Her Forbidden Rockstar: A Forbidden Rockers Novel (5 page)

The security guard motioned them to enter through the open door, but didn’t move from his spot. Jackie and Aralia rushed in excitedly with Caroline lagging behind slowly, trying to stay in the background. They walked into a room that seemed larger than her entire apartment. There were multiple lounging sections with groupings of chairs and couches, as well as a fully stocked bar toward the back, a mini stage to one side with musical equipment piled up, and a curtained off corner hidden by a thick velvet curtain.

There were several people in the room, mostly drinking and partaking in other activities you might expect to find back stage at a rock concert. Logan was nowhere in sight, which Jackie and Aralia didn’t seem to notice as they were already at the bar, making drinks and talking to several handsome men who looked like they were either musicians or roadies.

Caroline walked further into the room awkwardly, putting her focus on some intriguing art pinned to the wall. The room was a bit loud, but she tuned it out and tried to breathe out her anxiety. She glanced toward the farther side of the room, seeing that Aralia and Jackie were already settled on different couches with groups of men and more models.

They were laughing and obviously enjoying themselves. She smiled for them, but that wasn’t her type of fun. She wasn’t interested in being surrounded by people most likely impaired from multiple substances. She turned back to look at the next painting on the wall, an abstract piece with swirls of colors, seeming to go in a certain pattern she couldn’t quite figure out.

“It’s cute that your face scrunches up like that every time you don’t understand something,” a deep and familiar voice spoke behind her. She jumped, startled, whirling around to see Logan standing less than a few inches from her.

“I didn’t get to see a lot of that at the coffee shop.” He smirked at her, continuing to tease her about being a know-it-all. Her cheeks blushed a dark red and she looked away from him, feeling embarrassed that he had caught her in a private moment.

“I didn’t see you there. And I have no idea what you are talking about,” she stammered, sticking her nose up in an attempt to look confident, but mentally kicking herself for being so ineloquent.

He just smiled at her, showing off small dimples on his cheeks that she felt the urge to reach out and touch. He was so unbelievably handsome this close. She inhaled the musky, yet fresh, scent he exuded and felt his hot breath tickle her cheeks. A silence came over the two of them for what seemed like an eternity, but was really only a few seconds at most. He seemed completely at ease, which only made her more nervous. She could see herself fidgeting more and more by the second.

Although Logan was already only a few inches away from her, he began to lean down a little further, closing the gap between them even more.  Caroline’s breath caught in her throat. She wouldn’t have been capable of breathing if she tried, because she was completely entranced in his sparkling blue eyes. She was caught in the magnetic field between them, pulling them closer together.

“So, you like that painting?” Logan grinned, interrupting her fantasy moment and causing her to step back and clear her throat.

She blinked a few times, trying to gather herself, and then looked back at the painting. He smiled coyly at her, seemingly knowing the effect he was having on her and definitely enjoying it. That just made her angry, which may not seem like the normal reaction in this type of situation, but Caroline was always in control. She didn’t lose herself in the moment like this.

At the Java Jolt when she met Logan, she was calm and collected and hadn’t even given him the slightest opportunity to ruffle her feathers. Now here he was playing her like a fiddle! She knew he didn’t really care about her, not with all those models prancing around and throwing themselves at him. How dare he try to gain the upper hand by throwing her off balance with those steamy eyes and those tiny, perfect dimples? She mentally slapped herself and snapped back to reality.

“Yeah, it’s okay,” Caroline said, trying her best to sound nonchalant.

He just smiled again with that irritating and boyish grin, like he could read her thoughts and knew he had just knocked some of her walls down. Her blood boiled the more that she thought about it. How dare he act so full of himself! He was just another musician, nothing original or unique about him.

Just an overly confident man surrounded by fawning women plucking away at his guitar strings, how unoriginal he was
, she thought to herself.

“Come with me,” Logan spoke softly to her, his hand capturing her elbow and pulling her toward the draped off section of the room.

“Where are you taking me? What’s behind there?” Caroline panicked slightly, pulling her arm free from him. She kept trying to withstand his delicious magnetism, but losing ground by the second. He turned back to her and smiled, rolling his eyes at her mock outrage.

“If you want to know, you better come find out.” He annoyingly avoided her question entirely as he disappeared between the folds of the velvet curtains.

She watched him enter, then turned to look at the rest of the room. No one was even remotely paying attention to them. Jackie was kissing a different security guard in the corner of the room and Aralia was talking animatedly, while a group of people sat around her, captivated. Aralia had always been a star and there was nothing that could drag her away from an audience.

Caroline turned back toward the curtain and took a deep breath, stepped forward, and pulled them apart to walk through. The curtains quickly fell closed behind her, leaving her in a smaller room, maybe only twice the size of her bedroom or a little less. There was a bed to one side with a large counter on the adjacent wall with all kinds of products, clothes, and travel items strewn across it. The other side of the room is where Logan stood, facing away from her. He had taken his shirt off and was only wearing baggy sweat pants.

She paused, taken aback for a moment, by the site of the clearly defined muscles on his back, followed by his bulging shoulders and bulky biceps, all covered in different tattoos that told a story she so badly wanted to read. Caroline was so distracted by him that she hadn’t noticed what he was doing until he turned around to look at her.

“What do you think?” he asked, his eyes showing a slight vulnerability as he awaited her judgment.

Logan was standing in front of an easel with a partially painted canvas on it. The scene was of a girl’s profile, looking behind her. The girl looked sad, but confident. There was something in her eyes that made Caroline lock in. She walked further into the room to look at the painting more in depth, forgetting Logan was standing there and now even closer to her. The girl had brown curly hair, pale white skin, and rosy lips. Her neck and the rest were still not drawn, only her face and the beginning edges of her hair were completed.

It was probably one of the most beautiful paintings that she had ever seen. It looked so real, like the girl was going to turn back around and look right at her. Not only did the painting look real, but it was overflowing with emotions and meaning. It wasn’t just a picture on a canvas, it told a story in her gaze, in the soft light around her face, and the hazel complexity of her eyes.

“It’s beautiful,” Caroline whispered, hauntingly. There was really nothing more that she could say that would accurately capture what she was looking at. She had now entirely forgotten that Logan was standing by her side, until his hand came around and sat lightly on the dip in her lower back. Her breath staggered for a second and she cleared her throat, turning back to look at him.

“Who painted this?” she asked him.

“It’s not fully painted yet, but once I finish it, you can have it,” he replied, gazing into her eyes seriously.

“I meant who painted it,” Caroline started, then stopped and realized what he had just said, “wait, you painted this?”

“Don’t look so surprised.” He was smiling at her again,

“I am more than a guy holding a microphone every night.” He turned from her to look back at the painting. “Plus, I had a wonderful muse that pulled this out of me.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” she said curtly, not meaning to sound annoyed, even though she was. She looked at the painting, feeling jealous of the girl that he had painted. She knew she was being ridiculous.

Logan turned back to look at her, a confused look on his face. He seemed to have a realization just then and smiled widely at her, laughter dancing in his eyes. He took another step closer to her, this time completely closing the gap. His arms encircled her waist and he pulled her to his bare chest, pressing her tightly to him. Caroline lost every ability to breath or even to think. Her legs had gone limp, which made her thankful that he was holding most of her weight.

“Caroline, I painted you. You are the most beautiful muse there ever could be. Your button nose, pretty lips, and shiny hazel eyes,” his deep voice became softer as he whispered to her, repeating some of the lyrics that she had just heard on stage, looking deeply into her eyes.

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing, but everything had gone still. She felt at home. She felt like she had been in his arms her entire life, or that her life hadn’t even started until just then. The nerves and butterflies had fluttered away and she was overwhelmed with a calm sensation of belonging that she had never felt before.

“Logan,” she breathed his name, trying to say something, but the words wouldn’t come.

“This painting is you. My final song was you. You have been my every waking thought since we met. I can’t sleep. I can’t focus. I can’t do anything, but think about you,” Logan continued, his face coming even closer to hers.

“Caroline…” Logan exhaled her name, leaning forward.

His forehead met with hers, as they looked down at each others’ lips. Both of their breathing was slightly ragged as his arms tightened around her. Her hands were on his chest, trying to keep some barrier between them. Her defenses were quickly melting away. He moved closer and she felt his lips brush against hers. It wasn’t a kiss, just a caress, but the sensation was like lightning, deliciously attacking her entire body.

“Caroline, I’ve never felt this way before. Tell me you feel this.” He was almost begging, yet somehow commanding at the same time. His lips brushed hers again, refusing to actually commit until she allowed him, until she told him that she felt it too. Her eyes were closed, her body was flush against his.

“Yes.” She was barely able to utter the word as she leaned further into him, willing his lips to finally meet hers. She was on fire and only his lips could cool her. But he didn’t move closer, he pulled further away.

“Caroline, I have to tell you-“ Logan started to say, still holding her and looking deeply into her eyes. He looked worried, an expression that she had never seen on him before. It quickly grounded her and brought her out of her hazy, lust-filled moment with him.

“What’s wrong?” she asked him, pulling back enough that his arms dropped to her hips, instead of around her back. Just as she was pulling back, a high pitched woman’s voice rang out from the other side of the curtain.

“LOGAN!”

He jumped back from Caroline hurriedly, letting go of her completely. She felt like someone had just ripped a bandage off of her with no warning, almost as if it was physically painful to not have his arms around her. He turned and walked toward the part in the curtains just as a tall woman with black hair, tied firmly into a bun, marched into the room.

Her face was pulled tight with irritation and her frail frame was held together by a tightly wrapped dress and way too high heels. Her eyes were a deep green, which was probably the most appealing thing about her. They drew you in and made you look past the snarl that seemed to permanently belong on her lips.

“Logan, you are late! You need to be finishing sound check for tomorrow’s show. Then you need to rest, so you will be able to perform!” She walked straight up to him and kissed him squarely on the mouth.

“Come on, babe. Let’s move it,” she commanded, pointing to the curtain. Finally, she seemed to notice Caroline standing in the back of the room. The mystery woman’s eyes narrowed as they appraised her.

“Oh, hello there. Didn’t know Logan had company.” She turned to Logan with an angry look before gesturing to Caroline. “Care to explain?”

“Gina, this is Caroline. Caroline, this is my girlfriend, Gina. Caroline was just looking at this painting. She is considering buying it when I’m done,” Logan flubbed through an explanation but Caroline hadn’t heard anything past the introduction of his “girlfriend”.

That sentence and the moment that they had just shared did not mix in her mind. She couldn’t understand what was going on. Logan was still talking to Gina, but it was all a fog to her. Caroline stood there, getting angrier by the moment, realizing she had been very close to kissing a man who was involved with another woman. Logan said something to her, but she didn’t hear him. He and Gina walked through the curtain and left her standing alone in the small room.

She looked back at the painting of her and a flash of fury jolted through her. With one swipe of her arm, she knocked the entire easel over and the painting lay face down on the floor. Feeling satisfied by the action, Caroline took a deep breath and mentally slapped herself for what seemed like the millionth time that day.

She can’t believe she had let herself get carried away like that. Twice!

He was a musician, a rock star, a man surrounded by groupies. Of course he would be the player type too. Of course he would have a girlfriend. Caroline felt so stupid as she headed to leave, pausing right before the curtains, she saw Logan’s shirt draped over a chair arm.

Her anger seemed to immediately dissipate and replaced with a sudden feeling of sadness. She didn’t know why she was doing it, but she grabbed his shirt and stuffed it into her purse. She then continued to storm out and go find Jackie and Aralia. They were still on the other side of the room when Caroline walked over to them angrily, Logan was nowhere in sight.