Final Surrender (8 page)

“What are you laughing at?” Angela asked as she tried to hide a yawn behind her hand.

“Not only did I kidnap you from your senior prom, make you kick your date to the curb and bring you back to my apartment so I could have my way with you, I took your virginity too. I must be insane or just determined to go to hell.”

Angela poked him in the ribs, smiling as he caught her hand and brought her fingertips up to his mouth, kissing each one in turn.

He shook his head and pulled Angela closer. He was getting hard again just thinking about her naked body pressed against to his.

He had wanted her for so long that he was nowhere close to being sated tonight. Shaking his head, he desperately tried to erect the wall that had kept him separate from her for all this time.

Her body he would treasure, but her heart? He didn’t know what the hell to do with that. Nothing but break it. Just like his parents had done to him. To themselves.

Love, honor and cherish. Right. ’Til things get hard. Then you just bail—

“Clay?” she questioned in a sleepy voice.

“Mmm…”

“Love you.” She slipped off into unconsciousness in the abject silence that followed. She had said it before, but he knew it meant something completely different coming from her tonight. Now. After he had taken her.

What in the world have I done?

He suddenly felt the need to flee, but with her body plastered against his, he couldn’t do anything without waking her.
Do I really want to walk away?

Damn
, was all he could think as he grabbed his two bags. Heading toward Angela’s conference room, he followed behind the woman he never stopped wanting and the best friend that stood in the way.

Chapter Eight

Angela took a seat at the head of the conference room table, sipping on a cup of coffee she couldn’t taste. Her mind was too focused on Clay. Not to mention, she needed the jolt of caffeine seeing as though she got no sleep the night before.

Damn her brother for putting her in this situation, and double damn herself for not taking care of it months, weeks, or even days before Mark decided to ride in on his white horse to fix it for her.

She eyed him as he sat next to her, and tried to keep the
screw you
mask from taking over her face. “I know you aren’t gung ho about this, Angela, but after talking to Clay you’ll be as sure as I am that he can protect you.”

Not wanting to waste any time, she set her cup down, turning her attention to Clay, who sat on the other side of the table.
God, his eyes.
He looked calm and unaffected by their reunion and she wanted to
accidentally
kick him in the shins, but she tightly crossed her ankles instead.

“And what do you think, Mr. Waters? Can you protect me?” she said through gritted teeth, not caring at all about his response.

Mark ran his fingers through his hair. “You’re being rather…formal.”

“Quite,” was all she admitted to.

Clay stared back at her, strategically maneuvering her with his response, she was certain, or counting sheep for all she cared.

“Yes I believe I can, my reputation speaks for itself, and the name is Clay if you don’t mind,” he added nonchalantly. His attention so focused it unnerved her. His mouth quirked into a crooked grin before he could hide it. The slight blush filling her cheeks did nothing but piss her off.

Cool, calm, collected. Just a few more minutes of this inane chitchat and you can tell him where to shove it.

“My military service has allowed me to hone my skills in training scenarios and full combat. I’ve been back in the public sector for several years and any of my clients will speak for me on my professionalism and work ethic. I don’t shy away from threats or danger easily—”

“Why come here, why take this job so far away from home, Mr. Waters? I’m sure there are people in Texas worth protecting?” She stated it as a question instead of a comment. Curious to know what he left behind, but couldn’t come right out and ask about his personal life. God forbid he think she showed any interest in him…since she didn’t care. At all.

“Nothing my partner can’t handle,” he asserted, with a shrug. “And again, it’s Clay.” He never got ruffled, never shifted in his chair. No looking around, no fidgeting of any kind. He was like a robot. A gorgeous, smoldering, hunk of man that already had her panties wet. His attention was a heated caress over every inch of skin he touched with his eyes.

His eyes…

They taunted hers as the two stared each other down, neither one willing to give an inch.

“What is your greatest accomplishment?” slipped out before she could stop herself.

Without hesitation, he responded. “Saving seventeen of my men on my fourth tour in Iraq when we ran headlong into a…trap.”

His voice was even, but she could sense his pride.

The connection she had with him was still there, and she loved and hated it all at the same time.

“What is your greatest failure?”

He hesitated. Just for a moment he broke eye contact, and her breath stuck in her lungs waiting for his answer.

Oh, God, please don’t say it…

“Not being able to save the other men I lost that day,” was the answer he finally gave.

Every question she asked, she wanted answered in a different way, about a different time. A different them. But she didn’t want to know. Not really. His answers wouldn’t fix anything. And she could never apologize enough for…

She shook her head to try to clear it.

This would never work. They could never be honest with each other. Too much had already happened between them for them to be able to start over. So much he didn’t know…

She exhaled loudly, wondering why she didn’t just put an end to this now. What was the point?

Because you still love him
, her broken heart whispered.

He was a good man and a true friend of Mark’s if he came all this way. He was a man of worth but she didn’t want to see that. He was gorgeous and strong and she knew he could protect anyone in the world. But she didn’t think she could keep him close enough to protect her. He’d find out the truth. Sooner or later she’d slip up and he would hate her for it. She couldn’t live with that.

All she wanted to see was a different person than the boy she fell in love with so long ago.

Love. She almost snorted at the thought. What had love ever gotten her?

Mark slid a file across the table to Angela during the momentary cease-fire.

“Here are all the references Clay provided. He’s good at security and does each job thoroughly,” Mark stated matter-of-factly.

He continued as Angela picked up the folder, perusing the pages with quiet intensity. “His background check is also there, his discharge papers from the military, copies of his licenses from Texas and his new ones from New York.”

“You have both been quite thorough, I see,” Angela accused, but couldn’t wrap her head around just how thorough they had been. They’d backed her into a corner and she wanted to bare her teeth at them.

She knew Mark wanted her to be safe, but this was a bit much. Her mind was tumbling end over end like she was on a roller coaster. After closing the folder and placing it back on the table, she clasped her hands together so they couldn’t see them shake.

It’s just the caffeine
, she lied to herself. “I appreciate the help here, Mark, but why all the hoopla?” She glared at him as she finished. “Security is only going to be watching me when I go out, so why can’t we find someone local that already knows about New York and life here in general? Mr. Waters will have to acclimate himself here for just a part-time position that I’m still not convinced I need at all. What else do you expect him to do when I’m not out and about needing a babysitter?”

Her eyes narrowed on him as she saw Mark’s mouth open and then close. She could tell he didn’t exactly know what to say, and God help him if he did what she thought he did. “Mark, what am I missing here? Just lay it on the line. I’m sure I can take it,” she boasted behind a feral smile that probably looked more like a baring of teeth.

“You’ll be his only client, Angela,” Mark finally said as he found his voice.

“How could I be his only client, if I only need him…sporadically?” She hated to use the word
needed
as she gestured toward Clay, who had stood up to stare out the window. Guess Mark was on his own then. Didn’t look like Clay thought any more of it than she did.

Mark swiveled his chair around to face hers. “Well, it’s now or never, I guess, Ang.” He took a deep breath. “I think it would be in your best interest if he stayed here, in your guest room, so he can protect you all the time. We want him with you twenty-four/seven. I don’t want something to happen to you here, or while you’re out somewhere.” He glanced at the gash on her wrist she’d left exposed on the table.

Angela stared back at him for what seemed like an hour until she actually snorted. She looked over at Clay and saw him watching her again. He nodded once, and then looked back out the window.

He knew.

They were both in on it from the beginning and she’d been the last to know. If Clay already had his licenses approved in New York, which she knew didn’t come cheaply or quickly, they must have been planning this for a while.

But why?

Oh, she lamented the decision to leave this in Mark’s hands. She now found herself lost in more than a bad dream, when she could have avoided all of it by taking matters into her own hands. All she would’ve had to do was find a security company on her own. Simple. Easy. She’d had plenty of time to do it. Instead she chose to bury her head in the sand, leaving her ass exposed to…this.

She stood and turned her back on both of them, rubbing her temples again, the migraine even closer than it had been the day before.

“How long have you been planning this? Obviously long enough that you’re trying to make it impossible for me to back out.”

Mark stood, rubbing her arms, which she had tightly laced together in front of her chest. “Long enough for Clay, his partner and myself to be granted concealed carry licenses. Those take a while.” He tried to joke.

Didn’t get him anywhere.

“I don’t like being handled, Mark.” He tried to work out her tight muscles as she shook him off. Nothing could soothe her right now, and she didn’t want to be touched. She looked up into his eyes, beseeching him to understand everything that she couldn’t say.

“I know, Ang, but you weren’t willing to see reason. You are a very high-profile designer with someone threatening you. You need security and you need it now, in-house.”

Louder for Clay to hear she said, “I don’t know him well enough to let him sleep in my house. Is he even housebroken?”

Petty? Sure. But it made her feel better to be on the throwing end of insults.

She saw Clay stiffen at her caustic remark, and a sense of satisfaction warmed her insides before they turned to jittery ice in her stomach.

“And it sounds like his talent and time would be better utilized somewhere else. This isn’t a dire situation, Mark.”

“He is very professional, Ang, and he’s practically been in the family for two decades. He’s like a brother to me and I know he thinks of you as a sister.”

Angela couldn’t help the tightening in her chest at that remark.

She knew Mark meant the comment to be comforting, but disappointment threatened to swamp her instead.

A sister. Is that all he thinks of me? He’s doing his best friend a favor and I’m just supposed to grovel and appreciate it?

Angela shook her head as she opened her mouth to protest, when a shrill ring went off in Mark’s pocket. He looked down at his cell phone, exhaling loudly. Angela glared at him and whoever the hell was calling.

“It’s Clare, I’ll just be a minute,” he said as he opened the phone and walked towards the door.

“Be nice,” he mouthed to Angela as he left the room and said, “Hi, babe, how are you and the kids?” with a bit too much fake enthusiasm. The door closing behind him sounded like the death knell at a funeral.

The silence was deafening, after the click of the door latch snapped into place.

Angela stared at the door, harsh breathing echoing in her lungs as an acute sense of tunnel vision slowly crowded her sight.

She didn’t want to be here, not with Clay. Not with him alone. With no protection from the man that was supposed to be her protector, the one man who had the ability to rip her heart out. And now, she was being asked to put her life in his hands.
Willingly?

As if in slow motion, she shifted her weight to one foot, to take the first step to the door. A silky-warm voice only a breath behind her whispered, “Will you give me a minute? Just one minute to explain, before you walk out on me
again
?”

She never heard him move in behind her. No wonder with the blood rushing in her head like a tidal wave.

No
, her mind screamed. She wouldn’t give him a moment to tell her why she still wasn’t good enough, but her body betrayed her and stopped trying to escape from his warmth. She ground her teeth together to the point of pain.

“I don’t know what you could say that would make me change my mind.”

His knuckles grazed the top of her backside, before he settled his hands on her hips gently to pull her against him.

Before she gave it a second thought she unwound her arms, reached back and grabbed handfuls of his slacks, so he couldn’t back up unless she allowed it.

She took a deep breath, feeling his erection tucked against her backside. His cologne permeated her insides. Searing his nostalgic musk into her brain just as she remembered it. Like the outdoors, and her after she made love to him, and something else exotic she wanted to taste.

“Why?” she asked. It was the only thing she wanted to know. “Why did you come here after all this time? I was fine with my life,” she continued. “I was fine…”

“I had to come,” he whispered in her ear. “Mark said you were in trouble, so I came. Let me help, Angela. This is what I do and I want to help you find the…answers you need.”

His breath tickled her skin. While he kissed down her neck and shoulder she wondered what answers he would truly be willing to give her. Her head seemed to angle away from him of its own volition, allowing him greater access to her creamy skin.

“The answers I need.” She wanted to ask him for clarification on what questions he would answer for her, but she bit her lip instead. Taking a deep breath, she tried to move away but he moved with her. “So you came for Mark, because he asked you to? I don’t want answers. I just want my life to stay just that. Mine,” she replied a bit more breathless than she intended. All she wanted was to sound defiant and self-assured. Sex kitten came out instead.

“Can’t you give me a chance to protect you? Can’t you let me make this right?” he asked.

“There isn’t anything to make right. Nothing happened before. Nothing,” she whispered with a shake of her head. She’d told herself that so many times, she wished she believed it.

If she didn’t pull away from him and the delicious sensations of arousal behind her, not to mention the gentle kneading he was bestowing on her hips and stomach, she would melt into him.

She wouldn’t be able to say no to anything he wanted. She would lose herself in him again and she knew it. She had to be her own woman and she had to decide what she wanted, or at least what she could live with afterwards.

She took a shaky step away from his heat and wound her arms protectively across her chest again as she turned around.

Facing him was so hard, as he stood there watching her every move with his hands stuffed in his pockets. She would have thought him nonplussed by her entirely if she hadn’t just rubbed against his straining erection.
Hot, thick…oh, God…