (10 page)

Michael took another power boost and I nodded for him to continue.

“I gave Renee a huge scare when I did some bad heroin with a customer. It was cut with something awful and I was sick, sick, sick, for a couple of days. I had to call 9-1-1 for the customer and requested the paramedics. Before they came, I ran home, crawling the last block or two on my hands and knees. Renee was torn between her need to have this amazing expensive, fun lifestyle with me, and the reality that this stuff can actually kill you.”

Mack’s brows furrowed. He was intent on Michael’s story and very moved. When Michael paused, Mack nodded at him to continue. He did.

“One night, I went out to do business. Renee was staying with the girls to make Halloween costumes, and after they went to bed, she went through my stuff. Her plan was to find my stash and kit, confront me and make me stop dealing and using. You can’t hide drug use very well from your girlfriend. She knew me to the core and we were close to becoming…physically closer.”

Julie heaved a sigh. My heart was breaking for him, too, but I didn’t show it.

Michael continued, “She’d found my stash and she was curious. She smoked a little from a pipe. She told me that after the initial vomiting, it was a really nice high, and wouldn’t I please give her a little more? After everything she did for me?”

Julie leaned forward, her eyes anxious.

Michael kept on, like we had turned on a faucet and he was unable to stop until we had the whole story poured from his gut. “I was angry and upset that she had gone through my stuff and even more angry that she used some of my stash. I had to account for what I used. Scale-perfect transactions. Plus, I had my own little habit going by then. It was under control, I thought. I wanted to be with her. She wanted my heroin and was hinting just how far she would go to get more of it.” He sniffled and looked at Carla.

“
I was a street kid, Michael. I understand that she tried to trade you sex for more heroin.”

“
Yes, and I loved her so much that I couldn’t deny her anything, not even that. It didn’t take long. Almost immediately, Renee was an addict, through and through. And also, just like that, we became lovers. She started out smoking it, then sniffing it, then skin popping it. Barely a month had passed when I came home to find her passed out with a needle stuck in her arm. I panicked, but she was alive, just really out of it for a day. Thank God, my sisters hadn’t seen that, or my dad.”

Mack shook his head sadly.

“When she woke up, I told Renee I would no longer supply her habit. I would help her through withdrawal, help her find a job or go back to high school. She had dropped out before she even met me. I would do anything for her, anything but supply her. I told her I loved her and promised I would always take care of her, that we could have a good life, only if she never did
H
again.”

He moaned. “Renee agreed at first. I quit dealing, and I quit school. I turned sixteen and got a job stocking shelves at a super-store, working graveyard shifts. I quit using because my job had regular drug tests. I knew she was clean because I wasn’t her supplier anymore. I was with her all the time, except when I was working while she slept at my house in my bed, so my little sisters wouldn’t be there all alone. My dad was now on graveyards, too, at his job. We were all so glad to have Renee there for the girls. So glad. I was always so dead-tired when I got home from work at 8 a.m. that she even took my sisters to school for me. She did so much for us while Dad and I snored away in our beds. Another American family falls victim to shiftwork. And worse.”

“So, you were on your way to living happily ever after with Renee?” Julie asked.

Michael shook his head. “No, she dumped me by text message. She said she wanted to be free and have fun and that I should call her when I was ready to return to our old life.”

“Wow,” Julie said. “I’m sorry. Continue, please.”

“
And by ‘old life,’ she meant she wanted to party with
H
and have lots of money again,” Carla guessed. “So you went back to it.”

“
I see you know the drill.”

Chapter Sixteen

“
My heart was hurting so much without Renee.”

He took another power boost and spoke on, like he couldn’t stop now. “She kept texting me, challenging me to quit my job. When I called her back, she pleaded. She begged. Finally, she gave me an ultimatum. She told me if I didn’t go back to the old life, she was going to try to get my old dealer job. She gave me one week to decide.”

“Oh,” I said, shocked.

“
I was bad off. I didn’t have H and I didn’t have her. I had a job stocking shelves and working graveyards for minimum wage. I was becoming my old man, a bitter, lonely high school dropout and a minimum wage worker with no skills, no future. My dreams were crushed every day when I clocked into my job, yet the woman I loved was going to become a heroin dealer if I didn’t quit that job and go back to running drugs, myself, and of course, doing them.”

Tears were running down his ghost face. “She had no street smarts. Inside of two days, she would have either gotten herself arrested or killed in a drug deal. If I was going to save Renee, I had to go back to the life. It was her or me.”

He wiped his ghost nose on his sleeve, even though he wasn’t really wet. “It took me one day to decide and within two days, my old suppliers were more than happy to welcome me back into the drug scene. Renee and I got back together the first night, after my welcome-back delivery.”

I sighed, deflated by the outcome.

“My sisters were glad, too, that Renee was back. We had all missed her, even Dad. After just two weeks back at selling – - but not using, because by then I knew if I used again, that would be my downfall—I almost had enough money for an engagement ring. I got cocky. I even asked for bigger drug deals. Ask, and ye shall receive. Right?”

“
Right,” I said, knowing this was all going south pretty soon. Not that
that
bus hadn’t already left.

“
So, at that point, I was thinking about taking her ring shopping and I was whistling to myself as I knocked on my supplier’s door; we had a special knock-knock code for each dealer so the supplier would know who was at the door and it was all very secure. I was even stashing the engagement ring money in his safe, to which I had the combination, too. That’s how much he and I trusted each other. Pretty brotherly of the guy, right?”

Mack groaned.

Michael continued, “Then it all went downhill. When I tapped my knuckles on the door, it swung ajar. That was a bad sign. I shouldn’t have gone in, but I did. My guy was out like a light. Not dead, but seriously messed up, the needle in his arm. I pulled it out and scoped out the place. The safe was open, the ring money was gone. And so was the drug stash.”

“
Were the drugs fronted to your supplier?” Carla asked, as if she knew all the workings of drug dealing.
Well, she did.

“
Oh, yeah. There was going to be hell to pay. Death, really, was imminent, probably that night. I had maybe two hours to recover my life before someone came looking for me and killed me, after my supplier told them my name. Because they would get it out of him. He didn’t have the real thieves, but any fall guy will do in a pinch, as long as it’s not
you
.”

Michael wrung his hands. “Fighting panic, I threw ice water on my connection’s face and slapped him until he came around. The dude told me the last thing he remembered: an old friend, a mother and her child, had visited, begging for a chance to score, and also start making money again. She had smooth-talked him, telling him things no one should ever say in front of a daughter.”

Michael looked at Carla apologetically. Her lips shook.

Michael pressed on. “He’d believed her, though, and took the bait. Then, the woman and her child were gone with the money and the heroin. And our supplier was set to come over that night to collect on the daily sales. We were completely screwed. ‘We gotta get out of here!’ I yelled, trying to help him up.”

Carla’s chin trembled. Julie stroked her hair, or thereabouts.

“
My supplier flipped open his switchblade, lightning-quick for such a druggie who had been almost unconscious a few minutes before. He threatened me, ‘If I go down,
you
go down! Now, go find that bitch and get me back my money. And the dope, too, or you’ll be sorry. I’m not taking the fall for this.”

Michael took a power boost and kept unraveling the tale. “He gave me a list of places to look for her, and when he described her to me, the woman and her child, I knew exactly who he was talking about. I had to go after her. I was trapped, see? I could run, but if I did, they would go right to my house and kill Renee and the girls. I had to just do this one last thing for him, my supplier, and then I would find another way to earn Renee’s heart and her longtime commitment. Because drug dealing was too damn hard.”

He swallowed. “Now the lives of my girlfriend and my sisters hung in the balance. And my dad, too, if he was home when they showed up looking for me. I could lose my whole family in one fell swoop. So, I didn’t run. I went looking for the woman who had scammed my supplier.”

A little whimper came out of Carla. I could feel her fear. Julie held her, as much as one can hold a ghost. Michael looked at Carla sadly and then back at me.

“I told my supplier I had no weapon, and I never had needed one, or used one. He handed me a gun, and a tiny fix. I told myself, just this once. To calm down. Do what I gotta do. Just a little bit. After I did it, I realized it was some really bad heroin, like it had been stepped on with something unexpected. I barely felt good after I did it.”

He shuddered and I could feel his revulsion at himself.

“Don’t stop, Michael,” I said. “You’re almost there.”

He nodded. “It took me an hour to find the mom and daughter. Echo Park is not that big. I knew their hangouts, had seen her around on the street, but I couldn’t find her. I asked around and you know, the actual hiding place became known to me and I went right there. Street people will tell you anything for a tiny hit of crappy H done in an alley.” He paused, getting to the hard part.

“Coming down off of heroin makes people irritable, irrational, and paranoid. It’s not an excuse, just a fact. I was shaking because I was so relieved to see them, knowing they probably still had the money and the heroin since they weren’t in a cheap motel with the mom getting her fix. Finding her meant that I would live, Renee would live, my sisters would live, and I would be able to marry Renee with the money for the engagement ring recovered and we would live happily ever after. All these better scenarios went through my mind. I ran up to them as they were trying to jimmy the door and I saw…the daughter, Carla, begging, pleading with her mother to leave.”

Michael’s jaw trembled. “I saw you, Carla. Scared out of your wits. The gun. I didn’t even know how to use it, aim it, nothing. But your mom, Carla, she put her hands over your eyes and the reason you don’t remember is because you didn’t see. She put her body in front of yours and covered your eyes and when I shot her, the bullets went through her and into you, too. I didn’t know that could happen. Sorry. Sorry.
Sorry
.”

His mouth worked back and forth and he finally stopped talking. He just sat there on the floor, and looked down. He didn’t have the nerve to meet anyone’s eyes. Not Mack’s, not mine or Julie’s. Especially not young Carla’s.

I didn’t even know what to say. You heard similar stories all the time in Los Angeles, but this really hit home. It always did when it was this personal. Julie was weeping again, and Carla was awestruck with horror.

Mack wanted to leave, as he never could handle too much emotion. But he stayed, to support me and Carla, I knew. He wavered in and out, upset.

I had to do something, say something. It was my job. “Thank you, Michael. And, I’m so sorry.”

“
After I…you know…” He risked a glance at Carla, his eyes haunted and guilty. “I lost it after I did that to you and your mom. I couldn’t believe what I’d done. And it was all for money. Money for Renee.”

“
And to save your family from getting wiped out by drug dealers in retaliation for the thefts,” Mack said, understanding. And then he was quiet, thoughtful.

“
You still haven’t told us how
you
died,” I ventured. Better to get this done, painful though it was.

“
I took the stash and the money from your mom,” he spoke to Carla now. “I ripped the bags of heroin open and let them blow in the wind. Almost all of it.”

“
Huh?” I found myself saying.

“
Then I went down the hill with the money. I threw it all out, into the streets. I gave wads of cash away to homeless people. And single mothers. I tried to give most of it to single mothers. Because of what I’d just done. People started following me, because everyone wanted some money. It disgusted me, and I finally just threw my backpack, with all of the money, onto the sidewalk. Nobody followed me after that. They got what they wanted, right?”

He was starting to shimmer and fade, faster than Carla or Mack were. He was using more energy, from the story he’d just told. He touched the remote. It didn’t work as well, maybe because he was tired and because he had worn down the batteries.

“I knew what I had to do,” he went on quietly. “I knew I could never make Renee happy. I was a monster—I’d just put bullets into a mother and daughter without any hesitation, just so I could get the bag of money and dope. How could I ever tell her what I did? I knew my future with Renee was destroyed. And I was in shock. I’d never killed anyone before, never even held a gun.”

He managed to toy with a lighter lying on my coffee table, spinning it around on its side. “I was alone, now that I had no money left.” He looked up at us. “I didn’t have the money, I didn’t have the stash. And I didn’t have Renee.”

We waited; this was hard for him. His voice was so tiny now, like that of a hurt child. That’s really what he was, I realized. He’d never even had the chance to grow up after his mother had died.

“
So,” he forced the words to come out of his mouth, “I took what I’d kept of the heroin and found an empty alley. I didn’t see any other way out. How selfish. I still visit my sisters to this day. They don’t see me, though.”

Julie gasped. “You didn’t…”

“I did,” Michael replied. “I sat down in the back of a dark alley, and I made myself the biggest dose that would fit in the needle. I made it strong.”

Carla listened, trying to stay calm. She was a child of the streets, too. She was probably more used to these stories than the rest of us. But I could tell she’d never considered the “other side of the story” before, especially from her own murderer. She was mesmerized, hanging on his every word.

“I forgot to mention that I picked up some Pepto Bismol somewhere along the way. Anyway, I drank some of that first, because sometimes it stops you from upchucking.” He drew in a big ghostly sigh and let it out. “And then, I did it.” He looked down at his shirt. “I guess I threw up anyway, but it was too late.”

“
You killed yourself,” Julie muttered.

“
Yes.” Michael leaned forward to Carla. “I’m so, so sorry. I’m sorry for what I did to you and your mother. I know I can never make up for it, but maybe this whole messed-up tale of truth will give you closure, for…you know…something better than being a ghost.”

Carla groped for words, but none came.

“So, that’s what that vinegar smell is? When you’re around, I can smell it,” Julie said.

Michael nodded.

“Michael,” I asked gently, “Did you see anything when you passed into the spirit world?”

“
You mean like a big white light?” He was bitter now. “Like my life passing before me, and angels coming down to get me and bring me to Heaven? No. I didn’t see that. I rose up, looked down on my body, twitching, foaming from the mouth, the needle still in my arm. And I left. My spirit did part from my body and
here I stay
.”

This was some heavy shit. And for me, it was disturbing that no one had come to greet him. I’d never known that to happen. I figured it could only mean one thing. I shuddered. It was the worst. The light didn’t come for him. I wanted to soothe Michael, somehow give him peace. And not let on that I was pretty sure of his fate.

And God, selfish as it was, I needed a drink. A drink and a smoke.

Chapter Seventeen

“
Michael, your story is amazing,” I told him. “Thank you. Thank you for being so honest and open.”

He just looked down again, and nodded.

Carla left Julie’s side and moved over, sitting next to him. “I don’t know what to say,” she whispered. “I thought my life was bad.
Dude
…”

“
You don’t need to say anything.” He deliberately looked away from her. “You wanted me here, and Mack made me come. I told you my story. I did what I did. I’m paying for it. I’m going to always pay for it. But you don’t have to, Carla. Your business on Earth, it’s done, little innocent girl.”

Julie held on tight to Carla.
Oh no…

Now he glanced up at me. “I know why you asked if I saw anything…the light. That’s what’s supposed to happen. But not for me. I killed two innocent people, and I killed myself. Two mortal sins. No, three. I’ve accepted my fate. I
deserve
my fate.”

Was it true? I wondered. I took joy in helping dead souls, helping them to move on. To take a step up those stairs, and go Home. The fact that he never had that chance was upsetting, to say the least. It put quite a hole in what I believed about the light.

“Michael,” I said after a moment, “I want you to know that I’ve never met a soul who didn’t have a chance. It may look like that to you now, but…”

“
No.” Michael rose now. “Look, I’m sorry for what I did. I will be sorry forever. I did what you asked. I came here to tell you what happened. To release Carla because it isn’t fair for her to suffer like this.” He gave Mack a pleading look. “Can’t I just leave now? Please?”

Mack’s demeanor was dead serious. He didn’t ask my permission, he just nodded at the boy, the young man who was still a boy, to follow him.

They faded through my door.

Julie and I smoked our cigarettes inside. She couldn’t see Carla out of doors, so I decided to break my own smoking rule for the second time that week.

“
Oh, my God,” Julie said again. That was the only thing she’d said since Michael and Mack left. “You were so right, Pauline. Two sides to every story. I mean, how would I have ever known?”

Carla remained quiet, not too upset, but rather preoccupied.

I didn’t know what Julie was expecting, but it wasn’t this. None of us expected this. We were, I thought, imagining their killer to be some cruel, coldhearted gang member just randomly taking out Carla and her mother as random victims for some gang initiation or something. Even that was judgmental, I chided myself. Everyone had a life story that intersected with someone else’s life story.

Julie stubbed out her cigarette and lit another one. “He’s so alone,” she uttered.

“Well, for what it’s worth, he’s got Mack.”

At this last comment, Julie wrinkled her nose a little. “Who is Mack, anyway?” she asked me.

I waved a hand. “He’s a spirit. He’s lost, in some way, but he doesn’t talk about it. He likes to hang around me because I can see him. He’s been coming to see me for a year or so now.” I felt a slight pang of guilt at this explanation for Mack. He’d kept me company on many a night when I would have otherwise been alone. And recently, he’d done some pretty nice things for me. Like bringing Carla. And now, Michael. I hoped he would stay with Michael for a while, wherever they’d gone to talk. Michael’s story brought me so much sorrow. And confusion. Why, indeed, had no greeter of light come for him when he’d died?

“
Because he’s not finished yet,” Carla suddenly said. She was good at reading my thoughts. “He’s still got work to do.”

“
Sweetheart,” I said, “there are many who don’t finish what they’re meant to do when they pass. That’s why they come back.”

But Julie and I watched as Carla rose up into the air, obviously excited.

“But he really wasn’t finished,” she declared. “I mean, he has a specific
mission
. And maybe, he couldn’t fulfill that mission while he was still alive.”

“
What do you mean?” Julie asked.

“
You’ve got to get him back here.” Carla drew near to me. She still had the joy of a child sometimes. Now was one of those times. “Bring him back. You’ve got to bring him back.”

“
What?” Julie asked, incredulous. “You’re crazy, Carla. I’m pretty new to this, but even I could tell Michael doesn’t ever want to come back here.”

“
She’s right, hon,” I agreed. “I really don’t blame him, either.”

Carla was shocked. “I thought it was your job to help people? Like, help dead people.”

“It is,” I admitted. “But I’ve never met anyone who hasn’t even been
offered
the stairs of Heaven before.”

“
Well, that’s because he’s not ready,” Carla stated.

Julie asked, “How do you know?”

“I’m not sure. I just know. And I want to help him.”

“
Maybe if you told me…us…your idea, Carla.”

But she shook her head. “No, I have to talk with
him
. Call him back. Please?”

I recognized determination in Carla’s face and sighed. When had I lost control of this séance? I rolled my eyes.

“Mack!” I hollered, as if he were just in the next room and I was calling him for lunch. He did respond to my calling. Sometimes. “Mack!”

We waited. Waited a little more. I called for Mack. I tried to connect with him mentally. Nothing.

It was early afternoon now. Julie was exhausted, I could tell. And, although I had a job to do, I could do with a little rest.

Carla had disappeared from Julie’s sight, but Julie could tell she was still around, mostly because I was still talking to the girl.

“I don’t think they’re coming,” I finally told her.

Julie yawned outright. “Carla, let’s give him a break,” she said, looking straight at Carla though she didn’t realize it. “Let’s go home.”

But Carla would have none of it. “You go home, Jules, I can tell you’re tired.” Julie seemed to catch this thought. Amazing. “And, Pauline, I can tell you want a…nap.” She was going to say “drink,” I just knew it. Bless her soul. “I’ll go find him. I know where he chills.”

No pun intended. I kept a straight face.

Carla swept over and gave Julie a quick hug, which made Julie smile. To me, she said, “I’ll be back. Don’t worry about me. Tell
her
not to worry.” Carla gestured to Julie, then disappeared.

I closed my apartment door, having agreed with Julie that whoever saw Carla or Michael first would call the other.

Leaning against my side of the door, I realized I was more tired than I’d been in a long time. Helluva day. “And it’s only half over,” I muttered, looking up to the Heavens. “Just a little rest, okay?” I asked to whoever might be listening. The grand Puppet Master in the sky.

“Just one drink,” I still spoke aloud, justifying to the Puppet Master. And myself. I was tense, I needed to relax. A drink, a cigarette, and then a well-earned nap. I wished I could put up a “Do Not Disturb” sign, lest Mack appear to wake me.

Two drinks later, I curled up on the couch, my feet tucked under, and adjusted the pillows. I fell asleep instantly.

Chapter Eighteen

Thump.

“
Shhhh…”

Clank.

I was still on the couch, but I moaned as I realized I was no longer alone, and my slumber had indeed been interrupted.

“
Shhhh…” It was clearly Carla, who was trying to be respectful. Mack—for I knew it was Mack who’d made the thump by overturning my large chair, like he always did, and clanked my ashtray on the coffee table—apparently, no longer felt he owed me any grace.

I opened one eye, spied them both watching me, waiting for me to wake up. “You could have just called my name,” I said grumpily. I stretched my arms and legs. My right arm, which had been comfy under my pillow, was now tingling from lack of circulation.

“Crap.” I sat up, shook my head for clarity, and began opening and closing my hand. I hated when that happened, when my arm fell asleep along with my mind. It happened more frequently now, but I ignored these symptoms as poor circulation, probably due to lack of exercise.