Heller's Punishment (36 page)

“No. I can’t
run out on Trent like that. But I just don’t understand it, Heller.
We care about each other, so why is our relationship so difficult
all the time?”

There was a
long pause, before he quietly responded. “I don’t know, Matilda.
You bring out a lot of emotions in me that I’m not skilled at
managing. I’m used to much less complicated relationships with
women.”

I rubbed my
eyes with a tired hand. “You’re right. I don’t want to do this over
the phone either. It’s too personal for both of us. Let’s talk when
I come home.”

“You’re coming
home?” He sounded tentative, uncharacteristically unsure of himself
as if he’d been genuinely concerned that I wouldn’t return to
him.

“Of course I
am. I told you that I’ll always come back to you, Heller. I just
want some time to think about everything. And also Trent wasn’t
joking when he said he wants me to keep working for him until the
week’s up.”

“Did you really
tell him that you were extremely committed to me?”

“Yes, I did.
And I meant it.”

“Thank you, my
sweet,” he said softly.

We said our
goodbyes and yawning, I settled back under the covers. I’d been
worried that I would toss and turn all night, but as soon as my
head hit the pillow, I fell fast asleep and didn’t wake until
morning.

Trent was a bit
worse for wear the next morning, sitting in his kitchen in just his
pyjama boxers, a cup of strong coffee in front of him. His eyes
were bleary and bloodshot and he sported a shocking case of
bed-hair.

“You look
stunning this morning,” I teased, pouring myself coffee.

“I probably
look as good as I feel,” he groaned. “God, Tilly! I can’t drink
like I used to any more. It’s sad.”

“If it’s any
consolation, I’m feeling quite seedy myself,” I smiled, hoping the
paracetamol I’d just taken would kick in soon. My head was
thumping.

He eyed me
thoughtfully. “You seem calmer today.”

“I had a chat
to Heller late last night. I misunderstood what he said yesterday.
He never meant he wanted me to move out, which is what I thought he
was saying. That’s what I was so upset about.”

Trent’s glance
was sharp. “Wait a minute, Tilly. You
live
with Heller? You
live with your boss? That’s one weird relationship you have going
on with him.”

“I don’t live
with him exactly. I have my own flat. We just live in the same
building. It’s his business and residence combined. He lets me stay
there for free. And it’s not just us living there. There are four
other people who live there too.” I remembered the mysterious
Victor. “Five other people.”

“Oh. But
there’s still the issue of him not wanting you to work for him. I
clearly heard him say that.”

“Yeah, that’s
pretty hurtful. He said he was angry and didn’t mean it, but it’s
made me do some serious thinking. I’m sick of being injured all the
time. You wouldn’t believe what’s happened to me since I started
working for him. Frankly, sometimes I think that I’m lucky I’m
still alive.”

“Well, if
you’re looking for a chance to try out a new career, I was genuine
about my job offer. My researcher is having a baby and going on
parental leave for a year in a week’s time and I still haven’t
found a replacement for her. You’d be perfect, Tilly. Think about
it.”

“Thanks, Trent.
I will,” I smiled. “What would you like me to do for you
today?”

He recited off
a list of chores for me, including sifting through more paperwork
on the lookout for potential stories. I sorted them into three
piles: the
definites
, the
maybe if we’re desperates
,
and the
incredibly disturbings
. Trent came over and flicked
through the definites, and nodded in approval at my choices,
leaving me beaming like a teacher’s pet. It had been a while since
anyone had praised me for my work effort.

The next few
days passed by without incident. Trent decided not to go back to
work for the rest of the week, taking advantage of the fact that
the trial had ended early to reward himself with a few days off. We
worked each morning, but played hooky in the afternoons to do
something fun. We went to the movies one day and for a long bike
ride around the harbour the next day. I was incredibly stiff and
sore, bruised everywhere, but the flat bike path was manageable for
me without too much pain. Later we went to the supermarket to stock
up for dinner, and I waited patiently while he signed autographs
for a couple of over-permed white-haired ladies, who simpered at
him. He flirted outrageously with them, leaving them giggling in
delight. Boldly winking at them, he sauntered away jauntily,
grinning at me.

“You love the
attention, don’t you?” I smiled.

“Maybe,” he
conceded, shrugging with charming sheepishness. “I’d love it more
if it was a group of hot and horny university students though.”

I laughed.
“Dream on, Trent.”

Back in his
office I reminded him that I was going home the next day as my week
with him was finishing up.

“You’re
positive that you’re going back to Heller?” he asked.

“Of
course.”

“Even after
what he said . . .”

“We care about
each other. I belong there with him. It’s the only place in my life
I’ve ever felt as though I belong. I wouldn’t throw that away
easily.”

“You’re very
loyal. I hope he appreciates it,” he said as he flipped through his
diary. “Oh shit! I’d forgotten about that.”

“What?”

“There’s a big
charity event on Wednesday evening. I’ve been ordered to attend by
the network boss. I’d forgotten about it. I haven’t lined up a date
yet.
Damn!
I can’t ask any of my usual lady friends. They’d
be annoyed with me at the late notice, but I can’t go by myself.”
He turned to regard me speculatively. “What are you doing on
Wednesday, Tilly? Are you free?”

“I expect I’ll
be doing nothing. I’m probably going to be unemployed.”

“Come with me
to this event? Please! You can meet all the celebrities,” he
wheedled.

I scrunched my
nose with disinterest, but then had a brilliant idea. “Okay, I’ll
go with you, but only if you return the favour by partnering me to
a wedding next Saturday. I can’t find anyone to take me, because
they all share a passionate hatred of the groom.”

He considered
for a minute and checked his diary, crossing out an entry he’d had
recorded for that Saturday.

“Oh, you’re
busy that day. Never mind.”

“She can wait.
I’d have more fun spending time with you anyway,” he said with a
lovely smile. “And I owe you one.”

We spent our
last evening together drinking wine on the balcony, chatting
casually.

“Do you want me
to pick you up on Wednesday?” he asked as we parted for the
night.

“No. I expect
Heller will want to drop me off here.”

“What? He
drives you to dates?” Trent asked, taken aback.

“Yes. And often
picks me up again afterwards.”

He shook his
head in bafflement. “He keeps tight control over you, doesn’t he?
It’s not normal, Tilly. In fact, I think it’s quite creepy.”

“He just
worries about me. I told you we had a complicated
relationship.”

“You’re not
wrong. Goodnight, Tilly.”

Heller arrived
to pick me up the next morning, an awkward moment for all of us.
Unusually subdued, he still behaved as he would for any client and
enquired politely of Trent whether he’d been satisfied with the
service he’d received from the
Heller’s
staff. Trent,
equally polite, indicated that he had been satisfied, tactfully not
mentioning Beyrer. He went on to give me a particular
recommendation.

“See you
Wednesday, Trent.”

“I’m looking
forward to it.”

“Me too.
Bye.”

And he stayed
at his front door until the lift doors closed on us.

Chapter
24

In the lift,
keeping his features and voice neutral, Heller asked, “Do you have
a date with him on Wednesday?”

“I’m doing him
a favour. He needed a partner to a charity event. And he’s doing me
one in return by accompanying me to Will’s wedding,” I replied
coolly, staring straight ahead.

The atmosphere
between us was strained on the journey back to the Warehouse. He
remained silent, despite throwing me a couple of meaningful
glances. I knew he was relying on me to break the ice, but I
struggled to find the right tone and the right words. In the end,
he did it simply with heartfelt sincerity.

“I’m so sorry,
my sweet.”

“I know.” I
reached over to grasp his hand, offering him a rueful smile.

Later that
evening in the hot tub, we tentatively began discussing our
‘relationship’. We both agreed that we cared for each other, and
neither of us wished to step backwards from what we shared. But
equally neither of us had a clue about whether we should, or even
could, progress it further.

I confessed to
myself that my feelings for him were growing stronger all the time,
but there wasn’t any chance of becoming seriously involved with him
while he still shagged every woman he could get his hands on. He’d
already admitted that I aroused emotions in him that he found
unfamiliar and difficult to manage.

Once again, we
were at an impasse.

“All I know is
that I need you to be here with me and I don’t want a life without
you any more. But when I think about how many times I’ve almost
lost you since you started working for me I become . . . stressed.
And then I react badly when you become entangled in another
dangerous situation. That’s why I always seem to be so angry with
you,” he explained.

“I don’t mean
to make you angry,” I said apologetically.

“And I don’t
mean to always say the wrong thing.” He held out his arms. “Come
here.”

I slid across
the hot tub and plonked myself on his lap, wrapping my arms around
his shoulders. He reached up to kiss me and that’s all we did for
the next ten minutes – deep, slow kissing. He was talented and
demanding, not rushing, allowing us to fully appreciate each
other’s lips and tongues. Intensely sensuous, it left us both
breathless.

“Does that make
up a little for the shower?” he asked, his voice husky with
desire.

“Mmm,” I
purred, melting against him.

He stroked my
back caressingly. “I love it when you’re like this.”

“Like what?” I
asked, nuzzling his neck with my lips.

“Soft and warm
and loving. It stirs up all sorts of sensations in me, externally
and internally.” He wasn’t lying about his external stirrings –
sitting on his lap in only a bikini, it was rigid against me.

I would have
been happy to stay like that all night, but of course he had to
ruin it.

“I’m going to
have to discipline you, Matilda.”

I giggled.
“Ooh, kinky! But don’t you think we should have some vanilla sex
first before we try the more adventurous stuff?”

He smiled. “Not
that kind of discipline. Although now that you mention it . . . I
might dig up that pair of handcuffs I own. That would stop you
running away from me at least.” He stopped for a brief kiss break.
“No, I meant doling out a punishment for what happened between you
and Beyrer.”

I sat up
indignantly. “I didn’t do anything wrong. Why would you punish
me?”

“The bad
publicity is hitting me hard. I’ve had five cancelled assignments
and we’re not getting any new jobs in at all at the moment. I know
it doesn’t seem fair to you, but I have to maintain discipline in
my business and in my staff. Everyone needs to be reminded that I
am the boss and I won’t tolerate any behaviour that’s going to
impact on my business. And unfortunately, your behaviour on that
assignment, whether commendable or not, has impacted in a negative
way on my business.”

“It’s not fair!
I didn’t do anything wrong,” I protested, scrambling to move off
his lap. I no longer felt soft and warm and loving. But he held me
in place with an iron grip.

“I need to be
able to assure my clients that the staff members involved in that
incident have been either dismissed or disciplined. I don’t know
what else I can do to counteract the negative publicity.”

Although hugely
sulky with him, something Trent had said popped into my mind. “I
know something that might help. Don’t reject it immediately. Have a
think about it first. Trent wants to do a story on your business.
He’s interested in exploring the work we do. If I asked him nicely
it could be a puff piece, which would be good for business.”

He thought
about it for a while. “My first instinct is to say no, but I can
see the benefits in doing a story with him. It makes good business
sense, as long as it’s a positive story. I’ll think about it
tonight.”

“Okay.” I
studied his face, eyes full of misery. “How are you going to punish
me?”

He sighed.
“Don’t look at me like that, my sweet. I don’t
want
to
punish you. I’ll have to think of something that sends a message,
but isn’t too painful for you.”

“I want you to
suspend me for a year.”

“What?” he
exclaimed in surprise.

“That could be
my punishment. Trent’s offered me a job for twelve months,
replacing his researcher while she’s having a baby. I really want
to do it.”

“But what about
your job with me?” He sounded wounded.

“I need a break
from it, Heller. I’m aching everywhere. I have bruises all over me
and I’d only barely recovered from the last batch of bruises I
received. I’ve been through a lot since I started working for you
and I want to do something that doesn’t involve me almost dying
every time I step out the door.”

“You’d work for
him, but still live with us. And you’d return to working for me at
the end of the year?”