Icing (12 page)

“Well, me too.  You should come to see the performance.  It’s in Northampton at the Music Academy.  “Chicago” – set in the 1920’s.  I have one of the female leads.  I’m not
the lead
but close. I play Velma.  We will open in early spring.”

“I’m sure you be amazing.  I don’t get into Northampton much – too bohemian.  I’m just a hockey boy from Buffalo.  If I do I will be sure to catch you if the timing’s right.”

“Cool, you would love it.  It was great running into you Kyle.”

Kyle had the same feeling he had when he first laid eyes on her.  He made a mental note of her upcoming performance in Northampton.  The season was pretty intense in the early spring but a trip to see Taryn dancing around on stage would be worth it.

****

“Kyle are you taking off a week for Christmas?”

“That’s the plan Tru.  Same drill as last year.  Spending the rest of the break here.  I could stay home longer but the easy access to the arena and weight room really helps.  Of course I’ll stay longer if my Mom needs me.  She has been holding her own. She’s been eating a little which is encouraging but we will see how it plays out.  I’m going to catch a Sabres game with my Dad and his brother.  It’s a “boy’s night out” sort of thing.  My Dad has been a rock to the whole family for a year now and he deserves to get away for a couple of hours. My sister and Brian will be there to keep an eye on things.  Wouldn’t it be something if my Mom got through this?”

“Send her my best. I guess I’ll see you in mid-January.  Get some rest Kyle.  There is life beyond hockey.  You never date or party.  I’m afraid you’re missing out.”

“Message taken Tru.  Thanks for keeping an eye on me man, it means a lot.”

Kyle was back to Buffalo where they had a very low key holiday planned.  They were surprised at Thanksgiving by the engagement of Juliet and Brian.  They already acted like a married couple.  They finished each other’s sentences and they both attended community college.  There was not a minute of the day they were not together.  To his credit Brian never shied away from his responsibilities where Mrs. Caldwell was concerned.  Most 20 year olds would cut and run but he was true blue.  Their upcoming nuptials would dominate the conversation at Christmas. It would be good for his Mother to have something positive to focus on.

“Hey Juliet.  Merry Christmas.  Are we going to start planning the wedding while I’m here?”

“Well Big Bro you are a little late because we proceeded without you.  Brian and I thought there was no sense in waiting.  We had a small ceremony in the St. Rose Church.  It was just Mom, Dad, the Gorski’s and Bree.  We have a lot of pictures.  Time was an issue and we will take a trip this summer to celebrate a late honeymoon.  We were thinking a car trip throughout New England.  It’s your neck of the woods so you can help us map out a trip.  Please don’t feel left out we hope you understand Kyle.”

“Well, yes Juliet I do understand and wow, I should call you Mrs. Gorski now.”

They did not speak about it much more because it was the big elephant in the room that they weren’t discussing.  She wanted to enjoy the day with her mother while she was still around.  Juliet was a lot closer to the situation while Kyle was knowingly keeping his head in the sand. Juliet was living day to day with the reality of Mrs. Caldwell’s disease and he chose to ignore it while it was still possible.

Christmas was merry but they all missed Keith who was in the Caribbean with Sharon and her family.  He was preparing for dental school down south.  He was avoiding the reality of their Mom’s illness even more than Kyle.  Grief is a tricky one.  It’s a personal journey and all the Caldwell’s had different ways to cope.

“Are we on for the Sabres game on the 27
th
?”

“I have the tickets.  Your Uncle Ray will be here in the afternoon and we will head in at around five.  They’re playing Toronto so the crowd will be extra loud.”

“Dad, don’t tell me the same couple still sits in front of us.  They come down from Toronto so I’m sure they won’t miss it.  They are at every game as far back as I can remember.  After all these years they are just “the couple from Canada”.  You would think I would know their names by now.  She has the worst accent and every player has a nick name that only she uses.  Her chants echo in my mind for days.  She always brings carrots and celery but you know she prefers chips by the look of her.”

“Yes Kyle, they still show up.  Easy does it on her look there buddy. We will see how you look at 60 when you don’t have the time for daily work-outs or youth on your side.”

“Yeah.  I guess she’s a part of the tradition.  She’s a loyal fan.  I give her that.”

Kyle slept in his old bed on the third floor that night but before he fell asleep he grabbed his phone and added a date to his calendar. He picked April 1.

                           
“Check out Taryn’s musical. Northampton”

A reminder, as she was a passing thought before he knocked out.
              He had a dream of what his little crush, who now he knew as musically inclined, was like.  He knew little but hungered for more.             

Uncle Ray arrived on the 27
th
with a box of Tim Horton doughnuts for everyone to enjoy.  He knew they were a favorite of Kyle’s.  He would lead all to believe it was just something he picked up.  He was not one to let others think he was sentimental or thoughtful in any way.  He was tough except with little Bree who was 13.  He saw his grown daughters in her.  He had been only a passing figure in their lives.  A regret perhaps.  One which this war veteran held along with many others that Kyle could only guess and would never mention.

They drove together in the blue sedan through the aging neighborhoods of his hometown.  He found himself defending Buffalo on many occasions.  It was a relic.  A former steel town that had its day but know struggled to survive in this new world.  You could drive for miles past the closed gates of the old industrial area and swear you saw ghosts of an old era.  Buffalo natives displayed a sense of pride that knew no equals.  Beer and sports reigned these days.  With their Sabres jerseys proudly displayed they headed to the First Niagara Center.  

The trio parked a couple of miles away to avoid the hefty parking fees.  It was cold, windy and the streets were deserted.  They huddled together and powered on while Uncle Ray reminisced about the old Aud where games of the glory days were played.

“Don’t know why they tore that thing down.  The ice was frozen and the beer cold.  Progress is a plague if you ask me.”

“Ray – we didn’t ask you”

“I want some peanuts.  Remember the old black guy who sold them outside the Aud?  Last I saw him he was two legs short of a pair.  The peanuts were still good though.”

“Enough Ray, yes we remember it all.  Let’s go see the present day Sabres beat the Leafs.”

The Sabres lost 3-1 but it was a night to remember.  A rare time to smile with Dad whose goofy grin had been put on hold since Mrs. Caldwell became ill.  The lady from Toronto was there.  She left happy.

****

Taryn was deeply immersed in the role of Velma.  She refused to get a flapper do and had to wear a wig but she started to appear otherwise right out of the 1920’s.  Thrift store shopping made it easy and this bit of character acting was working for her.  Yoga had helped her dancing and she often wondered if she might encounter Kyle.  This little flirtation created fodder for the imagination.

She finished up lunch at Mame’s.  They served popovers which were enormous and filled with intricate pathways for the butter to explore.  She had a side salad with blue cheese dressing and a chocolate crinkle cookie to finish off the meal.  It was heavenly and provided her with the stamina she needed to get through rehearsals.

She would channel Bob Fosse to get through the tightly choreographed numbers.  The male lead, Bobby, was played by Mason an Adonis looking guy in his early 30’s.  He and Taryn had unique on stage chemistry.  They had shared a couple of late night cocktails.  It was not the romance she had expected.  His boyfriend’s name was Dennis.  They developed a trusting friendship.  He had been involved in productions around the world including London’s West End and Broadway.  Mason was a mentor to Taryn and very generous with his depth of knowledge.  He saw a spark rarely seen.  Certainly not in a sprite from small town New England.

Taryn was driving home for a couple of days.  She needed the break before the performance began in mid-April.  She threw Fonda in the back of the wagon. Her cat was a well-seasoned traveler by now. In-fact she did quite well in the car.  It was a warm and sunny spot and it meant going to Concord where there were a lot of trees to climb.  She was and indoor/outdoor pet who loved mice and the occasional Cardinal.  There were plenty of mice in the Main Street apartment and Fonda reduced the population considerably.  At first Taryn, the animal lover, thought this was cruel.  Wendy added that it was a natural progression of the food chain.  Fonda seemed to develop a sense of pride in her results.  It was fine with Taryn if she could avoid quashing the carcasses with bare feet at night.

Arriving in Concord Taryn stopped in at the café to pick up some bagels and sweets to bring home.  She enjoyed the familiarity of the homey eatery.

“Hello Mrs. Sloane.  I have not seen you in ages.  Is Jen home or still up in Maine.  I’ve called her but it goes straight to voicemail.  Is Jen O.K. Mrs. Sloane.”

“Yes Taryn.  She had a hard time of it in Maine and she’s away for a while.  I will tell her you asked for her.  She will be in touch.”

“Mrs. Sloane, it’s me Taryn.  Where is Jen?”

“Taryn I have to respect her privacy.  The past year is her story to tell and she will.  Please just give her time.  She is in a safe place and she knows there is a lot of support for her here in Concord, but she can’t come home yet.”

“Mrs. Sloane.”

“You look well Taryn.  We’ll be in touch.”

“I’m at the same number.  Call.”

Taryn was confused and concerned.  She was self-involved with leaving school, living with Devon and becoming a star.  She rang up another friend she had recently neglected, Beth.

“Hey Beth.  It’s Taryn.  What’s up with Jen? I just saw Mrs. Sloane and something’s going on.”

“Hi T.  I was home from Ohio last week and there was something up so I went into private eye mode.  I got in touch with Brett who led me to believe there was some type of suicide attempt.  Jen took an overdose.  She got the pills from home which is pretty much a pharmacy.  The stress and loneliness got to her in Maine.  She was put in a mental health hospital to recover.  That’s all I know.

Taryn said little else and proceeded home with a puffy face and broken heart.  She forgot the sweets.  Her Mom was alone in the house and Taryn blew in like Mt. Aetna.  She needed an ear and her Mom provided one – a big and open one.  It had been a long road to get to this point.  Taryn never thought of her Mother as another human being with patience and sage advice.  Mrs. Wright listened as her Daughter spilled out regrets and questions that she had bottled up for the better part of a year.

They spoke for hours.  There was so much that Taryn had never shared with her Mom.  Mrs. Wright did not know what happened with Devon.  She had questions about his motives she would have shared with her daughter had she been included in the conversation.  She never heard things about Taryn's crush on some young man from the library or her close friend Tim.  They could have laughed and cried together but no communication existed between them.

“My dear Taryn, you never really knew how much I loved you.  I’m sorry sweetheart.  I was afraid to show any vulnerabilities to you and your brother.  If you thought I was perfect you would not see that inside I’m just a human with flaws.  I was so scared of not being good enough for you kids.”

“You are perfect because you are our Mom.  All I wanted was to know you – not some robot who knew how to set one hell of a table.  It’s o.k. to spill a little.  That is what we are for.  You can rely on us to clean up.  Everyone is going to spill now and then.”

“I can only try Taryn.”

“That’s all I’m asking.”

“But Sweetie, Don’t ask me to drive with the top down anytime soon.” 

They spent the day together, just the two of them.  Jen would be o.k. She needed help and she was receiving it.  Taryn, Beth and her family could only offer support and lead her back to her healthy self.

****

Kyle was back at school after a week in Buffalo where he enjoyed a much needed rest.  He was living off campus for a couple of weeks.  Games started up again in a couple of weeks.  In the meantime he was busy with practice and happy to be free of lectures until early February.

He had secured an internship at Blitz, an ad agency in New York for the summer so the springtime would be worry free after another mediocre season of hockey.  He had gotten a lot of help from College Hockey, Inc. which was increasing a college player’s chances of being considered by AHL and NHL teams.  Kyle was on the small side but he stood out for his speed and tenacity.

“Con, a bunch of the guys are going to hit the ice at around noon if you can get your sorry ass out of bed.”

“I’ll be there Caldwell.  I might be a little late.  It’s nothing official called by Coach is it?”