Eternity (37 page)

Carlos manages to put into words the feelings I am having, “You know, when you leave, you will be taking my heart with you sweetness, because without you, I don't think it could go on beating”. It's exactly right, when I go a part of my heart will be left behind too, loving him just as much as it does now, but in the process, it will be breaking in two.

Whenever you start a relationship, there is a tiny part of you that keeps in mind that your heart may get broken, but it's easily forgotten about in the throws of passion, but when you know exactly what date and time your heart will break, it's impossible to put it out of your mind. I imagine it's like knowing the day you will die; you can live your life to the full, appreciate every last second of it, but that day will always be looming over you, darkening everything you do.

We head back to the house around five, going via the shop to pick up some supplies, as he rarely cooks, I've found that there is almost never anything more than basic bread and cheese stocked in Carlos's kitchen.

We decide on a simple dish of chicken with tomatoes and salad, easy to knock up and little to clear up after.

We shower together again, it's surprising how dirty you get just hanging out around the resort. My hair and skin are covered in a layer of salt water, making them both dry and oily at the same time and there is sand stuck everywhere. When we've showered I change into a pair of Carlos's shorts and an old T-shirt to save unpacking anything, plus I love being cocooned in things that smell of him. 

I can wear my dirty clothes from today to catch the plane in the morning, as it's not like I'll have anyone to impress, I shake them out and hang them off the back of the chairs on the balcony in a vague attempt to air them a bit.

Once we are done we head downstairs and under my instruction we begin prepping dinner, it's really just a case of searing the chicken then shoving it all in a pan in the oven for an hour, but from watching Carlos, you'd think it was rocket science. That's definitely something I will have to fix about him at a later date, I laugh to myself. All in all he is pretty well trained, very polite and impeccably chivalrous, but I still believe a man should know how to cook more than scrambled egg on burnt toast!

Blair and John arrive right on time, seven on the dot, “Something smells good” John compliments us as he walks in.

“It's almost ready, we were thinking of eating in here if that's OK with you two, it's still a bit warm outside to be eating a hot meal” I suggest. They both agree that's fine, Blair moves to the kitchen to find a bottle opener for the wine they bought, “I love what you've done with this place” she says, perusing the cupboards, I'm betting that was the immediate reaction Carlos was hoping for when he first bought me here. Blair is ideal in every social situation, knowing exactly what to say, without any prompting and saying it in an entirely genuine manner.

When the wine is open we all sit round on the sofas, surprisingly it's John who breaches the elephant in the room “So, you're off home in the morning, are you guys going to keep in touch?” he asks innocently, Blair quickly kicks him in the ankle, obviously more aware of the sensitivity of the subject.

“It's OK” I wave off the awkwardness, “Yes we're keeping in touch, hopefully Carlos will be able to come to England in the next few weeks” I down play the reality, because if I told them how it actually made me feel, I'd probably burst into tears.

“That's great” Blair chips in, “will you be in your new home by then?” she asks, subtly changing the subject.

“I hope so, my friend Caz has been handling it and she seems to think it will be a done deal within a couple of weeks” my words are hollow, I speak because it's expected of me, but inside all I can think of now is having to leave. I take Carlos's hand and squeeze it in my own, somewhere deep down in the area he sends things in denial, he must be feeling the same.

When he squeezes back a lump forms in my throat, hold it together Kaitlin, you've done enough crying in public throughout this holiday and tonight is meant to be a nice night, not another one filled with you sobbing.

To take my mind off it and to remove the pressure of having everyone’s eyes boring into me, I stand and walk to the kitchen, opening the oven door to make it look like I'm just checking on dinner.

“Do you need a hand?” Blair calls after me.

“No, it's OK” I call back, just loud enough for her to hear, but not so clearly that the grief is apparent in my voice.

As it happens, it looks pretty much done, in fact the garlic bread we shoved in last minute is almost starting to turn to the dark side, so I have a good excuse to keep out of the way for a minute.

I take everything out and start to dish up, every time I spoon out a portion I catch a glimpse of my tattoo, it's beginning to heal up now so I haven't had it covered today,  but I'm still applying cream twice a day. It makes me smile, no matter what happens I have this, an eternal reminder of our love and a promise that we will, somewhere, somehow end up together.

“Right, come and get it” I call out once everything is plated up and I have composed myself.

“This looks great Kate, thank you” Blair says, taking the plate I pass to her and moving back to the sofa. Carlos does not own a dining room table as he always eats at the breakfast bar, but it's a little cramped for four people and as you all line up on one side of it, it makes it hard to chat, so we decide that sitting on the sofas with our plates on our laps is the better option.

We all sit around, taking it in turns to eat and talk, Carlos has on his entertaining face, but his smile never seems to reach his eyes. There's something I can't quite put my finger on, but I'm sensing a growing tension under the surface. It must just be time slipping by, it's had the same affect on me these last few days, once I become aware of the minutes passing by I can't help but loathe the fact that every one of them is bringing my departure that little bit closer.

I give his arm a little squeeze and when he turns to me I throw him a sympathetic, 'I know how you feel' look, he holds my gaze blankly for a second then turns back to our guests, dismissing me entirely. Not this again, I thought he had learned from the last time that taking it out on me when he's upset only makes the situation worse!

I don't know how to respond to this, should I take him into another room and have a stern word with him, I don't want my last night to be tainted with one of his foul moods after all. But who's to say that would even help? Last time I had to threaten to move out before I finally broke him, so talking about it is liable to just make it worse.

I think all I can do is ignore it and focus on Blair and John and keep my fingers crossed that he snaps out of it by the time I leave. I had imagined a tearful, heartbreaking goodbye, not an emotionless, see you later then. Mind you his mood swings are so sudden, that who knows, he may change again in the next five minutes. Yes, I will just leave it for now and deal with it later if I absolutely have to.

Blair and John are merrily chatting away and have already opened the second bottle of wine by the time we are half way through our dinner, I pull myself out of my own head and join back in as cheerily as I can manage. Carlos continues to smile and nod along, but offers nothing but silence to the conversation.

Mid sentence Blair shoots me a look, I've seen it before on Caz when she's been around Jake in one of his moods, so I know exactly what she's asking, but as usual I have no insight into what goes on in the minds of my men, so all I can do is give a tiny shrug; she accepts it with an understanding smile and seamlessly continues with her story.

When everyone's plates are clear I start collecting them, “Whats for afters?” Blair asks eagerly as she passes her empty plate to me.

“Afters?” I ask shocked, “Where do you put it all?” her slight frame gives no indication of the amount of food she can pack away, “I think there's some ice-cream in the freezer” I say bringing a smile to her face. I glance at Carlos, the suggestion of ice-cream immediately bought to mind, for me, the night we spent binging on mint-choc-chip and amaretto biscuits, but either he is still in no mood to reminisce, or he didn't even hear the conversation, because he looks completely oblivious to everything right now. Again I don't rise to it, instead choosing to dump the plates in the sink for him to deal with later and fish out the desert.

I'm just passing bowls around when someone knocks on the door, it can only be his family again, I hope to God it's his parents, but a foreboding feeling tells me it's more likely to be his siblings coming for their pound of flesh!

Carlos goes to the door, I'm half tempted to tell him not to answer it, but there's another knock when he's halfway to the door, so I just leave him to it, with any luck with the mood he's in, he will frighten them off pretty quickly.

When he opens the door I'm sat with my back to it, opposite Blair, I see her face fall in shock, I know that last time she came into contact with Julia she ended up being pushed off a boat, but she was fine, so it seems like a bit of an overreaction; I follow her gaze, turning towards the door, only to find it's not any member of Carlos's family standing there, but instead five men dressed in police uniforms.

They are talking quietly to Carlos, but he motions for them to come in, returning to the group he explains, “The police have had a report of drugs on the property so they are going to have to do a search.”

My jaw drops to the ground as they begin routing through drawers and requesting we all stand so they can search under the sofa cushions. “Drugs?” I look at Carlos confused, but he just shrugs, not meeting my gaze, this has Marcus's scheming written all over it, he's clearly just trying to ruin our last night together by any means possible.

One of the men is in the kitchen struggling to pull the cupboards open, like I had done when I first arrived. Carlos says something in Spanish to him, moving to his side to demonstrate how to open them; the police officer smiles, but quickly replaces the expression with a straight face, but you can tell he is impressed by the technology.

A couple of them move upstairs, while the remaining two continue to search around us.

“Who is this?” one of them asks, pointing to my bags, by the door.

“Oh, they're mine” I say moving forward, he holds up his hand to tell me not to come closer and so I stop and watch him unzip my suitcase and begin to rifle through it. It's annoying to watch, knowing that I'm just going to have to re-pack once he's done as he is chucking it piece by piece out onto the floor.

I'm just turning away from him when he calls one of the others over to him, causing me to whip back round, what does he think he has found? I packed it myself this morning, so I know there is nothing illegal in there, especially not any drugs, there's not even any painkillers in there as I've used all the ones the doctor gave me for my injuries.

All eyes in the room are focused on them as cop number two bends down and retrieves a small white package from inside my suitcase. The rest happens in slow motion, the one from the kitchen moves in behind me, taking hold of my arms and pulling them behind my back, everyone is shouting and bustling around us as he secures my wrists in handcuffs. The two men who went upstairs come running back down at the sound of the commotion, I'm vaguely aware of one of the police men saying something to me, but in my disbelief I don't hear a word of it.

I shake my head and keep saying no, this can't be happening, but I'm being frog marched towards the door all the same. Blair is calling out rapidly in Spanish to them, I don't know what she's saying, but there's panic in her voice.

“It's alright Kate, we'll get this sorted out” she says to me, but all I can do is stare at her numbly, the blood draining from my face. She turns her attention back to the policemen stating her arguments against them taking me again, while John tries to block our path, causing the others to man handle him out the way. It's utter chaos, everyone is shouting and pushing, causing mayhem and no doubt making things even worse. I'm being bundled out the front door when I finally hear Carlos, I hadn't noticed him throughout all this until now and when I turn towards his voice, I see him still stood in the kitchen, frozen to the spot, “It's mine” he yells, then repeats it twice in Spanish. Everyone comes to a standstill for a moment, before one of the cops goes to him and puts him too in handcuffs. As he is bought towards me his eyes burn in the way they did after Jake attacked me, only this time they are trained solely on me.

“I put it there, this whole thing has been a set up, so I can get you to take it into England without knowing” he states cruelly, “Just go back home and forget about me, I'm sorry alright, I didn't mean for you to get caught out, I thought you'd get through no problem, I mean look at you.” he sneers the last part, his words apologising but his tone is harsh and unfeeling.

I don't have time to react before he's hauled away, but what can I possibly say to that anyway?

I'm still being led away for some reason, surely they've got the culprit so I should be let go? “Blair?” I call out to her for help.

“They are taking you to the station for questioning” she explains quickly, “They have to be sure what Carlos is saying is true. Don't worry, we will get a taxi down to the station and meet you there alright?”

“OK” I call back as they pull me away.

Sat in the back of the police car I've never been so scared, or confused in all my life. This can't be happening, it just can't be, but Carlos's words were clear. He set me up, this whole thing was a lie; Can I really be one of those women you hear about who get duped into believing some young, hot man has fallen in love with them in the space of a short holiday, only to find out they just wanted a visa, or someone to smuggle drugs for them.