Grizzly Flying Free (Air Bear Shifters Book 2) (8 page)

Lexi sipped her glass of wine as she sat on the couch, listening to the sound of Anderson’s animated voice drifting down the hallway. He was reading Silver her third bedtime story, and he was putting a lot of dramatic effort into the tale. Silver had begged for Lexi to sit with them and read the stories, but she had begged off and said she wanted to rest. Reading bedtime stories together with Silver’s dad felt too intimate. Too much like what a mother would do.

Lexi took a deep breath and took another long sip of wine. Silver had been dropping hints all day long that she wanted Lexi to be her mother. The little girl was smart—she never actually said the word mom or mother. But it was clear that she was already imagining Lexi stepping into a parental role. Lexi loved Silver dearly, but she didn’t want to disappoint the girl or lead her on. It was becoming more and more obvious that Anderson had some deeper feelings for Lexi, but Lexi wasn’t sure when or if he was going to act on those feelings. And, if he did ask Lexi to take things to the next level with him, there was no guarantee that things would work out long-term. The last thing Lexi wanted to do was break Silver’s heart, so she tried to put some boundaries on her relationship with the little girl. Declining to share the bedtime routine with Anderson was one of those boundaries.

Speaking of boundaries, the friendship line between Lexi and Anderson was quickly blurring into nonexistence. Things had been intensifying since the moment he had walked into Auntie Grace’s house this afternoon. When Anderson’s eyes had met Lexi’s over the flour-covered island, she had felt a searing heat leaping from his gaze to her very core. He had looked at her the way a man in love looks at a woman, and she had been unable to look away. Then, in the grocery store this afternoon, his hand had casually brushed hers several times—always when Silver wasn’t watching, always deliberate. Every time his skin touched hers, she felt crackling electricity jumping from his body to hers. And when he had placed his hand on the small of her back as they walked back into his cabin for dinner tonight, she had felt a wave of tingling passion wash over her.

Anderson Rowe was making sure that he left no doubt in Lexi’s mind that he was interested in her. He had invited her to have dinner with Silver and him, and she had gladly accepted. Not only did she not want to eat alone in her guest cabin, but she also didn’t want to leave Anderson’s presence. Something about him today was drawing her in stronger than ever. Perhaps it was the fact that, for the first time, he seemed to be making no attempt to hide his feelings for her. Lexi took another sip of her wine and shivered with anticipation of what the evening would bring. Would he say something to her tonight to let her know he was interested? Could she dare to hope that he might kiss her?

Lexi felt her cheeks heating up and turning pink at the thought of Anderson’s lips on hers. She had to get her emotions under control before he came back out to the living room, and it sounded like she didn’t have much time. She could hear his voice coming from down the hallway, firmly denying Silver’s request for a fourth bedtime story.

A few moments later, Anderson’s tall form appeared in the living room.

“Hey,” he said, smiling sheepishly at her. “Sorry to make you wait so long. Silver would listen to bedtime stories all night if she could.”

“No worries,” Lexi said. “If I had little girl as sweet as Silver, I’d never want to stop reading her stories.”

“She’s a good kid, isn’t she?” Anderson said, grabbing the bottle of wine from the dining room table and topping off both of their glasses.

Lexi nodded her agreement, and then took another sip of newly replenished wine. She felt the butterflies in her stomach growing stronger now that Anderson was back in the room with her. But she noticed with disappointment that he sat across from her in his recliner, instead of on the couch. Maybe she had been misreading how interested he was, after all.

He ran his fingers through his hair and stared up at the ceiling, and Lexi wondered if perhaps she should hurry to finish her wine and then go back to her cabin. Anderson looked tired. Maybe he was only pouring her more wine to be a polite host, when all he really wanted was to go to bed. Lexi took a long, deep swig from her wine glass, and was about to open her mouth to say she should get going, when Anderson spoke first.

“I have something I need to talk to you about, Lexi,” he said. He finally tore his gaze away from the ceiling and looked her in the eye. There was no mistaking the look of desire he was aiming in her direction. She had been right. He was interested. Lexi felt her heart start pounding as she waited for him to confess his interest in her. This was the big moment—they were finally going to stop dancing around their feelings and start exploring them. Lexi set her wine glass down on the coffee table and sat on her hands, trying to contain her excitement.

“I don’t think it’s a big secret that I have some feelings for you,” Anderson began. His eyes searched Lexi’s eyes, looking for some sort of reassurance that he wasn’t completely off base in thinking she wanted to hear about those feelings. Lexi smiled encouragingly and waited for him to continue. The butterflies in her stomach were in a complete frenzy.

“I’ll just cut straight to the chase. I think you’re beautiful. You’re talented. You’re kind. Silver loves you. You make my heart do flip-flops every time I’m around you. I can’t stop thinking about you, and I would love the opportunity to make you my girl and show you just how special I think you are.”

Anderson paused, and ran his fingers through his hair and looked up at the ceiling again. Lexi realized with surprise that he was nervous. She couldn’t imagine what a strong, gorgeous man like Anderson had to be nervous about, but she decided it would be nice of her to give him a bit of encouragement.

“I think you’re really special, too, Anderson,” she offered. But her words didn’t seem to ease his nerves. In fact, he seemed more agitated as he turned his gaze back to her.

“I’m glad to hear that,” he said softly. “But there’s something I need to talk to you about before you make a decision on whether to date me.”

Lexi laughed. “What could possibly be so serious?” she asked. “Let me guess. You’re worried about the long-distance aspect? We can make that work. I understand you probably don’t want to up and move to Kodiak. We can figure out a way to work around that.”

A pained look crossed Anderson’s face, and Lexi felt her heart dropping. The distance factor wasn’t the problem. It was something else. Something very serious, it seemed, if the intense expression on Anderson’s face was any clue.

“I am worried about the distance, but that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about. There’s something else and…look there’s no easy way to explain this, so I’m just going to blurt it out and hope that it’s not a total dealbreaker.”

“Okay,” Lexi said, her voice flat. He sounded so serious. She resisted the urge to let her mind jump to all sorts of awful conclusions, and waited for him to continue. Even though she was already feeling a little buzzed, she took another long sip of her wine. Her nerves were feeling a bit frazzled, and she desperately wanted to calm them.

“I may look like a normal guy, but that’s not exactly the case,” Anderson said. “I’m actually a little different. Have you ever heard of bear shifters?”

Lexi almost choked on her wine. Whatever she had been expecting to hear from Anderson, this definitely wasn’t it. “Uh, yeah,” she said. “Like people who can magically turn into bears?”

Anderson nodded. “Yes, like that. Well, except that it’s more genetics than magic, but that’s not important right now. What’s important is that I want to date you, but, before I ask you to start falling for me, I need to make sure that you know who I am. I’m a bear shifter, Lexi. A grizzly shifter, to be precise. I have a grizzly within me, and can switch back and forth between human and bear form at will.”

Lexi froze with her hand in midair. She had been about to take another sip of wine, but now she just stared at Anderson in disbelief.

She blinked slowly, then blinked again. Was he serious? Was she drunk? Was
he
drunk? Was the big, burly man she had a crush on actually sitting here and telling her with a straight face that he was part bear?

“I’m sorry. What?” she finally managed to say. She must have misunderstood something.

“I’m a grizzly shifter,” Anderson repeated, looking her straight in the eye. Now that he had gotten out what he wanted to say, he seemed to feel bolder and more at ease again. He sat, waiting for her response and looking more handsome in that moment than she had ever seen him look. He looked powerful, noble, and strong. His dark eyes looked proud and unapologetic. And, yeah, he did look kind of like a bear of a man.

But, seriously? People didn’t just turn into bears. Was Anderson crazy?

“I…I’m afraid I don’t understand,” Lexi said, trying to make sense of what was happening. “How does a person just turn into a bear? That’s impossible.”

“I know it sounds far-fetched, but it’s true. Frost Peak is actually full of grizzly shifters. We all have the same genetic mutation that allows us to shift. We’re a pretty tight-knit group, but very friendly and not dangerous, I promise. Silver is a shifter, too. She’s gotten very good at controlling her bear,” Anderson said, a note of pride evident in his voice. “She’s the most talented shifter of any six-year-old I know.”

Lexi set her glass down again. “I don’t believe this,” she said. “You…you look so normal, but you realize you sound certifiably crazy right now, don’t you? Bear shifters don’t really exist. That’s just a myth. Are you trying to get a good laugh at my expense or something? Because I’m not that gullible.”

“It’s not a joke, Lexi,” Anderson insisted.

Lexi wasn’t sure whether to be angry or worried. If this was a joke, she didn’t really find it that funny. And if Anderson really thought he was a bear, well, that was an even bigger problem. She had dated enough delusional people in her life. She wasn’t interested in dating any more. Maybe it was time for her to go home, after all. This evening was not turning out at all the way she had envisioned it.

“It’s late,” Lexi said, standing and quickly making her way toward the coat rack. “Thank you for dinner, but I really should head back to my cabin.”

“Lexi, please. Don’t just leave. I promise I’m not making this up. I know it’s a lot to process, but I promise that deep down I’m really not that different from a full human.”

Lexi finished buttoning up her jacket and started pulling on her boots. “If you really are a bear shifter—which I doubt, because that’s impossible—then by definition you are pretty different from a full human, don’t you think?”

Anderson sighed. A deep, frustrated sigh that seemed to come from his very core. “It’s not impossible, and I can prove it to you.”

Lexi paused with her hand on the front doorknob. How far was Anderson really willing to take this joke? She looked at him, a challenge in her eyes, and he took the opportunity to confirm that he wasn’t making up his claims about bear shifters.

He held his right hand up high, letting Lexi clearly see the human flesh and five human fingers. And then, he set his face in a deep grimace, and let out a low growl that sounded anything but human. Lexi watched in astonishment as the peach-toned, human skin slowly thickened and turned darker, then began to sprout thick, dark brown fur. Anderson’s hand became a paw, and then grew, larger and larger until it was bigger than his head. At the end of the fearsome paw was a set of sharp, impossibly long claws.

“Holy shit,” Lexi said, unsure what other words might be appropriate in this situation. “How did you do that?”

“It’s just a natural ability, passed down through genetics,” Anderson said, repeating himself patiently as he continued to hold his paw up for Lexi to see. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from it, and she couldn’t figure out what else to say.

“I’m in complete control of my bear,” Anderson said, speaking slowly and calmly. “So don’t worry that I’m going to hurt you or something. I know it’s a lot to take in, but I wanted you to know who I really am, given the direction our friendship seems to be going.”

Lexi kept staring, unable to speak. She could hardly believe what she had just seen, but the evidence was still there, right in front of her. Anderson hadn’t been making this up. He really was a bear shifter. Bear shifters really did exist. But how was she supposed to react to this? Say, oh cool, you’re a bear, now where were we on the romance discussion? Did he really expect her to just agree to date him after such a big revelation? It was a lot to process. Too much to process. She needed space. She needed time. She suddenly felt like she was suffocating in the entryway of Anderson’s cabin.

“Lexi?” he asked, concern in his voice.

She shook her head, barely able to speak. “I have to go,” she managed to squeak out.

And then she was gone, running out of his cabin and into the dark night, unsure of anything except the need to get away and be alone with her thoughts.

The next morning, Anderson woke up to the smell of bacon and to the feeling of a pounding headache. The bright light streaming in through his front window felt painful. Each ray felt like it was sending shockwaves of pain directly into his sensitive eyes.

From the kitchen, Anderson heard the sound of Silver’s girlish voice, belting out the latest pop hits at the top of her lungs. Anderson groaned and sat up slowly as the events of the night before started coming back to him.

He had taken a chance, and told Lexi he cared about her. Then he had done the respectable thing and explained that he was a bear shifter, just so she had all the facts. In his mind, he had envisioned Lexi being somewhat surprised, but then nodding cheerfully and saying she understood and appreciated his honesty. Instead, she had first refused to believe him, and then ran off into the night when he proved he was telling the truth.

Anderson felt like such a fool. Why had he listened to his heart? That’s what you do when you’re young and stupid. He was a grown man with daughter to protect and a clan to help take care of. He should know better than to trust his heart by now. He should have trusted his head, the logical side of him that said a human woman could never understand a man who was a bear shifter. Sawyer had just gotten lucky with Amanda. Most humans couldn’t handle a grizzly.

Silver switched to a new pop song, and Anderson slowly dragged himself out of bed. It was no wonder his head was pounding, since last night he had not only finished the bottle of wine he had opened for Lexi and him, but he had also opened a second bottle of wine and polished that one off on his own. He thought there had been a few glasses of whiskey in there somewhere, too, but the details were a little fuzzy right now. It had been a long time since he’d been hung-over, and he definitely could have done without the awful sensation of a hammer banging away at his skull from the inside.

He would have loved to lie in bed all day, but he had some clan business to take care of this morning. And he had promised Silver that he would take her to Auntie Grace’s to bake more cookies. Anderson smiled despite his headache. He couldn’t believe how much his daughter loved baking. Silver’s mother had hated being in the kitchen, but the only thing Silver loved as much as dancing was baking up a storm.

Anderson made his way out to the kitchen, where he found his daughter had almost finished making breakfast. She had whipped up a big scramble of eggs and had, of course, prepared a generous amount of bacon. Two glasses of orange juice waited on the table, and there was a coffee mug at Anderson’s spot, although it didn’t look like Silver had actually made coffee yet.

“Hey, Daddy,” Silver said as Anderson walked into the room. “I made us some breakfast, but I didn’t make you coffee yet. I couldn’t remember how many scoops to use and I didn’t want to mess it up.”

Anderson leaned in and kissed his daughter. “That’s okay, sweetie. I’ll make it myself. This all looks fantastic.”

Silver beamed with pleasure at Anderson’s praise, and started scooping the eggs onto plates as Anderson shuffled his way over to the coffeepot. He was definitely going to need some very strong coffee to make it through the day today. As soon as he finished getting a pot started, he glanced over to see Silver carrying plates full of food to the table. He watched her in admiration for a moment. How did his young daughter even know how to make breakfast? He had never taught her, and he didn’t think Auntie Grace had, either. Had she just figured it out on her own? Had Lexi taught her?

Anderson felt his stomach clench up at the thought of Lexi teaching Silver things. He had a feeling that after his big revelation to Lexi last night, that Silver wouldn’t be taking any more ballet lessons from Lexi. Anderson didn’t have the heart to break the news to his daughter right now, though. He knew Silver was excited about the day ahead with her aunt, and he didn’t want to ruin her good mood.

Silver chatted away happily as they ate breakfast, and didn’t seem to notice how quiet her father was being. As soon as his coffee was done brewing, Anderson stood up to get some, and downed two aspirin along with several swigs of the strong, black liquid. Thankfully, he only had a few things to take care of this morning, and then he was free for the rest of the day. He had been hoping to spend the day with Lexi, but, since that didn’t seem like it was going to be happening, he might take the chance to go for a run in the woods. Maybe he would even shift for a while and let his bear run free. Letting his grizzly out in the snowy forest always seemed to calm his nerves.

Anderson frowned. He probably did need to check in with Lexi. He had a feeling that she didn’t really want to talk to him right now, but she was going to want to go back to Kodiak at some point, probably sooner rather than later. Maybe Anderson could convince Sawyer to fly her back, since he was willing to bet that Lexi didn’t have much interest in being stuck in a small plane with him right now.

“Dad! Dad, are you listening to me?” Silver asked, her impatient voice bringing him back to the present moment.

“What? Huh? Sort of, yeah. What’s up?”

“Auntie Grace said I can spend the night with her tonight. Can I? Pretty please?”

Anderson narrowed his eyes in his daughter’s direction. “Did she only say you could after you badgered her for hours?” Silver always wanted to spend the night at her aunt’s and had been known to beg and plead until she convinced the old woman to give in.

“I only asked one time before she said yes, I promise,” Silver said. “Please? It’s going to be so fun!”

Anderson sighed. “Okay, fine. Go pack yourself an overnight bag and I’ll take care of putting these dishes away. Thanks for breakfast, although now I’m wondering if you only made it to butter me up so I’d let you spend the night at Auntie’s.”

Silver shrugged and smiled, not even bothering to try to hide her ulterior motives. Anderson laughed to himself as she scurried off to her room. He loved her spunk, even though dealing with her could require a lot of energy sometimes.

Forty-five minutes later, Anderson pulled his truck up next to the airplane hangar that served as the office for Frost Peak Tours. He had already dropped Silver off at Auntie Grace’s, and she had barely even asked about Lexi in her excitement about spending the night at her aunt’s. Now, the parking lot at the hangar was empty, so he could take care of his errand without having to talk to anyone. He definitely did not feel like telling Sawyer about his failed attempt to woo Lexi. Anderson stomped quickly through the snow outside the hangar and made his way inside to file away some maintenance paperwork he had been working on for one of the planes.

He worked quickly, and was soon making his way for the door to leave again. On the way out, he paused and looked at the small fleet of planes that was parked inside the warm hangar. During the summer, these machines flew nonstop. But during the cold winter months, they only went out for the occasional short flight, and only when the weather was actually decent. Like today.

Anderson realized that this might be one of the few days over the next few weeks that he would be able to make the flight to Kodiak and back. He owed it to Lexi to go let her know that if she wanted to head back home before Christmas, now was the time. If they waited until tomorrow, she might be stuck in Frost Peak for another week, at least. Anderson had a feeling that after their conversation last night, she wasn’t going to want to stay here any longer. Her plans of celebrating Christmas in Frost Peak probably didn’t seem so exciting anymore. He would take her back to Kodiak, and, if she didn’t want to fly with him, he was sure he could convince Sawyer to make the short flight.

With a heavy heart, Anderson climbed back into his truck and started driving toward the guest cabin where Lexi was staying. He didn’t know how Lexi would react to seeing him, but he was pretty sure it wasn’t going to be good. This is why he had gone so long without trying to find love. As soon as you opened your heart up to someone, you risked getting hurt. And Anderson had dealt with enough pain in his life. Why did he need a woman, anyway? He should be thankful that he had good friends and a beautiful daughter, and not try to force the universe to give him more.

Even as Anderson said these things to himself, he knew he didn’t regret telling Lexi how he felt. If he hadn’t told her, he would have always wondered what could have been. At least now he knew the answer to that question: nothing. Nothing could or ever would happen between Lexi and him. They were too different.

Anderson parked in front of Lexi’s cabin less than a minute later. The place was very close to the airport, in a small row of guest cabins that had been built to make sure visitors always had a place to stay when they came to Frost Peak. There were no hotels here, since this wasn’t exactly a tourist destination. The only people who came here were either shifters visiting friends, or tourists who were stopping over for a few hours during the summer while they waited to take one of the air tours. Most of the time, these cabins stood empty.

Anderson walked up to the door of Lexi’s cabin and knocked, but he already had a feeling she wasn’t here. It was quiet—too quiet. And her scent wasn’t strong enough. There was only a lingering trace of it, telling him that she had been there earlier that morning but wasn’t there now. Anderson turned around and walked slowly back to his truck, unsure of what to do. Where had she gone? Maybe into town to shop? She hadn’t bought much in the way of groceries for herself last night, since Anderson had invited her to dinner. Maybe she had gone back to the store now to get a few things.

The thought briefly crossed Anderson’s mind that she might be upset after learning about shifters, and that she might have gone somewhere to try to alert the authorities to the fact that there was a clan of shifters nestled up here in the Alaskan wilderness. But Anderson pushed that thought away. Lexi didn’t seem like the type to go ratting on someone to the government. And besides, how would she get anywhere? She had no vehicle, and, even if she did, the roads in and out of Frost Peak were virtually impassible at this time of year. She must have just gone shopping, or for a walk to clear her head.

Anderson climbed into his truck and tried to decide what to do next. He had a whole empty day stretching in front of him, which hadn’t happened in quite some time. He was tempted to wallow in self-pity over the fact that he had a free day and no one to spend it with, but he pushed away that temptation quickly. No point in sitting around moping. He would go for a run in the woods, like he had planned to do earlier. The coffee and aspirin seemed to be doing its job, as his headache was subsiding. There was no sense in wasting this beautiful day.

Anderson drove his truck to the edge of Frost Peak, and parked it right by the trailhead of one of his favorite trails. In the summer, he often took Silver down this path, which followed the winding course of a stream through the forest. Now, in the dead of winter, the stream would be frozen solid, and the path would be covered in snow. But it didn’t matter. Anderson knew the way well. He was looking forward to spending some time in the solitude of the snowy forest.

He climbed out of his truck after looking around to make sure no one else was nearby. He didn’t want to have to make small talk with anyone right now. He just wanted some peace and quiet, and time to himself to think. He slipped into the forest and peeled off his clothing quickly, leaving it in neatly folded little piles behind a large pine tree that he knew well. He tucked his truck keys under the clothing pile, shivering as the frigid December air hit his vulnerable human skin. This uncomfortable freezing feeling wouldn’t last long, though. As soon as Anderson let his bear out to play, his thick grizzly fur would get rid of any remaining chill.

After glancing around once more to make sure he was alone, Anderson threw his head back and let out a huge roar. A shock of powerful energy swept through the nearby trees, causing a few weak branches to crack and fall to the ground. Anderson’s skin thickened, then sprouted dark brown fur. His face morphed into the giant head of an Alaskan grizzly, his round ears and dark brown nose easily taking in all the sights and smells of the forest. His arms and legs became the strong, long legs of a bear, and his hands and feet turned into paws that ended in fearsome claws.

As his transformation completed, Anderson let out another long, loud roar, and then swung his grizzly head wildly from side to side to loosen up the kinks that came from being in human form. He drew in a deep breath, taking in the crisp, fresh air of the pine forest, and then he took off running. He moved at full speed, letting his powerful bear legs carry him effortlessly through the woods. He followed the path perfectly, even though it was invisible. He knew exactly where every twist and turn was before he reached it, thanks to decades of running along this same path.

When Silver was younger, and he was first teaching her how to control her bear, he would often bring her on this same path, letting her run free and then encouraging her to practice shifting back and forth. He had spent an enormous amount of time making sure that she was an expert at knowing how to shift quickly, and how to keep an angry inner bear under control. His efforts had paid off, since Silver was more in control of her bear than kids twice her age. Anderson had a feeling that Silver would have no problem living in a city made up of full humans. Staying in Kodiak had been a good test for her. She had spent several months there, and had never given off even a hint that there was anything different about her.

Anderson grunted as he ran, his bear gaining speed as he hit a straight stretch of the path. Of course, it would break his heart if Silver moved away. But he wanted her to have options. She was a talented girl, and who knew where her intelligence or dancing abilities might take her? Anderson wouldn’t be doing his duty as a father if he didn’t give her the tools to live secretly as a shifter in a human world. He’d worked hard to make sure his little girl could go anywhere and do anything she wanted.