Fantasy of Flight (22 page)

“Alright, alright. I get it. No talking about the past.” He stands up and lifts his hands in surrender. I turn to him.

He got my hint. I don’t think someone has caught one of my hints in nearly a year. It’s a nice change from the Bruma. He catches my look of surprise and takes it as an opportunity to push my braid back over my shoulder.

“I just want you to know, watching you drop them both was one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen,” he says.

Now would be the ideal time to get in my own Soar and glide off, but that would mean I could actually fly. I stand, tense, while I’m strapped in front of Hamish for the return journey.

Over the next few weeks, I realize there’s a pattern. Every Sunday, the Ire gathers at Adox’s island where they share stories, food and dancing. They’ve taken the custom of music from Glacium, though there’s no alcohol in sight. Crystal says it is banned because it was too dangerous. People have stumbled off the sides, never to be seen again and there were some instances where people flew into rock faces. This doesn’t stop the Ire folk from celebrating. The more time that passes, the more my mental unrest grows. I could stay here. Life could be this easy. But could it be enough for me? And how long would the Ire be peaceful if I did not return. A war between the unsuspecting worlds would affect their trade and their way of life.

I couldn’t shake the feeling of something being unfinished. Belatedly, I see it would have been easier to talk to Jovan right away. Each day which passes makes the thought of facing him more awkward. I should have learned this from removing my veil the first time; rip the bandage off.

A pair of familiar green eyes stare at me. Hamish hasn’t given up on me, either with flying lessons or with ‘wearing me down’. I like Hamish, I really do. He’s handsome and funny, like Sanjay. But every time he grabs my hand or smiles, I compare him to Jovan against my will. Hamish’s eyes make me smile, but they don’t heat my skin like the King’s piercing gaze. Is this normal after sleeping with someone? I know people move onto other partners. Bruma do it all the time. Maybe it’s just different for Solati. I bet Jovan has already been with someone else. He’s probably already forgotten our night together.

A thought occurs to me. “Hey, you’re not sabotaging my flying lessons to spend time with me are you?” I ask Hamish. He laughs and I notice many of the young women give him yearning looks. Surprisingly, they don’t seem to begrudge me for holding his attention. Either they’re being respectful or they’re good at hiding their thoughts.

He shies back in a dramatic gesture. “No, I swear I’m not. Though I wish I’d thought of that. I’m afraid you’re just genuinely bad,” he says. Crystal laughs with him while I pretend to scowl. I’ve had a hard-to-swallow lesson in humility with the Soar, but I’ve decided to try and see it in a funny light, like everyone else does.

I watch as Hamish and Crystal talk.

“I’ll be heading back tomorrow.” The words break me from my thoughts.

“You are?” I ask Crystal.

She nods. “It’s a shame you can’t fly yet. You could have come for a visit,” she says. “Although, it’s probably not safe to do that. Best you stay here.” I try to think of some way around her comment. Some way to let her know I want to go back, without revealing my pitiful reason for exposing her.

“Yes, it’s probably best,” I finally echo.

Sighing, I turn my attention to the family next to me. Jimmy, the young red-haired boy who had flown around Isha’s island for a full day when I arrived, is trying to sneak unobtrusively into the celebrations.

“Jimmy! You better not have been soaring your nose in the wrong places again,” his mother yells. There are loud chuckles from the watching crowd. Jimmy is always off exploring, much to the exasperation of his mother. His father is often away trading on the black market with Osolis, as many of the men who passed for Solati or Bruma did.

“But Mama, you know I see stuff. You liked it when I warned you about all those Bruma and the veiled lady that time,” he says. I freeze.

“We have scouts for that. It’s too dangerous for a little boy,” she scolds him while juggling two other young children and a parcel of food. I see Adox watching me and smooth my features.  The small boy crosses his arms and sulks, muttering under his breath. “Well Hannah just sleeps on her watch, and no one goes as far as I do.”

“Can we go exploring one day?” I ask Hamish. He thinks hard for a moment. His playfulness reminds me of Kedrick sometimes.

“How about when you can
fly
, we’ll go exploring,” he says.

I arch my brow in an expression of innocence. “Oh, you don’t want me strapped to you for the whole day?” I ask. I laugh at his crestfallen expression. Crystal high-fives me as we walk to our Soar.

“You’ve got him dancing in the palm of your hand.” She laughs and then stops me with soft pull on my forearm. “Don’t hurt him, though. He’s kind of like a brother to me. And an idiot most of the time, but…he’s nice,” she says. “And we both know that’s not a quality every man has.”

“I don’t think I could be with him,” I admit. She waits for me to expand on my comment. I shrug. “I have too much behind me and too many obstacles in front.”

She is silent while she thinks about my words. It’s one of the many things I like about her.

“If so, you need to tell him you’re not interested,” she says.

I turn to her. “Why do I have to do that?” If I ignore his advances he’ll get the hint. This is how it works on Osolis anyway. Much better than the cringe-worthy conversation she advocates.

She shakes her head. “He shows an interest and you let him know if he’s got a chance or not. That’s how it works. If you don’t, he’ll get hurt in the long run and it will ruin your friendship.”

I think her proposed plan would ruin our friendship, but I don’t say anything. “Okay, I’ll think about it.”

Crystal’s right about one thing. Hamish
is
nice. I can’t help but feel he’s
too
nice for the person I’ve become. He would have been perfect for the girl on Osolis before Kedrick died, but too much has happened. I can’t drag him into my mess of a life. He doesn’t deserve it. And I wasn’t entirely sure he could handle it either.

The women at the nursery are still distant. I’ve guessed it’s me caring for their children which makes them so untrusting. I stand to one side to practice strapping myself into the Soar. Hamish says if I can beat him, we can go down to the pathway tomorrow.

“Cara, come back here!” one of the petite blond women calls to the sweet toddler with the unusual eyes. Cara continues on, oblivious. I trace her current path to the edge fence, only a couple of meters in front of her. I’m about to look away again when I see the small hole in the barrier.

“Cara!” The woman is running now, but I’m well ahead of her, already standing on the edge ten meters from the small girl. I leap over the low fence, shove my feet in the loops and snap the bar down.

There’s a high pitched scream as Cara realizes she’s on the edge. Her balance at this age is not good enough to correct her mistake. She flails and disappears over the edge.

I’m only a split second behind her. I snatch the back of her clothing, thanking whoever makes these flying suits when the material holds.

Clinging to her with one arm, I force the trembling muscles of my free arm to pop the wings as I’ve felt Crystal and Hamish do before. I bring us back around to the nursery and fumble my way through a landing. The women are in various states of shock, except for Mona. Cara is squealing in delight, wriggling in my tight hold.

Mona takes her from me and gives her to the now sobbing blond woman who first spotted the toddler. Mona pulls me into a hug.

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” She pulls back. “The nets are there, but there have been incidents before. You know, broken necks. Parts of the net giving way.” She squeezes my shoulder again.

The nets. I’d completely forgotten about them. I’m a bit ashamed of my panic now. Though if what Mona says is true, the nets wouldn’t have assured Cara’s safety.

“Hey, Willow!” another young woman calls. “You flew! We all saw you.” The others shout their congratulations.

A wide grin spreads over my face. “You’re right. I did it!” I just soared.

I couldn’t wait to tell Hamish.

I don’t see Hamish that night and I don’t tell him about the incident yesterday as we fly to the Training Rock. Word doesn’t spread so quickly here. I add a mental point to the Bruma side.

I’ve started keeping tally.

“Are you alright?” he asks, watching me as I laugh at another of his comments.

I bite my cheek to stop the grin spreading and nod. “Maybe your jokes are just funny today. For once,” I say and lean back as he tries to flick my cheek.

I strap myself into my Soar when we get there and as he heads towards the edge of the first step I run in the opposite direction. To the side that falls into sheer nothingness - unless you hit the rocks on the way down first.

“Willow!” I hear his scream behind me.

I keep my legs straight and push the wings out.

I plunge out of sight, and then with a mighty push, I surge up above his head and circle him twice before landing near the edge. He’s frozen halfway through the process of strapping himself in.

“You just—” he splutters.

I beam at him. “I know! I did it by accident yesterday and now I’ve got the feel for it…” I trail off as his face falls.

“Do you know how much you just scared me?” he asks. His expression is like Kaura’s when I tell her off. It’s not angry. He looks at me like I’ve betrayed him. My grin slips.

“It was only meant as a joke, I apologize.” It’s something the fighters from the barracks would have found hilarious. Obviously, near death experiences don’t make Hamish laugh. I suppose the Outer Rings skewed my humor.

He narrows his eyes at me, but then sighs and drops his anger. Just like that. It’s incredible. He smiles and strolls toward me, inspecting his hand.

“I’ll forgive you,” he says. “But only if you—”

“Wait, let me guess,” I roll my eyes, “You want a kiss. Oh no, wait. Maybe you’ll say you want a pear and then kiss me anyway. Males. You’re so original.” I stop as I realize I sound crazy.

His face goes red and he stutters his reply. “N-no. I was going to say I’ll forgive you if you race me back to Isha’s.” I look at him as his face gets redder still with his obvious lie. My own cheeks are red from my rant, so I grin at him and tip off the cliff.

Even with a head start, he wins.

After this, my lessons speed up. He shows me the layout, the safest air paths between the rocks. He shows me how to navigate longer distances with the color gradient. This is how the Ire navigates the Oscala so easily. If you’re lost, you only need to soar to higher ground and find yourself again. It’s hard to see the colors in the middle. Hamish has taught me what they all mean. Orange near Osolis, to grey, to white near Glacium. And, as promised, he takes me exploring.

Jimmy comes with us. His mother is so thankful she almost cries. The pale, freckled boy zips around me. Hamish keeps calling him back and, a dozen times, my heart skips a beat whenever he comes within a breath of a rock face. Somehow he always pulls back in time. It’s like the Soar is a part of him.

“How is he so good at seven years old?” I yell to Hamish as the air rushes past us.

“Just a natural,” he shouts back.

We stop for the noon meal and I polish off every crumb. The fresh air makes me hungry, but I don’t drop in an exhausted heap in my tent at the end of the day anymore.

I tilt my head back so I can look straight up.

“You would never know there are a few hundred people up there. You can’t hear a thing,” I say.

Hamish lies back beside me. “Nope. The scouts say they get the occasional whisper of sound coming through during our Sunday celebrations. Of course we always make sure the pathway is empty before starting,”

“How long does it take to get from Glacium to Osolis?” I ask.

He purses his lips. “Two days. If you time it right. There’s the smoke to take into account.” I gape at him. Two days! It took me a month to walk the Oscala.

He continues. “I’ve never done it. Father doesn’t think I should get into trade.” The way he says this lets me know what he thinks about his father’s opinion. I know he usually tends the animals. I guess someone else has done this while he’s been teaching me to fly.

I wish I could launch into a discussion of how the Soars could revolutionize the communication between Glacium and Osolis. But I don’t know Hamish well enough to broach the subject yet. Especially considering secrecy is the Ire’s greatest code.

“That’s where I saw ‘em,” Jimmy interrupts, pointing over to a large spiraling rock.

Hamish has walked out of listening range. I follow the direction of his finger and start when I see we’re on the pathway. I didn’t notice how far down we’d flown. A thin, nearly forgotten memory bothers me. I latch onto it and it comes back to me. On the Oscala, I thought I was going crazy. Rock crevices started to look like Tellio lizards, and there was a flash of red one day, which I’d dismissed as another illusion. I wonder now if this was something after all. The red of Jimmy’s hair is a similar color. If so, it was lucky he wasn’t spotted by Malir or Rhone. They hadn’t been impeded by a veil.

“Jimmy.”

“Yeah?” he replies.

I have to phrase this carefully. “I don’t want you to disobey your mother by going exploring on your own,” I say. “But if you go along with others and spot something unusual, could you tell me?” I ask.

He thinks this over. I know what’s holding him back.

“Of course, no one would ever hear anything from me. You know, about where you, and the people you’ve gone with, have been.” He smiles at me, sticking out his chubby hand. I shake it with a laugh.

I chew my lip before adding, “Be careful.”

We fly far enough through the islands to get a look at the smoky barrier of Osolis. The smell of it brings a bursting desire to see my brothers. They sit underneath me somewhere. What are they doing? Are the twins still causing chaos for their nannies? Is Olandon still enjoying the attention of all the young women?  After an entire year, I am within sight of my world! I could slip away with the Soar. I still don’t have a veil. But I’ve seen several materials unique to Osolis since arriving here. The Ire might have the right fabric to make a new one. They do trade with both worlds after all.

“We better head back. It’s late,” Hamish says. I wrench myself away from the edge.

If this opportunity had come a year ago, I would have leaped at the chance handed to me. Now I’m almost certain if I return, I’ll be slaughtered by my mother. The thought is twisted, but no less true for being so.

The next evening at the weekly celebration, I once again find myself in complete disbelief as to how this village has escaped notice for so long. Adox’s father must have been very clever. I know Adox is.  He’s reasonable and gives good advice, isn’t prone to anger and rewards honesty and honor. He truly cherishes his people.

“You don’t need lessons anymore,” Adox says as I take a seat close to him.

I contain a smile. “No, I don’t.”

“Do you want to tell him, or should I?” he asks with a pointed look at Hamish.

I laugh softly, but I do feel a pang at losing Hamish’s regular companionship. “I’ll do it,” I say.

Adox echoes my laugh. “Good luck.” I wonder how old he is. He has nearly as many wrinkles as Aquin.

I look into the crackling fire which heats my skin. My thoughts quickly turn to my least favorite Bruma. Fire always reminds me of him. Of the way he makes me feel. I squeeze my eyes closed, trying to drive the thoughts away. Why won’t they go away?

“Who did you leave behind, young one?” he asks.

I clear my throat, not turning. “No one.”

An amused sound tells me what he thinks of my answer. “Well whoever ‘no one’ is, they must have held a big space in your heart to make you look so sad,” he says, rising slowly from his seat. I watch as he limps off, my heart falling in my chest.

I smile as I watch Hamish spin one of the women from the nursery around the dance floor. He catches me watching and winks. I jerk back from the fire, worried he’ll drag me up to dance again. I didn’t enjoy that experience at all.

He sprawls next to me a few minutes later, puffing for breath. With a chuckle, he throws a warm arm around my shoulders.

“Don’t worry, baby. It was just a dance,” he says.

“Don’t call me baby,” I snap. There’s only one person who has called me that, and I don’t appreciate the reminder. “You can dance with whomever you wish.” I stop talking. I sound like I’m insanely jealous. He grins at me and leans in. I quickly pull my head away.

“Come on, Willow. I’m sorry.”

I sigh and untangle myself from his arms. “Contrary to how it sounds, I really don’t care who you dance with. In fact, I hope you dance with many more women tonight and find some nice girl who will love you as you deserve. I’m going back to Isha’s,” I say as I clamber up from the low seat and move swiftly away from the dancing. I think I made myself pretty clear. If he didn’t get that hint, he was as dense as the rock under my feet.

“Willow, wait!” I turn to see Jimmy’s flash of red hair. I smile at the boy as he stands to attention.

“Jimmy, well met.” I smile at him.

He leans up against a rock and slides his eyes to me, arms folded. “So. You said you wanted to know if I saw anything,” he says casually. I grin at him and mimic his pose against the rock.

“Find anything interesting?” I ask, studying my nails.

“You can’t tell Mama.” I have to bite my tongue when he mimics my action. I assure him I won’t.

He blurts out his story. “I was out near Glacium and saw them take a man off the pathway,” he blurts.

“Who is ‘them’ Jimmy?”

He rolls his eyes. “The guards of course.” That’s unusual, but I’m not worried. I shrug.

“That’s what they’re meant to do,” I say, standing to swoop up my Soar.

“But do they normally find Solati?”

I whip my head back, freeze from where I’ve started strapping myself in. “What?”

“I know. They were dragging him off to the King. I heard them talking about it.”

I grip the boy’s shoulder. “How close were you? What did the man look like?” Jimmy looks up at me with wide eyes. I relax my grip.

“H-he had black hair, kind of like yours, how it’s a bit blue. His eyes were dark. I know because they called him Solati and I got real close and checked. He was thin, too. Kind of like my Uncle when he got sick,” he says.

I breathe in and out, trying to clear my head. It can’t be! It can’t be Olandon!

I shake my head and squeeze Jimmy’s shoulder absently. But what if it is?

“Thank you so much. You’ve done well,” I say. I fasten the chest strap with shaking hands. The man Jimmy’s described could be any of a hundred Solatis. But how many of these men had a reason to travel the Oscala? And how many have the same hair color?

I fly faster than I’ve ever flown before, landing on Isha’s island at a run, and throwing the Soar to the ground. There’s no one else here. They’re still at Adox’s. I pace back and forth, jerking my hands through my wind-blown hair. I stop at the edge of the island and look in the direction of Glacium, using the color gradient to guide me.

I take a couple of minutes to think my decision through. I inhale and release it slowly. Am I overreacting? It all depends on whether the man is my brother.

I make my choice.

I’ve got to go. It’s not worth the risk. It will take me back to the man I’ve grown desperate to avoid. But if it’s my brother and something has happened to him, I’ll never forgive myself.

Isha, Cris and Hamish touch down behind me.

Hamish rushes over. “We saw you run. What’s wrong?”

I shake my head and push his hands away, approaching Isha instead.

“Isha. I need some black material. The type I want is heavy, but you can see through it. Do you know the kind?” I ask.

She shares a glance with Cris. “Yes, we call it Videre.”

“I need some, about this much.” I show her with my hands. “Do you think you can get some for me? Quickly, I need it quickly,” I say. I want to grip her arms, but I clench my fists by my side.

“Well, of course, but what’s wrong? Won’t you tell us?”

I hesitate, about to say no, but I can’t just leave without an explanation. “I…a friend is in trouble. Please understand, I can’t tell you more than this.” I look at each of them and lower my eyes. “I’m sorry.” They are shocked, surprised, confused. I close my eyes and swallow.

Isha picks up a Soar and moves to the edge. “I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

“You’re not serious!” Hamish says incredulously.

“She saved my daughter’s life. Yes, I’m serious,” she says while strapping herself in. She disappears over the side.

“Could I please get some food for the journey? Just a little?” I ask Cris. He takes the hint and retreats to the dugout cave where they keep their supplies.

“You can’t do this. You can’t leave on your own,” Hamish says. I close my eyes, loathe to see his look of betrayal. It’s different. Running away from him. I knew Jovan could handle it. But Hamish just seems so breakable sometimes.