If I Had You (Christmas In Harper Falls) (6 page)

“Look.”

“If you insist.”

Normally, Sam’s exaggerated leer, the way he wiggled his eyebrows,
would make her laugh. Right now, she couldn’t summon up even the weakest of
smiles.

“No, Sam. Really look. I’m red. Top to bottom. Like an
over-boiled lobster.”

Sam laughed, garnering a horrified look from Lila. When she
tried to cover up again, he stopped her.

“Lila.” Sam lifted her chin. “Look at me.
Please.”

When she did, Sam could see the hurt and embarrassment. He
felt a little squeeze around his heart. Sympathy and something deeper. Oh boy.
He might be in trouble.

“I wasn’t laughing at you.”

“Why not? I look like a clown.”

“I hate clowns. Wouldn’t be close to one for anything.
You, on the other hand. There is no place I would rather be.”

“Right.” Lila was not convinced.

“You gave me an out. Did I take it?”

“No. But—”

“I laughed because the idea of me ever finding you
anything but hot and sexy is ridiculous.”

Sam ran a finger across the bridge of her nose. He lightly
caressed her cheek.

“I noticed your blush.”

“You’d have to be blind not to,” Lila snorted.

He ignored her.

“I watched as it tinged the top of your chest,”
his fingers followed the path of his words. “Moved to your breasts.
Spectacular, by the way. I practically salivated to see if it would reach these
wonderfully hard tips.”

Without warning, Sam bent to kiss her nipple, his tongue bathing
the end with an all too brief taste.

A moan slipped from Lila’s mouth.

“You covered up before I found out and now the color
has receded,” Sam said, disappointed. “Did it get this far? Tell me
it did.”

“Yes.”

Lila breathed the word, her embarrassment fading faster than
her blushes. Sam’s touch sent sparks flying through her body. The blood rushed
from the surface of her skin, moving like molten lava through her veins. She
felt an insistent throb between her legs

“Mmm.” Sam licked his lips. “I’m sorry I
missed that.”

“It’s splotchy, not sexy.”

“You should let me be the judge of sexy, Lila.”
Sam’s kiss left them both breathless. “Remember, I’m the expert.”

Remember? Lila was close to forgetting her own name. Sam
kissed her again, his lips firm, commanding. She let him take charge, lead her
into a sensual world she knew existed but thought she would never be allowed to
enter. Sam was the key. He threw open the door. No. More like smashed it to
bits. With his battering ram.

Lila giggled. Battering ram. Where had that come from?

“I like that sound. Want to share?”

“I thought of another penis euphemism.”

When she told him, Sam laughed so hard he fell back on the
mattress, taking Lila with him. He rolled until she was on top, her lovely breasts
pressing into his chest. His hands cupped her butt, aligning her just so, and
then sat up. Lila’s legs automatically circled his hips. The position was
perfect.

“My
battering ram
can feel your…What should we
call it?”

“Honeypot?”

“Stop,” Sam said, laughing uncontrollably.
“All this hilarity is causing friction. It feels amazing. Too amazing. I
don’t want to embarrass myself all over your stomach.”

“If that really is a possibility.”

“Considering I’ve been on edge from the moment I met
you? Oh, yeah.” Sam leaned back. “Now you’re blushing again.”

“It’s a curse.”

“I can see how it would be annoying,” Sam
conceded. “It makes me want to kiss every inch of your pinkening skin.
Follow the path as it spreads up and down your luscious body. Then follow back
as it slowly fades. I’m going to find ways to make you blush just so I can
enjoy the journey.”

“Thank you,” Lila said softly. She gave Sam the
gentlest of kisses.

“I’m serious.”

“I know.” This time her kiss was deeper.
“Thank you.”

They stayed that way, looking deep into each other’s eyes.
Something passed between them in those moments. Deeper than mere attraction.
Stronger than lust.

“I want you. Inside me.” Lila whispered the words
against his mouth. “Can you reach the table by the bed? In the
drawer?”

Keeping one arm firmly around her waist, Sam blindly
searched. His hand hit the drawer handle, and then he rummaged around inside.
When his fingers brushed a familiar foil packet, he smiled against her lips.

“Are you sure this is my size?”

Lila looked at the package, then swiveled her hips,
measuring.

“I’ll admit when I bought those yesterday, I was using
a bit of wishful thinking.” She moved again, smiling. “I’d say I was
right on the money. Lucky me.”

“Size does matter?” Sam asked, expertly rolling on
the condom.

“The user matters,” Lila qualified, reaching for
him — measuring. “Size is a bonus.”

“How do you know…?” Sam swallowed. Lila’s hand was
making pre-coital teasing banter more and more difficult. “You seem
certain I know what I’m doing.”

“Reputation.” Lila breath hissed between her
teeth. Sam’s magic fingers were probing between her legs. “You have a good
one. Rose confirmed.”

Wet, Sam thought with satisfaction. He ran two fingers along
her opening. Wet and ready.

“How would Rose know?”

“What?” Her brain was turning to mush. “Stop
talking, start —”

Lila almost jumped off the bed, Sam’s strong arm around her
waist the only thing keeping her mattress-bound. What was he doing? Magic
fingers? More like unreal. Beyond talented.

“Tell me what Rose said.”

“Now?”

“I could stop.”

“No!” Was he kidding? “Inside me, please.
Then I promise. I will tell you whatever you want to know.”

Sounded like a win-win to him. Sam gripped the sides of
Lila’s hips, lifting her.

“Take my cock. That’s right. You know the rest.”

Sam took a deep, calming breath. It took an eternity for
Lila to position him. He couldn’t tell if she was deliberately torturing him or
just a little inexperienced at the process. The look of deep concentration on
her face made him think the latter. Okay, he could do this. Let her take her
time.

His brain searched for the most unpleasant things possible.
Anything to keep his mind off her hand on his dick. Let’s see. Landfills,
curdled milk, Donald Trump. That helped.

“There,” Lila said triumphantly.

“Perfect, honey. Take me at your own pace. Don’t rush.
Slow, easy.”

Buoyed by his soft, encouraging tone, Lila used Sam’s
shoulders to steady herself. The feeling of being in control smoothed out the
rest of her nerves. This was what she needed, where she wanted to be. Following
his advice, she took him in a bit at a time. Part of her wanted to hurry, get
to the good part. Her body knew this was good. Why rush through something that
felt close to heaven? She planned on getting there; first, she wanted to savor the
journey.

“There,” Sam sighed with relief. It hadn’t been
easy; he gritted his teeth the entire time. Lila’s look of accomplishment made
it worth it.

“Should I move?”

Sam lifted both hands, cupping her head. His kiss was
thorough, letting her know with his tongue what he would soon be doing with his
cock.

“Soon.”

Sam laughed at her look of frustration.
Trust me
, he
wanted to assure her. I
know how you feel
. It was tempting to grab her
hips, thrust himself up again. To end this. To fill the aching need he knew was
shared by them both. For some reason, he wanted it to last as long as possible.
It didn’t matter that they had all night. He could take her again and again.
This was the first time. Four, five, six more times. What he did
this
time
more than any other was how she would remember him. He planned to make it
something no other man would ever be able to equal.

“Tell me about your conversation with Rose.”

“It would serve you right if I refused.”

“Then we both would lose.”

Sam cupped her breasts, sighing with happiness. A soft,
firm, perfect handful. He rubbed her nipples with his thumbs, causing her to
squirm, lifting slightly, and then coming down again on his rock hard erection.

“Careful,” he warned, taking a nipple into his
mouth. He bit causing her to jump with surprise, not pain.

“Like that?”

“You know I do.”

“Then tell me what Rose said and I’ll do it
again.”

Lila growled with frustration. She could tell he was
serious. He wanted to talk about Rose while they were… He wanted to talk about
Rose.

“Are you hung up on her?”

Sam was busy watching his hands on Lila’s breasts. The
weight, the way her nipple felt on his palms when he ran them over the hard
bud. How dark his tanned skin looked next to the milky whiteness of hers.

“Who? Rose? Why on earth would you think that?”

“You seem awfully interested in what she had to say
about you.”

Sam’s hips thrust up, ever so slightly.

“Don’t,” Lila moaned. “Not until you
answer.”

“Rose is getting an awful lot of play.”

“My thoughts exactly.”

“Fine.”

Sam kept his hands on her breasts but raised his eyes to
hers. A lot wary, a little turned on. Time to cut the wary altogether. The
turned on would grow from there.

“Rose is a beautiful, desirable woman. I invited her to
my bed on several occasions. She turned me down flat every time.” He kept
his gaze steady, easy to read. “I wasn’t offended or obsessed. I like her.
I’m curious to know if she talked me up or warned you to steer clear.”

Believing him, Lila relaxed and smiled.

“Both. The warning came first. When she realized I
couldn’t be dissuaded, she confirmed the rumors.”

“Which are?”

“Come on, Sam. You know what women say about you. Great
in bed, generous. Guaranteed orgasms.”

Sam was about to say more when Lila moved again. The rest of
the conversation could wait. She was expecting an orgasm? It was past time he
delivered.

He moved his hands to her hips, his mouth latching onto one
of those oh so tempting breasts.

“Sam,” Lila cried out, half pleasure, half
protest. “I wanted to know about your reputation.”

“Time for show, not tell, Lila.”

There it was
, Sam thought. Her eyes turned liquid
gold. Close. They both were. Too much time teasing and talking. He urged her to
meet his hips with hers.

“Come with me, Lila.”

Sam reached between them, finding the spot that would send
her over. There. He heard the change in her breathing, felt her muscles clench
around him. Throwing his head back, he shouted her name. A second later, she
joined him, his name on her lips.

Movements slowing, milking the last bit of sensation for
them both, Sam kissed Lila. Long, slow. The desperation over, he gave her
tenderness, holding her close when she collapsed into his arms.

Sam ran a soothing hand up and down Lila’s back. How many
times had he held a woman just like this? Waited as their heartbeat slowed back
to normal? More than he would count. The pleasure blurred as did the faces.

That was how Sam knew. This was different. Lila was
different. When he left her bed, she wouldn’t become one of many. He’d wanted
to make sure she remembered. Now he was caught in a trap of his own making. Not
only would he never forget Lila Fleming, he didn’t want to.

“YOU SHOULD HAVE told me.”

“I wouldn’t be telling you now if you hadn’t gone all
crazy protective brother the second Lila didn’t answer her phone.”

“Do I have to remind you of all the shit that’s gone
down lately?” Alex asked. He tried to keep his voice down to a low roar.
He wasn’t succeeding.

“Of course not.”

“Then how is it overreacting when my sister is
AWOL?”

“Listen to yourself,” Dani said. “This isn’t
the Army and your sister isn’t one of your wayward recruits. She’s a grown
woman who has the right to a little privacy.”

“With that, that…” Alex searched for the perfect
word. “Reprobate?”

“Good word,” Dani admitted, and then got back to
the argument. “She’s fine. Lila has spent the night with other men. I
don’t recall you threatening bodily harm to them.”

“That’s because I didn’t know about it until after the
fact.” Alex looked at the clock by their bed. “One in the morning. As
we speak, they might be,” Alex swallowed, “you know.”

“I tell you what.”

Dani reached over, taking his phone from his tense fingers.
She dropped it into the drawer on her side of the bed.

“Instead of worrying about Lila, why don’t you show me what
people do at this time of the night?”

She kissed him, her hand slipping under the covers.

“Very nice,” she said, feeling the length of his
growing erection.

“I’m going over there first thing in the morning.”

“Mmm,” Dani placated with several more kisses.
“Maybe wait until ten.”

Alex moved his head to the side, giving Dani better access.

“Nine.”

Dani smiled. Lifting the covers, she paused, her mouth
inches from taking him inside. One swipe of her tongue, his accompanying moan,
and she knew she had him. Lila’s privacy was safe from her brother’s protective
prying. And she was in for a very pleasurable night.

LILA WHISTLED HER way through her morning work. She was happy.
Giddy. And why not? Hours of sexual bliss in the arms of a man who looked like
he stepped off the cover of GQ was funny, kind, sweet. There were almost as
many laughs as orgasms. And a few tears. They exchanged growing up stories.
Telling Sam about the death of her parents was difficult yet surprisingly
cathartic. She didn’t talk about that time to many people. Her brother — Dani.
Rose, and Tyler knew. A close circle of friends. Now Sam.

Lila cried a little. Then he asked her about the good times.
No one did that. They always expressed sympathy then moved on from the difficult
subject. Sam gave her a chance to remember her parents in the best possible
way. Happy — alive. A weight she hadn’t been aware of lifted. She felt lighter.
Sam gave her that. She gave him another piece of her heart.

Sam proved to be full of all kinds of surprises. He woke her
with his mouth. Oral sex had always been a mystery to Lila. She didn’t like
giving; she never got any pleasure receiving. Until now.

At first, Lila thought she was having the hottest sex dream
ever. Sam, doing wicked things to her with his mouth. For the first time, she
enjoyed having a man down there. No embarrassment, no awkward tap on the head
saying nice try, no cigar. This time, everything was working. His tongue and
fingers were in perfect sync, bringing her immeasurable pleasure.

“I’m dreaming,” she moaned.

“Me too,” a voice answered. “Only in a dream
could a woman be so pretty
and
taste like nectar from the gods.”

Lila’s eyes popped open, a gasp on her lips.
Not a dream.
Sam was… Holy crap. She tried to sit up, move away. The lack of embarrassment
her dream provided came rushing in, full force.

“Sam, you have to stop.”

“I will,” he said, holding her hips steady so she
couldn’t get away. “Give me another five, ten minutes and I promise to
stop.”

“But…” Lila moaned, louder than in her dream. Or
non-dream. “I don’t like that. I mean, I’ve never gotten any pleasure…What
are you doing?”

“Enjoying my pre-breakfast snack.”

Lila was too far gone to protest. She laid down, shutting
off her mind. The fingers spread through his thick, soft hair, pulling him
closer, urging him on. It didn’t take even close to five minutes for her to
reach that elusive oral sex peak.

When Lila finally became aware of her surroundings, she
slowly opened her eyes.

“Sam.”

“Mmm.”

“Why are you still down there?” She tried to close
her legs without any success. Sam’s shoulders made it impossible.

“I like the view.” His bright blue eyes traveled
up her body then back down again. “Beautiful. Too many men don’t take the
time to enjoy every angle of a woman’s body.”

“You’ve seen it all before.”

“Every woman is different, Lila,” Sam explained,
his hand sliding up her stomach over her ribs until he cupped her breast.

“Not
that
different.”

“Wrong. The differences are infinite.”

Sam scooted up, taking her in his arms.

“Do you know what it takes to be a good lover?”

“Amazing hands, fantastic cock, and talented
tongue?”

“No,” Sam chuckled. “Though that all helps.
Technique is great, I’m all for it.”

“Love the technique, big fan.”

“Smartass.”

“Hey, I’m serious.”

“Then let me enlighten you, Grasshopper.” Sam
laced his fingers with Lila’s. He liked the connection. “The secret, after
learning the basics, is caring about your partner. When I’m with a woman, my
pleasure is magnified when she is enjoying it as much as I am.”

“That myth is smashed to bits.”

“What myth?”

“The one that says good looking men are often terrible
lovers because they don’t have to try. Women fall at their feet.” Lila
cupped Sam’s face giving him a long, deep kiss. “You aren’t supposed to
care if I have fun, as long as you do.”

“I thought we established my well-earned reputation as
an orgasm machine,” Sam joked.

“True,” Lila conceded, her eyes twinkling.
“You can be the exception to the rule.”

“Unique?”

“You like that?”

Sam turned his head and shrugged.

“I’ve never wanted to be one among many.” Sam
turned, pushing Lila onto her back. “In the bedroom, my motto is quality
and
quantity.”

“Nope.”

Lila pushed back. She knew Sam let her, happy to allow her
to spread her wings a little and take control.

This time it was Lila who gave Sam’s body a long,
appreciative once over.

“Well?”

“You’ll do.”

The truth was Lila didn’t know how she wound up in bed with
the hottest man on the planet. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, she
decided not to worry about it — just enjoy.

Part of the fun was finding out she wasn’t as vanilla in bed
as she always thought. Man on top, woman on bottom.
Boring.
Suddenly, in
one night she found herself doing things, having things done to her, she only
read about in books. Giving a man a blowjob might not be blindingly original.
Or new. But this time, like when he went down on her, she planned to enjoy it.

“Grab the headboard, Sam. I’m about to
blow
your
mind.”

Now, Lila checked her watch, two short hours later, she could
officially say blowjobs were awesome. With the right man.

Lila felt her happiness wane, just a bit. Sam. He was the
right man. The man who would walk out of her life today. When she told her
friends that her heart couldn’t be broken in one day, Lila was right. Not
broken — just severely cracked.

“I told you, the cyber campaign needs to be pushed out
before the first of the year. I don’t care if you’re visiting your family.
That’s why we have computers. Get your ass in gear or you won’t have a job to come
back to.”

Lila’s eyes widened. Whomever Sam was talking to, was
getting a royal reaming out. If they weren’t shaking in their boots, they
weren’t human.

The mostly one-sided conversation continued in the same vein
for several more minutes. Sam’s voice getting louder, his language increasingly
colorful.

“Hi.”

Sam came down the stairs, his hair still damp from his
shower. The smile on his face, open, affectionate, showed a completely
different man than the one she overheard. This was the Sam she welcomed to her
bed. Deep down, Lila knew they were one and the same. That made him what?
An
intimate stranger
? A disconcerting thought.

“Is something wrong?”

Sam crossed the room, his arms wrapping around her waist. He
gave her the sweetest kiss.
Okay
, she thought,
back to Dr. Jekyll.
He must
have left Mr. Hyde upstairs.

“No.”

“Yes.” Sam tipped her chin up, his eyes concerned.
“You look worried.”

“You aren’t really going to fire that poor person, are
you?”

“What person?” Sam frowned. He looked up at the
staircase, the light dawning. “You heard that.”

“I think all of Harper Falls heard that. You were very…
vocal.”

“Business.”

“
Business
? Is that usual?” she asked
warily. “I would hesitate to do business with anyone who talked to me like
that.”

“I wouldn’t blame you.” Sam sighed, briefly
resting his forehead on hers. When he straightened, his expression was rueful.

“I was talking to Malcolm, my assistant in New York. He
had clear, concise instructions. Things that needed to be done before he left
for his Christmas holiday.”

“I take it Malcolm screwed up.”

“He did. I’m in a very fickle business, Lila. What’s
hot this week is easily forgotten the next. If I say something needs doing, it
doesn’t mean next week; it meant yesterday.”

“
Are
you going to fire him?”

“Not this time.” Sighing, Sam pulled her in tight,
his hands giving her back a soothing rub. “Contrary to what some might
tell you, I’m not unreasonable. I hold my employees up to the same standards I
expect from myself. If they’re just learning, like Malcolm, they get some
slack.”

“Just enough to hang themselves?”

“Smartass,” Sam chuckled. “No, enough to
learn. Malcolm is on strike two. He’s been with me for almost a year, Lila. He
knows how I work. He’s watched me fire people who wouldn’t get with the
program.”

Lila pushed out of Sam’s embrace. He couldn’t read her
expression. Was she that upset by what she had overheard?

“Lila, like I said, it’s business. I have no problem
shutting it off the rest of the time.”

“I know,” Lila assured him. “I’m
embarrassed.”

“Why?”

“Because
your
business is none of mine.”
She shrugged. “I was startled by what I heard, that’s all. I wasn’t
thinking. I remember Rose once telling me that you could be a trifle… intense
about your work.”

“Did she?”

Sam smiled. A
trifle
intense? He remembered being a
damn hard-ass. He pushed Rose, never letting up. It was his way; he didn’t know
any other. She wasn’t intimidated. She didn’t blink. In fact, she gave as good
as she got. Turned out to be one of the best experiences of his professional
life.

“It doesn’t matter, Sam.”

“But…”

“Honestly.” Lila kissed his cheek, then lingered
on his mouth. “You’re leaving in a few hours. Let’s not talk about your
work.”

“About that.”

“Your work?”

“No,” Sam said. He took a deep breath, suddenly
less sure. “I want to stay. The rest of the week.”

“You do?”

Sam understood the surprise he saw on Lila’s face. He felt
the same. He took his shower, mentally going over his schedule. Los Angeles for
the next few days, a stopover in New York. Paris in time for the New Year. Then
he thought of Lila. What would she be doing at midnight on the thirty-first?
Who would she be with? Who would she kiss as the clock struck twelve?

It didn’t take long for him to figure that one out. She
should kiss him.

Why not? He could rearrange meetings. His plans for New
Year’s Eve were tentative. Several invitations, nothing set in stone.

As Sam rinsed Lila’s shampoo from his hair, the scent of her
filling the room, he made up his mind. Until now, he hadn’t thought about
Lila’s reaction. Maybe she wouldn’t want him to stay. One night might be all
she wanted.

“I don’t want to push myself on you, Lila. I want to
stay; if you’ll have me.”

Lila didn’t know what to say. She left her bed this morning
prepared to say goodbye. Resigned. Sam was never meant to be more than one
wonderful night. A memory to savor. Suddenly, he offered her a few more days.

Her first impulse was to shout,
YES!
She would take
as much of him as she could get. As she opened her mouth to do just that, the
words wouldn’t come out. By nature, Lila was not an impulsive person. She
thought things through. The longer she thought, the more she knew this was a
bad idea.

Her heart was already hovering between like and love.
Another week with Sam was bound to cement her firmly on the side of love. If
she let him walk away now, no harm done. A tinge of regret, that’s all. If he
stayed, she faced a broken heart for the New Year.

Tell him no
, her rational side urged.
No, no, no,
no, no.

Lila looked up at Sam. Sweet, sexy, complicated Sam. In the
end, there was only one thing she could say.

“Yes.”

“YOU SAID HE was leaving today.”

“That’s what I understood, Alex.” Dani exchanged
eye rolls with Rose. “I’m not responsible for Sam Laughton changing his
plans.”

“One night,” Alex grumbled. He gave Jack an accusatory
look. “What is it with one-night stands? No one honors them anymore?”

“If you’re referring to my one-night stand with Rose
—”

“Exactly,” Alex exclaimed. “She asked for
something very specific. One night, no strings attached. Simple. Traditional.
Jack screwed all that up by refusing to give her what she wanted.”

“Traditional?” Rose almost choked on her sweet
roll. “What is traditional about non-committal sex? And may I remind you,
he did give me what I wanted — eventually. My one-night stand turned into
forever.” She laid her hand on Jack’s, the ring he placed there shining
bright. “No complaints here.”

“Sam Laughton isn’t sticking around Harper Falls. No
happily ever after for Lila.”

The friends were meeting for a post-Christmas breakfast at Harper
Falls newest eatery.
Let Them Eat Croissants
followed in the footsteps
of other businesses in town. The cuter and punnier, the better. This French
patisserie was sandwiched between
Eye Saw You Coming,
an optometrist and
Take Me Out To
The Ball Gown
, a shop specializing in formal wear.

Alex was five minutes into his rant, the hot coffee in front
of him going cold, his chocolate croissant forgotten. Jack, believing in waste
not want not, snatched the roll from his friend’s plate, taking a hearty bite.

“There is an age-old covenant,” Alex grumbled.
“One night means one night.”

“Where is that written?” Drew asked. He slapped
Tyler’s hand when she tried purloining his coffee. “Patience, Ty. The
waitress is making the rounds. You can wait thirty seconds for a refill.”

Tyler wasn’t sure. She needed her morning caffeine. One cup,
delicious as it was, didn’t cut it. She gave Drew her sweetest
please
smile.

“Fine,” Drew sighed. What could he do? He loved
this woman. Feeding her addiction came with the territory. He pushed his cup in
front of her. His reward? A big, enthusiastic kiss. Who needed coffee? Tyler
was enough to jump-start
his
day.

“What is wrong with all of you,” Alex demanded.
“My sister is in the clutches of a world-famous letch. You’re calmly eating
pastry and arguing over coffee.”