HIS Desire: An H.I.S. Novel (H.I.S. series Book 1) (25 page)

He breathed a sigh of relief when his brothers pulled their SUV behind him in the driveway. They hadn’t been followed. His girls were safe.

Now he had a family to build.

* * * * *

Kate stepped out of the shower and wrapped herself in a large bath towel. She’d enjoyed her afternoon with Reagan and Jesse. It felt like they were a family. She could be extremely happy with them. She loved them both.

Jesse had taken his daughter to bed to tuck her in and read her a bedtime story. As she put lotion on her body, she thought about being Reagan’s mother, stepmother. She still feared failure as a mother. What new mother didn’t? But she wanted the opportunity.

Tonight she was going to show Jesse how much she loved him.

He walked into the bathroom, and his eyes roamed over her. She tingled under his gaze as if his hands had followed his eyes, touching and caressing her body.

He closed in and leaned his forehead to hers. “God, you’re beautiful. I want you to wait for me on the bed. Just like you are.”

He pulled the towel down then reached up to rub his thumb over her nipple until it formed a stiff peak, making her catch her breath.

“After a quick shower, I’ll be in there to explore every inch of your sexy body, from the tip of your toes to the top of your head, and everywhere in between with certain places receiving special attention.”

Kate had to take control if she was going to show him that she loved him. She reached out and wrapped her hand around the large bulge in his pants.

“No, Jesse. I’ll wait for you like this, but I’ll be the one doing the exploring and giving the special attention, especially right here.”

She squeezed him and was rewarded with a throaty groan.

CHAPTER TWENTY ONE

“Don’t take too long in the shower.” Kate seductively slipped passed Jesse, surprised he didn’t stop her since she’d teased his large member to fully erect.

Butterflies filled her stomach. She loved this man and planned to use her heart to guide her body in demonstrating that love for him. It was the only way.

She knelt on the bed facing the bathroom door. This had to be perfect. Taking control from the beginning was necessary because once Jesse touched her she’d get lost in a sensual haze and want nothing but him inside her.

She closed her eyes as her body came alive as she recalled every kiss and every touch of his hands, fingers and tongue. A moan escaped her lips.

“Is that moan for me?”

Her eyes opened, and her breath caught. Jesse stood in the doorway, naked, a half-smile on his freshly shaven face and his erection standing against his belly. Good Lord, sex oozed from the man.

His gaze slid intimately over her. Her nipples hardened and her pulse raced.

She gazed into his eyes and watched them darken. “You are an impressive sight without your clothes.”

He walked slowly toward her, stopping an arm’s length away, making no move to touch her.

“So you’re in control. Are you going to tease me? Make me beg? Make me cry out for mercy?” The low, gravelly tone in his voice made her smile.

Trembling with need, she reached out to touch him, to indulge in the feel of his warm, smooth skin over taut muscles. Her hands followed her eyes as she began her exploration of the firm muscles of his bulging biceps. She traced the Ranger tattoo on his right arm. She’d ask him about that later.

She slid her hands across his soft skin to the sculpted muscles of his shoulders. Her heart raced. She knew how wonderful his hard body felt against hers. Waiting to have him inside her would be one of the toughest things she’d ever done, but she was determined to go slow and savor every moment. Let him feel her love.

Her hands continued their sensual journey and slid down his shoulders to his expansive chest. Her fingers played in the short, curly hair while she used her thumbs to tease his dark nipples. She longed to lick them, have her tongue tease them like he did to her. Would it feel as erotic for him?

Jesse groaned but showed great restraint by not moving. His only show of fighting to remain in control was his hands fisted at his sides.

Breathing hard, her greedy hands slid down his chest to his clearly defined, hard abdomen that grew rigid under her touch. His sharp intake of breath broke the silence.

She locked gazes with him. Heat shot through her. He hadn’t even touched her, and she felt the moisture between her thighs.

“Prepare to beg,” she whispered. “Lay down on the bed for me and keep your hands to yourself.”

He obeyed and issued a deep, guttural groan when she straddled him. He reached up to touch her breasts, but she knocked his hands away.

“Not yet. You got to do this last time, so it’s only fair I get to do it this time.”
And, to show you how much I love you
, she wanted to say, but knew it would ruin everything.

The way his hands wrapped in the sheet, anchoring him as he relinquished all control to her was an erotic gesture. It amped up her red-hot need for him.

“I’m all yours.”

She put her hands on his chest and leaned down to kiss him. It was a light, teasing kiss that sent electric shocks through her system. Lost in the moment, she slowly deepened the kiss, his lips parting and welcoming her tongue stroking seductively. He didn’t hold back, but let her lead the kiss making her melt from the inside out.

She lifted her mouth from his to gulp in air. His groans echoed through the room as she pressed unhurried kisses on his neck then used her mouth and her hands to touch, tease and taunt him as she made her way down his body to his stiff groin.

Locking gazes, she took him in her hand and brushed her lips across the base of his cock then slowly licked up his length swirling her tongue to taste his pre-cum.

Another groan erupted from Jesse’s chest. “You’re killing me, sweetheart.”

She smiled as his body stiffened when her tongue glided over his balls and all the way up again, licking the vein on his cock from base to crown, circling the engorged head before sliding her warm, wet mouth over his erection.

His hands tightened in the sheets, his breath came in jerky puffs and his hips thrust up, begging for her to take him again. “Deeper, Kate. Take me deep.”

Wanting to satisfy him, she sucked him in deep and hard using her fisted hand and mouth in unison, pumping up and down his shaft. The shaft that she wanted inside of her, hard and deep like she was taking him with her mouth. The fiery ache burned inside of her needing to be taken care of soon or she’d incinerate.

His body jerked when she used her other hand to squeeze and gently massage his balls, feeling them draw tight.

He reached down and pulled her up. “Enough.”

She smiled seductively, knowing how close she’d brought him, crawled up and straddled him.

“Condom.”

She left the bed and returned with a condom and rolled it on him, then positioned his hard cock between her thighs, guided him into her wet heat, sliding all the way down. She didn’t move but savored the feel of him deep inside her.

“Damn, you’re wet. It’s time for me to touch you now?”

She didn’t object when he reached up and grasped her breasts. She arched into his hands as he caressed them and teased her puckered nipples. “Lean down.”

She leaned forward and moaned as he took one of her breasts in his mouth. She needed to move, to take away the ache. He reached down and grasped her hips and began to guide her up and down in a slow, sensual rhythm.

“Ride me, Kate,” he growled between tantalizing little bites on her nipple.

She took over the movement of their hips and moaned at the pleasure. After freeing her breast, she took his mouth with hers. One of his hands left her hips and tangled in her hair, grabbed the back of her head and angled her head to deepen the kiss. He took control, devouring her mouth.

Anticipation licked through her like a flame adding to her already ignited fire. She sat up, put her hands on his chest, adjusting, slowly building a rhythm that mixed intense pleasure with the ache inside of her drawing tight into a fiery knot waiting to be released.

“I’ve never seen a sexier sight. You above me, my cock buried deep inside you, your breasts in my hands, the feel of your hard nipples as I rub my thumb over them and the little moan from you when I do this.” He pinched and tugged at her nipples, tormenting her, shooting fire-bolts to her belly.

She couldn’t repress the moan or the involuntary contraction of her vagina squeezing him as she rose above him.

His groan vibrated from deep within his chest, sounding almost like a wounded animal, the pain of holding back for her sake evident. He grabbed her hips. “Fuck.” He moved her up and down faster.

Once she was set in the new rhythm, he reached between them and rubbed her swollen clit, circling, keeping a constant friction that had her climbing to the ragged edge.

She couldn’t fight it, didn’t want to fight it. She fisted her hand in her mouth to keep from crying out. Then she fell, free-falling into seemingly endless wave after wave of tiny fiery explosions, leaving her floating like a feather from cloud to cloud, drifting slowly back to earth in a state of bliss, collapsing on top of Jesse, limp, sated.

In a single fluid motion, he quickly flipped them over, grabbed her ass and drove into her, thrusting hard and fast, groaning harshly as he finally claimed his own release. He slumped forward, his flushed, sweaty body to hers.

She smiled. Now, he should know she loved him.

* * * * *

Jesse lifted himself off of Kate and went into the bathroom to clean up. Their lovemaking had been different tonight, more passionate, more intense. She cared for him, probably as deeply as he cared for her.

“That was incredible.” He walked back into the bedroom and smiled when he saw Kate sound asleep. He reached down and pushed the hair from her face. She was beautiful, and she was his.

He leaned down and kissed her forehead before moving to his side of the bed. He slid to her and held her against him, her back to his front. She fit perfectly. She was meant to be there. Meant to be a part of his life. A part of his and his daughter’s life. Jen would’ve approved of her as a mother to Reagan.

His daughter liked her. A lot. After tonight, he didn’t worry about her breaking Reagan’s heart. She was staying.

Only one thing could ruin it all. He’d have to make sure that didn’t happen.

* * * * *

Jesse walked toward the store and stopped midway when his cell phone rang. He saw it was his brother and answered.

He heard a gunshot. His body went on instant alert and a sudden sinking feeling ran through him. Jen was in the store. She had to be all right. She had to be safe.

He couldn’t wait for backup. It was Jen. His wife. Ignoring protocol, he put his phone in his pocket and entered the gas station alone. She was on the floor with a gunshot wound to her head. There was so much blood. He knew. He knew.

He refused to release her hand when the paramedics arrived. She was gone. There was nothing they could do for her. He shouldn’t have let her go in by herself. He should have gone into the store with her. He shouldn’t have taken the phone call. He’d have been there. It was his job to protect her. He’d failed.

Jesse jerked awake at the sound of a beautiful, angelic feminine voice calling his name, dragging him from the darkness. His first thought was that Jen was calling him, telling him it was only a nightmare, that he hadn’t failed, but he knew the voice. It was Kate. His Kate.

“Jesse, you okay? You were having a nightmare.” Her hand rested on his chest, right above his pounding heart. Her eyes were filled with concern.

How long had she been trying to wake him, witnessing him in his own hell?

“It was nothing.” He threw his arm across his eyes and tried to calm his racing pulse and his rapid breathing.

“It helps if you talk about it.”

He climbed out of bed, pulled on his boxer shorts and paced the room.
Should I tell her? She might not trust me to protect her. Might expect me to make the wrong choice and not be there when she needs me.

A muscle clenched in his jaw, and his fists clenched at his sides while he fought the battle raging inside him. He knew she cared about him but could it withstand this? He didn’t want to lose her, didn’t want her to send him away. He was in too deep.

He stopped pacing and turned to her. He felt the overwhelming need to tell her. He opened his mouth to speak but suddenly found it impossible. The heavy weight of the guilt he wore constricted his lungs. He closed his eyes to regain control.

Then the nightmare flashed before his eyes. It had been five fucking years, but it still felt like yesterday. He’d taken that call instead of finding out what held her up in the store. He could have been there. He could have saved her.

“I was married.” The rawness of his voice surprised him.

She stared at him for what seemed like forever before she spoke, “I know.”

He cleared his throat. “We were married for four years. Two months after Reagan was born, she died in a convenience store robbery.” He fought to continue, fearing her reaction. “I should have been there to save her. Instead, I was bullshitting with my brother.” The tone of his voice captured his tortured soul.

She remained silent, allowing him the time to collect himself and explain.

A muscle clenched in his jaw as he began pacing again. He couldn’t look at her, didn’t want to see the accusation that would appear in her eyes. “We stopped to get gas…” He told her the story. Turmoil roiled through him as he ripped open the bleeding wounds, tearing what remained of his empty and damaged soul.

He stopped pacing and looked at her. “I won’t go through that again. I’ll protect you, Kate. You can trust that I won’t make that same mistake.

“If it hadn’t have been for my family, Reagan and I would still be lost and grieving. I couldn’t function after I lost Jen. Em was young, but she stepped up and took care of my daughter for me. I was a mess. Not only had I lost the woman I loved, but I could have saved her. I knew something was wrong. She was taking too long.