Hardline (18 page)

  
“I can appreciate that.” It would have been much easier to rebuff his attempt at a truce via email. Despite Blake’s fervent hatred for the man, I now found myself considering this bridge between our companies.
 

  
Simone swung by with our coffee, already conveniently steaming from to-go cups. He handed her a bill and thanked her before turning to leave.

  
“Who was that?”
 
Simone asked.

  
“A prospective advertiser.” Was he? Was I seriously considering this truce bridge between our companies? I wasn’t totally convinced that his intentions were all bad, though I wasn’t exactly inclined to forgive him either.
 

  
“Looks like a good prospect. He tipped me like forty bucks.”

  
I managed a laugh. She sidled up to the seat that he’d occupied. “What’s going on? Are you avoiding me?”

  
I took a sip of my coffee, too tired to paint on a face that wasn’t mine. Her eyes narrowed.
 

  
“Simone, at the risk of pissing you off and creating tension between you and James, I need to tell you something.”

  
“James kissed you. I know.”

  
My eyes went wide. “You know?”

  
“Yeah, he told me the other day. Said Blake went nutso on him, telling him to give his notice.”
 

  
“Fuck,” I muttered, as much in reflection of that afternoon as to the fact that she knew about it.
 

  
“Listen, you need to figure this out with James. This is kind of what I was worried about with the love triangle stuff, but…”

  
“But what?”

  
“Erica, I care about James. I mean, we’ve been hanging out for a while, and I know he cares about you. He assures me that he’s over any romantic hang up he had with you, but he still very much considers you a friend. I don’t know if he and Blake can get past this, but you’re in the driver’s seat here. It’s your call.”
 

  
I groaned. “I hate this. All of it. Blake has me in an awful position right now. I don’t want to fire James, and I’m furious with Blake for confronting him. He did
not
have my blessing to do that. He’s obviously very jealous and can’t stand the idea of me working every day with someone who made a pass at me.”

  
She upturned her red lips.

  
“I’ll talk to James. And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry all this is affecting you. I think you and James are great together. I really do. I consider you both my friends, and the last thing I want to do is come between you over this. Unfortunately, Blake’s jealousy is a persistent reminder of an indiscretion that I’m sure both James and I would rather forget. I know we both want to move on, and I hope we can.”

  
“It’s not an easy situation. This doesn’t affect our friendship though, no matter what. I’m still your girl. Bitches first, okay?”

  
I laughed, and she held out her hand for a fist pump. I met it, and she slid off her seat.

  
“Go fix your crazy life, and I’m going to serve up some more rocket fuel to the addicts here, all right?”

  
“Sounds like a plan. Thanks.”

  
She smirked before sauntering off. I grabbed my coffee and left the café feeling just a little bit lighter. At least that was one fire I didn’t need to put out.

  
At the office, I spent the morning catching up on emails before Alli popped in to brief me on advertising progress. She’d picked up two more accounts, which was a strong start in making up for the lost revenue we’d incurred. I was tallying some quick figures when she interrupted me.
 

  
“So what’s going on with you and Blake?”

  
I looked up to her worried eyes. I sighed and dropped my pen. I’d need to spill at some point. After running out on her party, she was bound to wonder what had gone down between Blake and me to make me leave.
 

  
“Nothing to worry about. Bumps in the road, I guess.”
 

  
“I’m
going
to worry about you. Especially when Blake is at my place late, holed up with Heath having some sort of brotherly heart-to-heart til midnight.”

  
I fidgeted in my seat. “I didn’t realize he’d stayed that long.”

  
“He didn’t come home?”

  
I shook my head.
 

  
“Where do you think he went?”

  
I clicked my pen nervously. “I honestly have no idea.”
 

  
“What happened between you two? You’ve been acting strange since you got back from San Francisco. I thought things went well.”

  
“They did, on the business front. But we ran into Risa there. Listen, I can’t talk about this here. Do you want to grab a drink tonight after work? I can try to explain it all...somehow.”
 

  
I suppressed a groan. That conversation was going to be all kinds of fucked up.
 

  
“Okay. I’m going to step out to pick up some lunch. Do you want anything?”

  
“Sure, just get me whatever you’re having.”

  
She left me alone then, and a minute later James took her place in the chair behind my desk.
 

  
“You have a minute?”

  
“Sure.”
 

  
I shuffled some papers around on my desk, for no reason at all other than to delay whatever he was going to say. But Simone was right. We needed to talk. We needed to get to the bottom of this. I let my forehead fall into my hands. We hadn’t even said anything and I was losing my shit. I took in a deep breath. “We should talk.”

  
He leaned back into his chair, eying me. “You’re not going to fire me, are you?”

  
“No.” I sulked back into the chair. No amount of coffee was going to make this conversation bearable. “I’m so sorry about all of this. Honestly, I don’t know where this all went wrong, but I’m desperate to fix it. I’m just lost about how to do it in a way that everyone can live with.”

  
“Landon’s the only one with his panties in a twist about it. The rest of us are being adults. I don’t see why you need to cater to his temper tantrums unless he’s financially threatening you.”

  
“He would never do that. And…I don’t know, James. I put him in a difficult situation that’s kind of impossible for me to explain to you.”
 

  
“Something to do with this Daniel guy, I’m guessing?”

  
“It’s more complicated than you can possibly understand. Not because you’re not capable of understanding it… but some things are better kept private. And yes. Daniel had a big part in me and Blake not being together. Everything kind of became more and more fucked up after that until we found our way back together again. When he realized what happened between you and me…” I sighed, closing my eyes. “I guess you could say it was the last straw, and now I’m sort of grappling with how to make things right between us.”

  
He hesitated a moment. “I care about you, Erica. I care about this job too, but if you’re going to stay with Blake and as a result, my being here is making your life unnecessarily difficult, I should go. I don’t like this tension any more than you do.”

  
“But I don’t want you to go. You’re important to the company, and to me. Despite everything that’s happened, you’re still a friend. And I’m not going to fire a friend.”

  
He chewed his lip, tapping his thumb on the edge of the chair looking lost in thought. “Would it help if I wasn’t here?”

  
“What do you mean? I just told you—”

  
“I mean, in the office. Would it be easier if I wasn’t here in the office every day? I could work from home. I mean, it’s a technicality, but if it means keeping my job and staying with the company, it’s something worth considering.”

  
I did just that. “You’d be willing to do that?”

  
“Sure. And if eventually you want someone else in house, I can transition out. Maybe go out on my own. Freelance or whatever.”
 

  
I wrinkled my nose, not liking that part of the proposal. “I hate this.”
 

  
“I do too, but it’s not your fault. I’m not sure what Blake is making you believe, but I should have backed off as soon as I knew you were coming out of a relationship. You needed a friend, and I failed you in that regard.”

  
“You didn’t fail.”

  
“I jumped to conclusions. About a lot of things. This is my doing too, and if I have to make sacrifices for it, so be it.”
 

  
“I appreciate the offer. But let’s not make any hasty decisions.”

  
“I don’t think it’s hasty, honestly. It’s more like a long time in the making. I can see you’re stressed. You haven’t been yourself all week, and I hate to see you this way. I don’t want to be the cause of that. I never have been and I never will. But if we can make this change, at least for now, and that gives you some relief or room to fix things with him, we should do it.”
 

  
“I’m hoping he’ll cool down a little. Maybe I can try to reason with him.” That was a big maybe.
 

  
He leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees. “You want to marry Blake, right?”

  
I paused. “Yes.”

  
“Personally, I can’t stand the guy, but obviously he’s important to you. Important enough that you said yes when he proposed. I don’t want to be the person who fucks that up for you. We made a mess with this workplace relationship thing, and now we both need to clean it up.”
 

  
I offered a slight nod, wishing there wasn’t so much truth in what he was saying. “Maybe you’re right.”

  
“It’s not what either of us wants, but maybe it’s the right thing.”
 

The rest of the day sped by. Maybe not all hope was lost in the landscape of my life. New accounts were coming in, I was at peace with Simone, and at least for now, James and I had a plan on how to move forward. I couldn’t deny that the thought of him leaving the company broke my heart a little though. He’d become part of the team, as well as a friend. I would miss seeing him every day, and I couldn’t help but resent that Blake was putting me in a position to make him go. As I dwelled on that thought, Alli popped in to remind me of our after-dinner date.
 

  
I pulled my things together to leave. A few minutes later, Clay dropped us at a trendy sushi spot on a busy street. Alli and I ordered Mai Tais. I sucked the sweet drink down and politely asked the waitress for another when she delivered our assorted rolls. Today was simply one of those days. If nothing else, maybe the alcohol would put me to sleep when I went home to our empty bed again.

  
“So James is going to be working from home for a while.” I finally blurted it out, knowing that Alli’s tense silence was filled with her unspoken questions about what the hell was going on.
 

  
Alli frowned. “Why?”

  
I took a deep breath. “When Blake and I weren’t together, James and I started to hang out more, as friends. I tried to keep things professional, but he started to want more. Eventually he made a pass at me, and...”

  
Alli’s dropped her jaw dropped. “You didn’t...”

  
“We kissed. It was brief, and I wanted it to end about three seconds after it started. Apparently Risa saw the whole thing, and this weekend at the awards event, she told Blake about it. I’m guessing she wanted to get back at me and mess with our relationship. Unfortunately, it worked. Blake was beside himself. We fought. He wanted James gone...or else.”

  
I shoved a piece of sushi in my mouth, hating that he’d won. That I’d given him what he wanted.

  
Alli stared, unmoving with wide eyes. “I wasn’t expecting all of that.”

  
“Well that’s why I never told you. It was a mistake, and I wanted it to go away, but it hasn’t, so now I’m paying for it.”

  
“So is everything okay between you now that James isn’t going to be in the office?”

  
“I have no idea. We haven’t really talked.”
 

  
I mangled one of my rolls as I thought about the awful distance that had come between us in the past few days. As angry as I was with Blake, I hated every minute when we fought. Nothing was right when we weren’t together, and I could only hope all that would change now.
 

  
“Any way, how are things going with Heath? Give me some hope. Things seem to be perfect with you two right now.”

  
She shrugged and placed a slice of ginger on one of her rolls. “I wouldn’t say perfect.”

  
I lifted an eyebrow. “Trouble in paradise?”

  
She laughed, but her smile quickly faded. “I don’t know. I worry about him.”

  
“That’s understandable, but has he given you a reason to?”

  
“That’s the thing. Not really. But I can’t help but worry. He finished the program, and ever since it’s like I haven’t been able to shake this feeling that he’s going to slip up again.”

  
“But he has you. He has Blake and work and his family. It seems like he’s on the right track. Everything is going so well, isn’t it?”