I Put a Spell on You (20 page)

Now convinced no one is this unlucky. If I’d not been held up by that lorry, I’d have been on the bridge when my windscreen cracked. I’m aching all over, but my physical injuries are nothing compared to the sick feeling of dread I’ve got all the time. I think Xander is right and I need to tell Harry what’s going on. But now worried I’ve let it go too far. How can I tell her now? No, I need to do a bit of detective work, I think, to find out who’s doing this.

December 16

Hard to keep updating this, with so much happening, but I feel now I need to have a record of it somewhere. Just in case, you know? Things are getting really, really bad. There have been no more accidents, nothing physical, but now it’s just mental.

Have managed to stall Xander and not tell Harry yet – helped by her heading off to a yoga retreat in Thailand for a fortnight. Was so pleased to see her go, would have driven her to the airport myself if I’d got over my fear of driving. But now things are getting really weird.

I hear footsteps behind me, all the time. When I’m walking home in the dark, I’m sure there’s someone there. But when I turn round, the street is empty. Or I hear a heavy tread coming along the hall to my bedroom and pausing outside the door. Once I even heard breathing. The first time I was quite brave and flung the door open – there was no one there, though. Now I just stay in bed and shout at whoever’s there to go away.

Yesterday, I heard laughter behind me as I cleared out the stationery cupboard at work. I felt hot breath on my neck when I waited for the bus in the darkening evening after my shift last night and this morning, as I chatted to Fi on the phone in my living room, during the day. My skin prickled as the breath warmed my ear and a strand of my hair waved gently in the breeze. It sounds like nothing when I write it down, but it’s so, so frightening.

I’m a nervous wreck. I can’t sleep. My heart is pounding all the time, despite my pills, and I’ve hardly eaten. But I can’t tell anyone. Who would believe me?

I’ve got an idea. I’ve been researching black magic and though most of it sounds crazy, my life is so crazy at the moment that it seems believable. I’ve heard if you want to curse someone, all you need is something that belongs to them. And I think it’s my watch. I lost it a while ago. I’d taken it off at work to help Harry decanting some oils, and when I came back to my desk it was gone. I searched high and low for it that day. Then just as I was leaving, a client came into reception with it – she’d found it on the wall outside. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but now I wonder if someone took it and did something with it.

Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I’m losing my mind – I’m certainly not myself. I’m sweating and nervy, and I know I need to go back to the hospital to get my pills checked, because all this stress isn’t helping my heart. But now I’m convinced someone from the spa knows something. And I think I know who it is. I just need to get some proof.

Chapter 29

I had cramp in one of my legs and I was desperate for a wee, but I didn’t want to stop reading. Poor Star, trying to protect me from some nutter.

I felt so awful having my worst fears confirmed in black and white. And hopelessly touched at how much Star had wanted to protect me.

And as for Xander, I couldn’t believe he’d known about the threatening letters and hadn’t said a word. What was he thinking? Was that the abuse of trust that the Tarot cards had warned me about?

As if he’d read my mind, Xander stuck his head round the door.

“How’s it going?’ he said. “Do you want a cup of tea?”

I nodded.

“I’m about halfway through. Star wrote down everything,” I said, watching him carefully for a reaction. He didn’t so much as flinch.

“I’ll come and get my tea in a second,” I said. “I just want to finish this bit.”

Xander shut the door and I heard his footsteps echo down the hall. Desperate now for a wee, I put the diary down on the sofa and stood up, wincing as the blood flowed into my pins-and-needley feet.

I headed to the loo, then into reception. Esme and Xander were chatting quietly, Louise was typing something on her phone. As I came in, they all looked up at me in expectation.

“Anything?” Esme said.

I took the mug Xander held out and wrapped my fingers round it.

“Loads,” I said, not sure where to start. “It seems I was right about being the target.”

I explained about the letters arriving, addressed to me, but Star keeping them a secret and deciding to do a protection charm.

“She did a charm?” Esme said, impressed. “Mind you, she obviously didn’t do it right. Did she do it on her own?”

I looked at Xander, who did at least look slightly sheepish.

“I helped her,” he said.

Esme looked astonished.

“You knew about the letters?”

Xander shrugged his broad shoulders.

“I knew about them,” he said. “I just didn’t realise how serious it all was.”

“Why didn’t you mention this before?” Louise suddenly sounded like a detective.

“I didn’t think,” Xander said. He was pale and his face looked clammy. “I thought she was making something out of nothing, you know? She was a bit hysterical, Star. You know what she was like, Harry. She was always getting excited over something.”

I nodded, slowly.

“She was a bit exuberant,” I admitted, feeling sorry for poor dead Star whose enthusiasm was being used as a stick to bash her with.

“I think she really liked me,” I said. “Not many people like me.”

Esme muttered something under her breath and I shot her a look.

“She was just looking out for me,” I said.

Louise put the palms of her hands together and tapped her lips with her forefingers thoughtfully.

“You got in the way,” she said to Xander. “You and Star. Someone wanted to hurt Harry, you got in the way, and Star died.”

“This is exactly what I was afraid of,” I said. “It’s my fault.”

“No,” Esme said. “Star was ill – she had a dodgy heart. She might have died anyway.”

I wasn’t convinced.

“I’ll get the diary,” I said. “I’d like to know what you all think.”

I went back into my office, but the diary wasn’t on the sofa where I’d left it. I looked on the floor and on my desk, but it wasn’t there either. Strange.

I felt down the side of the sofa cushions, but it wasn’t there. I looked in my bag. Nope.

I shrugged. I never lost anything because I had a secret weapon. I waggled my fingers and watched as a shower of sparks flew from my fingertips and bounced around the room. I held my hand out, expecting the diary to appear – but nothing happened. That was strange.

I tried again. This time, the sparks bounced even more and it seemed to me that there was more magic in the air than just mine. Had Esme summoned it?

I wandered back into reception.

“Do you have it?” I asked Ez, who was standing leaning against Star’s desk, playing with her hair.

“Have what?” she said.

“The diary.”

“Why would I have it?” Esme looked exhausted and like a toddler, she got very grumpy when she was tired.

“You had it,” she said, over-emphasising the words as though she was speaking to an old lady. “You were reading it in your office.”

“I know,” I said, feeling my irritation levels building. “I left it on the sofa, and now it’s gone. I thought you might have picked it up.”

Esme and I faced each other across the room. If we’d been cats, our backs would have been arched. Xander and Louise stayed where they were, on either side of us, frozen. I saw Xander raise an eyebrow at Lou, and she flashed him a quick, awkward smile.

“You would have seen me if I’d gone in there,” Esme said. “What’s the matter with you?”

My annoyance spilled over.

“There’s magic in my office,” I said. “There’s magic there, and no diary. Forgive me for assuming you’d done it.”

Esme looked shocked.

“Magic?” she said. “I didn’t do magic.”

“Well, someone did and now the diary’s gone.”

“How do we know it wasn’t you?” Esme said.

I stared at her.

“How do we know you didn’t get rid of the diary because it revealed something incriminating about you?”

“I didn’t hurt Star,” I said.

“So you say,” Esme said. “How do I know you’re telling me the truth?”

“What’s to say you didn’t get rid of it, because it revealed something about you?” I said.

“I didn’t even know Star,” Esme pointed out.

“This isn’t about Star, though, is it?” I said. “It’s about me.”

“Harry,” Lou said, in a warning tone. “Don’t do this.”

“No,” Esme said, her voice shrill. “Let’s. Let’s do this. If Harry wants to accuse me of something then it’s best it’s all out in the open.”

She sat down on one of the comfy chairs and leaned back.

“Come on then,” she said. “Tell me what I’m supposed to have done.”

“The divination,” I said, warming to my accusations. “It showed that you had something to do with all this.”

“Mum said we shouldn’t pay too much attention to that,” Esme said. She looked horrified at how unjust I was being. I didn’t blame her. I was horrified too. But I couldn’t stop.

“And now the diary that tells the truth about what happened to Star just happens to vanish,” I said. “Good one, Ez. Brilliant.”

“Why would I do this?” Esme said. “I’ve got a nice life. Why would I ruin it by ruining yours?”

“Why do you do anything, Esme?” I said. Even to my own ears I sounded weary. Older. Jaded. “Are you jealous of me? Is that it?”

“Jealous of you?” Esme said. “Hardly.”

She was probably telling the truth. I may have had a great business, and a smoking hot wardrobe but my personal life was shot, and no one knew that better than Esme.

“Jealous of my witchcraft,” I said, seizing on the one thing I knew I did better than Esme. “Jealous that I’m part of something with my mum and your mum, and you’re on the sidelines.”

Esme winced as my low blow hit a nerve. For years she’d rejected her magical roots but she’d been working really hard to rebuild her relationship with her mum – and get to grips with her magic.

“You want to be the hero,” I said. “You want to be the one who saves the day. You’re sabotaging my business so you can jump in and save it and get the glory.”

“You bitch,” Esme said. “You utter, bloody bitch. I can’t believe you’d think that of me.”

Beside me, Xander shifted in his chair.

“Why don’t we take a break,” he said. “Harry, grab some things and come back to mine for tonight. It’s probably best if you two aren’t around each other just now.”

Esme looked shocked that Xander would side with me and again I wondered what I’d interrupted in Xander’s office earlier.

We all looked at each other for a moment and I realised I’d gone too far. Way, way too far.

“Thanks for the offer, Xander,” I said. “I’ll be fine at home.”

Esme looked like she might start crying at any second. Guilt twisted in my heart.

“Guys,” I said. “Would you mind leaving us alone? I’ll call you tomorrow, Lou.”

“Sure?” Xander said.

“Sure.”

He and Louise picked up their bags and coats, said goodbye and left. I heard their footsteps echoing down the mews.

Esme looked at me.

“You didn’t want to go to Xander’s?” she said.

“Silly idea,” I admitted. “Thought I should stay here and face the music.”

Esme stood up so we were standing opposite each other like boxers squaring up at the beginning of a fight.

“Me?” she asked. “Am I the music you need to face?”

I gave her a small smile.

“Sorry,” I said, wincing. I hated apologising for anything. “I didn’t mean what I said about your mum and everything.”

Esme wasn’t forgiving me that easily.

“And about me sabotaging the business,” she said.

“That too.”

“And do you think I took the diary?”

I was cross now.

“No I don’t,” I said with a sigh. “I’m sorry, okay? I was upset and I just lashed out at you because…”

“Because?”

“Because you’re the person who I’m closest to,” I said. I was reluctant to confess that I needed her but I knew Esme – ironically – would understand. She resented our closeness too and I was sure she too often wished we could do without each other. I couldn’t do without her, though. I knew she had my back – and I had hers, though it had taken a while for her to realise that.

“I’ve got your back,” Esme said now, echoing my thoughts.

“I know,” I said. “Also, you’re rubbish at magic. You’d never be able to hide the diary so well that I couldn’t find it.”

“Thanks,” she said, pretending to be more hurt than she was. “You’re right. You can out-witch me any day of the week.”

“Should we hug?” Esme asked, still standing in front of me, like a naughty child in front of a headmaster.

“Don’t push your luck,” I said. “Let’s go home and go to bed. It’s been a really long day. Are you around tomorrow?”

“Why?” Esme asked.

I had been hoping she wouldn’t ask, to be honest. I had an idea to try some more divination and I was pretty convinced she wouldn’t be up for it.

“I’ve got a plan,” I said. I kissed her on the cheek. “I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Esme said uncertainly.

“Sorry,” I said again. “Let’s go home.”

Chapter 30

I woke up early the next morning. I was still shaken and uneasy after my fight with Esme, and the diary going missing, but I had a plan. I wanted to do more divination. I’d been reading about it and I’d discovered a branch of the art, if you could call it that, known as mirror divination. Like Esme had said, it all sounded a bit hocus-pocus and I wasn’t completely sold on the idea, but I thought if I could see an actual picture it might be easier to interpret.

Fizzing with energy I went for a run round Inverleith Park. It was freezing and the ducks perched miserably on the icy pond. I didn’t care though. It felt good to be out in the fresh air.

As I was stretching out by our front door, my phone rang.

“You didn’t tell me you’ve got bloody CCTV,” Louise said, not bothering to say hello.