Every Which Way (Sloan Brothers) (36 page)

That was her first mistake. Because now, if anything, it was worse. Her want spread throughout her whole body and urged her to walk across the hall—to take what she so clearly wanted.

But there was still the fearful side of her heart; the part of her heart that warned her he could do the same thing as Macsen. There was always a chance that Thayer could leave her broken.

She took two steps and halted. Her hand reached out, and she was so close to his door. Close enough to grab the doorknob and turn.

It was her stubbornness that made her turn sharply and silently walk down the stairs. When she got to the bottom floor, she peeked to the left and saw the TV. The volume was turned low, and a late night talk show played. Faint laughter rang from the speakers, and Severine smirked once at the screen. Her eyes turned to the L-shaped couch, and she stopped laughing.

The one person she was trying to keep strong against lay unaware in front of her. Thayer was stretched out on one side of the couch, with only a pair of basketball shorts on. It was like the world was dangling him in front of her and demanding that she did nothing. Severine was never good at fighting off temptation. The lust inside of her wanted to jump across the couch and take him.

Severine crossed her arms and her fingernails dug into her skin. He gazed dully at the screen, while Severine stared at him from the corner. Light from the TV played across his chest and stomach. She could make out every ridge and definition. Her head wanted to rest against the wall next to her and stay there. But warning bells were ringing in her head; she had already been here too long.

Slowly, she backed up. A floorboard beneath her protested, and Severine froze.

Thayer kept his eyes on the screen as he spoke. “Go to bed, Mathias...I said I’d leave her alone.”

His voice was deep. It drifted across the space between them and reached her in a rush. It felt good to know he was thinking about her, that he was fighting the same feelings she was.

She stepped back into the room. “You know it’s bad to sleep with the TV on, right?”

At the sound of her voice, Thayer flipped his body over and crashed loudly on the floor. He looked up at her and from where she stood Severine could see his wide eyes. “Holy shit, Severine. You scared the crap out of me!”

Severine smiled and leaned against the back of the couch. “Whatcha doing?”

He stood awkwardly and watched her slowly—with weariness. “Watching TV.”

“I didn’t know you were a night owl.” She walked into the living room and circled around the couch. If he could see her skin, he’d notice that it was prickled with goosebumps. Not from the cold air, it was all from his stare.

“I’m not.”

“Then why are you up?”

Thayer tossed the remote away from him and patted the seat next to him. “Probably the same reason you are.”

Severine walked over to him willingly and leaned back into the couch. The silence between them wasn’t amicable because neither one of them wanted it there. They both had other thoughts on their minds. None of it involved silence.

“I don’t want to go back tomorrow,” Severine finally admitted.

Thayer nodded and spoke to the floor. “I know. I kind of wish a freak blizzard would hit.”

Severine looked down at his arm so close to her own. Her hand reached out between them and with her index finger she traced the veins that led up to his biceps.

She was waiting for him to pull away or tell her that they shouldn’t be in this situation. Because if she wasn’t thinking right, one of them needed to.

Instead, he grabbed her arms and placed her on top of his lap. She straddled his legs and stared down at the one person that scared her more than anything. Behind them a commercial came on, providing enough light for Severine to see the expression in his gray eyes. He was asking for so much from her. She wanted to give him her trust, but right now, she didn’t know how.

Her hands went to the muscles in between his neck and shoulders. They were tense, showing just how apprehensive he was. With his eyes still on her face, he pulled her closer by the drawstring of her pants. “Am I in over my head for still wanting you?”

She could wind up in this position multiple times and never pull away. Even if it was the right thing to do, she’d stay firmly close to him. “No,” she finally rasped out.

He looked just as unsure as she felt. He still went underneath her shirt, he still touched her. When his hands reached the swell of her breasts, she pressed herself closer. Thayer spoke his words against her cheek. “Then what do we do, Severine?”

She pulled her face away long enough to whisper back a response—an answer from her heart. “Just stay close to me.”

Even after last night, she still wanted more. So much more. Her hands drifted underneath his basketball shorts and boxers. She touched him, and he groaned. Severine leaned down and whispered two words, “Follow me.”

Those words were a simple command, but they held so much power. Anything after this was deliberate and with choice. It’d be impossible to turn back.

Chapter Thirty-nine

Severine could sink her teeth into him. There was no certain sweet out there that was good for you. They were all bad for you. But if you searched long enough, you’d find a chocolate that was sinfully good.

You wouldn’t step away with one piece in your hands. No, you’d grab all you could get.

Thayer was Severine’s sinful sweet. After him, there’d be no salvation for her. Not when all she could see was absolution. The word gleamed Severine’s feelings brightly. Guilt stepped in every time she hurriedly drove to meet him. It’d be forgotten the second she saw him. There was a sense of obligation her body felt toward him and for a few hours, everything would be forgotten.

But her conscience would instantly punish her instincts. Over and over it repeated that she was addicted and that she was bound to get hurt again.

The sneaking around had started the minute he dropped her off at her dorm. She saw him that night. He came to her, pounding on her door without caring if everyone in her dorm heard him.

“I can’t give up without a fight.” His declaration still gave her chills—still made her heart go into overdrive. After that, everything became a domino effect. It’d probably always be this way.

But it was hard to think of the wrong when something so right lay underneath her.

Her palms glided up his stomach. Thayer smiled and crossed his hands behind his head. His biceps flexed at the action. Severine’s fingers trailed across his pecs toward the expanse of muscles in his arms.

Underneath her, Thayer’s body jerked. A slow smile spread across Severine’s face. “Are you ticklish?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“A viable question when your body jerks around.”

“Maybe it’s because of you?” Thayer provided.

Severine wrapped her hand around his jaw and kissed him slowly. “You should stop fighting then.”

When she pulled her head back, Thayer blinked repeatedly. “I swear, you’re gonna fucking kill me,” he muttered.

Her heart raced as Thayer’s hands moved from her hips up to her waist. His movements were slow, like he was an artist and was trying to trace her figure. If she could halt time from continuing, she would.

Severine let her vulnerability show, just for a second. That was all she could show. She intersected his hands from going any further and linked them with her own. “Add a little poison to your kiss, and you’d be my forbidden fruit.”

Thayer arched a single brow. “Getting religious on me, Blake?”

“We both know we shouldn’t be here, and yet, we keep meeting.” His eyes briefly looked fearful. Severine continued with the truth, knowing that it’d hurt her more than him. She glanced at him and whispered out her response, “Sometimes I think I border on worshipping you.”

He slowly nodded his head. They may be alike in so many ways, but there was one thing different about them. Thayer was obstinate. He concentrated over his words with such determination that when he spoke, you knew it was the truth. It made Severine feel heedless—completely out of control.

His eyes drifted down to where they had connected intimately minutes ago. She could go again. Just by him looking at her body, her skin started to tingle with awareness. Severine released his hands, and he immediately cupped her breast. Against her leg she could feel that he was getting hard again. “When we part, what do you feel?” he asked.

It was his eyes she could feel. They traveled across her skin, slowly. He acted as if her body was the map that would lead him to every right direction. Severine’s fear was that he’d lead her toward a cliff. She’d plunge into a dark hole and never see the light of day again.

“It’s a struggle—a tug of war between my good and evil side.”

Her comment was meant to be a joke. Thayer didn’t crack a smile. “What do you feel?”

“I feel like I should seize every moment I have with you before it’s taken away.”

“What does the evil side of you feel?”

Severine shrugged slowly. It was a slash to her heart. Truths weren’t something she was used to coming out of her mouth. Unveiling the sensitive side of her soul was a strange feeling. It made her heart race out of fear—fear that he would reject all her answers. “The same thing.”

Thayer exhaled a breath and nodded his head. “I think you should listen to both the good and evil side of yourself. They seem extraordinarily smart.”

A smile was planted firmly on her face as she stared down at him. When she looked at the clock, her smile dimmed. They’d have to leave soon.

She moved quickly off of him and searched for her clothes on the floor. Severine slipped on her underwear and snatched up the barrette on the dresser. She knotted up her hair and glanced at his jersey hanging up in the corner.

Thayer rolled to his side. The sheet inched down, and she was close to seeing his entire body. “Where are you going?”

She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms underneath her breasts. It was a powerful feeling having Thayer’s gaze focused solely on her body. For a quick second, he glanced at his jersey and then back at her exposed skin. “Are you going to my game?”

Her right hand reached out and moved a piece of material away from the hanger. One tiny slip and the rest of the jersey would fall to the ground. Severine caught it with deft fingers and looked down at the letters stitched on the back. It spelled out Sloan. Severine stared at the jersey as she answered him. “I’ll probably never go to one.”

“Ever?”

“I like the way it is here. People cheering and screaming your name would just be...”

“Too real?” Thayer provided.

Severine let out a deep breath. “Yes.”

“Maybe I’ll play shitty,” Thayer offered. Severine smirked and gripped his jersey tighter in her hand. She knew he wouldn’t. “Then you wouldn’t have to worry about cheers. It’d be a lot of booing and people yelling at me to get my head in the game. Would that make you feel better?”

“What would make me feel better is if we just stay here.” Severine paused and lifted the jersey over her head. When it covered her body, Thayer sat up quickly. Instantly, he was alert.

“Who else has worn your jersey?” Severine asked.

Thayer looked her up and down and smirked. “Just you.”

Severine nodded. The wicked gleam in her eyes made Thayer throw his feet over the edge of the bed.

“What about that Vanessa girl?”

“Vanessa?”

“That girl at the club.”

Thayer stood and slipped on his boxers. He smiled widely and walked closer. “You seem jealous.”

“I am,” Severine confirmed. “And I’ll probably always be that way. Consider it one of the many perks of being with me.”

“It is,” Thayer agreed. He stood in front of her, and Severine leaned her head back against the wall to look at his face. His fingers grasped the material of his jersey. He wrapped it around his fist and jerked her towards him. “You know the biggest perk?”

“What?”

“When I play tonight, I’m gonna smell you on me.”

*    *    *    *    *

Severine could play with the best of them.

Sneaky was her middle name in high school. Her mom used to say that when she was quiet, that meant she was up to no good. Severine smirked and looked down at her coffee. This past week had been filled with nothing but Thayer. It was a good kind of quiet.

“You’re here before me.” Lily held her coffee in between her hands and stared down at Severine. “This must be serious.”

Severine shut her book and scooted over. “We haven’t seen each other since school started back up.”

Lily shrugged off her jacket and draped it over the edge of the couch. “It’s only been a week.”

“For us, that’s like a lifetime,” Severine pointed out.

“That’s why you should’ve agreed to stay with Ben and me for a while.”

“That would’ve been too much.”

“So...what’s up?” Lily finally asked.

Severine pushed her book aside and laughed at Lily’s calm demeanor. “I can’t believe this!”