Hard: A Military Stepbrother Romance (5 page)

I
shook my head at the fancy notion and moved up to the other place waiting at
the table, seeing them all looking expectantly at me.

“Nice
room.”

It
was clear my mother couldn’t tell whether my flash of a smile was mocking or
not, but regardless of what they thought, Terence decided the best option was
to take me at face value.

“Thank
you. I hope you’re hungry - the food is more than ready.”

The
subtle reminder of my tardiness only made me smile, but my amusement at Bella’s
inability to escape twisted as I realized it offered me a similar problem. With
her on my left, it was hard not to let my eyes linger on the exposed skin of
her neck joining shoulder…I could taste the light scent she used in the air,
even with the tempting smells of marinated meat that was quickly set down in
front of us. If I hadn’t been distracted I would have probably formed an
opinion about having people to cook and bring us food.

I
kept my hands studiously above the table, knowing unless they were in plain
sight it would be far too tempting to run them down the skirt she was wearing,
tease that place the hem met skin the way I had so many times before, and let
just a finger slip underneath. That was all it took to drive her crazy - I
could remember that plain as day - and the dime-a-dozen women I’d known since
had only appreciated the attention to detail that Navy SEAL training had added.

“What?”

Bella’s
voice drew me out of the completely illicit fantasy and made me realize I
wasn’t the only one wrapped up in thoughts that left me with no clue as to
where the conversation was.

“I
was just asking whether you were alright with the lamb - you mentioned
something about going through a vegan phase at school?”

The
question seemed badly timed, considering the food was already cooked and
served, but Bella was eating it without complaint - and from the closed off
expression on her face, without tasting it either.

“Oh,
yes, it’s fine thank you. And it wasn’t a phase - it was a challenge. Just
wanted to see whether I could do it for 60 days.”

“If
you say so.”

The
condescension there irked me, but apart from a momentary frown, Bella ignored
it. To my surprise, it was my mother’s voice that spoke up.

“I can
understand that - challenging yourself to do new, different things. I’m sure
Seth does too - isn’t that one of your SEAL mottos, hmm?”

Not
the way you say it.

Ever
since I’d gained that badge of honor, my mother had become obsessed with it -
quick to parade my service out in front of anyone who would listen, and I
couldn’t stand it. She had no clue what it really meant to be who I was, to
serve as I did. A few maxims and quotes weren’t enough to understand.
Constantly challenging, training, learning, pushing…that was as much a part of
my life as breathing. So yes, I could understand Bella’s motivations - she was
the kind of girl who could fit into that same life view, after all. But I
sincerely doubted my mother did.

Instead
of launching into that tirade, I just shrugged and grunted, brushing it away as
I always did with those comments.

I
focused on pushing away the distraction of her presence right there at my
shoulder and tried to turn my attention back to the man my mother was planning
to make my step-father. My initial optimism had died as soon as I’d realized
just whose father he was, and with it most of my interest, but I could at least
try to be polite. Whatever got me away from the awkwardness of this meal
quicker. And away from the tempting siren next to me.

Unfortunately,
he brought the conversation right back to the same place again.

“Ah
yes, your mother mentioned you were in the Navy SEALs. Quite an accomplishment
- is it as hard as they say, the training?”

I
felt Bella startle at that, shooting me a sidelong glance.

The
images flashed through my mind briefly - the freezing cold, the harsh surf as
we lay in it for hours, the never-ending ache of fatigued muscles, constant
stress and pressure and haranguing to quit…it was the worst thing I’d ever
done. And the best. And I never wanted to do it again.

“Harder.”

He
asked me a few more questions but I didn’t elaborate much beyond one word
answers. I tried to care about being pleasant but found myself failing
spectacularly. I hated this line of conversation - almost like I was some
novelty on display. I’d never found anyone outside the force that I could stand
talking to about this stuff. And those within didn’t talk about it - they
didn’t need to.

The
conversation died away after a few more moments, and I was glad to just focus
on my food. My mother kicked it off again just as the silence started to feel
heavy, evidently giving up on me.

 “What
about you, Annabelle? Your father mentioned you’d graduated with a 3.9 - that’s
seriously impressive! What are your plans now?”

Bella
shifted beside me, and I could read her discomfort instantly. My eyes watched
her closely at that, curiosity overcoming even the desire to run my hand up
through her hair and unpick the clips that held it restrained. There was something
wrong about my need to feel it tumbling around me, my hand caught in it as I
pulled her head back for a kiss that would take her breath away…

OK,
maybe curiosity didn’t quite overcome that.

Bella
cleared her throat and glanced at her father, before taking a breath in a
manner that spoke of a practiced action.

“I’ve
been thinking about that, actually.”

Terence
gave her a quick look, his face unchanged as he answered for her.

“You
were thinking of attending a med school near here, weren’t you? So studying for
the MCAT soon, I imagine.”

She
looked back at him evenly, but her body language made me feel she was preparing
herself for what she was about to say.

The
dynamics between the two of them were fascinating - Bella’s controlled, almost
emotionless manner had been a big part of her reputation at school. Personally,
I’d never quite seen her that way - but then I’d made it my purpose to goad her
out of it. Looking at them both right now though, I had a feeling that
this
was
who it was for.

“Yes,
that’s one of the options. But, you know, we’d discussed taking some time to
think it through after graduation, and I’ve also been getting really interested
in forensics. I was thinking it might be worth pursu—”

She
was cut off by a slight laugh, and my eyebrows shot up as I looked back to her
father, who was shaking his head with a small, tolerant smile.

“I
think you’ve been watching too much CSI, my dear.”

Bella
tensed for a moment beside me, before forcing herself to relax and shrugging.

“It’s
just something to consider - maybe we should talk about it another time.”

“I
don’t think there’s much to talk about, Annabelle. It’s not a good idea.”

His
response made my blood boil and I was ready to snap at him, but glanced to the
side and waited for Bella to do so - she wouldn’t appreciate me fighting her
battles. And it wasn’t like it was my place to anyway. But to my surprise she
just slunk further into her chair and pushed her food around the plate.

This
was the girl who had never once failed to find a come-back for one of my jibes?

It
took all my effort not to stare at her. For some reason, her attitude just made
me even angrier - with her or him, I couldn’t tell. Maybe both of them. Maybe
just the world for this whole fucked up situation.

What
did I care whether she did medicine or forensics, anyway?

Except
that I couldn’t stand to see her treated that way.

Says
the guy who was taunting her a few minutes ago…

My
reaction made less sense than her behavior and it was all irritating the hell
out of me.

The
air was tense for a minute, until my mother picked up the slack again and
rattled on about some conversation she’d had out shopping today. If I wasn’t so
irate, I would have been impressed with her sudden social graces.

Bella
asked to be excused a few minutes later, when a couple of people came to
collect our plates, saying she had a headache and wasn’t feeling like dessert.
Her father just nodded and she turned to my mother.

“It
was good to meet you, Cora…Seth.”

She
didn’t look at me as she turned and left, and it took more willpower than I
would have expected not to watch her go.

Great.
And now I’m all alone with them both…

Not
that that mattered when my only thought was of her - the way she’d looked,
dejected and defeated in the face of her father’s comments. A direct contrast
to the spark of anger and outrage I’d provoked earlier tonight, the familiar
game that was now tinged with an uncomfortable edge. The way I could still
remember her body, skin against skin as we drove each other to heights I’ve
never seen before or since.

God
damn!

I
could almost feel her against me again, hearing her cry my name as I was taken
with the way this somewhat shy, innocent girl could become such an intense
wildcat when provoked. That was what had enthralled me, I’d known from the first
instant. And seeing the opposite tonight had provoked me almost beyond
tolerance.

I
wanted to go after her, to change whatever had just happened between her and
her father - even knowing most likely I could only make it worse. The sporadic
conversation between Terence and my mother almost drove me up the wall as I sat
there debating whether to storm up after her or stay away. I knew what the
sensible thing to do was. I knew what was right.

And
I wanted to damn it all to hell.

It
was a terrible idea. But there was so much between us…so much left unsaid. And
now that our parents had hooked up, it wasn’t like we could avoid each other
forever.

But
we couldn’t have anything else either. Even if I hadn’t gone out of my way to
push her away tonight, my mother had ensured she was firmly out of reach. I
just wasn’t conditioned to accept that.

There
is no “can’t”. Will or will not, that’s your only choice.

Dale’s
oft-repeated phrases seemed meaningless in the face of this. She was about to
become my step-sister - what could be more impossible?

And
even if she wasn’t, it would be hard enough, with what I’d said tonight…with
what lay between us three years ago…

I
tried to tell myself the disgust and anger I’d seen in her eyes was a good
thing - it would keep me away, stop me doing anything rash - but it ate at me
anyway, even if I had invited it.

I’d
committed to seeing her tonight - to explaining myself and at least setting
things straight between us. It sucked balls that this was how I’d seen her, but
that didn’t mean I couldn’t set the past right.

Perhaps
that was all that was left to me now, and once I was done I could finally put
this obsession to bed. I’d hurt her once - I’d seen that in her expression
tonight - and we were brother and sister now. I wouldn’t hurt her again - but
after all this time apart, I needed a few moments with her in private.

I
finished dinner with a few questions to Terence, asking him about his business
and acting like I was thinking about anything but his daughter’s fair, pretty
skin writhing underneath me. He seemed only too happy to comply, regaling me
with tales of the tech industry and how his company was poised on the edge of
overtaking some new innovation. It sounded mind-numbingly boring to me, but he
was obviously pleased with it.

When
we were finally done, my mother offered to take me up to the room she’d had
prepared for me. The idea of staying here now twisted my gut in knots, but I’d
agreed - and even as frustrated as I was, I could see this was good for her, so
I didn’t say anything. I could always change my mind another day. For tonight,
there was the promise that Bella would be only a few rooms away - and the
burning need still to see her. So I took my mother’s directions and even
managed a moderately polite goodnight.

Then
I set off in search of Bella.

Chapter Three

Seth

Resting
my shoulder against the side of the door, I knocked and waited as I heard my
new step-sister moving inside and coming to answer. The rooms were stupid big
in this place.

As
soon as she saw me, her expression closed-off and I could see the obvious
temptation to slam the door in my face. Not giving her a chance to think about
it, I gave my casual smile and walked easily past her and inside.

“Hey!”

As
she spun to face me, I couldn’t help how much I adored the way outrage had
always puckered up her pretty, delicate features.

“What
the hell do you think you’re doing?”

So,
yeah, not welcome.

It
was expected, even if I wished it was undeserved.

I
just raised my eyebrows and gave her a long look, wanting the door closed
before I said any of what I’d come for.

“I
thought you’d prefer to talk in private, hmm?”

She
caught my meaning immediately, flushing and closing the door with a quick
glance outside before coming forward to glare at me. Such strong, passionate
eyes when she was riled up. I couldn’t help enjoying it just as much as I had
at eighteen, my body’s reaction showing me that the time apart hadn’t done
anything to diminish her effect on me.

I
cursed the fact she was off-limits yet again - this would be so much easier if
I could just push her up against the wall and show her just how much I’d missed
whatever that brief thing between us had been.

God
damn.

I
ignored that and took a breath, finally having her alone and in relative
privacy and wanting to at least explain the last three years…and try to discuss
the mess we were in now.

“About
before—”

Her
eyes flashed and back straightened, that stubborn set of her chin making my
body heat all over again.

“You
can’t tell anyone about that - my father would never forgive me!  As far as I’m
concerned, it never happened.”

That
was all it took to turn my conciliatory plan to anger, my mouth opening
instinctively, unable to accept that she cared more about what her father
thought than what had happened between us.

“Still
chasing Daddy’s approval, I see.”

Her
body tightened but despite that small indication, she stayed where she was, in
full disdainful control.

There
were a few officers who would have been impressed…

“It
was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made - don’t make it worse now, asshole.”

Damn
it, but this woman knew how to provoke me.

My
good intentions disappeared in the face of anger and need, and I sauntered
towards her stiff body, enjoying the way her eyes immediately turned wary. I
stepped up close, invading her personal space, but with the way our eyes held
each other she didn’t move. My mouth curved at the evidence of what I was sure
was running through her body as deeply as it was mine and I tilted my head, my
breath brushing her lips while I kept myself moments above her. Inches away
from every kiss we’d ever shared. My heartbeat thudded in my ears, something
akin to adrenaline surging as I felt her caught like this - under my gaze, my
body.

Electricity
jumped between the narrow space separating our bodies, the tingle of what could
be there almost stronger than if I’d actually touched her. Her eyes widened
with it and gave me just a glimmer of what I was looking for, lips parting just
a little as blood shot to my cock. I let the smile bloom full and deadly as my
hand finally broke the distance between us, curling in the strands of her hair
that were at last loose from the bob she kept them in and tilting her head
towards me.

“Is
that what you’re telling yourself, baby? Because I remember it differently - I
heard you gasp my name as you came at my word…your sweet moans while I drove
you crazy…felt your soft curves relax as you fit perfectly into my arms that
night…”

I
stepped back with those words reverberating in her mind, her eyes glazed for
just a moment before she jerked back, stepping away from me with a horrified
look on her face.

“Stop
it! You can’t talk like that, asshole. None of that meant anything - they can
never know!”

She
was clearly struggling not to yell now, and if part of me wasn’t turning to ash
inside I might even have been amused at her difficulty in trying not to cause a
scene someone would hear.

It
shouldn’t matter - I’d expected all this, and it wasn’t like we had a chance
even if she’d embraced me with open arms. But somehow her distress, her anger,
was twisting inside me and I wanted to wrap my arms around her, show her I’d
make it better and let her cry and rage against me as much as she needed.

It
was a stupid desire and it had no place between us now. There was a reason I
kept provoking, pushing her away, and it was best to stick to it - she’d made
very obvious she didn’t want anything from me.

My
explanations were unwanted, and I’d stick to my word - I wouldn’t drag her on
whatever dangerous path this crazy need inside of me was longing to go. I
wouldn’t hurt her like that again.

I
shrugged and let my face slip back into disinterest, my disdain for her concern
about her father’s opinion seeping in.

“Don’t
worry, babe - it wasn’t interesting enough for me to cause a scene.”

I could
see the words hit her, but the relief was written clearly on her face and she
just nodded at me, as if I’d confirmed something she’d always suspected.

“Good.”

It
twisted inside me a little, but it was for the best. The hateful jabs would
serve us better than the passionate mess that seemed to be bubbling just under
the surface. Better to kill it off now.

“Glad
that’s settled then. See ya around - Belle.”

I
gave her an ironic smile and turned to leave, resolving to stay as far away as
possible and cursing my mother to the depths of hell.