For the Love of Gracie (21 page)

He pushed my hand closer to my mouth. I took a small bite. The flavor erupted in my mouth. It was greasy and delicious. The best food always was in the South. 

We ate everything on our plates.  I leaned back with my hands holding my stomach. "Ugh, I'm so full. This was amazing." 

Ashton's hand pressed against my cheek, turning my face toward him. He leaned down and his tongue slid across the corner of my mouth before he kissed me. The kiss sent electric tingles all the way to my toes. My eyes stayed closed, for a moment, as I delight
ed in the feelings my body was experiencing. 

He snickered. "Ketchup, on the corner of your mouth." 

In a daze, I said, "Wow. I like that better than using a napkin any day." 

He slid out of the booth and grabbed my hand to help me out. 

"Let me get this," I said as we approached the register. 

He caught my hand before I could pull my wallet out. "Absolutely not! This is our first official date. I'm not letting you pay." 

"Where to now?" 

He held the door again. I stepped out onto the sidewalk and he tugged me toward the park.  There was a concrete platform, shaped liked the front end of a boat, in the park.  An older couple was sitting on a bench in front of it. Ashton handed them his phone and dragged me up on top of the 'boat.' 

"What are they doing with your phone?" 

He snickered suspiciously. We ran up the stairs to stand and lookout at the park. Ashton dragged me to the edge and placed me in front of him. He grabbed my arms and raised them straight up, using caution with my sore arm. I stood there, confused, with my arms held out to the side. He put his arms around my waist first and kissed my cheek. The woman below was either taking pictures or videoing this, I couldn’t tell. 

He raised his arms, in the same fashion as mine, and screamed, "I'm the King of the World." 

Once I realized that he was mimicking Leonardo DiCaprio's line in
Titanic
, I bent forward in a fit of laughter. His hands grabbed my waist to keep me from falling. I heard his laughter echo in my ears as he held me. 

"I've always wanted to do that," he said.

Ashton helped me back down and we took his phone back.

When the woman handed it to us, 
\she said, "You two make the sweetest couple.  When's the big day?" 

I looked to Ashton for comprehension. 

He pulled me close, kissing my cheek. "No date yet, but soon, we hope." 

She smiled and pointed at her husband. "You remind me of how we were at your age. My Arthur and I have been married for sixty years. I hope you two are as happy as we were back then, and as we are now."

Ashton took her hand and kissed it. "Thank you again for the video." 

She nodded and went back to her husband. 

It hit me what she was asking us. "She thought we were engaged?" 

He nodded as he slid his arms around my waist. "You acted like we were. Why?" 

He lowered his head, pressing his lips to mine softly. He dropped to one knee, my breath caught in my throat, and I panicked. 

"Ash…we…I…" 

He burst into laughter and said, "Gotcha!" 

He took off running. I chased him clear across the park. His legs were so much longer than mine that he was never within reach. I caught up to him as he sat on a swing. He looked at his watch

"'Bout time you caught up!" He winked. 

I flopped down on his lap. "You're a shameless teaser." I kissed his cheek and leaned down to whisper in his ear, "I'd have said yes, if you meant it."

I couldn’t decipher how he felt about my confession, his face was unreadable.

He reached into his pocket and his hand came out closed over something. "Nothing would make me happier than to marry you, Gracie." 

I held my breath. 

“I don’t have a ring, but I do have something for you.” He placed his fist out, turned it over unclenching his fingers. In his grasp was a silver charm of a cowboy boot.
 

“This is for your bracelet. It’s to represent our night playing pool. That was one of my favorite memories. It was the first night you slept in my arms. You fell asleep shortly after the movie started and you curled up against my chest. I was pretty stunned at first and thought about moving you so that you didn’t wake up embarrassed. Then you ran your hands up my chest and said my name and I couldn’t move. It felt too homey.”

I laughed. “Sheesh, all I do is molest you in my sleep!”

With the sexiest smirk he replied, “You won’t hear me complain about that.”
 

I leaned in and said, “You whispered my name in your sleep that night.”
 

He grinned. “I remember the dream too. I'll just say that my pool table had never seen so much action."

Ashton's arm pressed against my back, pulling me closer. I rested my palm against his cheek as I kissed him.

My phone rang, interrupting the moment.  I didn’t recognize the number.  "Give me one second."

I stood up and walked away to take the call. "Hello?" 

The voice on the other line asked, "Gracie Walker?"

I replied, "Yes, that’s me." 

The voice said, "I'm calling from Baptist Hospital, we have your test results.
”

The next words stopped my heart completely.  "Your tests came back clean.  There was one positive though. You're pregnant. I hope this is happy news." 

All I could say was, "Thanks." 

Ash moved to my side. "What is it, Gracie?"

I handed him back the charm bracelet. "You don’t want me to have this…I'm tainted. There is no happily ever after for me." 

I couldn’t think straight, so I turned and ran. I didn’t know where I was running or why. I needed to get away from Ashton, my happiness. I wasn’t destined for happiness; that was becoming abundantly clear. Each time I felt like my life was turning around, another obstacle stood in the way. 

He ran after me, calling my name. He was getting closer. I tried to run faster, but my legs buckled beneath me and I tumbled to the ground. I felt him pull me into his chest before I began to sob.

He didn’t ask me what was wrong. We sat in the grass wrapped together. He enveloped me in a safety that no one else could offer. The world around us disappeared as he held me. 

Ashton's thumb tilted my chin up.  "Are you ready to tell me what that call was about?"

I shook my head.

He kissed my cheek. "Okay, whenever you're ready.  Whatever it was though, you still need this."

He lifted my hand, slid the bracelet onto my wrist and kissed my knuckles. 

It didn’t make sense to keep
this from him, I blurted out, "I'm pregnant." 

He sighed. "Thank goodness." 

My head whipped up in shock. "What?" 

He clarified, "I'm sorry, the scenarios in my head were so much worse than that. You can't blame the baby for who the father is. It seems too early to be from the rape." 

I nodded. "It ties me to Hudson, though." 

Ashton argued, "Not necessarily. He doesn’t have to know. He doesn’t seem like the fatherly type to me.  Ultimately, it's your decision on what you do. The only thing I will say is that it changes nothing about my feelings for you. I love kids." 

I pinched my arm and cringed at the pain. "Ouch." 

His face scrunched up. "Why did you do that?" 

I shrugged and said, "I figured this must be a dream."

He smiled and kissed my cheek. "Nope, baby. Not a dream." 

I took a deep breath. "Take me to the police station.  I need to put him away." 

He helped me stand and we brushed the grass off our clothes. We strolled through the park, holding hands, on our way back to where we'd parked his bike. 

Chapter Fifteen

When we arrived at the police station they sent me to a room to speak with an officer and give my statement. They recorded the details of what happened to me. I had to be concise.  There were a few things Ash didn’t know about. 

When I got to the really rough parts, he squeezed my hand.  I watched the pain roll over his face. It was difficult for me to describe things such as the way Hudson placed his hand over my mouth so I couldn’t scream. How he yanked a large chunk of my hair out when he grabbed my hair and knocked me to the ground. I allowed the officer to take pictures of it. Ashton hadn't seen it because I was able to cover it by putting my hair up. 

The officer stopped at one point with tears in her eyes. She walked over and hugged me tightly.  "You're very brave for coming in here."

Ashton placed his hand on my shoulder. "She definitely is."

He shook the officer's hand before we left. She stated that she would file the report and they would call me to follow up. 

My phone had three texts. Cameron sent two, asking where I was, and Angel sent one, asking if everything was okay. I texted them both back that things were fine. Ashton drove us back to the house. When we arrived, everyone was waiting in the living room. 

Cameron rushed to me,
but he stopped before touching me. Normally, he would wrap me in a hug and give me a kiss. I didn’t like that our routine was changed. To lighten the moment, I held my arms out and said, "Where's the love, Cam?"

He grinned and lifted me in a hug. I cringed a bit at the touch, but didn’t show it so that he'd be happy. When he sat me down, Ash let out a breath of relief.  Cameron turned to Ash and held his arms out, "I'll be glad to give you some loving too big man." 

Ash chuckled. "I'm good." 

Someone knocked on the door, and I backed myself into the corner shaking like a leaf. Ashton went to answer it. Before he opened it, he pointed at Cameron. "Go to her, please." 

Cameron saw me cowering in the corner, his face drooped. Angel, Cameron, and Mary Jane stood around me in a protective stance. 

Ashton took a deep breath and opened the door, he exhaled at once. "Shit, man. I'm glad to see you."  Gavin stepped inside and hugged him. 

I felt embarrassed at freaking out. I excused myself to go upstairs. Ashton followed,
but I turned and said, "I need to be alone for a bit." 

He nodded, tho
ugh I could tell he was hurt. 

I felt him watch me as I walked up the stairs. When I reached the top, I turned and he seemed embarrassed to have been caught. I blew him a kiss and he relaxed and smiled up at me. There were a lot of things I needed to mull over in my mind. I ached to have Ash with me, though these decisions were ones I needed to make on my own. 

My body didn’t feel like my own anymore. Normal movements felt forced, I never knew how I would react to things like a simple knock on the door. The terror I felt at that moment shocked me to my core. 

Then there was the other thing. My hand slid to my abdomen. Inside me was this small child who had done nothing wrong, yet I was trying to decide whether to allow it live or not. It wasn't fair I had to make this choice. If this was Ash's baby, I'd be shocked, but excited. 

Was it fair to blame the baby for the choices I had made?  Was it fair for me to have to raise this baby who might look exactly like Hudson, making it difficult to have a normal life?

It seemed most of what was unfair about this was the fact that the baby may not have the best life because of my emotional distress.

Could I give up the baby for adoption? There were so many families that wanted babies, so many women who couldn't conceive them on their own. Would I constantly worry if he or she ended up with someone abusive or unkind?  

I changed into shorts and a tank top. The bed was calling to me,
and I slid into the covers and buried my face in the pillow as the tears fell. For two hours, I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore and my head ached from the physical drain.  

Downstairs, I heard laughter and music playing. I wanted to stop hu
rting. I wanted to have fun for a while. The comfort of my friends would make everything disappear for a while. I washed my face, brushed my hair and searched for a t-shirt to cover myself. Ashton's backpack was by the door. I rifled through it and found a t-shirt of his. I slid it on, bringing it to my nose as I took in the scent of him.  I pulled on pajama pants and opened the door to go face my friends.

"Ash?" I
asked as I stepped into the hall. 

He sat with his back against the wall, his knees pulled up to his chest. His arms were crossed over his knees, his head resting on his arms. He glanced up at me. 

"How long have you been out here?" I asked. 

He stretched, stood up and said, "Since you first came up." 

My mouth gaped open briefly, "That was two hours ago." 

He shrugged. "I wanted to be here in case you needed me."