Gut Feeling (9 page)

She slid her hands up over his shoulders then kissed him. They stood embraced in one another’s arms, caressing each other, and she felt herself yearning for him to touch her. She started to unbutton his shirt, feeling his chest. In a moment he had pushed her back onto the sofa, pulling up her light summer dress, slowly slipping his fingers inside her. She reached for his belt, tugging at it to unbuckle. Moving her underneath him with one hand firmly on her buttock, he pushed himself deep into her.

That night once they returned to Ash’s, she lay in bed next to Dave, looking up at the ceiling and thinking how lucky she was to have found someone as lovely as him. Memories of her and Lee got pushed to one side and she curled herself into the nook of his masculine arm, catching a waft of his aftershave as she moved; he pulled her tight and she smiled gently to herself as they eased into a deep, satisfying sleep together.

Chapter 5

A
sh was running up Harley Street so as not to be too late for work. She got to the practice just in time for a morning cup of coffee downstairs in the staffroom, and a quick read of the Metro before she rushed off up to the surgery to set up for the day. As Ash approached the stairwell she heard a sound behind her. She turned to see Samantha hurry past without greeting her.

That’s
strange
, she thought.

‘Morning, Ash.’ Eliza strolled along the corridor.

‘Morning—how were things while I was away?’

‘Er… Yeah, OK…’ Eliza sounded odd. She quickly asked about the funeral instead.

All day things seemed a little off kilter. Samantha didn’t talk to her much and Eliza seemed edgy, not her normal self. Maybe they were just busy or perhaps she had stayed away too long and was out of the loop, now out of their little clique. Later that day Ash was dressing in the staffroom, getting ready to go home when she thought she heard raised voices from upstairs. By the time she got up there, the only people around were Samantha and Eliza standing in the reception. As she walked past they both seemed tense.

‘See you in the morning,’ Ash said as she walked down the entrance hall to leave.

‘Bye,’ shouted Eliza.

But again Samantha didn’t say anything.

What’s
going
on?
Ash wondered.
Have
I
done
something
to
upset
Sam?
. But she didn’t spend too long mulling it over as she knew how temperamental Samantha could be.

She took her normal route home through Hyde Park, stopping to sunbathe for an hour on the grass. Thoughts of the wired atmosphere at work bothered Ash as she hoped Eliza was not upset with her in any way. Why the raised voices? What had gone on while she was away? Had Eliza fallen out with Samantha? She took out her phone, dialling Eliza’s number; it rang for some time before a shaky sounding voice answered.

‘Eliza, it’s Ash. Are you OK?’

Ash’s heart sank as she knew Eliza was lying when she told her that everything was fine. They spoke for some time, then Ash told her about Lee playing games and how he had called at her home and bombarded her with flowers and gifts, not to mention the phone calls, all of which were unwanted.

‘El, I miss him. He sounded so sorry. I know I can’t go back,’ Ash admitted reluctantly.

‘He’s not sorry—he’s a pig!’ Eliza snapped angrily.

Eliza’s reaction took Ash by surprise as she had personally never met Lee, and only knew of him through what Ash had told her. Ash was stumped by her reaction, but decided to put it down to a good friend caring. Ash agreed to stay away from Lee, then thought best to end the conversation.

* * *

The next morning Ash sat outside a coffee shop on Oxford Street, enjoying a cup of coffee and a copy of the
Metro
she had found left on the table. She hadn’t seen Samantha across the road talking to her ex Lee, nor had they seen Ash sitting reading the newspaper.

A bus sounded its horn as a car tried to overtake. Ash looked up to see what had happened, but Lee and Samantha were too busy in conversation to have even looked away. The commotion ended with the irate drivers screaming at each other through opened windows; the bus drove on, clearing Ash’s view. It was then that she caught sight of the two of them standing practically opposite her. Gasping, she quickly stood up, walking as fast as she could down the walkway beside the coffee shop where she could watch them without being seen.

She tried to guess what they were talking about, wondering if they had just bumped into one another or if they had meant to meet; Lee worked in the city but did see clients in the West End at times. Maybe he was coming to see her, and Samantha had found a new form of loyalty towards Ash and was trying to talk him out of it, to make up for giving him her address.

Ash’s head spun. After a few minutes the conversation looked like it was coming to an end. Ash was about to turn away and walk to work when she saw Lee put his hand out and grasp Samantha’s buttock as he walked off. Shocked, Ash stayed watching. Samantha laughed then turned back to kiss him. Ash stood numb as she saw them embrace. Her mouth fell open slightly—she couldn’t move, her eyes fixed to the spot where they just stood. She jolted, realising Samantha was probably going to be walking through the same walkway to get to work.

She quickly ran down the alley and instead of turning left and going to work she turned right, past the back of John Lewis and carried on straight along the road and into the entrance of Cavendish Square for refuge. Panting, she sat on a bench to catch her breath. Thoughts scrambled in her head; she breathed heavily as she braced herself for more heartache. Her eyes were watering, probably from all the running, but also from an emotion she couldn’t quite identify, though in her heart she knew it had something to do with a love that had turned sour and bad, but with a deep sense of betrayal.

She watched the London workers walking to work across the square like ants, doing the same walk every day. Heart-pounding anger rumbled through her body like a tube speeding through a tunnel. The longer she thought, the angrier she became, and suddenly the penny dropped. She pulled out her phone to ring Eliza, her heart hitting her chest with a dull thud as she waited for the phone to answer.

‘Hello,’ Eliza said.

Ash took a deep breath to calm herself down. ‘Something you want to tell me, Eliza?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I saw, El—’

‘Saw what?’

‘I saw Lee and Sam… together, Eliza. Why didn’t you tell me?’ She tried to stay calm but inside she had an irresistible urge to scream into the phone.

‘I’m so sorry, Ash.’

Eliza sat down at her desk to tell her everything that had happened while she had been away.

‘He came looking for you the other day… said you weren’t picking up his calls.’

‘I was on my way to a bloody
funeral
, for God’s sake!’ Ash raised her voice in fury.

‘I know, honey, that’s what I told him. I’m sorry,’ Eliza carried on. ‘He took Sam for lunch… And then I saw them after work the next day having a drink in some bar off the high street. I walked past them on my way home.’

Ash was silent for a moment and Eliza said nothing. In the background Ash could hear at the other end of the phone someone coming in the front door.

‘Is that Sam?’

‘Yes.’

‘Don’t say I know.’

‘I won’t, darling; you are coming into work then?’

‘Of course, you need a nurse and I need a chat with Sam.’

‘Ash, I did have it out with her. I told her to—’

‘Eliza, you have done nothing wrong,’ Ash interrupted. ‘It’s not for you to explain. That’s Sam’s job… God, she’s such a bitch.’

‘There are no patients until 10.30 so that will give you time to talk to her. I’ll see you when you get here.’

It was 9.15 by the time Ash arrived. She walked past reception, said hello to everyone as normal and went downstairs to the staffroom where she found Samantha changing. Eliza was making coffee. Ash smiled at her watching her pick up a freshly made cup and leave the room.

Samantha did not turn to look at Ash, just said a quick hello while she buttoned up her tunic.

‘Morning, Sam,’ Ash sat at the large oval table. ‘Sit with me for a while Sam. I’m interested to hear about you and my ex.’

Samantha swung around. ‘What?’

‘I saw you this morning—kissing! So don’t feed me any bullshit. Just tell me the truth.’

‘I’m sorry, Ash I didn’t know how to tell you.’ Samantha sat down, looking sheepish.

In the back of Ash’s mind she knew Samantha didn’t feel bad; she knew her well enough to see through her puppy-dog eyes. Ash wanted to scratch her eyes out as she stared at her face across the table, but as she listened to Samantha drone on she thought about Dave.

She had Dave. She didn’t want Lee back. Why make an argument out of it? Plus Lee more than likely wanted her to react in anger. She paused for a moment, composing herself before speaking.

‘I
was
angry. Very angry… but sod it. If that’s what you want, then have him. I’ve got a new boyfriend and quite frankly, honey, you are welcome to Lee.’

Samantha smiled, trying not to smirk at her triumph.

‘Just a few things I don’t understand though, Sam.’ She paused for a moment. ‘Why did you tell him where I had moved to, knowing I did
not
want him to know?’

Samantha looked up at Ash and sighed. ‘I bumped into him one night… I’d had too much to drink. I don’t even remember telling him.’ She looked away, starting to flick through the pages of the newspaper on the table.

‘OK. Well, in that case I suppose you didn’t remember giving him my new number either.’

‘I don’t know, Ash.’

‘Not one of your best moves hey? The other thing I don’t understand…’

She paused again. ‘Why do you want to be with a man that phoned me last night telling me that he wants me back?’

Samantha raised her head up from the article she was reading. ‘I know what he’s like, Ash. I can’t change that but I have feelings for him now.’

Ash laughed.
Good
luck
to
her.
It’s
not
my
problem
any
more
, she thought.

‘OK Sam, whatever. You’re both so similar you may even work out.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

Ash stood up to get her uniform out of her locker. ‘The words thoughtless and selfish come to mind.’

Samantha didn’t really care or want to create an argument at work so she just walked out of the room. ‘Sorry, Ash.’

* * *

On the bus home Ash sat down next to a girl who was on her mobile phone; the girl was consoling a friend, who by the sound of it had found out that her boyfriend had been caught in the act with the nanny. Opposite were two new lovers who couldn’t keep their hands off each other, whispering into each other’s ears. The bus stopped at the end of Ash’s road and she got off.

Ash rushed around trying to get herself ready so as not to be late over to Dave’s, she grabbed her keys then hurried back down the steps to the garage. Reversing out, she saw Mr Schnitzer coming home from work so she stopped for a quick chat, mindful of the time. She kept the conversation to small talk and went on her way. It didn’t take long to get to Wandsworth. Dave saw her arrive outside and met her at the top step.

‘Hello, honey, how are you?’ He bent to kiss her.

‘Hi, babe, I’m good.’

He smiled and patted her on the bum. Ash walked through the door to the communal hallway guiding herself up the darkened stairway by the handrail. She could smell the light scent of cooking and realised how hungry she was.

‘Mmm, Indian?’ she said as she walked into the flat.

‘Yes,’ said a voice behind her.

She turned to see Peter, who ushered her into the living room.

‘So? What dish are we having then?’ Ash enquired politely.

‘Chicken curry, Issi has gotta prove she can cook a curry if she wants to stay. It’s in the tenant’s contract you see,’ Peter said with smirk.

A few moments later Dave brought Issi in to meet Ash.

‘I thought I would give her five minutes out the kitchen to meet you, babe.’ Dave winked at Ash then introduced them both.

‘Hiya,’ Issi smiled nervously.

‘Hello, so you’re on a cooking break then?’

Issi’s smile lightened. ‘Yes. Why don’t I get some beers out of the fridge—it’s nearly ready.’ She walked back to the kitchen.

‘See, that’s why she got the room,’ Peter said, looking at Dave.

Issi came back in with four open bottles of Corona. ‘OK, cheers everyone, and can you all sit down as it’s just about ready.’

‘Wanna hand, Iss?’ said Peter, following her into the kitchen.

Dave watched them walk away and laughed to himself. He turned to look at Ash who had a thoughtful look on her face.

‘What’s up, babes? Don’t you like her?’

‘No, no, it’s not that,’ Ash giggled.

Dave smiled, stepping towards her. ‘What then?’

She giggled again. ‘OK, don’t say anything, Dave, as I may be wrong, but I was in a newsagents today and…’ Ash lowered her voice ‘ . . . and Issi looks very much like a girl on the cover of a porn mag!’

‘No… Let’s ask her.’

‘No don’t!’

‘Why?’

‘It may offend her.’

‘OK, hun, I’ll do some probing, find out ha?’ Dave smiled, pulling her close to him under his arm.

Dinner went well, Ash thought. Issi seemed OK enough, and she could see the chemistry between Peter and her, but having said that, she could see that Issi was flirting with both brothers. However, as Dave didn’t seem to be reciprocating the gestures, all was well. Both Ash and Dave tried to probe discreetly about the glamour modelling. Although they didn’t get very far, it amused the two of them as they gave sideways glances to each other every time their questions hit a brick wall. And by the end of the night Ash was pretty much convinced that Issi was neither a porn star nor a glamour model.