“We had planned long before you were born to create someone who had more Fallen DNA than human. We were trying to create a fallen with a soul, in a sense, to save us or to save our children. And yes, I loved you the second I saw you. I hated myself for what I had done to you and your mother. Damning your souls…” His voice weighed with guilt. Cole excused himself quietly from the room, eyes locked on mine as he exited with reassurance that I could do this on my own and if not, he was nearby. I also knew that he was close enough to hear every word still.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“No, Alice. You have every right. It is the human thing to do and you are in fact human.”
“What you need me to do?” I knew there was no going back to my life before and I honestly didn’t want to.
“We need to strategize a plan. They will be coming for you and if we plan carefully, we may at least be able to fight this battle on our terms.” I sat studying his face, looking for flaws and an entry into his thoughts. I was sure they had a plan for this battle before I ever existed, not that he planned to tell me. This time, there was no flaw in his defenses; he was aware of my ability and would smokescreen any possible entry into his thoughts. I nodded in acceptance for now and excused myself from the conversation.
I headed to my room to find some comfort in Cole’s arms. I walked in to see him sitting on our bed on my laptop. He smiled and set it aside, patting the space on the bed next to him. I climbed into his arms, letting all he was consume me. We had to survive this.
I walked into the bar with a new sense of worth. I gave Max a much deserved hug as he headed home for the night. I went into the shift in a fairly good mood. I waited until Jasmine, Jake, Camille, and the random patrons headed home to talk to Old Gray. I did my usual walk through cleaning up after the drunks of the day, waiting for the meeting my father called for to begin. I walked up to the empty bar stool next to Old Gray while Cole and Paul moved chairs and tables to accommodate our future visitors.
“I couldn’t tell you anything Alice. All I could do was watch over you. If I involved myself, they would’ve found you much sooner,” he said.
“I understand why you weren’t able to tell me who I was or what was coming for me. What I don’t understand is why you didn’t tell me after I was attacked. You had to know what or who attacked me.” I was furious at him. He needed to know he had not yet earned my trust back and that it wasn’t going to be easy either.
“I know you don’t want to hear this but your existence is not supposed to be possible. I didn’t want to get attached to you in any way, knowing you could and most likely would be killed. I do regret that now and against my will, I have grown quite fond of you. I’ve watched you struggle and I knew you could handle it on your own. Don’t let our kind fool you, Alice. We are not good or honorable. We just want to exist; we want to go home to a place we can never enter. You are the only thing keeping us from our final punishment. I do care for you deeply and I will do all I can to protect you, but I do so with my own purpose. I refuse to lie to you about that. You deserve more.”
I nodded, excusing myself from the truth that had just slapped me across the face. I knew he was right and though they may have all cared for me, even loved me, my existence and their protection of me was for their own survival. I snuck out the back past a few strange and breathtaking men who were obviously fallen angels, with their perfect skin and beaming eyes. They glanced at me as they passed me into the bar. I quickly ran over to Cole’s car, wishing my own was here with my not-so-secret cigarette stash. I checked his glove box—knowing it would be empty—only to find an unopened pack of cigarettes and a lighter with a note saying
Just breathe. I love you
. I felt myself smiling down to the tips of my toes.
I lit one, leaning against Cole’s car and watched car after car pull into the parking lot. Some were beat up muscle cars; some looked like they just drove off the dealership lot. I watched people walking in from the street as if they just appeared there. Each one took a moment to glance at me before entering the bar. I could feel their mixed emotions, fear crawling over them like insects. I saw Jake pull back into the bar, shaking hands with someone he apparently knew. I waited until the last of them entered and came in behind them, locking the door.
The meeting had not started yet but Old Gray and Paul were starting to calm the room down to begin. A man with dark, wavy hair and a gorgeous jawline glided in front of me before I fully entered the room. He looked me up and down, studying me and wrinkling his forehead similar to the way Cole did. “Mr. Corvus?” I asked. He let out a chuckle as I scanned the room for Cole, who was already winding his way through the crowd toward us.
“Hello, Alice. My name is Kokabiel, but yes—I suppose I am Mr. Corvus.” His smile was as infectious as Cole’s; I could see where he got it from. “Cole, I was just introducing myself to your girlfriend.” His eyes looked as displeased as all the others did.
“And now you have.” He took my hand and led me toward Paul.
“Nice to meet you,” I said as I slipped backward through the crowd.
I took a seat in the corner at the nearest table to Paul and Old Gray. Cole sat next to me, blocking me protectively from the room filled with fallen angels.
Relax, Cole.
I tightened the grip on his hand under the table. He tried to smile but his nerves leaked through. Paul began the meeting and I studied the crowd for reactions as he told them the day had come for their battle against the angels, against those they once considered their brothers and sisters. I felt the uneasiness in the room like thick smog in my lungs.
I listened as he explained who and what I was. Some relaxed from the news, finding comfort in my existence and maybe even a drop of hope. Others started to panic under their thick skin that their end was much nearer than they had thought just days ago. As the panic grew during Paul’s speech, I felt it crawling under my skin like a parasite. My body began to feel a light tremble I couldn’t seem to control. Their emotions were much stronger to me, or maybe they were just clearer. It made it that much more nauseating for me. Cole’s hand clenched harder on my own and I knew it was affecting him too. We needed all of them if we stood a chance against the angels.
I took a deep breath, attempting to not choke on the thick air as it climbed into my lungs. The room froze and I stood up, crawled over Cole, and stood directly in front of Paul. I closed my eyes with hope I could ease enough of their fears before their fears choked Cole and I, dropping us to the ground before the battle even began. I looked around as the room turned into an eerie silence. Paul stopped mid-sentence in shock to see me standing in front of him.
“I would appreciate it if you could all take a moment to gather yourselves. The panic twisting inside of some of you is agitating and makes it difficult for me to hear Penemue’s plan. Obviously, by my most recent action, you will find I am an asset to you. If that does not convince you, I not only lived through a beating from a bounty hunter but from an angel sent to kill me as well. Please excuse me while you finish your meeting.” My voice was powerful and filled with ease. I tried not to let it startle me.
I walked past the room of beautiful strangers. I turned back, nodding to Paul to continue and glanced at Cole, hoping my eyes were enough of an invitation to join me outside. I already knew what Paul was going to discuss with them and I didn’t think I could handle a moment more of their panic. Panic from an angel is like thousands of nails on a single chalkboard. As I heard the door close behind me, a beautiful ocean breeze brushed over me and I turned into Cole’s embrace.
After my abrupt demonstration, all of those who attended the meeting were on board. They would pass word to those who had previously worked on the plan of my existence to save themselves and their children. Over the last few days, they began to arrive, the Fallen and their children, my fellow nephilim. I watched from my bedroom window as more and more damned souls and their sires strolled onto my property. Today I would learn how to fight like an angel.
I walked into my kitchen, which now had a less than homey feel to it, to find all of the major players arguing over the strategy. Normally this would have dropped me to my knees in agony to have so many fallen angels letting their emotions climb so high. Old Gray had been teaching me how to push it from me so I could see it, hear it and if I chose to feel it, do so. I hadn’t yet quite gotten the hang of it but I was getting better. It was nice to not be so overwhelmed by others emotions. It was like someone shining a bright light in your face while having a constant migraine with no medication available.
“Stop!” Even this I couldn’t push far enough away from me. “What are you arguing about?” I demanded.
“I was explaining that when the day arrives, all the nephilim will have to be with us at the field. It is the only way to protect them and you,” Paul said frankly.
“The point of all of this is to protect them, to keep them safe and invisible to the angels. If we do that, we will be putting a target on every single one of them. They will be as good as dead,” Old Gray retorted.
“Penemue is right. If we split up, they will come to kill the nephilim first and then come back for Alice. We need to stay together so we can defend our children, protect her, and fight our brothers. This is the only way,” Kokabiel said.
“Alice doesn’t even know how to fight! How is she supposed to survive a full battle against an army of angels with the fear of over five dozen nephilim clawing at her? She’s lucky that most Fallen go to a surreal, calm place when fighting,” Jake argued.
“I agree with Penemue and Kokabiel. We need to stay together. I’m getting better at dealing with all of your emotions, especially when so many Fallen and nephilim are within a hundred yards of my front door,” I said, knowing I would be the deciding vote.
“Alice, we will be giving them a death sentence,” Cole said with pain in his eyes.
“No, Cole. They gave us all a death sentence before this ever started. This will give them all a chance to survive.” I pointed at the table filled with the Fallen. I knew it hurt them and I was glad. All I ever wanted was to be loved. I didn’t want some epic destiny where my soul was damned because my father and grandfather were fallen angels and I had to fight in an attempt to save us all.
“Cole, if you want to get a group of fallen to help you, I will allow you to stay behind and protect them. Even though I think it is the wrong choice. You can stay behind and protect your kind or we can all fight and you and Alice can fight together,” his father said coldly. Everyone knew Cole would never let me go into this fight without him. We all knew most of us wouldn’t survive it, including Cole and myself. Cole broke the new tie only because he was unable to stay behind while I fought.
I stood cautiously in my backyard, grasping onto a surprisingly heavy sword and staring into my father’s eyes. Every day for hours, we stood out there swinging swords at each other. Finally, after a week, my arms didn’t feel as distressed as they had in the beginning. Other Fallen taught their children, even though they knew that if an angel got close enough to them, they are dead. The worst advantage the angels had on me was their in-flight attack. I had tried to make wings emerge from my own back; still nothing. I had tried everything Old Gray had taught me. I was beginning to think I was land bound indefinitely.
I’d learned to watch his body as he came toward me. If I watched carefully, I could see what muscles flexed and knew how and where he would strike his next blow. Just as he swung his sword down toward me, I heard a faint sound of branches cracking from behind me. Instead of blocking the shot, I dove in the other direction to find Jake behind me, his sword crashing down above me. The three of us circled as I waited for the attack. The most important thing I’d learned is that angels had battled more times than I could ever dream of and I needed to stay calm and watch for an opening. Paul said to react, not act, unless a perfect opening arose.