Her Forbidden Rockstar: A Forbidden Rockers Novel (7 page)

“You drew these?” he asked inquisitively, pointing to the picture she had sketched earlier of the older woman. She blushed, she didn’t usually show her sketches to anyone.

“Yes, I drew that this morning. Do you have a habit of rifling through people’s things?” she questioned him indignantly. She reached out her hand, insisting he hand it back to her. He complied and passed it to her, smiling widely.

“I don’t think you are in a position to talk about touching other people’s things.” Logan laughed and pointed at his shirt that she was still wearing. She bit her lip and grinned. Caroline squeezing the sketch pad in her hands, he had her there.

“What do you want, Logan? Why are you here?” Caroline asked him again, looking up cautiously at him with her chin dipped down.  Logan took a step toward her, causing her to straighten up and look him square in the face. He stopped and stared at her for a moment, trying to collect his thoughts.

“I didn’t mean for last night to end the way it did. I want to explain,” he started.

“There is no need to explain anything to me. You have a girlfriend. Gina seems lovely. I hope you two are very happy together,” Caroline said, rolling her eyes at him. She was trying to be the bigger person, but she definitely sounded sarcastic. Okay, so she wasn’t trying all that hard to be the bigger person.

“No, Caroline. That’s not… look, I know it didn’t go well. But, Gina and I have been over for years. We barely tolerate being around each other. At least, I can barely tolerate being around her. She is not the woman for me,” Logan told her.

“If you two are over, why did you call her your girlfriend? I saw you kiss her, for God’s sake. I mean, it’s one thing to have embarrassed me like that last night, but then you come here and lie to me? Wow, so is this what you like to do? Use people and toss them aside? I think it’s time for you to leave now,” Caroline huffed angrily, pointing toward her front door.

Logan didn’t move.

“Caroline, she is my manager. She controls pretty much everything about my life. I can’t just break up with her without losing a shit ton of money. Plus, she is a vengeful person. She would destroy me. With all of her music business connections and her family, she would take me from A-Lister to someone who can’t even get a show in Las Vegas. It’s just complicated, but I don’t love her. It’s become just business.” Logan tried to sound convincing.

He knew that this wasn’t going over well. There was really no way to explain who Gina was to him and everything she had meant for his life, but meeting Caroline had changed his life. Something about her smile and even her squinting, angry eyes were so alluring to him. She frustrated him to no end, but he saw past that wall she put up, to the tender and vulnerable girl behind. She was so beautiful, intoxicating, and he knew he couldn’t let her fall through his hands.

“Why would you ever be with someone like that in the first place then?” Her face scrunched up in confusion.

“It’s complicated. She was there for me when no one else was. She took care of my family when we needed it the most. I feel like I owe her, and there’s no way I can ever repay what she did.” He sighed and rubbed a hand on the back of his neck before repeating himself. “It’s just... complicated.”

“I don’t need the details, Logan. She is your girlfriend, nothing else matters to me. I am not that kind of girl. Just go.” Caroline walked to the front door and opened it for him.

“Caroline, I know you are not.” Logan began to sound like he was begging.

He walked toward her and grabbed her waist, pulling her toward him. She let go of the door and allowed him to press her body against his firm chest. She was trying to stay angry, but his skin was pulsing heat against her. All she could think of was how intoxicating he smelled, a mixture of shower gel and paint. Odd, but delicious, and it was making her head spin. Her knees went weak and she leaned into him.

“Caroline, you did something to me. When I met you that morning in the coffee shop, something changed in me. I hadn’t realized how unhappy I was, with Gina or with my life entirely, until I looked into your eyes and saw what happiness could be.

The rest of the week, you were all I thought about. Every day, all I could think of was how I want to be waking up next to you, not Gina. She and I fight nonstop. She acts like I have to wait on her every need and do everything that she says. I’m not her boyfriend, I’m her hostage.”

Caroline gave him a skeptical look, but he continued.

“I can’t break up with her, because she will ruin my career and she has done so much for me and my family in the past. She has threatened to multiple times. I don’t know what to do. I had just given up and accepted that that was my life. Then, you walked into that coffee shop and shoved all my papers to the side, along with the rest of my life!” Logan exhaled, caressing the side of her face with his fingers.

Caroline smiled as she remembered the first time that they met. She felt so warm and perfect in his arms right then, as if they had been made just for her. She looked up into his eyes, those deep, blue eyes that she just gets lost in.

“I can’t accept that that is my life anymore. I don’t want to go through each day dreading coming home, dreading seeing Gina. I don’t want to lose you, I can’t. I know I screwed up last night, I am such a jerk. I had no idea what I was doing and I just panicked. Please give me another chance, Caroline,” Logan begged softly, touching his forehead to hers. Her breathing became shallow, as she felt him holding his breath, waiting for her answer.

“Logan,” Caroline whispered, almost in a whine.

“Don’t do this to me. You have a girlfriend. I can’t be the other woman.” She looked down at his full and perfect lips, then up into his eyes. “I don’t’ want to be with you.”

“You don’t mean that. Caroline, you know there is something here. I can see it in those beautiful hazel eyes. Caroline, your eyes are breathtaking,” he whispered, pulling her closer to him, kissing her cheek softly.

His arms wrapped tighter around her waist, moving his lips from her cheek to her mouth and pressing his lips against hers. She didn’t even bother trying to stop him, she wanted it as much as he did. Her mind went completely blank, as her hands came up and locked behind his neck. Their lips refused to part as they fell deeper and deeper into their kiss, losing track of everything around them.

Every reason to say no was gone and all that was left was the undeniable chemistry between them.  Logan lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he carried her into the bedroom. He gently dropped her on the bed and climbed on top of her. Caroline stared into his now smoldering dark, blue eyes and shivered with intrigue and excitement. He leaned down and kissed her again, hips pressed together and arms wrapped around one another.

RING RING! RING RING!

Caroline jumped as the phone rang, startling her. They both looked toward the phone on her nightstand and back at one another. He smiled at her and kissed her again, they silently agreed to ignore the phone since this moment was too important to let pass. Caroline smiled in their kiss and ran her fingers through his wavy hair. The phone continued to ring for another minute until it switched over to voicemail with a few clicking sounds.

Caroline’s voice came on the machine with her regular greeting telling people to leave a message at the beep. She couldn’t help but blush when she heard herself. She always thought she sounded like a little girl on the phone. She hoped Logan wasn’t listening to it, but she doubted he was, since she could physically feel how distracted he was against her. The answering machine finally came to an end, beeping, and Aralia’s voice rang out through the speakers.

“
Caroline! Get your ass out of bed. I know you are probably moping, because of that jackass, Logan. We need to go out tonight and get drunk, hit on hot guys, and forget all about that jerk. You don’t need him. I mean, what kind of asshole hits on you when he has a girlfriend? You are way too good for that guy! Anyhow, girlie, give me a call back soon. I want to be grinding up against strangers tonight!”

The message ended and the room fell silent. The duo were staring into each others eyes after listening to the message, neither moving nor knowing what to do. Finally, Logan got up and swung his feet off the bed. Caroline sat up behind him and pulled her knees up to her chest. The two were silent. Logan dropped his head, shaking it, and sighing.

“I’m sorry, Car.” Logan pushed his hair out of his face, raking his hand through his locks. He turned his head to look at her sitting behind him with her chin on her knees.

“You deserve better than this.  You deserve better than me. I shouldn’t be here,” he moaned, almost as if he was in pain. His face was strained and clearly miserable. Caroline nodded in agreement, not really meaning it.

“Logan, she is right. I don’t want to be the other woman. We shouldn’t have even done what we just did. You have a girlfriend. Gina.” Caroline shook her head, but Logan twisted his waist around and leaned back on the bed, laying his arm across her legs. His face close to hers, carefully looking into her eyes, searching for the truth. He wasn’t even sure what he wanted to see or what he wanted either.

“Caroline, I want to be with you. I know that you want to be with me, too,” he whispered to her while his other hand brushed a few pieces of stray hair off her face.

“Are you going to break up with Gina?” Caroline asked, looking up into his eyes. Her eyes were begging him to say yes, just waiting to hear it come out of his mouth. That he would pick her. That she meant that much to him. He was silent for a moment and his hand dropped from her face.

“I can’t,” he said simply, hanging his head, feeling ashamed. Caroline felt tears welling up in her eyes and a knot building in her chest. Her body went numb and she began to shake, she wasn’t sure if it was because she was about to cry or if she was furious at his response.

“Get out,” she spoke softly, trying to hide the shaking in her voice. Her knees were pulled tighter against her chest and pressed her eyes on them, hiding her tears from view.

Logan squeezed her leg softly, kissed her forehead, then stood up. He adjusted his shirt and walked toward her bedroom door. He paused in the doorway and looked back at her. She refused to look up at him.

“Caroline, please. Don’t throw us away. You know there is something here. I’m sorry that I can’t explain better,” Logan said softly, his hand against the door post.

She didn’t respond. She knew if she opened her mouth, she would start crying. Instead, she sat there looking down at her feet, concentrating very hard on keeping the tears hidden from him. She didn’t want to show him the effect he had on her. Logan stood there for another moment, but realized he wasn’t going to hear what he wanted form her. He hung his head and shook it, glancing at her one more time and then walking out. A few moments later, Caroline heard the front door open and close. She stopped holding her breath and let the tears drip down her cheeks.

She sobbed until she could finally get her breathing back under control. She laid back in bed, stretching herself out, and staring up at the ceiling. She couldn’t cry anymore, there was nothing left in her. Breathing deeply, she allowed herself to just lay there quietly, soothing herself in silence. Her thoughts were far from quiet as she tried to wrap her mind around the last hour of activities. Logan Clay had just been in her apartment. One of the most famous rock stars of her generation had not only been standing in her living room, but had pretty much confessed his love for her.

Okay, she knew she was getting ahead of herself. He didn’t say he loved her, but it felt that way. He had kissed her. Logan Clay had just been in her bed! Kissing her! She felt like she had just woken up from a dream, maybe it never actually happened. It just was so unbelievable.

Caroline was nothing special, at least that is what she always told herself. She wasn’t a celebrity. She had never met a celebrity before Logan. Her family was rich, but she lived a pretty average life. Despite all that, she had just been kissing one of Hollywood’s most famous bachelors. Sighing, she rolled off the bed and sat on the edge. Grabbing her phone off the bedside table, she dialed Aralia’s number. The moment Aralia answered the phone, Caroline chimed in without giving her a chance to talk.

“Aralia, we are going out. Put on your glitter stilettos, because this is going to be an insane night we will never remember,” Caroline’s tone was serious, but she chuckled as she hung up the phone, still not letting Aralia talk.

She immediately walked over to her closet and started pulling things out, tossing them on the bed. It was a Sunday, but she didn’t care. Tonight was going to be a party night. It was early afternoon at this point, but she knew of several good weekend happy hours to get the evening started.

After a few more minutes, Caroline found an assortment of clothes that she liked. She had picked out a short silver skirt that hit her mid-thigh and showed off a lot of leg. Her top was sheer and a light pink color, that was light and flowing. A tighter camisole underneath showed off her curves under the sheer top. Her hair was freshly washed, blown into soft curls down her shoulders. Her shoes were pink stilettos that gave her an extra five inches and lifted her in all the right places.

Caroline gave herself the once over in the floor length mirror in her bathroom, twirling around. Smiling, she was pleased with herself, even brazenly thinking that Logan was really missing out tonight. Her emotions were continuously bouncing between being angry at him to missing him, wishing her fantasy could come true. Caroline sighed at herself in the mirror, tossed her hair over her shoulder, and walked out of the bathroom.

Logan is not crossing my mind again tonight
. She made a vow to herself.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Caroline opened her eyes, trying to figure out what the sharp, piercing sound was. She was staring at her bedroom ceiling and turned her head to the side to look at the clock. She grimaced as she realized her head was pounding. The simple motion of turning her head felt like marbles were rattling around her skull. She squinted at the clock until it finally came into focus. When it did, her eyes flew open and she jumped straight out of bed.