Hold U Down (17 page)

She bent down and kissed him on the cheek. “Bigg, I love you, but I can't stand to see you like this anymore.”

Bigg opened his eyes, thinking he was dreaming, but her words and her close presence startled him. “Not now, Nique. I ain't got time for this shit!”

Bigg's booming voice startled his sleeping son. Climbing down out of Unique's arms, Dontay stood by her side and held her hand.

“I can't help you if you won't let me, Bigg, so I'm going home.”

Seeing a duffle bag sitting by the door, he realized that she wasn't playing. “So you just gon' leave me like this?”

“I don't want to, but you need some help, and evidently I can't give it to you.”

Hating the sound of her voice, Bigg told himself that he didn't care if she left or stayed. “Fuck you, Unique! You just like my mother and that bitch Carmella. The first chance you get, you gon' leave. Well, fuck you then! Leave!” He turned his head and closed his eyes.

A minute or two passed by before Bigg reopened his eyes and turned, only to find Unique still standing there. “What, you can't hear? Get the fuck out! Leave!”

Hurt beyond words, Unique's chest began to heave up and down as her lips trembled with fear. She felt the tears rising in her throat, but she still tried to hold them in.

Looking up at her, Bigg knew that he was wrong, but at that moment, he didn't give a fuck.

Not wanting to, but knowing she had to, Unique turned her back to Bigg, grabbed her keys, held tightly onto the little hand that was inside of hers, and left.

It took Unique approximately twenty minutes to get to Carmella's house. It was the middle of the night, and all of the lights were out. Having only talked to her on the phone a couple of times, she didn't know how Carmella would react to seeing her on her doorstep with her son.

Stepping up to the door, Unique knocked quietly, not wanting to wake Dontay, who had fallen asleep during the ride. It took a minute, but she finally came to the door.

“Who is it?”

“Carmella, it's me, Unique.”

“Is everything all right?” she asked, opening the door.

“Yes and no.”

“Come in. It's freezing outside.”

“I'm sorry I didn't call first. Bigg wouldn't give me your number.”

“What's going on?” she asked, taking Dontay from Unique's arms and laying him down on the couch.

“Bigg is having an episode, and I didn't want Dontay to be around him while he is like that.”

“Thank you. I'm glad you brought him home.”

“Well, it's late. Let me get home.” Unique bit down on her lip, unsure of what else to say.

“Wait. There's something I want to talk to you about.”

Unique wondered what Carmella could possibly want to discuss with her. The two had nothing in common besides loving Bigg. To Unique, Carmella was nothing but a square broad that wasn't down to ride for her man. Curious, she followed her into the kitchen and took a seat at the table.

“Would you like a cup of coffee?”

“Yes, please. I could use it.”

“I know how you feel. I used to be just like you.”

“What do you mean by that?” Unique questioned, getting defensive.

“I didn't mean it like that. I meant that I used to feel like I needed to save Bigg, too, but no matter how hard I tried, I never could.”

“I just don't know what to do,” Unique said, letting her guard down.

“There's really nothing you can do, Unique. Bigg has to help himself first before anybody can help him. I tried getting him to take his medication, but he wouldn't, and I got tired of the highs and lows that came along with being with him.”

“I can't get him to take his medication either.”

“And you won't be able to until he gets over his fears.”

“I don't get it, though. Why won't he take it?”

“I guess he never told you what happened.”

“No. What happened?”

“When Bigg was twelve, his mom started to notice that something wasn't quite right with him. You know, he would start spazzing out for no reason, and she never understood why. Well, back then, nobody knew what being bipolar was, so she sent him to a mental institution instead of to a doctor.

“The facility she put Bigg in was like something out of a horror flick. Bigg said they put him in a strait jacket and tied him down to his bed at night. They shot him up with all kinds of different experimental drugs. Now, mind you, he was only twelve years old,” Carmella explained, handing Unique her cup of coffee.

“The orderlies beat the fuck out of him because he talked back. You know that long gash on his back came from when he was in that mental institution. One of the orderlies beat him so bad with a belt that the skin on his back opened up. He had to get stitches and everything. They even did shock treatments on him. He told me that he cried for his mother and begged her to let him come home, but she wouldn't. You know that bitch was evil.”

“I know.” Unique nodded her head in agreement. “Bigg told me about his mother.”

“Yeah, I'm glad her ass died before I had Dontay, 'cause ain't no way I would've let her come around him. But anyway, he was there for a month, and after he got out, Bigg said he was like a walking zombie. They had him hooked on so many drugs that he didn't know which way was left and which way was right. It took him another month to get the drugs out of his system.”

“I wonder why he never told me that,” Unique said with tears in her eyes.

“He probably didn't want you to worry since your mom is in a mental institution.”

“How you know about my mom?”

“Well, I did do a little background checking on you once I found out you and Bigg were serious.”

“I see.” Unique nodded, knowing she would've done the same thing.

“I couldn't deal with it, Unique, but you're stronger than I am when it comes to his illness. Bigg loves you. I've never seen him happier. Even when we were together, he was never this happy.”

“I love him, too. It just got a little hard tonight. It all reminded me of my mother and how she used to be.”

“Well you're about to be his wife, Unique. You gotta hold him down.”

With Bigg gone, nothing in Unique's life was the same. She knew that he needed her, but he wouldn't listen to anything she had to say. With the television on and turned down, she turned the volume up on the stereo and sang along to Mary J. Blige's “Don't Go.”

“Every day is not a perfect day, for you and I. Some days, some days things are just not right. That doesn't mean that I don't love you.”

“Unique, Unique!” Patience screamed, scaring the hell out of her.

“What?” Unique asked, holding her chest.

“Turn on the news! They're talkin' about Bigg.”

Unique knew that something bad must have happened, so she rushed over to the television and turned up the volume.

“Shit!” Unique said, grabbing the phone, dialing Bigg's cell but getting no answer. She hung up and called Zoë.

“Hello?”

“Are you watching the news?”

“No, I'm waiting on Legend. We're going out on a date, but he's late for some reason.”

“Bigg's studio just got raided by the feds.”

“For real?” Zoë replied nonchalantly, knowing the code:
Don't say shit over the phone
.

“Yeah.”

“Have you talked to him?”

“No. I tried calling his cell, but he didn't pick up.”

“Damn, that's fucked up. You want me to come over there?”

“Yeah, but I don't want to fuck up your plans.”

“It's cool, ma. Let me call Legend and see what's up.”

Clicking over, Zoë dialed his cell.

“Hello?”

“Where you at?”

“I got caught up fuckin' with this nigga Gary. How about we get together tomorrow?” he lied. Legend was really at the police station going through evidence found in Bigg's office.

“Okay, but you could've called,” Zoë said with an attitude.

“I know, baby. I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise.”

Thinking about the things he did with his tongue, she smiled as she clicked him off and resumed her conversation with Unique.

“Well, I'm free, so I'll be over there in like thirty minutes. We can go out and have drinks or something.”

“A'ight. One,” Unique said, hanging up.

Dialing Bigg's phone once more, she left him a message telling him to call her ASAP.

Across the way, Bigg sat on a bar stool at T Billy's as if nothing had happened, sipping on a bottle of Hen. Once Chris had heard about the raid on the studio, he decided it was best to get Bigg out of the house before he hurt himself or someone else.

Surveying the crowd, Bigg knew that they were all watching him, but he didn't give a fuck. They could all suck his dick as far as he was concerned.

Beep. . .Beep
went the sound of Bigg's cell phone, but he didn't care. He saw Unique's number flashing across the screen of his phone, but he couldn't talk to her. He was still mad at the fact that she had left him. To him, Unique left him at the one time he needed her most. The first chance she got, she up and ran out on him. In Bigg's mind, that was betrayal, and he couldn't forgive her for that so soon.

“'Sup, Bigg?” Kiara playfully whispered into his ear.

“What's up, Ki?”

“Shit, I heard what happened. You a'ight?”

“You know a nigga straight. The feds ain't got nothing on me.” Bigg played it off.

“Where my cousin at?”

“She at home I guess.”

“Uh-oh, do I detect trouble in paradise?”

“We cool.”

“Just cool? You and Nique used to be great. You know, honestly, I never saw y'all together anyway.”

“Why you say that?” Bigg asked, walking dead into her trap.

“It's nothing.” She smirked, waving him off.

“If you got something to say, say it.”

“I shouldn't be the one telling you this, but my cousin is foul.”

“What you mean, Unique foul?”

“Are you sure you want to hear this?”

“I ain't got time to play wit' you, Kiara. Just tell me what the fuck is up.”

“Okay, okay, damn. Calm down. You not gon' like this, but . . . Unique and Tone are still fuckin' around.”

Feeling his heart drop out of his chest, Bigg stared ahead, showing no emotion on his face. He learned at an early age to never let his true feelings show. “Always keep your feelings close to your heart,” his father would say.

“I'm sorry, Bigg. I shouldn't have told you.”

“Man, get the fuck outta here. I don't believe that shit. Unique hasn't had any contact with that nigga in almost a year.”

“Sorry, Bigg, but I have proof.”

“What kind of proof?”

“Tone showed me these pictures the last time I saw him here,” she said, reaching into her purse. “Here.” She handed him the photos.

The first photo showed Unique getting out of Bigg's Range Rover and heading into Tone's house. The second one showed them coming out together, with Tone wearing nothing but a pair of boxers. The third one showcased Unique hugging and Tone smiling.

“When I saw them, I took 'em 'cause I didn't want him putting my cousin's business out there in the street,” Kiara continued, making the situation worse.

He couldn't believe it. Kiara was actually telling the truth. Unique was fucking Tone. The blood in Bigg's body was past the boiling point. First the feds were watching him, then his studio gets raided, and now his girl was playing him. He couldn't take it anymore. Bigg was about to snap.

Seeing that her plan was working, Kiara tried her best to hide the wicked grin that was slowly creeping onto her face. She knew that taking the pictures of Unique and Tone would pay off sooner or later. It was just a matter of the perfect time and place, and she couldn't have planned it better if she tried.

Kiara had known that some shit was about to go down when they all returned from New Jersey, so the day of their last meeting together, she followed Unique. Unique never had a clue.

“I can't believe this shit.”

“I'm sorry, Bigg,” she said sympathetically. “Is there anything I can do to help?” Kiara traced her finger down his cheek, getting in his face.

“You and Unique are cousins. Why you telling me all of this?”

“'Cause Unique living foul, and I don't condone that shit. How she could play a fine nigga like you, I'll never know.”

“And you never will,” Bigg replied, pushing past her.

“Ah, nigga, you should be thanking me!”

 

 

Less than ten minutes later, Bigg was at Unique's building, banging on her door. He had been standing there for five minutes before he realized that she wasn't there. Taking his phone out of his pocket, he dialed her cell, but she didn't answer that either. Already heated, he assumed that she was with Tone. Walking back to his car, he decided the best thing to do was wait.

 

 

“You feel any better?”

“A little. I won't be okay until I know Bigg's okay though.” Unique said as she and Zoë rode back to her house.

“Girl, everything's gonna be a'ight. You and Bigg have made it through plenty of other shit. Y'all gon' make it through this too.”

“I keep on telling myself that.” Unique began to speak but felt a vibration coming from her purse. It was her two-way going off. “Damn, he just called me and I missed it. I'll call him when I get in the house.”

“You want me to stay for a little while?” Zoë asked as they pulled up to Unique's building.

“Nah, I'm cool, but thanks anyway,” she replied, mustering up a smile.

“Okay, I'm gon' holla at you tomorrow then.”

“A'ight,” Unique said, in a hurry to get out of the car and in the house. Noticing Bigg stepping out of his Range Rover, a smile a mile wide appeared on Unique's face. “Bigg,” she gushed as he approached her.

“What up, Bigg?” Zoë spoke, rolling down the passenger-side window.

“You fuckin' that nigga?” he barked, getting into Unique's face and pinning her up against the car.

“What?” she asked, caught off guard.

“You heard me! You still fuckin' Tone?” He yanked her up by the neck.

“Bigg, stop!” Zoë yelled.

“Bigg, what are you talkin' about? You trippin', baby. Come in the house so you can get some rest,” Unique pleaded, trying to remove his hand from her neck.

“Fuck you! I ain't going nowhere wit' you!” Bigg yelled, back-handing her face as tears fell from his eyes onto her hands.

Jumping out of the car, Zoë raced to help her cousin.

“You been fuckin' that nigga behind my back this whole time?”

“What the fuck are you talkin' about, Bigg?” she asked, unsure of what to do because of his mental state.

“I know you been fuckin' that nigga! I saw the pictures, bitch! I told you if I ever caught you wit' that nigga I was gon' kill you. How the fuck you gon' play me like that?” Bigg continued to cry as he looked her dead in the eyes.

“Bigg, I don't know what you think you saw, but you need to let her go. Unique ain't fuckin' Tone.”

“Baby, let's just go in the house and talk about this. Somebody's been lying to you.”

“Why the fuck would yo' cousin lie to me?” he yelled, throwing her body up against the car.

“My cousin?”

“Yeah, Kiara!”

“Kiara told you that shit?” Zoë asked, shocked.

“She told me everything. Your game is up.”

“I don't know what you're talkin' about, Bigg. I swear,” Unique assured.

“Yeah, a'ight, keep lying. I can't believe you. I'm out here watching my back, thinking these niggas is out to get me, when all along I should've been watching you. Snake-ass bitch! How the fuck you gon' play me like that? I was planning on marrying you.”

“What is going on out here?” Jeffrey, the doorman, questioned.

“Nigga, mind yo' business,” Bigg snapped.

“How dare you speak to me like that. I'm calling the police.”

“Jeffrey, please don't! He didn't mean it.” Turning back to Bigg, she continued, “Baby, please. Don't do this. We still can get married.”

“I knew you was a sleazy bitch. Got me out here in these streets grindin' for you, and that's how you do me. That's a'ight, though, 'cause I'm done fuckin' wit' yo' trick ass!” He pushed her with all his might, causing her neck to jerk back.

“Bigg, look what you did! Are you okay?” Zoë asked, examining Unique for injuries.

“I'm okay. Bigg, wait! Let me explain,” she begged, holding her neck and trying to reach for his hand.

“Fuck you! Don't touch me! I trusted you!”

“Fuck me? No, fuck you! After all we've been through you gon' say fuck me?” Unique yelled, trying to break loose from Zoë so she could hit Bigg.

“Uh-uh, Z! Let me go! This nigga done lost his mind!”

“Zoë, take her in the house! She's making a fool out of herself.” Bigg walked away, ignoring her.

“Oh, so I'm a fool now? After all I've done for you, you gon' do me like this? I was the one who took care of you when yo' retarded, depressed ass needed help. Me, Bigg! Not Cezar, not Kiara, not Chris, not NaSheed. Me! And you gon' have the audacity to accuse me of some bullshit I didn't even do? Nigga, fuck you!”

Unique knew that she was hurting him, but she didn't care. Bigg had made a fool out of her. Watching him as he left, Unique cried what seemed to be a million tears, because she knew that this time she had fucked up.

 

 

Back in his car, Bigg called Chris.

“What up?”

“Where you at?” Bigg asked, smoking a blunt.

“I'm still down here at T Billy's. Where you at?”

“I'm leaving Unique's house.”

“You should come back down here. It's poppin', man.”