He's Captured My Soul (Captured Series Book 3) (40 page)

IT’S DAY TWO AFTER COMING
home alone, and the only time I’ve moved from the couch is to go to the toilet. My family has been here constantly, but I’m not ready to move on yet, I don't want to. Because the minute I do, it means the last few months have all been worthless. I sent them all away a few hours ago. There’s nothing any of them can do.

Well there is one thing my dad is managing to do and do really well. So far he’s managed to keep the story from the media, and for that I’m grateful. But I know it’s only a matter of time, before I need to release a press statement.

My mother called the doctor out. I think she had hoped the doctor would give me something to help me sleep. But with the babies, the doctor was reluctant to give me any medication. He left saying he would call on me again in a few days, but if anything else changed to contact him straight away.

Ethan was here with Lucy, but didn’t stay very long. I managed to put on a face, if only for Lucy’s benefit. I asked Ethan where was Sophie, and he told me she couldn’t face me yet. That’s understandable, but I don’t want her to be a stranger with me. I miss her smiley face and her friendship.

Joan is trying to ensure I eat at the request of the doctor. He did say if I didn’t start eating soon, I would need to go into the hospital. So for that reason alone, I’m trying to do the right thing for my babies. I’ve managed to eat some of Joan’s homemade soup, but that’s all. Murphy hasn’t been around much the last few days, I expect he must be busy with Michael and Alex. Michael is going between the casino and the club and also trying to coordinate the building work for what is meant to be my home at the hotel.

I hear the intercom buzz, but I don’t bother getting up. I don’t want to see anyone else. I stay on the couch pulling the cover around me.

“Thanks, Joan,” Kirsty calls. Shit, I didn’t expect her, she’s meant to be working. “Has she even moved today?”

“Briefly, Kirsty,” Joan tells her as both woman hover around the living room.

“Right you, Time to get up,” Kirsty says pulling the cover from me. “When was the last time you washed?”

“Kirsty, I appreciate your concern, but I want to be left alone. So why don’t you go away.”

“You, lady.” Kirsty’s voice is raised, telling me she’s not going anywhere. “You are going for a shower, even if I have to come in with you and bloody wash you. Now that hair needs to be sorted, it’s matted. It really isn’t a good look you’ve got going on just now. Please let me get you cleaned up?” I nod, because I know she won’t give up on me. “Joan, can you rustle up something, fattening, comfort food, to eat?”

“Of course I can.” Joan smiles, before scurrying away into the kitchen.

Kirsty helps me up from the couch, but I fall back down on it. I’m too weak. “You stupid, stupid girl. It’s not just you this is affecting. Time to get your act together.”

I try again, this time Kirsty keeps hold of me and we walk at a snail’s pace up the stairs. I bet she’s now wishing she hadn’t bothered because of how long it takes us to get to my bedroom. She leaves me standing in the room as she goes and starts running the shower. I suppose deep down it was bound to happen sooner or later, Kirsty basically kicking my ass.

“Right strip and in that shower.”

“Okay.” Everything is done in slow motion. She helps me get out my clothes and keeps hold of my hand as I step in the shower.

“I’m staying in here. I want to make sure you wash.”

“I will. I promise. You can wait in the bedroom.”

“Nope, because if you don’t do your hair, I will join you and bloody wash it. Now move it, because after we’ve had something to eat I’m taking you out.”

“You know I’m sure there is someone who would pay good money to see me and you in a shower together,” I say with a slow smile.

“There’s my girl. Will you be alright? I need to make a phone call,” she says. I tell her I will.

I wash my hair first and leave the conditioner in while I wash the rest of me. Kirsty was right, my hair is a big mass of knots. The shower is refreshing, not as hot as I would usually take, and even the babies seem to agree, as I feel them moving.

Kirsty acknowledges the fact I’ve washed my hair, when she enters the bathroom. I try not to think about the fact she wants to take me out, as I finish up in the shower. She hands me a towel and I wrap it around me. She has a smaller one in her hand and starts to dry off my hair. Alex would have done the same thing for me. No, I need to lose that thought. I can’t think about him today, because I don’t want to cry again.

We go into the bedroom, and Kirsty starts to dry and style my hair. I use the word style loosely, because, it seems as lifeless as me at the moment. As soon as my hair is done, she puts my face cream on me, then it’s my body lotion. So she really does mean business today. She rummages around my wardrobe pulling out clothes, but all the ones she picks no longer fit because of my growing bump. I take a pair of leggings and a shirt.

“They’ll do I suppose and a pair of flat shoes. You have enough problems today, just trying to walk, never mind in anything with a heel.”

I laugh for the first time in who knows how long. I know it’s not really that funny.

“Now that you are clean, I can sit in your company.” Bold and straight to the point as always is our Kirsty. “Let’s see what Joan has made to eat, because I for one am starving. I worked through my lunch so I could get away a bit earlier. Now I’m glad I did.”

Joan has the table set in the kitchen. She smiles as I sit down. I guess I look much better than I have done the last few days. Joan has made macaroni and cheese and chips along with garlic bread; well Kirsty’s only request was fattening.

“Libby, what can I get you to drink?”

“Milk please.”

“Kirsty?”

“I’ll have milk as well. Thank you.”

Kirsty and I eat in silence. I can see Joan watching me. I can only surmise she is glad to see me finally eating something a bit more substantial. I’m sure she will get Murphy to report back to my parents.

“So where is it we’re going?” I ask Kirsty.

“I’ve made an appointment at a hairdresser’s, around the corner. Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” I can hear the sarcasm in my own voice.

“Like I’m the bad guy. Even with it washed, it still needs a cut, but that’s no surprise. You’ve been a little pre-occupied recently with one thing or another. I know it’s not your usual hairdresser, but they do have a good reputation and it’s only a short walk. Some fresh air will do you good.” I stare at her and nod. “And if this was me, you would do the same, and you know you would. So get eating a bit more then we can go.”

She is right, of course I would do the same for her she’s my best friend, and there’s nothing we both wouldn’t do for the other.

The walk to the hairdressers isn’t too bad, although my pace is a lot slower. Kirsty doesn’t try to rush me or complain.

“So Elizabeth, what are you getting done?” Kirsty asks when I’m seated in the chair.

“I don’t know, think I may go a little shorter.”

“If you’re being daring, how about a few lighter highlights as well.”

“Go for it.”

I tell the stylist what I’m looking for lengthwise and let her do what she wants with the colour. She tells me nothing too dramatic, a few highlights, just like Kirsty suggested. Kirsty sits in a chair beside me, and we talk about everything, but Alex. A topic she knows to steer clear of, especially seeing as she’s going to a lot of trouble to try and make me feel better.

“Well, what do you think?” the stylist asks me.

“I love it.” This is the shortest my hair has been, it’s now a beautiful shoulder-length layered and with lighter tones through it.

“It suits you,” Kirsty says, admiring it. “Now it’s a shame you’re in no fit state for a night on the tiles.”

“Kirsty!”

“I know, it’s fine. We can grab some popcorn and chocolate at the shop, before heading to yours and watch some crappy TV or a movie—your choice. Come on, time to go.” Kirsty pays for my hair, insisting it’s her treat.

We walk back round to the flat, arm in arm. I feel better. My mood has been lifted, thanks to my best friend for just being herself. We do stop at a shop, for popcorn, chocolate and fizzy juice. Not things I usually have at home.

“So what time are you staying with me until?” I ask Kirsty once we are both settled on the couch.

“I’m meant to be meeting Michael at the club later. But I can change plans, he will understand.”

“No don’t change them. In a few hours I’ll be sleeping and you would have wasted your night.” I tease. “I presume he’s spending the night at yours then?”

“Yeah, but it took some convincing on my part to get him to stay. He didn’t want you to be on your own.”

“Kirsty, I’m not on my own. I have Joan and Murphy both here. Well, for tonight I do.”

“Michael will be here tomorrow I know that for sure, when they both leave.”

“Murphy is leaving but Joan is staying here. I heard her talk to Murphy the other night. She doesn’t think I’m ready to be left alone either. I know I need to sort myself out; I can’t be the reason to keep Murphy and Joan separated. I will go back to work in a few days, hopefully that will help. Routine.”

“What about your ante-natal appointment, would you like me to come with you?” she asks.

“Yes. If you could. I’m not ready to do that on my own.”

“You don’t have to. Now no more serious stuff, lets watch some TV.”

Kirsty leaves at eleven pm, after a fun-filled night of watching the comedy channel. She knows how to distract me from all my thoughts and fears. But now that I’m alone again, they all come creeping back to the forefront of my mind. I do feel tired and for the third night in a row, I don’t want to take the stairs to my bedroom, because that would mean sleeping in my bed alone and I’m not ready for that yet, either

“LIBBY, LIBBY.”

The voice sounds so real. He could be so close. His smile is so wide and it’s the one he wears only for me. I can’t open my eyes because I know, when I do, his voice will be gone again and my life plunged back into darkness. And just now I will take anything that will keep me close to him, even a dream.

“Libby, please baby. I need to see you.”

I open my eyes slowly, knowing it’s not him. My dreams are playing tricks with me. This must be a hallucination. I scream as a hand reaches toward me. The bruising on his face is the same as I remember. The cut under his eye still looks bad, even after all this time. “You can’t be real. Leave me alone.” I cry pulling myself into a ball.

“Mr. Mathews, step away.” Joan’s voice startles me.

“Joan. Please, I only want to see my wife.”

His words grab my attention. He is really kneeling down in front of me. Why is he here? Hasn’t he caused me enough pain with his cruel words? Joan is back at my side, comforting me. “Mr. Mathews, why are you here? You can’t undo the damage you’ve caused, if that’s why you’re here. You shouldn’t have come here.”

“Joan, for the love of God, will you shut up. I remember. I remember everything.”

“Please tell me you mean that, and you've not just said that because you think it’s what I need to hear,” I say, wiping tears from my face.

Joan leaves us alone, but again doesn't go far. I hear the kettle on in the kitchen. I get the feeling I might need something stronger than tea to get me through this. It’s only now that I notice it is daylight outside; at least I did manage to get some sleep during the night.

“Can I sit down?” he asks me. I point to the other end of the couch. I don’t want him that close to me; I’m scared I will do something I regret. His dark brown eyes look tired as they stay focused on me. “Libby, please, we need to talk. I remember everything.”

“So, do you really remember, or was it your parents or Michael that sent you here?”

“No, baby. I remember, I truly do. But I think I have Michael to thank for my memory returning. I can’t believe I’ve hurt the one person in the world that I love. The one person I made promises to. I’m so sorry.” I want to believe his words, but I’m not sure I can. When I left the hospital, I had vowed that would be the last time I saw him. It broke me.

I stand on shaky legs and walk slowly to the windows. It’s sunny outside and the sky is blue, and it’s a welcome change to the dull and dreary weather we’ve had for the last week. I feel him approach, but he doesn't touch me.

“Libby, I remember everything. I remember what should’ve been our first kiss by the banks of the loch. How perfect you looked standing in front of me. I remember our first time in here. I remember standing in our bedroom upstairs with you in my arms as you gazed out the window. I remember my teasing words.” He reaches out to me now and doesn't hesitate in wrapping his arms around my waist and letting them rest on my belly. “But most importantly, I remember how much I love you and our babies.”

His words make me dizzy. I stumble as I try to turn in his arms. He scoops me in his arms, even though he probably shouldn’t be doing that with his injuries, as he carries me to the couch.

“Joan,” he calls. “If you’ve made tea, Libby could use it just now.”