Heartbeat (9 page)

Amir began tugging at the zipper on the back of my dress.  I lifted up slightly and allowed him to unzip me. I didn’t move as he took the dress off me completely. I laid on his bed wishing there was more light peeking in from his window so he could savor my body. I knew I was sexy whether Rick appreciated it or not. By the way Amir was looking at me, I knew he appreciated it.  

He shook his head, “You’re fine as hell, Charlie.”

I smiled. Compliments always turned me on.  

He began kissing my collarbone and then he went right above my left breast where my heart was beating so hard through my chest. “Does it hurt right here?”

It took a second before I was able to understand what he meant but when I did I nodded my head and whimpered a yes.  

He moved down slightly and in a husky voice said, “Show me where else it hurts.”

My heart had been ripped and shredded. If he planned to kiss my pain away, he’d be kissing my heart all night so I pulled him up where our lips locked again. His lips welcomed me, and then he returned to my neck, then my collarbone, then to my breasts.  I gasped in the pleasure as his kisses left my breasts then went to my navel. I slightly lifted my body up in anticipation of where his lips were going next but instead of going further he came back up to my lips. I didn’t have time to sit in the disappointment because his lips were such perfection on top of mine.  

As we kissed, I felt him reach to the side of me and heard him fiddling inside of the nightstand to my left. I knew exactly what he was reaching for and the expectation of what was about to happen had my heart beating faster than ever. Sweat was forming all over my body. I was a nervous wreck. I tried not to think that I was no better than Rick, as I was here about to commit adultery, just as he had. The thought of it all was sobering me up quicker than I wanted to be. Then all of a sudden, the room started spinning. I shut my eyes to block it out but it was too late. I was already nauseous and pushing Amir off me as I ran to what I assumed to be his bathroom.  

If I would have made it to the toilet three seconds later, I would have vomited all over his black bath mat. How embarrassing was this? I was hovering over his toilet puking up everything in my stomach. Even though I was in my black lacy bra and underwear, I was sure I was anything but sexy at this moment. The room was still spinning and just when I thought I had puked everything left in my stomach, more threatened to come up.  

I didn’t even notice Amir standing behind me until he handed me a cold towel. I couldn’t look him in his face, I was so humiliated. Anything I had planned on doing tonight definitely wasn’t going to happen anymore.  

I sat in the bathroom for what felt like hours. Every now and then, Amir would peek inside of the bathroom and ask how I was doing. I wanted to flush myself down the toilet along with all the stupid alcohol I’d drank.

Finally, my stomach settled and I washed my mouth out with the off brand mouthwash he had on top of his bathroom sink. I walked into his bedroom where he was sleep. I rolled my eyes and cursed under my breath. I had half the nerve to call Kesha and make her come pick me up, but instead I crawled into bed next to this man praying I didn’t wake him. Of course as soon as I got into the bed, his eyes opened.  

“You straight, ma?”

I nodded my head.  

He lifted the cover and I crawled under them. He wrapped his body around mine and dropped the cover on top of us. And all mortification I felt earlier disappeared as soon as he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. I fell asleep thinking this wasn’t so bad after all.

She looked so peaceful while she slept. Not to mention she was so got-damn beautiful. I didn’t want to wake her since she had a rough night last night, so I just kept looking over at her. She had the most beautiful, perfect set of lips I’d ever seen on a woman. I had to force myself out of the bed to keep from kissing them and finishing what we started last night.

I managed to get out of the bed without waking her, so I took a shower expecting for her to be awake by the time I got out. But she was still in my bed sleeping like she hadn’t slept in months.

Everything about this girl was perfect and I knew I was getting myself into a dangerous situation messing with her. I didn’t want to get caught up with no woman, especially not a married woman. She turned over in the bed and the sheet curved to her body. I remembered how sexy she looked last night when I had her almost naked. She was so sexy, she was a ten, and her man was a got-damn fool. I’d had my share of women and broke plenty of hearts, but Charlie was the type of woman you wifed, and never messed around on.

The first night I saw her she was wilding but she was still fine as hell. When I pulled her away from that fight, all I wanted to do was take her home. I never thought I’d see her again but when I found her shoe, I felt like I was on some Cinderella type shit and somehow I just knew we’d run into each other again. So, when I saw her in that salon I knew I had to have her. But I wasn’t supposed to be having anyone. I didn’t come back to Dallas to get involved with a woman. I had one mission, and one mission only, but looking over at my bed with Charlie laying in it, I knew my plans were about to get a lot more complicated.

I wanted to let her sleep but she had a beauty salon to run. That shit was so sexy to me. I’d never messed with a woman of Charlie’s caliber before. She was a business woman and more than likely had more money than me but that didn’t intimidate me; that only made me want her more.

“Rise and grind, mama,” I finally said.

Damn, I hated to wake her up.

When she opened her eyes I could tell it took her a minute or two to remember what all went down last night. I hoped she didn’t regret coming home with me. When she smiled at me, I knew everything was straight. I looked away from her because if I stared in those pretty eyes too long I was going to climb back in that bed.

“Well, good morning to you, too,” she said. She rolled over in the bed. That damned sheet was clinging to her body like it was painted on. I got a good look last night and baby girl’s body was something out of a men’s magazine. Now, I wanted to see it without the lacy bra and panties.

I cleared my throat and thought of basketball, soccer, football, something, anything to prevent my dick from getting hard. I turned and walked in the bathroom to calm my nerves before she could see what she was doing to me.

“How did you sleep?”

“Better than I have in weeks,” She said with a smile that covered her entire face.

I smiled back at her and asked, “You hung over?”

“Ugh! No, thank God.” She placed one of my pillows over her head and laughed. “I am never drinking again!”

I lost count of all the drinks she’d had after the fourth shot and the third lemon martini. “You was hitting it hard last night.” As soon as I said it, I thought about how I wished I could have been doing the same thing to her.

She groaned as she stretched and the sheet fell just below her lacy bra. “Don’t remind me.”

Her breasts were full and if I had to guess, she was a C cup. They sat perky in the black bra. I wasn’t even a breast man but I couldn’t pull my eyes away from them.

She continued, “If I had the slightest inkling that I would end up kissing your toilet most of the night, I would have said no to at least half of the drinks I had last night.”

“Yeah, you was on one.” I started brushing my teeth and when I glanced in my room, she was still lying in my bed, staring at me.

“What time is it?”

“Five minutes to nine.” I finished brushing my teeth and sat at the edge of my bed. I knew she probably had to get to work but I wanted to spend more time with her.

She yawned again. “Damn, I got to be at the shop in less than an hour. Can you drop me off at my house?”

Even though I knew she had to be at the salon, I couldn’t stop my shoulders from dropping in disappointment. I wanted to spend more time with her to see what she was about. I liked that she was a business woman so I had to respect that she was about her business.

“Yeah, I’ll drop you off,” I said even though it was the complete opposite of what I wanted to do. “What time do you think you’ll be outta’ the shop today?” I tried not to sound desperate or overly eager but I had to see this girl again.

She looked like she was running her schedule through her head before saying, “I’ll probably close up around eight, why?”

“Maybe I can pick you up and take you to dinner tonight or something?”

She smiled and it felt like the wind got knocked out of my chest. This woman was gorgeous. Like, the most gorgeous woman I’d ever seen, let alone have in my bed. “Dinner?” She got out of my bed and I turned around instantly to face the wall.

“That sounds good,” she said.

All I wanted to do was turn back around and get another look at her in that sexy ass bra and panties but I wanted to be respectful. Turning around and staring at the white wall instead of her beautiful ass was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life.

“Can you help me with this?” She stood in front of me so I could zip up the back of her dress. I couldn’t help but remember how I was peeling her out of it last night. Damn, here I go again. I was glad she wasn’t facing me so she wouldn’t be able to see how my dick was rising in my basketball shorts.

ESPN, golf, Grandma Betty’s pecan pie
, I had to think about anything other than how soft her skin felt. This girl turned me on like no other chick ever had. I had to stop this shit or she would think I was a straight up creep. After I’d zipped up her dress, she turned around, looked me dead in my eyes and smiled at me like she knew exactly what she was doing. Damn.

“Thank you,” she said. Her voice was low and soft. As soft as her skin. “So dinner tonight?”

I nodded. “What kinda food you like?”

“Everything,” she said with a laugh. “But Mexican and Italian are my favorites.”

I clasped my hands together and stood. “That’s a bet. I know this nice little Mexican joint downtown we can go to.” I walked over to her and lifted her chin with my finger.

When she was looking directly at me I leaned down and kissed her lips. I know the kiss took her by surprise just like she had done me last night. Now she was sober and I wanted to make sure this was what she really wanted.

When she looked up at me, there was no mistaking the smile on her face.

We headed to my car. Once she’d put her seatbelt on I asked, “So, what part of town you stay in?”

“Frisco.”

I should have known. She owned a super successful salon, drove a car that was more than most people’s yearly salary, it was only right that she lived in expensive ass Frisco. “Cool,” I said. I didn’t know why I felt intimidated, but I did. I wanted to ask what her husband did for a living but seeing as though she was through with that nigga, it didn’t matter. Besides, financially, I knew I probably couldn’t compete with that nigga at all. Obviously, Charlie was used to the finer things in life and I wasn’t going to be able to treat her to those things. The move back to Dallas didn’t help my already struggling contractor company. What little clients I did have, I had to leave in Houston when I moved back to Dallas. I shook my head and tried to get my mind off my finances. That shit would have a nigga depressed for the rest of the day. It wasn’t like I didn’t already have enough shit on my plate to be stressed about.

“So, what are your plans for the day?” Charlie asked.

There was no way I could tell her what I was going to be doing today so I lied, “Probably nothing. Just chill with my parents.” It wasn’t a full lie though because more than likely Ma and Pa would be calling any minute now wondering what time I was coming over.

“Aww, you’re close with your parents?”

I nodded. Lord knows I loved Ma to death but I was too close to my daddy to be considered a mama’s boy.

“You have a sister, right? Is she your older sister?”

“Naw. That’s my baby girl, Cher. She’s two years younger than me.” I couldn’t help but smile at the thought of my younger sister. I’d go to war behind that one. I was the reason most of her lil’ boyfriends didn’t stick around for long.

Charlie chuckled. “I’m an only child.” She said it like she’d always hated it. “So, why did you move to Houston?”

“I don’t know,” I shrugged. “I wanted a change of scenery.”

“And now you’re back.”

I couldn’t tell if she was asking me why I came back or not, so I decided not to answer if it was a question. I watched as the surroundings changed as we entered the Frisco area.

I don’t know why I started getting in my feelings as soon as I turned into the subdivision. I knew Charlie had bread, but the neighborhood screamed money. I swallowed a huge lump that had formed in my throat. As I followed the directions she was giving me, the houses seemed to get bigger and bigger and I felt smaller and smaller.

What the hell was I gonna do with a woman like this? Or better yet, what could a woman like Charlie want with a man like me? I wasn’t completely broke but I damn sure wasn’t balling either.

“It’s the last house on the right,” she said.

I nodded and continued down the street. Her house was the biggest one on the block. It looked like a castle. The circular driveway, the stucco tile roof, four car garage and oversized palm trees in the front yard confirmed that I couldn’t afford this chick.

I saw the white BMW in the driveway before she did. She was in the middle of saying something but stopped short and gasped when she saw it. I guess she wasn’t expecting that nigga to be home. Shit, I wasn’t either. When she said she was divorcing him, I figured he’d moved out. Cause I don’t know no divorced people that stay in the same house together. That shit had me feeling like they were on some reconciliation type shit. The anger I felt rising in my chest let me know I should leave Charlie alone now before I got any more in my feelings for her.

She looked at me like she was caught in a lie and I wondered if all that shit she was saying last night was true or not. “I’m sorry, Amir. I had no idea he would be here.”

I shrugged. “It’s cool,” I said although it was anything but.

“I’ll call you tonight, ok?” She said before getting out of my car.

I assumed that meant our dinner date for tonight was off. I wanted to slap my damn self for even thinking about taking this chick out on a date. She was married which meant she was off limits. I didn’t say anything to her, I just watched her walk inside of her big ass house back to her husband.

I drove off but couldn’t help but shake my head. To make matters worse, my cell phone started ringing and I didn’t have to answer it to know it was either Ma or Pa.

“Yo,” I said.

“Yo?” It was Ma. “Is that how you answer the phone now?”

I laughed. No matter what kind of mood I was in, Ma always put a smile on my face. “I’m sorry, Ma. What’s going on?”

“Well, your appointment is at two. Won’t you come over and we all ride to the hospital together?”

I sighed. It didn’t matter how many times I said I wanted to go to the hospital by myself, Ma and Pa would be tagging along. I knew better than to argue with her so I agreed and headed on over to my parents’ house.

No matter how many times I pulled in front of the small one story, off white house I always got a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach. This was the house I was raised in. So much of my life’s memories, good and bad, were wrapped up in this house. No matter how far or how long I tried to stay away, it would always feel like home here.

I parked my car on the curb and walked up the steep driveway. Before I could even pull my keys out of my pocket, Pa was opening the front door. He looked me up and down and shook his head before pulling me in for a hug. I’d been back from Houston for a month now and Pa had hugged me more in this month than he had my entire life. His sudden affection made me uncomfortable.

“Boy, that’s how you going up there to that hospital?” Pa looked me up and down again while shaking his head.

I looked down at my blue and black basketball shorts and Nike slides. “What’s wrong with what I got on?”

“Rosie, will you come look at how this boy is dressed,” Pa said. “And when you gon’ cut that shit off your head?”

All I could do was laugh. Pa had been on my back since I started growing my dreads. I’d had dreadlocks for over twelve years now and Pa still asked me almost every time he saw me when I was going to cut my hair. “Never, Pa, never.”

I walked past him and as soon as I entered the house I could tell Ma was cooking. The strong smell of fried pork chops tickled my nose. I walked straight into the kitchen and kissed Ma on her forehead. “It’s barely nine in the morning and you in here frying pork chops.”

She swatted me with a dishrag and said, “Boy, we eats good round’ here. Ya’ daddy like fried pork chops, eggs, and biscuits for breakfast. Go sit down and I’ll bring you a plate.”

“I thought you cared about my health,” I said as a joke but as soon as I said it, I regretted it because of the look on Ma’s face. “I’m just playing, Ma.” Damn, I couldn’t even crack a joke around here.

I sat on the worn out couch that Ma should have gotten rid of years ago and grabbed the remote. Pa sat across from me staring at me as if I was going to pass out and die at any moment.

“Ya’ll worry too much,” I said.

“Well, what we pose’ to do? This is your life, Amir.” Ma handed Pa a paper plate and several paper towels. She returned to the kitchen and brought me an identical plate. I didn’t really have an appetite but if I didn’t at least attempt to eat something I wouldn’t hear the last of it.

Ma stared at me like she was afraid to say the word but when it finally came out of her mouth it was barely audible, “Cancer.” She shook her head as she sat next to me and I didn’t have to look at her to know tears were already welling in her eyes.