Feather Light (Knead Me) (14 page)

Parker sat up and leaned against the headboard, urging her to move up and rest her head on his chest. He trailed his fingers along her back before he spoke.

“It’s all I have. Imagine losing control of everything around you. The bedroom is a place where I can still have the command that was taken from me. I don’t expect you to fully understand my situation, but I’m just afraid that if I let it go on, I’m going to feel trapped because I didn’t say something earlier.”

She straightened and sat on her heels. “Are you getting rid of me already?”

The hurt in her voice stroked his ego. He smiled and shook his head. “I just want to make things clear on how I want to go about this . . . relationship. I know I said last night that I wanted us to find our ‘style’ together, but that doesn’t mean I’m ready to relinquish domination in the bedroom. You still have to follow my lead and do what I ask of you within your comfort zone.” Parker knew he sounded selfish for putting his need before hers, but this was important to him.

Ann paused. He could guess she was considering what he’d said.

“To be quite honest, I feel the same way you do: like I’m trapped, and my life is slipping from my grasp. But unlike you, I don’t have the need to control. Instead, I want a little quiet time, like what we’re having right now.”
 

“Why would you feel trapped?”
 

She sighed. “It’s a very long story. I promise I’ll tell you all about it when the time is right. For now, let’s just enjoy each other.”
 

Parker nodded in understanding and was relieved to hear she would soon entrust him with her secrets. He took her hand. “Since we’ve decided to just enjoy ourselves, let’s go to this little hole-in-the-wall favorite of mine. Their breakfast quesadillas are to die for.”

Ann faltered. “Um . . . I don’t feel like dressing up. Why don’t I whip up something for us? My sister says I make one of the best mushroom and Swiss cheese omelets there is. We can eat on the veranda and maybe take a walk on the beach.”

Parker recognized the signs of evasion
.
The first thing that came to mind was that she was embarrassed to be seen with a blind man. The thought made his stomach churn with disappointment. Was that one of the secrets that she was hiding from him? He chastised himself, remembering that Ann had promised to share everything with him as soon as she was ready. For now, he was going to take her sage advice and just enjoy the company.
 

“Sounds good to me.” He slapped her butt and eased her off him. “Now tell me—where the heck are my clothes?” When she moved away, he planted his feet on the cold hardwood floor. Parker heard her footsteps as she made her way to the bathroom and returned with his clothes.

“There’s a new toothbrush on the vanity for you,” she said before closing the bathroom door. “I’ll be in the kitchen. Just holler if you need help finding your way around,” she added before her footsteps faded away.

“Thanks.” Parker felt for his phone in his jeans pocket and activated the time. Then he listened to the voice-over announce eight text messages, five missed calls from Cork, and three from his father. “Oh shit,” he muttered. He pressed the speed dial and slipped into his jeans while he waited. Parker heard movement in the bathroom and figured Ann was getting her morning ritual underway.

Cork answered on the third ring. “Dude, did you even make it home?”

“Good morning, baby bro. What’s with the inquisition? Last I checked, I was born two years, seven months, and several hours ahead of you. That makes you unqualified to give me the third degree.”
 

His brother ignored his teasing. “Mom’s worried about you, and Dad’s called several times wanting me to report you as missing when you didn’t answer my calls or texts.”

Parker rolled his eyes. His parents had been as solid as Cork had been when his blindness had unleashed its fury. But regardless, they still treated him like he was a child. His mother, Dorothy, had often requested that he inform them of his activities, not because they wanted to meddle but more for their own peace of mind. Their constant worrying about his safety was unnecessary, even if he refused to use a guide dog or even a walking stick.
 

“Um . . . I lost track of time.”
That was
an understatement!

“I was calling to tell you that, since you ‘lost track of time,’ Mom canceled the barbecue. She wants us to meet her and Dad for dinner tonight. They want to celebrate. It sounds like they have some good news. I’ll pick you up at seven.” Cork wasn’t going to be deterred by any feeble excuses.

Parker groaned. He wanted to stay with Ann, but there was no getting out of this dinner with his parents. “Fine, I’ll see you then.”

After they hung up, Parker made his way to the bathroom and brushed his teeth. Feeling a bit out of his element in an unfamiliar house, he sighed before venturing outside the bedroom. It should be simple. All he had to do was to use the walls to feel his way around. Of course, most things were easier said than done. As soon as he took the first steps out of Ann’s bedroom, he tripped over something on the floor. There was no way to stop the fall. All he could do was protect his head with one arm and try to break his fall with the other. He landed on the floor with a loud thud.

Parker heard footsteps running in his direction. “Oh my, are you okay?” Ann rushed to his side. He felt around, reaching blindly until his fingers closed over the culprit—something small and smooth that felt like glass.

“Oh, Parker, I’m so sorry. I forgot about the candleholders. Let me get the rest of these out of your way.”
 

He gritted his teeth and tried to calm down. Then he pushed himself up using the wall as a guide.

“Are you okay?” Ann held his arm, leading him forward.
 

It’s just my pride that’s hurt,
he wanted to say. “I’m fine. Don’t worry. It’s not your fault. It’s hard to blind-proof a house.” Parker tried to lighten his statement, but it still came out sounding stiff. “Just walk ahead and I’ll follow you.” 

Ann hesitated before starting out. “It will take about ten feet to reach the kitchen, which is to your left. You’ll pass the dining room on your right. I’m going to turn on the lights so you can at least see the doorway and the two big vases on either side of it.”
 

He was grateful for her clear instructions, and it touched him when she didn’t stick around and hover over him. That would have been mortifying. He took a moment to compose himself before starting off down the hallway again. It wasn’t every day he made a fool of himself in front of people. This one stung more because it magnified his problem. Taking a deep breath, Parker began to count and walk in the direction of the whisking sound until he was standing next to Ann.

“Can I help?” he offered, trying to put the incident behind him. His male pride had not only taken a beating, but he’d also embarrassed the hell out of himself in front of the woman he wanted to impress.
Way to go, Parker!
 

She kept beating the eggs but stood on tiptoe to reach his mouth with a kiss. “Sure. Can you make coffee?”

“Tell me where to find things.” He smiled in her direction, loving the way she made him feel needed.

“To your right, about six steps, you’ll stand face-to-face with the cupboard. On the second shelf, you’ll find the coffee filters. The coffee is in the freezer. Starbucks okay with you? The fridge is behind you, by the way.”
 

“Oh, yeah. Where’s the coffee maker?”

“Right here.” Ann took his hand and guided it along the counter until he felt the coffee maker.

Once the coffee was set up, Parker sat on the barstool and listened to Ann’s movements, following her outline while she started the omelet. “So this is where you live?” he asked, hoping to get a good conversation going—anything to find out more about her.

“Yeah. I have another house, but I like it here. I love living close to the water and the fact that it’s private.” She sounded wistful, and he wanted to hold her in his arms, to ease whatever ailed her.

“Private?”

Because of his blindness, he depended on people to describe certain places to him. In this instance, he had no idea what she was talking about. 

“The whole one-mile stretch is private, so only the owners and their guests are allowed to enter the estate. There’s a security gate at the entrance to keep out unwanted guests.” There was a hint of triumph in the way she explained the area, another addition to his growing list of questions about the mystery surrounding Ann.

“I take it you like your privacy?” The aroma of the eggs cooking wafted around them, and he followed the inviting scent with his nose.
 

“Who doesn’t like privacy?”
 

Parker thought of what else he could ask her. “What do you do when you’re home? Do you have any hobbies?
 

“Oh, I like to read and watch old movies. And when I find the time, I enjoy a leisurely run and long walks. Anyway, I don’t have anything planned for the rest of the day. I was hoping we could rent a movie after taking a walk on the beach.”
 

Parker chuckled at her invitation. It was always a welcome change when people forgot about his vision impairment. “I’d love to . . . oh crap!” He smacked his forehead, remembering the dinner with his family.

“What’s going on?”

“Christ. I was just talking to my brother. My parents arranged for the four of us to have dinner tonight.” Groaning, he wished he could cancel but knew his mother would be disappointed if he did. 

“Time with family’s always important. Why don’t you give me your address, and I’ll come by your place tomorrow? That is, if you want me to.”

Before he had a chance to answer, Parker heard the doors open, and salty air breezed in.

“Join me out here on the veranda. I’m about thirteen steps from where you are. Just watch out for the little bump on the floor by the door.”
 

Parker smiled at her attention to detail and was grateful that she hadn’t coddled him or made him feel like a total freak.

“Thanks.” He followed the tantalizing sound of the ocean and was surprised by the feel of the wind in his face.

“I have a run scheduled with a friend of mine at the track in the morning. Any time after lunch is fine with me. I’ll text my address to you right now.”

He settled into one of the cushioned patio chairs and inhaled the fresh air. After a long indulgent moment, Parking pulled out his cell phone and started texting the information to Ann via the voice-over application.

“Can you imagine if you didn’t have the technology we have now? Coffee is next to your plate. Right side.”

Parker looked up and smiled. “I would be living in the dark ages, no doubt about it. I guess, in a way, the timing is better.”

It wasn’t a joke. He and Cork had talked about the what-ifs, if his disease had struck maybe ten years earlier. There would have been no screen reader to aid him in using the computer and no voice-over to stay connected through texting.

“How do you know so much about locating techniques?”

“Let’s just say I was curious.” Ann took his hand and placed it on her face. “I read a few articles after I met you.”

Touched at her effort, this gave him the opening he needed to ask her an important question.
How
does it feel to make love with a blind man?
But he couldn’t bring himself to put it in those exact words. Parker tamped down his insecurity and took a deep breath. “Does it bother you that I can’t see you?”

There was no hint of hesitation when Ann answered. “Not one bit. And contrary to what others might think, I believe you can see better than most people. You’re more aware of those around you and in tune with their feelings. Does that answer your question?”

Not all of it.
“Yeah.”

He would’ve preferred she elaborate on how she felt about him and, to be more specific, his blindness, but that could push her away. Parker wasn’t ready for that, so he nodded his head and concentrated on her movements.

“Coffee is at one o’clock, and fork is at nine. The omelet is plump, the size of a burrito. How would you like your coffee?”

“Just black. Thanks.” He placed his phone in his pocket and picked up the fork. “Oh, is there any ketchup?”

“Here you go.”

Parker lifted the lid and felt around his plate for a spot to squirt the ketchup. He gave the bottle a shake and pumped some out. There was a sucking sound before the thick stuff splattered all over his face, and he assumed, on his shirt and the table. Ann laughed and moved closer.

“Look at you. You’re a mess.” She pressed a napkin into his hand. “Let me get the stuff off of your face first.

Instead of wiping his face with a napkin, Ann kissed every inch of it, dabbing her lips on every spot where the ketchup had landed. His heart rate soared at the erotic act, and he dragged her across his lap.

“If you don’t stop what you’re doing, I doubt we’ll be able to even touch our breakfast.” Parker’s voice came out raspy, arousal lacing every syllable.

Ann laughed and pressed her mouth to his, teasing and probing. She wound her arms around his neck and molded her body closer. Parker more than obliged, liking the idea of this woman being unable to keep her hands off him.