Falling to Pieces (8 page)

“Don’t you want to take him to the door? Maybe there’s a reward or something.”

“I don’t need a reward.” And I knew Kiernan didn’t. “He’s home, that’s all that matters.”

Kiernan stared back at me with the weirdest look on his face. I did my best not to stare as I tried to decipher it, until he blinked and that signature smile flashed back into place.

“You hungry?”

How he could possibly eat more after that gigantic tub of popcorn, I had no idea, but I couldn’t deny that the idea of food made my stomach very happy. “A little.”

There was a fast food restaurant we’d passed on our way, where once again Kiernan insisted on paying, which was fortunate seeing as I didn’t actually have any money on me. We were still out of bread, so I’d intended to skip lunch entirely. Every once and a while I had to tell Doug I was on a diet when I didn’t bring anything to share with him, but I had a feeling that wasn’t going to fly with Kiernan.

We took our cheeseburgers and fries to an outside table where we could enjoy what was probably going to be one of the last warm days of the season.

“So,” Kiernan squirted ketchup in his burger and slapped the roll back on top. “You really like animals, huh?”

“Kind of
. I used to want to be a veterinarian. When I was little.” I had no idea why I decided to throw that little tidbit out there over lunch.

“Ever been to the zoo?”

That was like asking if I’d ever been to Disney World. And, sadly, the answer to both was, “No.”

“Hmm. We’ll have to go sometime.” He said it so naturally. Like this ‘hanging out’ thing we were doing was going to become normal. “Have any pets?”

I swallowed before I was done chewing, nearly choking on beef and bun to answer him. “No.”

“Not even a gerbil?”

At that I had to laugh. My mother and a pet . . . yeah, right. “No, not even a gerbil.”

“That’s a little sad,
Jade. Do you still want to be a vet?”

“No. Not really.” I picked at the roll of my burger, suddenly missing my appetite.

“Why not?”

How was I supposed to explain that I’d grown up and had reality slap me in the face? Being a vet required schooling. A
lot
of schooling. A lot of
expensive
schooling. My grades were decent, but not that good. College was more than likely out of the question.

“It was a phase.”

Kiernan popped a fry in his mouth and grinned around it. “I had one of those once where I wanted to be an astronaut.”

“Oh, yeah? What happened to that?”

He shrugged. “Got on my first plane ride and realized I’m terrified of heights.”

Eight

Looking back, I should have known something was wrong the minute I walked into school the next morning and Doug wasn’t leaning against my locker. Or any of the times I came out of class and didn’t find him there, waiting for me to escort him to his next class. When lunch time rolled around and he was nowhere to be found, I thought maybe he’d stayed home sick that day. No such luck.

“Jade!” Doug didn’t need to say another word for me to see just how angry he was. It was written in every line of his face, in the predatory gait he prowled towards me with. The instinct to retreat as far as possible left me pressed up against the lockers without much room to maneuver as he closed in. “Where the hell were you?”

“I . . . um . . . I . . .” Need
ed a brain repair, obviously.

“I . . . um . . .” He mocked pouted at me, followed by a look of revulsion. “Car. Now.”

Apparently this was not a conversation meant for public ears. I wasn’t sure if that was a good or bad thing, but I wasn’t about to push him any further. Tutorial session forgotten, I slammed my locker shut and followed him down the hallway.

My heart pounded away inside my chest. Sweat broke out in my palms and the lump in my throat was making it difficult to breathe.

“I need to use the bathroom.” It was a lame attempt at buying time, but it worked.

With a huff, Doug paused outside the
ladies room and glared at me as I slipped inside. Thankfully, it was empty. Leaning heavily against the sink, I stared at my wide eyed, pale faced reflection. Crap, I looked terrified. Doug would not appreciate that. Everything with him was about appearances.

Splashing cold water on my face, I tried to take a few calming breaths. Pinching my cheeks did not bring about the same colorful result as it did in those old-
fashioned movies. All it gave me were sore cheeks and a complexion that continued to resemble Snow White. Another deep breath, released slowly through barely parted lips. I ran my fingers through my hair and decided I’d effectively killed as much time as I dared to.

The moment I reappeared in the hall, Doug turned and continued toward the exit without a word. Or without waiting to see if I’d follow. It was just assumed that I would. And I did. All the way into the parking lot, where he turned on me the moment the doors shut behind us.

“Where the hell were you?” Spittle flew from his lips as he screamed almost directly in my face, loud enough to send me back a step.

“I . . . I didn’t—”

“Were you with him?”

“Who?”

“
Parks!
I heard you were with Parks. Is that what you were doing? Too busy screwing around on me to bother coming to school?”

“No! I mean yes—” Doug’s eyes hardened and I rushed
on. “I was with him, but I wasn’t screwing around. I swear. We’re just friends. I’d never—”

“Bullshit
. I can’t believe I bought your holier-than-thou, Miss Goody-freaking-two-shoes routine for so damn long. And then you turn around hand it over to someone else?”

“I didn’t—”

“Shut! Up! I’m sick of your shit, Jade.”

I briefly considered making a run for it, but he was an athlete for
chrissakes. How far did I really think I would get? Plus . . . he had a car. So, yeah, not far.

Plan B had me scanning the lot for help, but maybe dallying in the bathroom wasn’t such a good idea, after all. We were alone.

“Doug, please, I didn’t do anything with Kiernan. We’re just friends. I’d never screw around. You know that.”

“I know that? You’re damn right I know that. Two
friggin’ years, Jade. That’s how long I’ve been putting up with you. Allowed you to stick around for the ride. I’ve been more than patient with you, but if you’re giving it up that easy, then I think it’s past time I get my fair share.”

“Doug, don’t—” I tried to get away, but before I could blink, he’d planted a hand against the brick wall on either side of my body, effectively trapping me.
“Please, Doug, don’t do this.” Tears welled in my eyes and spilled over. “Please, I—”

The rest of my plea was swallowed up when his lips came crashing down on mine.
I squirmed, my back scraping against the rough wall, and shoved at his chest, but he captured my wrists like they were nothing more than a nuisance and pinned them against the bricks without ever breaking his lip lock. My heart tumbled over itself it was racing so fast, and my lungs screamed for much needed oxygen. When I tried to turn my face away in order to breathe, Doug pressed his entire body up against mine, completely immobilizing me. I’d never felt so small.

Eventually the need to breathe must have gotten the better of him because he broke away long enough for a sob to tear from me. “Stop! Doug, stop. Please!”

“Shut up, you little slut.”

I struggled against his grip as his
mouth came back down on mine. Doug transferred my wrists to one hand, pinning them over my head as his free hand traveled to the hem of my shirt. God, this wasn’t happening. This was not happening. His tongue snaked its way inside my mouth and he shoved it so far down my throat I gagged.

Please. Please, please, please.
I begged silently for a miracle as my lungs and heart begged for mercy.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I fought back a wave of nausea that would surely drown me.
Just when I thought I may pass out—a drastic, but effective, escape from my current circumstances—Doug withdrew his invasion of my airway. But, he didn’t stop there. This time he removed his entire body from mine. Reeling a good three feet away.

I doubled over, dark spots blurring my vision—
either from oxygen deprivation or adrenaline overload, maybe both—and tried to focus on what was happening. There was a flash of sunlight on blonde hair, a fist, and then Doug hit the pavement.

My legs wobbled and my stomach still felt queasy. It took a minute, and a few deep breaths, for me to straighten up.

“Are you okay?” Kiernan stared back at me, the rage swirling in his eyes entirely foreign. Slowly, the anger gave way to concern, and his eyes softened to the Kiernan I knew. “Jade?”

I nodded, not entirely trusting my voice not to betray me.

“Did he hurt you?” Kiernan’s eyes scanned my body as I did a mental inventory. My wrists were sore and my lips swollen, but otherwise, I was fine.

“I’m—”

“Get away from my girlfriend.” Doug was on his feet again. Blood dripping from his nose and mouth, he looked like something right out of a horror movie.

“
You
stay the hell away from her.” Kiernan’s voice was deceptively low, but you’d have to be deaf not to hear the threat behind his words.

“Screw off!”

“Screw you!” Kiernan’s hands balled into fists at his sides.

“No thanks.
You’re not my type.
She
is.” Doug’s gaze flicked to me with a stomach churning grin, blood smeared across his perfect, white teeth. “Move it, Jade.”

“No.” Kiernan stepped in front of me, ducking his head to catch my eye. “Enough is enough. This has to stop, Jade. And you have to be the one to stop it. You can’t keep letting him treat you this way.”

My heart hammered inside of my chest as my gaze flicked from Kiernan to Doug and back again. Could I really do this? I knew that I should, that Doug had crossed some major lines. I also knew the time for putting the brakes on had long passed. It was time to make a decision. I was either all-in, or all-out. I couldn’t keep playing around in that middle ground anymore. But could I really go all-in with Doug? With anyone? Was I ready for that? The answer was a resounding no. I just wasn’t. I couldn’t.

“Doug, I . . .” I bit my lip not really knowing what to say.

His face contorted with disgust. “Are you kidding me? I’ve towed your ass through this school despite what everyone else said about you, and this is how you repay me? You
owe
me.”

“That’s bullshit!” I’d never seen Kiernan so red before. He was practically shaking with rage. “She doesn’t owe anybody anything.”

Doug, being the master of selective hearing, chose to ignore him entirely. “You’re making a big mistake. I’m the only thing protecting you from yourself here. You cut ties with me and the sharks will descend like you can’t believe. They will eat you alive without my protection.”

“Don’t listen to him,” Kiernan pleaded, turning his back on Doug.

But I was listening. And I heard him loud and clear. He was right. He was always right. Without Doug, I was good as fodder. High school was bad enough now. I couldn’t imagine having to walk through the halls without him by my side. He’d been my personal shield for the past two years. How was I supposed to survive without that? In my entire life, only one person had ever actually wanted me around. And that was Doug.

“I . . .”

“Jade.” Kiernan moved in closer, until all I could see was his face. “You do not need him. He’s a manipulative, controlling bastard. Look at the way he treats you. You’re nothing more than a power-trip to him. That isn’t love. He doesn’t even
respect
you.”

I bit my lip as it began to tremble. Doug didn’t love me. Nobody did.

“Jade, you deserve so much better than that. You don’t love him. I know you don’t. You know you don’t. Put an end to this before it’s too late.”

Did I love Doug? I loved the
idea
of Doug. The idea that someone could care about me that way. That I was worthy of being loved by someone.

“Jade?” Kiernan spun around to face him at the sound of Doug’s irritated voice.

“Doug, I . . . I can’t. Anymore. I’m sorry.” The words came out so soft, I wondered if he even heard them.

But I knew he had when his entire body went rigid and he stepped toward me. “You stupid bit—”

Kiernan tensed. “One more step and I will kick your ass. Again.”

Doug ground his teeth, glaring at me over Kiernan’s shoulder, but he made no move to get any closer.

“You’ll regret this, Jade. I promise you, you’ll regret this,” he spat, storming off toward his car without looking back.

It was for the best. I was better off without him. That’s what I kept telling myself even as a small part of me curled up and died
, watching him go. Now I had no one.

“Jade?” Kiernan watched me closely as Doug’s car tore from the lot, tires squealing down the road.

I sniffled hard and scrubbed at the tears I hadn’t realized were rolling down my cheeks.

“I didn’t mean to—” Kiernan looked like a kicked puppy.

“No. You were right. I don’t need him.” I don’t need anyone.

“No, y
ou don’t. But . . . are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” I plastered on a plastic smile and Kiernan frowned.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Pretend with me. Don’t. Please? I just want you to be honest with me.” Kiernan reached for my face and then stopped before gently wiping away a stray tear.

Honesty wasn’t exactly one of my best virtues. Being honest with others required me to be honest with myself.

“Are. You. Alright?”

I considered lying again, but what was the point. Those stupid tears continued to stream down my face. “No.”

Kiernan sighed. “But you’re not going to let me call the police, are you?”

The police?
The thought alone nearly had my eyes bugging out of their sockets. “No! No police.”

“
I didn’t think so.” He frowned at me before sucking his lower lip and worrying it between his teeth. “Will you come with me? Come for a ride with me? There’s something I want to show you.”

It was either go with Kiernan or start the long trek home. Something I most certainly did not have the energy for. “Okay.”

I moved like a zombie after Kiernan as he took my hand and led me across the lot. My brain wasn’t exactly firing on all cylinders, so it wasn’t until we were standing next to a midnight blue Bentley that I realized Kiernan’s usual mode of transportation wasn’t there.

“Where’s your bike?”

“It’s getting a bit cold for the bike. I think we, sadly, may have taken it for its last ride yesterday.”

“Oh.”

Kiernan opened the passenger side door and helped me into the soft leather seat. It was definitely more comfortable than the bike, though the console set between us felt more like the Great Wall of China when Kiernan slid behind the wheel.

I didn’t possess the mental capability to bother asking where we were going. Also, I really didn’t care. We’d only cruised for a few minutes when Kiernan pulled into a turnoff a
couple miles from the school. It led to some hiking trails that I’d never actually hiked. I saw cars parked there often during the summer time, but no one was brave enough to be out there now. Except us, apparently.

“You coming?” Kiernan stood, holding open my door
, while I considered my answer. He wasn’t kidding about it getting colder. The chill that had been falling at night for the past few weeks seemed to have settled in to stay and not even the sun could remove the nip from the air.