Erotic Refugees (17 page)

“
Nah,” Rob said. “Well,
yeah, a bit, but I'll make the after-lunch bit. I told Milly to
make up some lie for me. Women are good that way.”

“
What, at
lying?”

Rob looked up innocently and
shrugged. “Yeah. Aren't they?”

Eoin shook his head. “So who's
Milly then?”

“
Yeah, right, sorry, let
me tell ye about it!” Rob launched into the story of how they'd
met, and how talented she was, and how she'd get the whole project
in order. Eoin couldn't help narrowing his eyes as he listened. He
suspected that Rob's head was not making all the major decisions
when it came to this Milly woman.

“
Well it's good you found
somebody to help out, but, well, you have to make sure she's the
person you really need, and not just ask her to help because, well,
you want something else from her, you follow me?”

Rob gave an emphatic wink.
“Well that's the best part, ye see, cos she's gay!”

Eoin stared at Rob for a
moment. “So why,” he asked carefully, “is her being gay the best
part…?”

“
Well, so there'll be no
distractions of that type, ye know? Just straight down to work.
She'll point out the way to go and prod our arses so we'll get
there fast.”

“
Because gay women are
bossy and dominant?”

Rob looked all innocent again.
“Aren't they?”

The breakfast arrived and Eoin
was glad of the distraction. As he had suspected, it was a
boiled-egg, yogurt-muesli, small-sandwich combo. No juice though,
that was extra, and Eoin wasn't a paying-extra kind of guy. So the
basic deal would have to suffice.

“
Well that's great Rob!”
he said as he began de-capping his egg. “I mean, good work. I'm not
convinced she'll be any better just because she's gay but, you're
right, it does make things simpler. And she'll do it all, just like
that? For nothing?”

Rob gave Eoin the briefest of
looks and Eoin suspected the worst.

“
You know we can't pay
her Rob, so I hope you didn't—”

“
Oh no, she knows that.
She thinks it's interesting and it won't be much work for her. Plus
she's unemployed so she's nothing to do anyway. But it's not just
the system developer stuff, it’s the whole getting-things-going
angle. She's a tough lady, all action. She even got me to reserve
the domain—”

Eoin looked up sharply. “What
domain?”

“
Ye know, for the
site.”

Eoin blinked in disbelief.
“What? You hadn't even—”

“
Chill,” Rob said,
raising a calming hand. “No need for a hissy fit. All booked and
paid for now, in the bag so it is. All's well that ends well.
Jaysus, I'm hungry. Hang on.”

Rob headed to the counter and
got himself a breakfast. Eoin watched him and shook his head. He
was hardly able to believe that Rob had only now bought the domain
for the project they'd been working on for a month, but he was also
unwilling to argue about it this early on a Sunday. He was,
however, a little suspicious as there was something Rob wasn't
telling him here. Something about this Milly person, but he just
couldn't put a finger on what it was.

“
And,” Rob announced when
he returned with a tray. “I've even gotten a graphic designer on
board!”

“
What, Milly
again?”

“
Nah, she can't draw for
hell. It just occurred to me last night, a revelation—”

“
In the pub?” Eoin asked
dryly.

“
Come on, what kind of a
boozer d'ye think I am? No, this was after the pub, when I got
home. And it just popped into my head.” Rob did a thumbs-up with
one hand. “Karen!”

“
Your sister? Can she do
design?”

“
Sure she can, no
problem! She's been drawin' her whole life, and she's always poking
around with something on the web. She grew up with that
stuff!”

“
Fine, but that doesn't
mean she can—”

“
Eoin, relax. Just head
off to Ireland, and me and Milly will be workin' hard to get all
the basic functions done. Karen will send us some layout ideas and
when ye get back there'll be a site to look at. Sound
good?”

“
Sure, yeah, sounds
great.”

“
Of course,” Rob said as
he crammed most of a ham-and-cheese-covered roll into his mouth,
“then we have Gotland. Except there won't be any Gotland,
right?”

“
It doesn't look like it.
Andy and Alice, I just don't know what the hell's going on there,
and she won't tell me. And now we had some kind of stupid fight and
she won't talk to me at all. So no, it's not looking good for
Gotland.”

Rob sat back with a wise look
about him, and Eoin guessed that some advice was on its way. “Ye
know what to do about this Alice thing, don't ye? Just go over
there, and give her a good hard—”

“
Rob!” Eoin looked around
but the three other customers were staring into their newspapers,
devoid of expression. He turned back to Rob. “I don't think every
problem can be solved by just, you know—”

Rob raised his voice. “You mean
by sexual intercourse?” He grinned at Eoin's mortified expression.
“True, it probably caused more problems than it solved but still,
when yer havin' some kind of spat with this girl, and there's
energy in the air, well, I'm just sayin'—”

“
Drop it,” Eoin said.
“I'll get on to her when I get back to Stockholm, and then we'll
see about Gotland. But just warn Andy it's probably not going to
happen, so he's not planning, or waiting, or something.”

“
Check. I'll send ye a
text when there's something to see on the site. And chill out in
Ireland, deal?”

Eoin nodded, although he knew
there'd be little chilling out in Ireland. There was his family to
face, and his separation to explain, and battles to be fought to
stop his mother stuffing Damien with chocolate and crisps. He
always came back from his holiday in Ireland feeling like he needed
a longer holiday somewhere else.

Rob raised his coffee mug and
Eoin followed suit. They clunked them together with a sound like a
pair of ashtrays colliding. “To … to what exactly?” prompted
Eoin.

Rob thought hard for a moment
and flashed a grin. “To me finally getting off my arse?”

“
Fair enough,” Eoin said.
They banged the mugs again.

“
To Rob finally getting
off his arse!”

Chapter
19

Rob was annoyed. He had no job
to go to, the sun was blazing, it was the middle of July, and the
entire Swedish female species were walking up and down the street
outside his flat being all sultry. There were pubs to visit and
cappuccinos to be drunk and beaches to be lounged upon, and here he
was stuck indoors and working harder than he'd ever worked in his
life.

It was only Wednesday and
already Milly had called two project meetings in Rob's flat. At
each meeting it had taken about thirty minutes for them to go
through what they'd both done, pose a few questions, and set the
time for the next meeting. Not a second had been wasted and Rob was
beginning to understand that maybe, just maybe, he'd been a bit
unfocused regarding the project up to now.

Perhaps just a tad.

To make up for that, he was
working frantically through the Flash coding of the calendar
section, the meaty heart of the whole enterprise. And slowly, one
for-loop at a time, he was actually getting somewhere.

By two in the afternoon his
neck ached, his right arm was stiff and his eyes had started to
swim. He figured it was time for a break. He pulled on the least
crinkled shirt from his laundry chair, slotted his sunglasses onto
his head and headed down to the local shop for an ice-cream. After
perusing their selection, he picked the one he always picked and
headed for the water’s edge.

Rob's building was on the
western edge of Södermalm, with a slightly crappy view of an
industrial area on the other side of the water. But on a day like
this, anything looked good. He sneaked around a fence and onto the
corner of a jetty that possibly belonged to a boat club judging by
the fence, the locked gate and the large “Private” sign. Naturally
these could not possibly apply to a foreigner, so he took off his
sandals and sat down with a sigh.

He licked at his ice-cream and
watched the water as it slapped gently against the wooden supports
below. He wondered once again why he was still in Sweden. Eoin he
could understand, having a kid and a good job and an ex to fight
with, but what exactly was holding him in this country? He had no
woman in particular, no job and no family. There were Irish bars,
of course, and there was a shop that specialised in English
foodstuffs and real teabags, and other English-speaking expats to
hang around with. And all that, he accepted, was fairly good.

But if this project fell
through, and he didn't get another programming job, then what? Did
he just want to fall into some other job, find a woman, buy a
Volvo, have eerily pretty children who'd make fun of his accent
whenever he uttered a word of Swedish, and finally be buried in the
ground of a foreign land that couldn't even make a decent cup of
tea?

A big pointy boat went cruising
by, dragging deep troughs through the water. Two busty women in
swimsuits were leaning out over the rail, and one gave him a wave.
Rob gave them a big wave back and shouted, “Should keep yer eyes on
the road there!” He grinned as they motored on and then watched as
the wake passed under his feet and slapped against the wall in a
surge of sparkling water.

All in all, it wasn't a bad
country. The tap water was good, the heating was free, the holidays
were long, the coffee packed a wallop and he was in possession of a
rare and sexy accent that made girl's knees go soft. It wouldn't be
the worst place to end up. The only problem was that Rob wasn't
quite ready to “end up” anywhere, or with anybody, just yet.

When he'd licked the ice-cream
stick clean he sidled back onto the pavement, lit a cigarette and
sauntered back to his building. Passing from the daylight into the
sunless hall made him shiver and he hurried up the stairs and back
to his desk.

The first thing he noticed when
he settled down in front of the computer was another mail from
Karen. He moved the pointer towards it. Maybe there'd be some kind
of timetable for her arrival in this one, as he'd been prodding her
about that ever since the strange text message asking him to lie on
her behalf. She still hadn't told him what he should have been
retroactively lying about, and Rob was itching to find out.
Deceiving people was generally easier when you knew the topic.

Hi bro! Just a couple of colour
schemes, based on the ones you liked last time. Not much time to
comment, but what you showed me looked good. Think the top bar is
better, gives more horizontal room to lay out the calendar, and
that's the focus. You sure you want to make it all in Flash though,
it's a bit twee. But sure, whatever. And I'll be seeing you soon!
In a few weeks probably, so I hope the sofa's ready! And if you
talk to the mother, careful what you say, ok? Just don't act
surprised. Go along with it. Promise me? Cya soon!

Rob groaned. More bloody
secrets. What was she up to now, the daft girl? He stood up and
scratched his head, aware that this would require some serious
thinking on his part. In fact, it would probably require a couple
of cigarettes. He moved to the living room, opened the balcony door
and leaned out, cigarette in hand, as he started to ponder.

What was going on here? Since
when had Karen been a schemer? Family members shouldn't go around
changing personality without consulting him, it was just wrong and
it caused unnecessary work for him in keeping up. The smoke curled
from his nose as he tapped the cigarette on the balcony
railing.

Okay, since she wasn't keen to
discuss it by mail or text, he should probably just call her and
ask directly what the hell she was up to. He pulled the mobile from
his pocket, found her number and waited while the ring tone
repeated a dozen times before it slid into meaningless beeps.

He sighed. So she was avoiding
him on her mobile, which meant he'd have to call the house instead.
She might not be home, but he had to start somewhere. He scanned
through his contacts again, planning what he'd say to her, and was
about to press dial when he was interrupted by the doorbell.

He looked up in exasperation.
Milly, and she was early again. He stubbed out the cigarette,
shoved the mobile back in his pocket and hurried to the door.

Milly nodded as she sidestepped
her way in. She deposited in the hall a couple of paper bags,
containing what appeared to be old clothes and a few huge balls of
wool. She pulled the door closed with a foot and wiped her forehead
with the back of her hand.

“
There was a little flea
market at the bus stop, I couldn't resist.” She stared suspiciously
at Rob. “You're white as a grub, haven't you been outside? You
know, the sunlit realms? Don't they ever call to you?”

“
Sure, I was out just a
while ago, went and sat in the sun and everything. Got my vitamin D
fix for the whole week.”

She nodded doubtfully as she
stepped around him and into the kitchen. She was wearing baggy
paint-flecked jeans, a faded orange t-shirt which had seen too many
winters, and a green scarf tied in her hair. She looked like
something from an old Australian soap opera.

“
You could use a few
plants in here. Give you something to talk to.” She positioned
herself by the sink, and downed a glass of water. Then she pulled
out a chair and sat at her usual place at Rob's messy workstation.
She pushed back the scarf, lifting the ropes of red hair off her
freckly face, and nodded to Rob.