Heartbeat (4 page)

“Charlie, I need you to hear me out,” Rick said as he followed me into the bathroom. Rick was four years older than me but throughout our entire relationship he acted as if he had to talk to me like I was a child. It’s funny how it never bothered me as much as it did right now.

After I managed to ignore him while brushing my teeth, I walked into my closet to get dressed for the day. I looked around at all of the clothes and shoes couldn’t have cared less what I was going to wear. As I stood in the closet, I wondered what crossed Rick’s mind as he passed his ruined clothing in the foyer. Good thing he had the good sense not to mention it.

“Charlie! Are you going to talk to me?” His voice was desperate now and I hated how bad I wanted him to get on one knee and beg for my forgiveness. I wanted him to take me in his arms and promise me he would never ever hurt me like this again. But I knew if he attempted to touch me, I would scream and try to claw my way out of his arms, although at this very moment, it was all I really wanted.

I looked up at him and as soon as my eyes met his, I was reminded why I always saw my forever when I looked into his eyes. But now, all I saw was his betrayal. Now, all I saw was him with
her
; his slut. “Look, Rick. I think it would be best if you just went to your parents’ house or something cause you can’t stay here.” I tried to keep my voice steady but I was breaking down inside with each word I spoke.

“Charlie, what are you talking about? It doesn’t have to be this way.”

I wanted to hit him, slap him, throw something at him. Instead, I just stood there and told myself to remain calm, looking at the man who had the nerve to cheat on me. Rick was no longer the best looking man, age hadn’t been kind to his looks, he couldn’t have his pick of women.

He ran his hand across his clean shaved head, something he always did when he was nervous or frustrated. “Can we just talk about this calmly?”  

“Rick, just shut up!” I spat. I yanked a neon yellow peplum shirt from the hanger and glared at him. “I may have been stupid for marrying your ass but I ain’t stupid enough to stay in this marriage another day and be played for a fool.”

He had the gall to sigh like I was getting on his nerves. He ran his hand down his clean shaven face. “Just calm down, baby and listen to me.”

I shook my head and laughed even though nothing about this situation was funny. I took a pair of distressed boyfriend dress from their hanger and walked past Rick back into the bathroom. I was so mad, I was shaking. Why wouldn’t he just leave? I couldn’t stand to be in the same house with him. Not after what he’d done to me, to us, to our marriage.  

As if he could read my mind he said, “Charlie, I’m not going anywhere. This is my house too. I pay the bills around here just like you do so you ain’t gonna just put me out.”

My shirt was halfway over my head by the time he finished his sentence and I spun around to face him with one arm in the shirt and one arm halfway through. “Are you serious? You’re really going to make it hard for me like I didn’t just catch you with some hoe last night?”

He had the audacity to nod his bald head at me.

I slowly finished putting my shirt on and then I lunged at him. I was punching, scratching, and screaming as hard as I could. But unlike last night, this time he was able to grab both of my arms and place them over my head. He tossed me on top of the bed where we once made so much love and held me there until it was obvious I couldn’t kick or punch anymore. I sighed in frustration because his strength doubled my own and there was nothing I could do but pant and cry in anger.

“I hate you!” I looked into the eyes of the man I swore my forever to and couldn’t believe he’d brought this much pain to my heart.   

“Charlie, I’m sorry,” he whispered.

I broke into a flood of tears that not even a levy would be able to stop. This was real. This was really happening, and there was nothing I could do to make this any less real, or hurt any less.

Rick attempted to hold my trembling body but I kicked him off of me and screamed for him to leave me the fuck alone. He ran his hands over his chocolate bald head one last time before he walked into his closet, grabbed a few things then walked out of the house.  

I tossed and turned for four nights in a row expecting Darnel to come in the middle of the night and follow through on his threat but by the fifth night, my nerves had settled and I realized he knew staying away from me was the best thing for him. Once the insomnia wore off, the loneliness crept in. But there was not enough loneliness in the world to make me miss Darnel.

I finished my shift at the drugstore and rushed outside to my car. Once I was in my car I took my white pharmacy coat off and threw it in the backseat. I dug in my cream Louis Vuitton Brea bag for my cell phone that had been going off all day. I quickly dialed Charlie’s number when I saw I had six missed calls from her.

“Charlie! What’s going on?”

She sniffled on the other line and my heart sank to the bottom of my feet when she said, “You were right. Rick is cheating on me.”

It took me a second to grasp what she’d said.
I was right?
I felt horrible because even though I’d told her some shit I’d heard, I hadn’t in a million years thought he was actually doing anything wrong.

She laughed but the laugh was bitter. “Yep! I saw the dog ass nigga with my own eyes!”

I gasped. “What do you mean, Charlie?”

“I followed his lying ass to some ghetto ass apartments,” she paused and sniffled. I could tell it was taking everything out of her not to burst into tears. “I mean, the bitch didn’t look like shit, Kesha,” her voice dropped. “She was standing there with my man like…” Charlie stopped like she couldn’t think of a word to describe it. “And when I saw them together, I just lost it. I like, blacked out and some dude was pulling me off them.”

I was glad that I hadn’t started driving out of the CVS parking lot, otherwise, I would have ran into someone’s car. “Pulling you off them?”

“Kesha, girl, I jumped on both of their asses. I don’t know how that even happened. I just wanted to see blood. I didn’t care whose it was.”

All I could do was shake my head. What was Rick thinking? That was the problem, his ass wasn’t thinking. He had everything and here he was throwing it out the window like it was nothing. Niggas! I swear. All I could do was shake my head and wish I could have found the words to comfort Charlie.

“Where is he at now?” I asked.

“Girl, who knows. He just left with a few of his things. I hope he never brings his ass back.”

I knew she didn’t mean that. I mean, this was
Charlie and Rick
. They’d been together for as long as I’d known Charlie. I couldn’t even imagine them
not
being together. “Are you going to work today?” I wanted to change the subject.

“Yeah, I’m about to head out today even though I don’t know how I’m gonna be in the salon all day when my life is falling apart.”

“I’m so sorry this happened, Charlie.”

“Yeah, me too.”  

“Me and Lake will be over there tonight to keep you company.”

She paused and I knew she was trying to think of a way to keep us from coming over but I’d been through my share of breakups and each and every time I needed my girls by my side so there was no way I was going to let her talk me out of it.

She finally sighed and said, “Ok.”

“Alright, girl. And if you need anything today, just call me.”

“Thanks, Kesha.” She hung up and it took me awhile to even digest our conversation. Things were getting so crazy. First, Darnel put his hands on me, Lake had her baby, and now Rick had went out and lost his got-damn mind, cheating on Charlie. The summer was just starting and I could already tell none of our lives would be the same come fall.

I put my Audi A7 in reverse and headed home. I stopped by the Burger King up the street from my condo. After the news I’d just gotten from Charlie, I had to have something greasy and fattening.

After specifically telling them no mustard, add mayo, my damn burger still had nasty ass mustard on it. There was no way I was going to wait in that drive thru line again so I parked my car and headed inside of the fast food restaurant.  

I slapped the burger on the counter, “I said no mustard.”

The teenage cashier quickly apologized and picked up the burger. “I’ll have a new one right out.”

“Well, well, well. I sure hope they get it right this time,” a voice behind me said.

I turned around and was face to face with Officer Moore. He was in uniform but for some reason, he looked more handsome right now than he did in my condo that night. I smiled at him and said, “Was I that mean?”

He laughed and exposed a perfect set of pearly, straight, white teeth. “No, I’m just messing with you.”

I gave him a smile before I turned back to face the counter. I didn’t know what else to say to him. It was obvious that he was feeling me but there was no way in hell I was giving a corny ass cop any play.  

“So, how was your day?”

He wasn’t giving up that easy. “Fine. And yours?” I looked for the Burger King cashier and gave her a look hoping she’d hurry up with my damn burger so I could get the hell out of here.  

He chuckled again making me wonder what in the world was so damn funny. “It’s going.”  

I didn’t like the way he was looking at me so I turned around breaking the eye contact. I didn’t want him to think I was in any way interested in him.  

“But it just got a whole lot better running into you.”

I cringed. I wasn’t in the mood today. I turned around to face him, “Look, Officer…”

“Harris. Call me Harris.”

As if on cue, the cashier came back with my burger. I took it, gave Officer Moore, or Harris, rather, a smile and said, “Well, Harris. It was nice seeing you again.” I headed toward the exit of the fast food restaurant.

“Miss Thomas! Wait a second!” He called after me.

I didn’t want to be rude but I was about to give him a piece of my mind. Wasn’t it obvious that I was in no way interested in him? I had my hand on the exit door but I turned around. I looked him up and down. He was about 5’11 if not 6 foot. He was solid, it was obvious that he worked out, his face was handsome enough, clean shaven, low taper fade, but looks aside, he wasn’t my type.  

“I was hoping we could exchange telephone numbers,” his voice was nervous. His eyes were afraid to make contact with mine. “I would really like to get to know you better.”

“I’m sorry, Harris, I’m really not in the headspace to start dating.” I looked at him. It was like he didn’t remember that he just recently had to report to the scene where my ex-boyfriend had just beat my ass.  

He nodded his head, “Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry. I just thought…”

“I have your card. I’ll give you a call,” I lied.

He looked at me like he knew I was lying and just nodded his head. “Ok, hope to hear from you soon.”

I walked out of the restaurant without saying anything else to him. I jumped on the freeway and headed home. I texted Lake asking if she’d talked to Charlie yet. I didn’t want to be the one to tell her but I did want to make sure she would be able to make it to Charlie’s house tonight.  

I pulled into my condominium parking garage and hopped on the elevator. I was ready to sit on my couch and pig out on this greasy ass food but as soon as I made it to my floor, any appetite I had quickly faded away.  

Darnel was standing outside my door pacing back and forth. I really wasn’t up for this today and on top of everything else I had to deal with, I didn’t have my pistol to stop him this time.

Before I had a chance to pull my cell phone out, he spotted me. My first instinct was to turn around and run. But the sound of the elevator going down proved I was trapped.

“You ain’t so big and bad today, huh?” The look on his face made goosebumps pop up on my arms. What the hell did I ever see in this maniac? I had to wonder why I never noticed the crazed look in his eyes until now.  

“What do you want, Darnel?”

“Bitch, you put a got-damn pistol in my face. You think I’m gon’ let you get away with some shit like that?”

I took two steps backwards. This nigga had lost every piece of his mind.

He charged toward me and I was prepared to fight for my life. Before he could land a finger on me, the neighbor across the hall, Brendon, walked outside. Darnel took me in his arms like he was going to give me a hug instead of a fist to the face. The look on my face must have said everything I didn’t, because Brendon looked from Darnel to me and then asked, “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, potna’. Everything is straight.” Darnel looked him up and down. Brendon had blue eyes and blonde hair, but also the body of someone who lived in the gym, so Darnel knew better than to try anything in front of him.

“Hi, Brendon. How are you doing?” My voice was shaky. “Darnel was just leaving.”

Darnel tightened his grip on me but after seeing that Brenden wasn’t walking away until he left, he released my arm. He looked me dead in my eyes but didn’t say anything. Then he turned around and walked away.

I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until he was gone.

“What was that all about?” Brendon asked once Darnel had gotten on the elevator.  

I rolled my eyes, “That’s my crazy ass ex.”

“Looks like I walked out just in time.”

I sighed and nodded.

Brendon grasped his white trash bag with one hand and ran his other hand through his blonde chin length hair. “Do you want me to stick around and make sure he doesn’t come back?”

I shook my head, “No, but thank you, Brendon. I doubt he’ll come back.” But I wasn’t so sure. I locked the door behind me when I walked inside my condo. I knew it was only a matter of time before Darnel came back around. I knew what had to be done. I was going to have to get a restraining order and I knew exactly who I needed to call to get the ball rolling. I hadn’t planned on ever calling him but after seeing Darnel today, it looked like Officer Harris Moore would hear from me after all.