Ellie's Advice (sweet romance) (11 page)

Shel adjusted his
yarmulke, though he'd already fixed it at least six times. He regarded himself worriedly in the mirror. The dark suit was presentable, unwrinkled, and clean. His hair was cropped short and neat, tamed further by the yarmulke. If only he could tame his harried frown so easily.

This will be all right. Nothing is going to go wrong!

His brother was here as his best man, inside a synagogue for the first time in years. His sister and her husband were here as well, despite normally going to a much more orthodox synagogue. His rabbi and his friends had reassured him it was normal to feel a bit anxious.

But he didn't feel anxious
. He was petrified.

He straightened his cuffs again, took a big breath and
huffed it out loudly.
I am all right. We love each other, and nothing — nothing — will go wrong.

Ellie's family hadn't been too certain about Shel at first, but had seemed to accept him quickly, once they saw how happy Ellie was. His own relatives had varied in their reactions, but everyone had come to accept Ellie, at least enough to come to the wedding and welcome her to the family.

He'd been looking forward to this day for so long, so why was he absolutely terrified now that it had actually come?

"Shel!" shouted someone. "Come qu
ick! Your fiancée has fainted!"

He hurried out of the changing room. Here he was, nearly ready, and she
—

Toward the back of the spacious, airy synagogue slumped a slender figure in white.
Ellie.
Several women and a few awkward-looking men gathered around her. Grace Goldman, Ellie's sister-in-law, was lifting her up, fanning her with one hand. "Someone, a doctor!" she called.

No. This is not happening. Not on our wedding! Not to my Ellie!

He was barely aware of running. "W-What happened?"

"She just collapsed." Mrs. Goldman
looked up at him with tearstained eyes. "We were talking about how lucky she felt, and — and she collapsed."

"Her heart," said Ellie's brother, the egg-shaped
Augustus Goldman. "She's always had a weak heart." He looked pale and frightened at seeing his sister slumped on the floor like this. His hands fluttered ineffectually.

"I know. Somebody
call a doctor." Shel knelt by his bride-to-be, taking her hand, staring into her pale, still face. "Ellie? It's me." He patted her wrist. "Can you hear me?"

"Give her ai
r! Give her air!" demanded Shel's mother, pushing people back. "The poor girl."

Someone uncorked smelling salts and passed them quickly under Ellie's nose.

Her eyelashes fluttered and she gasped in a breath. "Shel?" Her hand squeezed in his, and she opened her gentle green eyes, staring up at him, looking lost, confused, and embarrassment.

"You're all right," he hurried to reassure her.
"You collapsed. I think we'd better postpone—"

"No!" She tried to struggle to her feet. Her sister-in-law made clucking sounds, holding onto her
gently, and at last Ellie settled back with a frown. "I'm sure I'm well enough. I just felt… so dizzy." She reached up to touch her forehead, frowning.

"We should have your heart checked," he said as calmly as he could. "Do you have your doctor's number handy?"

What if she wasn't healthy enough? Oh, what if he'd done this to her? He'd already lost one wife, and now he might be losing the woman he loved before they were even wed!

"Of course I do, but…" Her pale brow furrowed and she bit her lower lip. Faint color tinged her cheeks.
"Oh dear. I can't believe I've been so foolish. In all the rushing around, I forgot to eat!"

A collective sigh of relief went up from the audience.

"I'm — I'm so
very
sorry!"

"Nonsense," said Shel. "Some
body find her something to eat."

He knelt on the floor, clasping her
hands, smiling down at her with great affection. "I'm sorry you fainted. I'll take care of you from now on, I promise."

She wrinkled her nose, smiling reluctantly up at him. "
You goose. We'll take care of each other!"

*

Shel put on a record. One of his favorites, a nice, slow, smooth jazz record. He swayed lightly to the music, closing his eyes.

They had opted to go righ
t to her home after the wedding, to check on the dogs, send them home for the night with Mrs. Fine, and then spend a few quiet days together. Ellie was not strong enough to travel right now. Perhaps she never would be. But the small apartment held all the honeymoon he would ever need. All he ever wanted in life.

Shel
had tried pleasing his family when he was younger. That hadn't worked, and it hadn't made him happy. He'd tried ambition, pushing himself recklessly at his job until he earned the position he most wanted, that of editor. And that hadn't worked, either. The job had come with challenges, and he'd begun to miss reporting at times. Most of all, it simply hadn't left him with the wonderfully fulfilled feeling he'd thought it would.

No, there would always be challenges. And he went into this marriage with his eyes wide open, knowing Ellie would need to be careful of her health all her life
, and even so probably wouldn't live as long as Shel.

But their days together
would be worth living, every single one of them. They were together now, and he had never felt so right within his own skin, so settled and joyous and alive. No matter what, they had each other. And that made every day look like a treasure, instead of a gray burden to be muddled through doing the best he could and wondering why he could never stop feeling restless.

There was not an ounce of restlessness in him today.

They'd agreed Ellie should lie down a bit and recover her strength after the wedding, before they spent any more time together. To be honest, he didn't expect her to be up for any intimacy tonight.

That was all right. He could wait.

He'd waited all his life to be with the woman he loved with his whole heart. What was one more night?

"Shel?" asked Ellie, sounding surprisingly hesitant.

He turned, a smile blooming on his face, wide and growing wider. "Yes, my love?"

H
er cheeks were pink, and she wore a thin, dainty silken nightgown, see-through and edged with delicate lace. It looked like a cloud, light as cotton candy. And it clung deliciously to all of her most womanly features: her slender waist, the curve of hips and bosom, and her pale, beautiful shoulders. Oh, my. The room was suddenly much warmer.

He took a step forward, couldn't help himself.

"Ellie." His voice came out hoarse and husky. He cleared his throat, feeling as if his hands had suddenly become too large and too hot. "Are you… are you certain this is a good idea?"

She smiled at him, hesitantly but with such warmth in her eyes. "Oh yes, I feel much better now. And you know, I don't think I can bear waiting one moment longer. I've dreamed of you for so long…
." She blushed.

He couldn't help
the little laugh that escaped him. It was almost like hearing a stranger laugh: the happiest stranger in the world.

He
moved nearer and took her gently into his arms. She fit as if she belonged there, had belonged there forever. "My dearest. I've dreamed of you, too." He kissed her tenderly, gently, and with all the passion of his heart. Here was the woman he would be getting to know better and better for the rest of his life. He couldn't wait. He wanted to know every part of her, not just her body but her heart and her soul and her beautiful, intelligent mind.

"Oh, good," she said breathlessly when they broke apart. She gazed at him. Because they were so close in height, she didn't have to look up far. He really enjoyed that about her. Judith had been so much shorter than Shel; he really liked being with
Ellie, who made him feel like he was the right size, not too big and awkward.

Worry touched her gaze as she looked at him. "You…
you will go slowly, won't you? I mean, I've never…" She bit her lip and blushed harder.

"Of course
!
Of course
. I'd never want to rush the best thing in my life."

"You have been married before," Ellie reminded him, as they separated en
ough to clasp hands and start for the bedroom. Her hand felt slim, elegant, and cool in his grasp. She held his hand tightly.

"
And I'll always be sorry I couldn't be a better husband to her," said Shel gravely. "But there could never be a comparison. I love you," he said simply. "And that makes all the difference."

"Even if I'm not very good?"
She glanced at him shyly, her cheeks crimson now.

He stopped for a moment, bli
nking at her in shock. "There's no one in the world better than you. Even if we could never make love, I'd want to spend every day with you for the rest of my life. You're the most beautiful woman in the world and I love you with my whole heart. So please, don't feel like you have anything to live up to. You're already so much better than I could ever deserve—" He couldn't continue. Tears pricked at his eyes, and he coughed into his fist.

She squeezed the hand she held, a l
ook of compassion replacing her nervous expression. "My dear Shel," she said softly. "That's how I feel about you!" A faint smirk crossed her elegant features, turning her smile up slightly further. "Well, except replace 'woman' with 'man.' Now, why don't you show me how this works?"

And she moved into his arms and kissed him with all the
tenderness and passion she possessed.

*

"Shel!" called Ellie from the kitchen. "Breakfast!"

"Coming, dear!" He finished tying his tie, biting h
is lip as he concentrated on it. Then he paused to study his face in the mirror.

This
was his first day back at work since the wedding. Did he look different? Would everyone be able to see how happy he was, how perfectly right his life felt with Ellie beside him every day — and every night? If they did, his coworkers would be extremely jealous. He certainly would've been, in the old days.

They
'd decided to stay at Ellie's apartment. It was more comfortable than Shel's. To be honest, he loved it here, with all the homey little touches his wife — his wife! — had already made over the years. The dogs had already broken the furniture in quite suitably, thank you; no need to start out fresh.

Besides, although neither spoke of it, he knew the strain of moving would take a toll on Ellie, and he didn't relish seeing her pushed to the edge of exhaustion any time soon.

As it was, she'd started to cook for him on occasion, instead of letting the maid do so. And they spent every night (and sometimes part of the day) rather energetically engaged. So far her strength was holding out, but he kept an eye on her protectively, not wanting her to push herself too hard.

They'
d taken a complete break from work and also from reading any newspapers since the wedding. He found the break was doing him good, and Ellie said it didn't matter what people said about them marrying each other, if they didn't read it.

"No one can force us to read ugly things about ourselves. It says more about them than it does about us!" she'd reminded him.

He'd been unable to help laughing a little at her fierce, earnest expression, and hugged her close and kissed her. "You always do give the perfect advice," he whispered.

"Not always," she'd replied,
drawing back, her gaze twinkling at him. "Just in general."

Everything was going beautifully. Even th
e dogs were behaving better these days. Shel was finding out he was a bit better at dog training than he'd expected to be. Spending more time around the dogs, he'd begun taking them in hand. They were getting too big to be pulling on the leash all the time for Ellie. Now they were actually starting to mind; he'd even taught them to sit.

This morning,
they were no doubt sitting in the kitchen, gazing worshipfully at breakfast, hoping for a taste. They'd get it; of course they'd get it. They might be behaving better, but they were still quite spoiled half-grown dogs, all big paws, floppy ears, and happy tails.

As he finished his tie, he glanced at his hair
, tilting his head to the side, biting his lip. Was that a gray hair hiding among his curls?

Behind him, Ellie clicked her tongue. "How vain," she said in a teasing voice, just before
sliding her arms slid around his waist and hugging him close. He smiled at the warmth of her slim body against his. His beautiful, gentle, trusting, and enjoyably silly wife.

Oh, he hadn't known loving someone held such room for humor! But with their love cemented and secur
e, there was room for joking, gentle teasing, and even belly laughs together, the way there had never been room for more than polite smiles with Judith.