Evil Origins: A Horror & Dark Fantasy Collection (116 page)

J.: When you enter the
profession, you’re young, excited, and the kids relate to you easily. As you
get older and generational gaps appear, how do you stay relevant in the lives
of the kids?

DON: When you talk to
anyone, you can only relate to them through the things they’re interested in.
If you don’t know the music that they’re listening to, if you don’t know the
social happenings in that age group, such as entertainment, if you don’t know
the sports that they follow, you can’t relate. All of this is at their
fingertips. Every generation has its own language. There is a specific
vocabulary that comes out of each generation, and you have got to talk their
language, that’s all there is to it. When you’re older, there is still a lot of
language that I grew up with that I still use, and I look a little corny using
it, and using their language, but they realize that and understand that. They
also understand that there’s a sincerity about understanding where they come
from. When I make analogies in class, I use contemporary issues or incidents
that are relevant to them. Influences on kids today are coming from the same
places they did a generation ago, such as your home, your school, the media.
The media has and always will be an influence. You have to study those
influences and determine what’s different about them now as opposed to your
own, and if you really care about the kids, you’ve got to speak their language
and follow these things. My wife watches VH1 all the time and keeps me up on
the current videos. So when the kids in school are talking about Lady Gaga, I
know who that is (laughs).

J.: Is a private education
worth the money?

DON: I get asked that
about our school. If the institution has a clear mission, and sticks to it, you
can fit the kid to it. That’s where it starts. If it’s a real good fit for the
kids, it’s an investment that you’re making, like an insurance policy. The way
the world works, it’s not what you know but who you know. The private school
club works that way. The kids go to certain schools, and people within the club
will give them their job when they come out. Independent schools in the United
States are like that, and I’m in one of them. In a sense, the probability of
them being able to eventually have a good job are more so than if they were in
a public school, but that’s abstract and complex, too, because the quality of
public schools varies. Essentially, money begets money, but it doesn’t
necessarily mean the kids are happy. Private school education is not worth it
for a kid who doesn’t fit with that school’s mission. Some private schools
don’t have a strong identity; they take any kid, they take their money, and
they push them through. At my school, if our kids don’t fit, we’re not going to
keep them.

I
talk to parents all the time about this. We have parents willing to spend
twenty-five thousand dollars a year, but it isn’t as easy as it was back in the
70s. Now parents want to know what they’re getting for their money. It’s for
parents that want to be more invested in their children’s education, want more
ownership of it. They are more visible, more vocal than they ever were, and
they have every right to be. We need to be held completely accountable for what
we’re doing. The days of ‘Johnny’s teacher is right and that’s all there is to
it’ are gone. You need to gain the respect of the kids and the parents, and you
do that by being completely open and honest with them at all times and by being
held accountable for what you do.

J.: Can you talk about
making mistakes in the classroom?

DON: I can think of
various incidents over the years where I messed up, but nothing that I thought
was significant. What we have to keep in mind is that we have no idea how the
littlest things can affect a human being, what we say or what we do. The things
that I remember, whether it was coaching or in the classroom, were saying
things that I thought later could really make the kid feel bad or things that
could have been humiliating to them. That would stick with me, so I’d have to
go back and not only apologize to them but do it with the other people that
were there. I’d say that ‘it was totally wrong how I said that to you,’ and the
next time we were in class I’d bring it back up. I’d say, ‘what I said to Bobby
over there the other day, that was totally wrong, I was out of line, and I
apologize for it.’ So I’ve done some things where I’ve had to apologize to the
class. I’ll never forget those incidents, and I don’t know if apologizing
really makes up for it or not, but I chalk it up to being human. We all make
mistakes, and I hope that when I go back and apologize that way that it would
be significant to the kid as well. You’re going to make mistakes, and all you
can do is try to make up for them any way that you can and move on from there.

J.: Tell me about a kid
that you saw struggling or thought was never going to ‘make it’ in life, and
after working with him you saw him come out the other side.

DON: My experience is so
narrow because I’ve only been at one school, but the things that happen at my
school happen at all schools. We spend most of our meeting time talking about
the same three or four kids, and a lot of the talk about the three or four
troubled kids has more to do with teachers venting because these aren’t your
traditional kids that fit into the mold, and they’re more difficult to teach. I
love these kids. One kid that I remember was bright and could do the work, but
he never wanted to do it. He was a ‘troublemaker’ to them, so they gave him to
me to try and get him through. He is extremely successful today. He went to a
really nice boarding school, went on to Princeton even though teachers at our
school thought he would never even go to college because of his antisocial
behavior. So I’ve seen a number of kids like that, a number of kids that
weren’t going to ‘successful’ in life. Two of those guys, two brothers that
were that way, now own five restaurants in New York City. They are highly
successful. They went to culinary school. Nobody knew what these guys would
ever do, and they didn’t either. They were always very social, very likeable,
always a part of anything that was going on, but when it came to hunkering down
and doing your work and getting As, they weren’t like that. They were C
students in our school. I can’t tell you how many of those kinds of kids have
gone on to established and successful careers. I know some of these kids that
are now doctors or lawyers.

People
pass judgment on what it means to be successful, and these kids were successful
beyond academic prowess. Academic success is developmental. During faculty
meetings, I don’t say much, but I do stand up for the same kids that are being
picked on, and I remind the teachers that kids develop at their own rates,
especially in adolescence. There will be a wider diversity intellectually,
socially, and emotionally. Because of that, I weigh more of the intangibles
when it comes to success. If we can look beyond the tangibles, we can see the
intangibles, which are truly the most important. But again, we’re in a system
where they look at scores. Maybe in twenty to thirty years we’ll be better at
looking at those intangibles instead of how much information you can shove in
your head and remember later.

J.: If you could deliver
an unedited message to new teachers, whether in private or public education,
what would it be?

DON: They’ve chosen
teaching. I don’t know why they’ve chosen teaching, their reasons. But they’d
have to tell me that they love kids. If they don’t love kids then they
shouldn’t be teaching. The second thing I would tell them is to always, always
be yourself. From that standpoint, you should teach from your personality. You
cannot teach with someone else’s style. You have to be true to who you are. If
you’re an energetic, enthusiastic person then you’re an energetic and
enthusiastic person. You cannot take that from somebody else, and kids need
every different type of style. We all do. Regardless of your style, you need to
be sincerely interested in what you’re doing in the classroom. If you’re not,
the kids will pick up on it right away. Don’t try to fool anybody. It can’t
just be a job for you. The word ‘passion’ is thrown around a lot because it’s
an easy word to use. If you are passionate about what you do, the kids will
want to know why, and they’re going to pay attention. When you teach, that’s
got to come across. Also, don’t be afraid to make mistakes and learn from them.
What’s different about me now from when I first started is that now I go into
the classroom and I wonder every day what I’m going to learn instead of what
I’m going to teach. It is so important to have an open mind.

An Interview with Emily

Emily
is adored by the kids. Not because she hands out candy during class or pretends
to be buddies, but because she is warm, empathetic, and truly cares about them.
She has been a middle school intern for two semesters and is hoping to begin a
career in teaching and coaching soon.

Emily
provided me with a perspective that we get only once in life, looking at a
career from the starting line. Her fears and hopes represent the time we live
in, one of dwindling abundance and global uncertainty.

J.: What are you most
frightened about?

EMILY: One of the things
I’m most frightened about is not being in a community with a supportive
administrative staff, having people that support me and feeling like what I’m
doing is right without people micro-managing. I’m scared of going into a school
environment with classroom management and seeing how it changes in the public
schools versus the private. I’m frightened about the direction education is
going, how payoff is based on how well you get the kids to pass tests or if you
get certain kids to pass tests, because I don’t think it really shows the kind
of teacher you are as it varies from class to class.

J.: What are you excited
about? What are you looking forward to?

EMILY: I’m really excited to have my own classroom, to have
that type of freedom. Teaching is the one thing where even though you still have
a boss, you still have a little bit of freedom, and I feel like having my own
classroom will let me help kids in a way that is engaging and relevant. Growing
up, I didn’t have very good teachers. When I look back, the good and the bad
teachers, aside from my family, have had the most impact on my life. Being a
teacher is such an important role because you impact so many lives, which is
scary but pretty awesome, too, to have that kind of impact in someone’s life.

J.: How are you going to
define your style as a teacher?

EMILY: For me, it will be
about doing things that are engaging, relevant, not just giving kids busy work
or work to do for no reason. I see myself as an asset in the classroom but more
so outside of the classroom, coming from a coaching background and being a
support system and being there for the kids.

J.: Tell me about
something you’ve seen that made you think, ‘I’ll never do that.’

EMILY: One time, I saw a
point where there was no organization, and kids picked up on that right away,
and you could see how the classroom changed right away and how kids outside of
the classroom talked about it. Another thing I saw was a teacher making a point
to embarrass a student. I could never see myself purposely embarrassing a kid
in front of a class.

J.: What do you think kids
expect or want from a teacher?

EMILY: I think they’re
looking for someone that cares. They want someone that is knowledgeable and
knows the content, for someone that’s motivating and inspiring. They’re looking
for someone that has boundaries and expects a lot out of them but not to the
point where they can’t reach that. What it really comes down to is someone that
cares.

J.: How might teaching
look different in twenty years, or will it look different?

EMILY: With technology, I
really see computers coming into play in the classroom, maybe even having
classes over the computer. I can see teachers being evaluated by passing
certain tests.

J.: How helpful have your
education classes been? Have you applied any of the skills you’ve learned in
the classroom?

EMILY: There have been
only one or two classes where I’ve learned something really relevant that I
applied to the classroom. Teachers preach certain stuff, but they’re not doing
it. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard about differentiated instruction,
and yet I’ve had teachers that have only given multiple choice tests or have
just lectured. It boils down to someone that’s a good person, someone that
cares. You can learn about the content by reading. First and foremost, you just
have to care. A lot of higher education is people making money off of you,
making you jump through hoops. I’ve learned the most from my internship.

J.: It’s Back-to-School
Night and you’re standing in front of a roomful of parents. You’re a new
teacher; they know you’re a new teacher. What are you going to say to them?

EMILY: I’ll probably start
with my background, where I’ve come from. I’ll welcome them and share my
expectations, invite questions.

J.: You will be one of
thousands in applicant pools. What is your plan for setting yourself apart in
the stacks of resumes?

EMILY: The fact that I
coach is really huge. Schools want coaches from the system, and many people
don’t coach. With the way the economy is right now, there are people that are
engineers that are going back to teaching, or someone with a law degree is
going back to teaching. So to compete with those people, I have to hold on to
the fact that I’m a coach.

J.: Given the number of
career paths available to educators today, where do you see yourself in ten
years?

EMILY: I think I’ll teach
for a little while, but I don’t think I’ll end up teaching for the rest of my
life. I see myself as a collegiate coach. I see how much teaching can wear on
you, and yet I can see how rewarding it is, so I’ll probably stay in it for a
while. When I think about what I’m passionate about, it’s coaching.