Hard Edge (11 page)

Chapter 21

Caden

I stopped my
mouth to look over at a very quiet Kenna. “Holy shit, I’ve been rambling on like an excited kid who just found a dinosaur bone in his backyard. You should have told me to shut up, Trinket.”

She laughed at my analogy. “Why would I do that when you look so darn cute in your state of giddiness? Although, I have to say, giddy is not a word I ever expected to use to describe you. I love that you’re so excited about your ride, Cade. And I especially love that you are acting like a kid who just found a dinosaur bone in his yard. I’m glad you came out here today.”

“I am too. Thanks for talking me into it.” I drummed a quick beat on my steering wheel to release some excited energy. “What do you think? Does it sound fucking crazy for me to get back into it? I was told I wouldn’t be competitive again because of my leg.” I patted my right thigh. “Hurts a little. But I think with a good trainer to help me build it back up so that it’s as strong as my left—” I laughed. “Shit, I’m doing it again. Change of topics. I’m starved.”

Kenna sighed. “Thank goodness. I’m ready to take off my sandal and start gnawing on it like jerky.”

“There’s a great burger stand just a few miles from here. And they’ve got chocolate shakes.”

“Perfect.”

I’d left the track with my head in the clouds and my feet ten inches off the ground, imagining myself back on a bike and racing. But as some of the adrenaline faded away, it occurred to me that Kenna was not her usual self.

“I hope you weren’t too bored sitting out there all morning.”

“Not at all. It was fun to watch. Scary. But fun. By the way, I don’t know if you should mention this ride to your dad.”

“Yep, that’s probably a good idea.” I glanced over at her. “You haven’t told me your opinion, Trinket. I need to hear what you think.”

“I think hamburgers and shakes sound good.”

“Kenna, you know what I’m asking.” And then it hit me. I was as thick as a fucking brick wall, especially when my mind was wrapped up in motorcycles and racing. “I know I’d have to travel a lot, but—”

She turned to look at me. “Don’t you dare make any decision based on how it would affect me, Cade. I couldn’t live with that. I couldn’t be happy knowing that you didn’t follow your dream because of me. This whole thing started so unexpectedly, and we never gave much thought to how any of this would work. We both have lived very separate and different lives up until now. This relationship couldn’t be more convoluted and twisted if we tucked it inside a darn pretzel. And yes, I realize how silly it sounds to compare us to a pretzel, but I’m obviously hungry.” She pointed through the windshield at the hamburger stand in the distance. “I get unreasonable and weepy and nothing seems plausible when I have low blood sugar. Let’s not talk about this right now.”

I didn’t know how to respond, but what I did know was that I’d probably say the wrong thing. Kenna was right. We’d twisted ourselves up good.

I turned the truck off the freeway. The smell of grilled onions filled the cab. Kenna took a deep breath. “See, I’m already feeling more human just breathing in the scent of food.” She relaxed back. “I’m sorry. I’ve just put a big, old cloud over your mood. I was trying hard to mask my feelings, but they were too strong for my poker face. And since I’m really bad at poker, I don’t think I had a great one to begin with.”

“You’re right though, some food will help us think straight. There has to be a way to make this all work. We just have to piece together all the parts. I’m going to tell you right now, Trinket, I’m not going to give up on what we started. I’ve been waiting too damn long for it.”

Chapter 22

Caden

Full stomachs had
helped lighten our moods for the rest of the drive home. Almost as soon as we walked into the beach house, Tanner had called me to talk about the day again. He sounded just as excited as I felt about the prospect of me racing again. But the ride home had reminded me that nothing in my life would be complete without Kenna. I’d finally found my way back to the girl I loved, and I didn’t want my career or anything else to get in the way of that.

Kenna had taken the rest of her wine bottle out to the lounges to watch the sunset. I finished talking to Tanner and headed out to join her. She didn’t look up when I slid open the screen door.

She was sitting on the end of the lounge sipping her wine. I straddled it behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. I pushed her hair aside and kissed the back of her neck.

She giggled and hunched her shoulders up. “That tickles.”

“Should I stop?”

“No, I like it.”

I kissed her neck again and slid my hands beneath her shirt. “Trinket, I want you as part of my life no matter what happens from this point on. You have to be. You can finish school, and I can figure out my own direction. Somewhere, somehow, we need to find a way to make it all work.”

Kenna rested back against me. “I feel the same way. I’ve always felt so in control of my life. I knew exactly what I was going to do. I was feeling pretty damn solid, but somewhere along the way, the ground beneath my feet softened. And now—now there’s you. Like a lightning bolt I never saw coming.”

She placed her wine on the ground and turned around to face me. “It’s a complication, an awesome complication, I wasn’t expecting, and one that has made me rethink everything.”

I couldn’t stop myself from reaching up to touch her face. It was impossible not to touch her when she was close. Her eyes closed at the feel of my hand.

“Let’s figure out a way to make it uncomplicated, Trinket. Because, at the end of it all, the only thing I know for sure is that you are right here.” I touched my chest. “You’ve been there forever, and I don’t ever see that changing for me.”

Kenna took hold of my hand and traced her finger along the lines on my palm. “Wish I was a fortune teller. Then I could see how all this turns out. Or maybe I don’t want to know.” She lifted her gaze to me. She pressed her hand against her chest. “You’ve always been here for me too. But—”

“Uh oh, that’s not a word that should follow. But what?”

She shook her head.

“Tell me, Kenna.”

Her eyes were glassy as she looked at me again. “We were both in a really vulnerable state when we started this. As right as it seems, I worry that it’s fragile, and it’s all going to break apart.”

I took hold of her face and kissed her hard.

“There’s not a fucking fragile thing about it, Kenna. It will only break apart if we let it happen. I want you. That’s all I fucking know.” I stood up and climbed off the lounge to head back inside.

She followed me inside and grabbed my hand. “It’s what I want too, Cade.”

She wrapped her arms around my neck and jumped into my arms, wrapping her legs around my waist. We kissed as I carried her down the hallway to the bedroom.

I pushed the door open with my foot and marched to the bed. I lowered her onto the mattress. My fingers pulled impatiently at the button on her shorts. I had her naked in seconds.I pushed my pants off, climbed onto the bed and pulled her beneath me. I cradled her face in my hands and kissed her as I pushed inside of her. She moaned softly against my mouth as my cock filled her.

She opened her eyes and peered up at me as I rocked against her.

“You belong with me, Kenna. It’s all I fucking know.”

Chapter 23

Kenna

I turned my
head and set my gaze on the man sleeping next to me. The morning sun highlighted him perfectly, showing the strong lines of his handsome face accented by the highly enviable dark lashes.

We’d spent the rest of the night in each other’s arms and everything about it felt permanent and right. But morning light always brought bittersweet reality and clear thinking. I was ridiculously addicted to clear thinking. I didn’t know how to change, but for once, I wished I could just stay clouded in my thoughts and my judgment. Logic sure had a way of screwing up happiness. Especially for me.

I tried to get up quietly, but Caden stirred in his sleep. Then, without opening his eyes, he grabbed my hand. “You do not have permission to leave this bed, honey bunch.”

“I’m in the mood for pancakes, and they aren’t going to make themselves.”

He opened his eyes. “Pancakes? Why didn’t you say so?” He waved toward the bedroom door. “Carry on. I like mine with lots of butter.”

He watched as I pulled on my clothes. I decided not to bring up any of it for now, the racing, my law school, the future of our relationship. For once, I was just going to let things flow in their natural direction. To hell with logic and reasoning. We’d be back in Mayfair today, and we had more time to spend together. For now, that was enough. Life had a way of working out or not working out. I would wait to see what happened next.

Caden got up on his elbows. “What time do you need to get back to Mayfair?”

“After breakfast, if that works for you.”

“It doesn’t. I want to stay here. In bed. With you. Preferably naked.”

“As lovely as that sounds, I’ve got to go home and pack truffles.”

He groaned in disapproval as he sat up to get dressed.

I headed out to the kitchen to get the pancakes started. I found a big mixing bowl and pulled out the pancake mix and two eggs. My mom had sent me some rather terse, business style texts, which meant she was still not pleased about me spending time at the beach with Caden. I was not looking forward to being stuck in her truffle factory packing chocolates while she grilled me and tossed her unnecessary advice my way.

I picked up my phone and texted her that I’d be home in two hours. Then I turned to the stove to heat up the griddle. Caden walked out just as there was a knock on the front door.

He opened it, and a beautiful girl came flying into his arms. “Cade, I’m so sorry. I heard about your brother, and—” She tried to kiss him, but he pulled his face back.

“Mindy, I thought you were in Europe.”

“I was but I got bored because you never showed up. Then I heard about your brother.” I stepped out from the kitchen. Caden’s guest noticed me for the first time. Her perfectly bow shaped lips formed an O and then she smiled. “Oh my gosh, I should have called first.” She looked at Caden with a raised brow. “What was I thinking? I should have known you wouldn’t be alone.” She left Caden’s embrace and walked toward me with her outstretched hand, a million dollar smile and the most flawless skin I’d ever seen. “I’m Mindy. I’m so sorry to have intruded on your morning.”

“No need to apologize. I’m Kenna. Nice to meet you.”

Mindy’s gaze turned to the kitchen. “Pancakes?” she asked enthusiastically.

“Yes, please stay. I was just about to start breakfast.” I flashed a smile Caden’s direction. He looked less than thrilled about the prospect of a pancake threesome. I should have been jealous and upset, but it would have been a waste of energy. The beautiful, friendly Mindy was easy to like, and I wasn’t going to start kidding myself. I knew Caden had plenty of women in his life. He’d certainly had no shortage of girlfriends when we were growing up in Mayfair, and the adult Caden was even more irresistible than the teenage version.

So it was settled that there would be a guest for breakfast. Like the perfect hostess, I set Mindy up with a glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee, and tried my damndest not to catalog her many incredible attributes and compare them to my less than spectacular counterparts.

Mindy walked out to the chaise lounges with her morning drinks, stretched out her unbelievable, perfectly shaven legs and began a long string of phone calls.

Caden came into the kitchen to help. He walked up behind, wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck. “You didn’t have to invite her.”

“Yes, I did. She just came back early from Europe because she was bored. Apparently, because you didn’t join her there.”

“Kenna—”

I spun around with an egg perched on my hand. “I’m not upset, Cade. Really. Other than the fact that she makes me feel like a troll when I’m standing in the same room with her, she seems very nice.”

He pulled me against him, and the egg dropped to the floor. He ignored the mess he caused. “Troll, my ass. Mindy’s got nothing on you, Trinket.”

A short laugh shot from my mouth. “Don’t even go there, Cade, because it just sounds silly. She is gorgeous.” I rubbed my fingers along his beard stubble. “You didn’t just land on this planet a week ago. I know you had a life, and I’m sure that life had plenty of
close
acquaintances. So you don’t have to say any more about it.”

He gazed at me with that look of admiration that I was getting so used to, I wasn’t sure what I’d do if it ever faded. “Could you be any more fucking perfect?”

“Unfortunately”—I glanced through the sliding glass door at the beauty on the lounge outside—“yes, I could, and I’d like to start with a pair of legs that look like that.”

Caden opened his mouth to protest, but I pressed my finger over it. “Not a word. Comparing ourselves to other women is instinctual, it’s what we do, so don’t bother trying to stop it.” I kissed him. “Now clean up the egg you made me drop, so I can get the pancakes made.”

The kitchen was the size of a closet, and Caden was big. He hovered around me as I swept from fridge to counter to stove, making the task that much harder. I stopped and looked at him with a frustrated sigh. “Go outside and sit with her. I don’t mind. Really. You take up too much space in this kitchen.”

“Guess I’m not a big help.” He poured himself a cup of coffee and walked outside.

I worked my hardest trying not to stare out the window at them. Together they looked like a couple posing for a magazine. My mood slowly sank as I wondered just how the heck I’d imagined this would ever work—Caden and me, a couple.

The obligatory failure of the first pancake passed. I dumped the odd looking pile of half-cooked batter into the sink and poured the second pancake. I kept my focus and my mind on the griddle. It helped me to not think about how I’d foolishly stepped into something that I wouldn’t find my way out of without leaving behind a chunk of my heart. I thought back to the day an eighteen-year-old Caden had walked away from us at the airport terminal. He was off to boot camp, and when he looked back to wave, his gaze landed on me. I was only sixteen and about as smitten and in love with the guy as any girl could be. I remembered being ridiculously thrilled that he’d looked at me before heading into the terminal. His parents and his brother were standing with me, but his eyes stayed on me and our gazes locked until he pulled his away and disappeared around the corner. I cried myself to sleep that night and for several nights afterward. For months, I tried to repeat those few seconds at the airport over and over in my head, but eventually it faded away. I had to convince myself not to read too much into it, but I kept that moment deep in my heart. These past few days had brought back that memory and the idea that I hadn’t been imagining it at all.

The sliding door opened. Caden and Mindy were laughing as they walked inside. Caden disappeared down the hallway to the bathroom.

“Oh wow, do those smell good. I didn’t touch any of the plane food, and I’m starved.” Mindy stepped into the kitchen. “Can I help with something?”

I motioned toward the refrigerator. “There’s a basket of strawberries you could wash and cut.”

“Absolutely.” She opened the refrigerator and laughed. “It’s a lot better stocked than the last time I was here.”

I stared down at the sizzling pancake.

“Shit, what a stupid thing to say,” Mindy said behind me. She turned on the water to rinse the berries.

I reached down under the stove for the cutting board and handed it to her.

She took hold of my hand. “Sweetie, just so you know, he just spent the last ten minutes talking about you. He’s over the top, over the moon, whatever you want to call it. And I know him well. Caden Stratton never talks about anyone the way he was talking about you.” She picked up a berry and took a bite.

I smiled and pointed my spatula back over my shoulder to let her know I had to get back to the pancakes. I turned back around to face the stove. My smile widened more.

“Caden tells me you grew up with him in Mayfair and that you were best friends with his brother, Grady.” The knife tapped the cutting board as she continued with her berry task.

“Yes. I moved in across the street from the Strattons when I was in first grade. Grady was the same age.” I turned sideways to the stove to keep an eye on the griddle while talking. “We spent a lot of time together. Caden occasionally honored us with his presence.”

“Yep, I let them hang out with me when I was in a generous mood,” Caden said as he came into the kitchen. He walked over to the finished pile of pancakes and plucked one off the top. He dragged it across the stick of butter I’d been using to grease the griddle and rolled it like a cigar. He took a bite. “Hmm, these are good.”

“I’m glad you like it. I’m all done here. Let’s sit down and eat.” I turned off the stove and followed them to the table.

I was curious to see just how many pancakes a hungry swimsuit model would eat. She stabbed her fork in the stack and took two pancakes off the top. She wasn’t shy on the butter or syrup either. I was relieved to see she had a normal human appetite. I hated to gobble down pancakes slathered in syrup while our guest nibbled like a mouse, took two bites, and then declared herself full. Of course, my relief was dampened some by the realization that the woman could eat buttery pancakes and still look as if she subsisted on kale and water.

Mindy smiled at me before flashing her pearly white teeth at Caden. “There’s something that just looks right about this.” Her hand swept in an arc between us. “You two seem right for each other. I’m going to miss our—” She stopped midsentence after a quelling look from Caden. But it was too late. I knew where she had been heading with it. “I’m happy for you, Stratton. Really.”

“Thanks, Min.”

Mindy chewed and swallowed her first bite of food as if she was eating the best food on earth. “Oh my gosh, heaven in my mouth. Well done you,” she said with a wink. “On everything.” She tilted her head toward Caden.

Caden didn’t seem to notice. “Hey, I didn’t tell you, I met Tanner out at the speedway yesterday and took a new Yamaha out for a spin.”

Apparently, Mindy knew Tanner, which meant she’d been around during Caden’s racing days. Somehow knowing they had a rich, fun history together was harder to swallow than the notion that they’d been having sex.

“By taking it for a spin, you mean flying around a track at the speed of light,” Mindy quipped. She looked at me for agreement.

I nodded. “He was basically a blur once he got on the thing. And it took him several hours to stop wearing a toothy grin.”

“Yep, I’ve seen that smile.” Mindy looked at Caden. “You’re not actually thinking about racing again?” She turned to me. “I was there the day of the accident. What a fucking nightmare that was.”

“Shit, Mindy. Sorry I brought it up. And yeah, I might start racing again. Let’s change the subject. Where are you off to next?”

Mindy had only finished half a pancake, but she leaned back as if she was done. It was a ploy. She pretended to eat like a normal person, but it was a front. It actually made me feel better knowing she at least had to suffer some to keep her figure. “I was thinking I was going to hang out here for a week, but you’re busy. I’ve got a shoot in Florida next week. I might head there early.”

Caden took another pancake from the stack. “We’re leaving today. I’ve got the place for ten more days so someone might as well use it. Just don’t throw any fucking parties. I want my deposit back.”

Mindy pulled out her phone as it rang. “You’re a doll. I’ll take you up on that.” She walked outside to take the phone call.

I swirled my fork around the pool of maple syrup on my empty plate.

Caden tapped my foot with his. “Are you all right?”

I shrugged. “I guess. So she’ll be staying here?”

“I’m not going to come back here. I’m staying in Mayfair with you until you decide to go to New York. If you want, I’ll take back the invitation.”

“No, shit no, don’t do that. I’m fine with it. She’s very likable.” I stared at her hardly touched plate. “Who takes two pancakes and only eats a half? That kind of self-control is not normal.”

Caden smiled and leaned over to kiss me. “Hmm, maple and butter. Those flavors taste good on you.” He took hold of my chin and kissed me again. “Did I happen to mention that I’m nuts about you?”

“Not recently, but after eating breakfast with a beautiful blast from your past I could hear it again.”

He gazed at me and my heart melted like the butter on my plate. “Kenna Ridley, I’m completely fucking nuts about you.”