Heart of Light (9 page)

She finally realized that she needed to forget about the girl she used to be. Jolene Bergio died the minute she left her house on the outskirts of Houston all those years ago. The girl staring back in the mirror now was a new Jolene, and she finally had a second chance at life. She wasn’t going to live it in fear of being found, although she knew that would always be in the back of her mind. It could all come crashing down on her at any minute but, until it did, she was going to enjoy her new life, even if it killed her.

~~~~~~~~~~

“C
OME
ON
, T
OMORROW
,” E
LSIE
said, getting out of her car. “Bar’s this way.” She gestured with her head a few blocks from where they parked.

Jolene followed, a bit apprehensive, wondering if she made the right decision. Scanning the busy downtown sidewalks, she felt completely out of her element. What
was
her element? It was as if she didn’t even know who she was as a person.
He
molded her into what he wanted her to be. Now that she was on her own and making her own decisions, she was constantly second-guessing herself, contemplating whether it was the right thing to do.

“You know what?” Jolene said, getting Elsie’s attention as they walked the few short blocks to the bar. “I’m not going to spend another second of my time worried about what
he
thinks I should do. This is my fucking life and I’m taking back control of it.”

Elsie continued walking, smiling at her. “You go, girlfriend. This
is
your fucking life, and I’m going to make sure you enjoy every second of it.”

Jolene gave Elsie a sincere smile, thankful that she didn’t pry, making her feel surprisingly comfortable with the company of her new friend. And that’s what Elsie was…a friend. She finally had a friend. Step one in taking back control.

“This is The Palace,” Elsie explained, stopping outside of an old brick building. “I know it doesn’t look like much from the outside, but it’s a fun place, and they do Open Mic every Thursday night. It’s kind of a tradition with our crew. Do you sing or play?” she asked, opening the door.

“I used to play piano,” she said sadly, remembering learning to play when she was just a little girl.

Elsie noticed her reaction. “Don’t worry about it. I can’t play an instrument to save my life. And I have a horrible voice. I’m completely inept when it comes to music.” She winked. “Come on.”

Jolene followed her into the spacious, dimly-lit bar. It was only a little past nine and the place was already packed with what she assumed was a mixture of locals and tourists looking to have a good time before returning to the monotony of their every day life.

The bouncer nodded a greeting to the girls. “Who’s your new friend, Else?” the tall, muscular blond asked.

“New girl in town. If you ever see her in here, just remember she’s a friend of mine, so treat her accordingly.”

“Got it.” He returned to checking IDs. Jolene was thankful when he didn’t ask for hers because she didn’t have one. She didn’t have anything that could identify her as who she really was, almost as if
he
wanted it that way. As if
he
wanted the world to think that she had become a ghost all those years ago.

“What’s your poison, Tomorrow?” Elsie asked, leading her through the growing crowd of people in the bar.

She shrugged. “I’m happy with a beer. Red Stripe is fine with me.”

“You got it. But we’re doing shots, too. Tequila okay?”

Jolene laughed. “Absolutely.”

“Good. Wait here.” Elsie pointed to an empty table. “I’ll be back in a few with our drinks.”

Jolene sat down, her eyes growing wide in shock when she noticed her friend jump behind the bar and grab their drinks. Glancing around, it appeared to be quite a popular place, crowds of people laughing and drinking, trying to make their voices heard over the DJ playing classic rock tunes. It all seemed so normal to her. Everyone appeared to be rather carefree as they hung out with their friends and family. She wondered if she would have been that laid back and relaxed if she hadn’t been ripped from her life all those years ago. She probably would have gone on to college. She may already even have a family by now. Her blood rose when she thought about everything that
he
had taken from her.

“Bottoms up, Tomorrow,” Elsie said, waking Jolene from her thoughts.

“Do you work here, too?” she asked, grabbing her beer and taking a much-needed sip.

“Nah. But it’s kind of an unspoken rule on this island. Bartend at one bar, free rein to grab your drinks at any other bar. Call it professional courtesy. You’ll learn the ropes,” she explained, pushing a shot glass across the table. “To new friends.” Elsie raised the small glass containing a clear liquid.

Jolene mirrored her movements. “New friends,” she repeated, clinking glasses with Elsie before throwing back the liquor, the alcohol warming her entire body as it traveled through her. The shock of it made her cough.

“Not a big tequila drinker, are you?” Elsie asked as Jolene choked through the shot.

“Not much of a big anything drinker, really,” she admitted, trying to catch her breath. “But that was in my old life. I’m starting a new chapter. My real life starts tonight. And who knows?” She shrugged. “Maybe the new me will end up liking tequila.”

“Well, only one way to find out. More shots!” Elsie shouted so half the bar could hear her. She nodded to the bartender behind the counter and he began pouring another round from the Patron bottle.

After her third or fourth shot, Jolene stopped worrying about whether
he
would find her. She lowered her guard for the first time in days and finally relaxed into her new life, the hours passing with ease as the girls got to know each other.

“What the fuck are they doing here?” Elsie slurred a few hours later, staring at the entrance.

Jolene turned to see who she was looking at. Her heart skipped a beat when her vision unexpectedly fell on those beautiful silver eyes. Eyes that just that morning were cold and removed, but became warm and caring throughout the day. Eyes that she could not erase from her mind all evening. Eyes that, when she thought of the person they belonged to, made her stomach do summersaults.

She didn’t know why she felt that way about someone she had just met and who had behaved like a complete ass during their first meeting, but there was something about the tall man that made her want to find out more about him.

“Good evening, ladies,” Benny said, approaching their table.

“If you even think about joining us, you better think again,” Elsie spat out, not even missing a beat. “It’s girls’ night so, unless you have a vagina, be on your way.”

Jolene tore her eyes from Cam’s, her face flaming red at Elsie’s words.

“Awww… I made the new girl blush.” Elsie grinned in amusement. “Get used to it. I wasn’t born with any brain-to-mouth filter.”

Benny rolled his eyes. “Yeah. That’s definitely the truth. She’s got quite the mouth on her.”

She smacked him playfully on the ass. “I didn’t hear you complaining about my mouth last night, Benjamin.”

“Enjoy your evening, ladies,” Cam interrupted. “I’m not sure about Benny here, but I certainly do
not
have a vagina.” He raised his eyebrows at Jolene.

Just one look and she was ready to drop everything she had learned over the last ten years. One look and she wanted to melt into her barstool. One look and she was a blubbering mess, incapable of even putting together one coherent thought.

She gawked as the two men made their way across the crowded room to an empty high-top table of their own, meeting Cam’s eyes once more. “I love that smolder,” she remarked quietly when he smiled at her.

“Hey! Tomorrow! Back to earth. You are
so
checking out Cam and not even trying to hide it, girlfriend. Come on. You’re practically drooling. And what was that? Did I hear you correctly? Did you just say that you love Cam’s smolder?” She giggled.

Jolene snapped back to reality, looking at her new friend, who was grinning from ear-to-ear.

“You’re blushing so hard right now. Looks like you’ve got it pretty bad for my boyfriend’s best friend, don’t you?” She took a long drag from her beer, emptying it.

Jolene relaxed back into her chair. “I know that I should hate him for the way he treated me this morning, but then… I don’t know.” She exhaled loudly as she recalled the few encounters she had with Cam throughout the day. “Even when he was all pissed, I saw this warmth in his eyes. It was almost like it was harder for him to be a prick than it should have been if that was truly what he was like. I could be wrong, but I don’t think I am.”

“No. You’re right,” Elsie said in agreement. “Cam is definitely not an ass or a prick, but he’s certainly been hurt in the past. The last girl did a number on him. That whole fiasco was a train wreck we all saw coming for miles, but he refused to see it for himself.”

She grabbed two more beers from their server, nodding in appreciation and handing a bottle to Jolene. “I’m just going to warn you, and I apologize if I come off a bit bitchy, but I need to be straightforward here. I like you. He likes you. But I love him like I would a brother. He’s always been there for me, no matter what. Don’t get involved with him if you have no intention of having anything serious or long-term with him. I finally saw my real friend today after months of him being absent, and I know that I have you to thank for that. You brought him back. I’m not sure how you did it, but you did. I want him to stay. So if you being here does it for him, I’m happy. But please, no matter what you do, don’t hurt him.”

Elsie’s candor surprised Jolene but, at the same time, she knew her concerns came from a good place. Elsie was someone who cared so much for her friend that she felt compelled to make sure Jolene was good enough for him. She realized Elsie was the type of person to bend over backwards for you no matter what…to help you through whatever crisis life threw at you. Someone she could trust with her deepest and darkest secrets.

“My real name’s Jolene,” she said quietly, surprised at the words leaving her mouth, but she couldn’t stop. She wanted to tell someone, and she knew that it should be Elsie. “I spent the last ten years of my life locked away and auctioned off to the highest bidder on a nightly basis for them to do whatever they wanted.”

Elsie stared at her in shock, stunned that she just shared so much personal information with her. “Tomorrow…”

“A man appeared on my doorstep when I was just fifteen-years-old with a document giving him guardianship over me until I was eighteen. I thought it was my lucky day, getting to go live in a beautiful new place and have people wait on me hand and foot. Then I turned eighteen and it all changed.
He
changed.” She nervously scanned the bar, now that her big secret was out there in the open.

“Who?”

“I’m not ready to say that, Elsie. He has very powerful friends all over the country. One slip of the name and it’s over for me. I know it’s stupid, but I can’t risk anyone…” Her voice grew quiet and unsteadied. She lowered her gaze as she nervously fidgeted with her beer bottle.

Elsie reached across the table, stopping just short of her hand, surprising her when she didn’t touch her. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say it. I get it. Don’t worry. Your secret’s safe with me. I won’t say anything, not even to Benny.”

“So you understand why, if I leave, it’s not to hurt you or Cam or anyone else. It’s to protect you…and myself.” She met Elsie’s eyes, giving her a sincere look, wanting her to see the truth behind her words. “If they figure out where I am, I’ll have to run again. I’ll need to disappear without a trace. I wasn’t just one of his girls. I was
his
girl, and the boss’ girl doesn’t get away. It just doesn’t happen. I was lucky to get out at all, and I’d rather die than go back to that life.”

She turned her head in the direction of the table where Cam was sitting with Benny. Meeting his eyes, her grim expression turned into one of hope and an infectious smile crept across her face. Quickly breaking her gaze from him, she returned her attention to Elsie.

“I like Cam. There’s a kindness to him that I’ve never seen before. And maybe I’m a little selfish to want to finally have a crush on a guy…a normal crush that I should have experienced years ago, but had that taken away from me. But I want that, Elsie. I want that more than I can remember ever wanting anything. I have butterflies when I look at him. I’ve never felt that before. I don’t feel an overwhelming sense of dread and fear when I look at him. I feel warm and safe. I’m both scared and confused about why he has this kind of effect on me. Hell, he was a complete prick to me earlier this morning.”

“Yeah. But you know how to read people,” Elsie observed. “You knew it was just a front.”

“Yeah. I guess,” Jolene responded weakly.

“Let’s stop with all the heavy stuff. My advice to you… Don’t worry too much about where you think your attraction to Cam will go. Just take it one day at a time. Become his friend, and let him become your friend. No expectations. Sound good?”

“How do you seem to have an answer for everything?” she asked, lightening the mood.

“You bartend long enough, you become everyone’s favorite therapist, which pisses Cam off, considering that’s his line of business.”

“What do you mean? He bartends, too?”

Elsie laughed. “No. He’s a shrink. Like, a legitimate one. A very well-respected and sought after psychiatrist, if you want to know the truth.”

“God…” Jolene leaned back into the barstool, rolling her eyes, almost in disbelief. “He’d have a field day if he got in my head then, wouldn’t he?”

“Only if you let him in your head.” Elsie raised her beer bottle and Jolene followed suit, her eyes roaming the bar and meeting those kind silver eyes once more. She couldn’t stop looking at him.

“Want to go dance?” Elsie asked, nodding to the dance floor set up by the DJ booth. “Or is it too crowded?”

Jolene took a deep breath. “No. It’s fine. I want a normal life. And isn’t getting wasted and dancing the night away a rite of passage?”