Immortal Dreams (69 page)

I keep smiling at him, and I can't help it.  Clara's going to kick my ass when she watches her wedding video.

Suddenly everyone's moving back down the aisle, and I realize I'm holding things up. 
Oh shit
.

I almost stumble off the steps of the altar that Henry had custom built just for Clara's picky tastes.

As soon as I reach the back, Devin is freeing me from the reluctant grasp of Jerry.  His lips devour mine as though he's been waiting days instead of an hour to do that.  I smile like a goofy teen behind the delicious kiss.

"You're not supposed to distract attention from the bride.  She should have chosen a different dress for you," he murmurs softly.

I see Jerry rolling his eyes as he darts on by.  I giggle a little as I stand on my tiptoes, and he bends to kiss me once more.

"I was wondering if you maybe you wanted to dance?"

He smiles at my deliberately bumbling question to exactly mimic the first question I ever asked him.

"I find that a very enticing proposition," he growls menacingly.

I smirk a little as I stretch my arms up around his neck.

"I like your answer much better this time," I seduce.

"I know what's at stake this time," he whispers before closing his mouth over mine.

When he pulls back, we walk into the loud reception hall that is already celebrating the union of my best friend and her new hubby.

I feel my body suddenly swaying slowly to the fast song that's playing, and I block out every bit of the chaos going on around me.  I pull back slightly, and see a devilish smirk daring me to bring this heat to the next level.

I just roll my eyes at his insinuated suggestion.

"Behave.  Clara is going to kill me for smiling like a fool and staring at you the whole wedding as it is."

He bounces his eyebrows up and down mischievously.  I can feel the heat inside of me growing, burning, and desperately begging to be set free.  I feel a little dizzy, and I stagger slightly in his arms.

He holds on to me to halt the impending fall, and concern cloaks his face.

"What's wrong?"

I force a smile, though all I want to do is lie down and go to sleep.

"I think it's the altitude.  I'm not use to high heels," I joke.

He doesn't crack a grin though.  He keeps his eyes intensely focused on mine, and he starts shaking his head.

"I think I'm starting to have a toxic effect on you," he mutters too seriously with sincere guilt etching his exquisitely chiseled face.

"Don't be ridiculous.  I've probably just eaten something that didn't like me as much as I liked it.”

He kisses me lightly and pulls my head to his chest.  He's getting distant again.  Surely he doesn't really think he's doing something to me.  I don't want him to leave me.  Why do I feel so desperate to be with a man I barely know?

I wake up to a cold
bed, my hands scouring around the vacant space and searching for the missing warmth I want to snuggle into.  I sit straight up when I realize I'm alone, and I flip on the bedside lamp in my apartment.

My heart drops when there's a note on the pillow next to me instead of the man I expected to see.  I feel pissed, worried, and sick when I open it up and read it.

Adisia,

I'm sorry, but I had to go back to New York to deal with an unexpected issue.  I hope you don't find yourself cross with me, but it was necessary.  I'm sorry I didn't wake you, but you were so peaceful.  I'll see you later.

Devin

Cross?  Who the hell uses that word in that context anymore?

I'm not cross, I'm fucking pissed.  There wasn't an unexpected issue; he's just done exactly what I knew he'd do.

Ben and Jerry's here I frigging come.

Maybe I'm overreacting.  Maybe there really was an issue.

I climb out of bed and see it's barely six in the morning.  My eyes flash over to the window showing the sun barely in rise.  It's almost depressing to see the new day starting while I'm alone.

I walk quietly into the bathroom and turn on the shower to wash away my tension.  I'm so pissed right now I actually feel hot.

The water attempts to cheer me up with its warm, inviting flow, and I try to drown myself in the refreshing sensation splashing against me.

My shower is invaded again, and I scream as the water bubbles in its boiling form once more.  The shower curtain rod clanks to the ground as I charge out with hasty retreat.  But the heat from the shower disappears as soon as I'm out.

Stupid hot water heater
.  I swear.

I shut the malfunctioning abomination off and start getting ready for work.  I check my phone, but there's nothing from Devin.  The screen tries to show me pity, so I toss it face down on the bed as I head to the closet.

"Adisia." The receptionist beams as
she rushes toward me with a bouquet of a dozen roses.

"Mine?"

My anxiety flees slightly to make room for the excited butterflies filling my stomach.  The last time he sent me roses I got to go see him.  These are much smaller than the last decadent bouquet he sent me that are still proudly displayed on my desk.

I eagerly open the card, and my excitement instantly fades to dread as the tears of disappointment threaten to pour.  I read the card in disgust.

Adisia,

I wanted you to know I'm so sorry about everything.  Please give me another chance.  I love you, and I always will.

Jerry

Ugh!  Of all the nerve.  I hand the roses back to Jane as I scowl.

"Here.  You can have them," I utter in a loathsome manner as my nose wrinkles up to further accentuate the sour taste left in my mouth.

"Really?  You don't want them?"

"Really.  I don't want anything to do with the sender.  They're from Jerry."

"Oh," she says with an understanding tone, her eyes looking down to the puny bouquet.

"I'm going to take an early lunch.  Forward any calls for me to my cell phone, please," I huff out.

I can't stay here right now.  That was the last drop of disappointment I could stomach in front of everyone here.  I need some air.

"No problem."

I throw my purse over my shoulder and tuck my wounded heart back into my sleeve as I head out the door.  It's amazing he went from saying he was obsessed with me to not wanting to speak to me at all.

I check my phone for the hundredth time to see nothing but my screensaver.  I've left him two voicemails, and still he's ignoring me.  I think that's all the desperation I'm willing to spoon out.

A guy stares at me so hard while he's passing by that he walks into a car that is parked on the curb.

O...kay... that was weird.

I cross my arms in front of my chest, and then I watch another guy walk into a tree right in front of me.  He crashes to the ground after being instantly halted by the unrelenting force planted in the ground.

His gaping eyes were glued to me.  He was staring at me so hard he never saw it coming.

Sheesh
.  This shirt isn't that low. 
Pervert
.

I walk a little farther to see another guy staring at me.  He doesn't even attempt to be subtle.  I actually feel like I need a shower.  I'm starting to wonder if I stink or something.  Maybe there's something on my face

Oh no
.  I had a biscuit this morning.  I bet there's jelly on me, and no one from work bothered to warn me.

I stop to use the reflective surface of a shop window as a mirror, but I don't see anything other than a guy splattering into the door while holding his coffee as he stares at me.  The coffee cup bursts against his chest, and he dances to escape the scalding clutches of the spilled brew.

Others from inside the shop stare at me through the streaked mess left behind, and I dart away to escape their gaze.

Has everyone lost their minds today?  Perhaps I should ride to New York right now.  I'm apparently having a pretty good hair day or something.

Oh no.  I see Bret.  I hate Bret.  Yet another guy I was with who cheated on me after asking me to move in with him.

I try to find somewhere to disappear to as he jogs toward me.  The second his eyes meet mine, he falls in a flipping motion until he thuds against the ground.

Him too?  Wow.  Something has to be in the air.

"You okay?" I ask without a trace of authentic sympathy, a ha-ha tone lacing my words.

"Wow!  What happened to you?" he asks as he climbs to his feet while dusting himself off.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... wow.  Have you always been this hot?"

"Um... I think you must have hit your head pretty hard.  You might need to go to the doctor," I say with a little concern, trying to see if he's bruising.

"No.  I'm not the only one looking at you," he says as though he's in a trance while pointing behind me.

I follow his direction to see an array of men staring helplessly at me - like I'm some sort of movie star.

I'm officially freaked out.

I almost sprint away - passing numerous other exes along the way.  I've dated way too many guys in this town.  I've never felt like such a slut.

I almost dive into the office doors, and I slump down in my seat after I close the blinds to the outside.  I've apparently taken a wrong turn somewhere and crossed into another dimension.

Crazy sons of bitches.

My phone buzzes, and I juggle it frantically when I try to answer.  I don't even check it before I connect with the person on the other end.

"Devin?" I ask hopefully.

"No.  It's Cal.  I just saw you in front of the coffee shop.  I was wondering if you have any plans tonight?"

Oh good grief.  What is this?

"Sorry, Cal.  You need to go home to the blond bimbo you left me for and forget about me because it isn't happening."

"But I-"

I hang up before he protests, and then my phone buzzes again.  I look down at the unfamiliar number, and I cringe slightly before I answer.

"Hello?"

"Hey, babe," Devin's smooth, irresistible voice coos.

I fall out of my chair with a loud boom.  Everyone around me quickly tosses their curiosity my way, and I blush feverishly while jumping back up to my feet.

It's him!  Everything is okay.  I was just overreacting.

My heart flops into my mouth, and then it rushes back down to pound ferociously against my chest.

"Hey," I squeak very immaturely, and then I clear my throat before continuing more respectably.  "Why did you just take off?"

"Sorry about that.  I had to get home and take care of some stuff.  I know this is very cowardly of me, but..."

He just stops speaking as though I'm supposed to finish his sentence for him.  The silence left on the line sends tension seeping through my pores.  I feel sick.  There shouldn't be a "but."  I hate
buts
.

"But what?" I prompt, instantly regretting having rushed him.

"Adisia, I don't think we should see each other anymore.  At least... not for a while."

My heart shatters to the floor when it gets blown to smithereens by the bomb he just dropped.  His weighted words leave a throbbing ring in my ears as I try to fathom what's just been said.

"What?" I ask dryly, my whole body physically trying to draw up in the same tight knot my insides feel.

"I can't explain this to you in a way you'll understand, and I'm so sorry, but I don't think it's a good idea for you to get mixed up with me."

I slowly swallow against the huge knot invading my throat just as Jane squeals.

"Adisia.  You've got five bouquets of roses waiting up front for you, and the flower shop called to say there's a delivery van on the way."

I brush my cheek free from the tear that has crept out, and then I turn to face her with my watery eyes.

"Tell them to stop sending them, please.  Throw them all away or keep them for yourself.  Here, you can have these too."

I hand her the three dozen roses Devin had sent to me, and she stares at me with a puzzled glare.

“But you love these."

"I don’t ever want to see them again," I whisper, so as not to let him hear what's going on.

I turn my attention back to the phone, and take a deep breath to steady my wavering tone as Jane rushes back to answer the annoying buzzer at the front desk.

"What's going on there?" he asks before I can say anything else.

"Nothing.  I'll let you go.  Apparently you've thought this through.  You ran out in the middle of the night like a pathetic coward, you've avoided my calls, and you call me at work to deliver the final devastating blow.  You want out, you got it.  Don't bother calling when you change your mind.  I don't do second chances; no more exceptions."

"Adisia-"

I hang up before he tries to tell me his ridiculous reasons for breaking me the way he promised he never would.  I don't know him.  I shouldn't feel so hurt.  I feel worse right now than I did when I found Jerry cheating on me.  I feel worse than I did when all my other relationships combined fell apart.

I barely know him.  It shouldn't hurt this frigging bad.  My heavy chest feels like it's going to explode right now, and my lungs are praying for a breath to find their grasp.

I invited the devil into my home, into my bed, and into my life, knowing he was going to rip me to shreds when I least expected it.

I lean over into my small cubicle trashcan and expel the contents of my stomach.  I wipe my mouth and roll my eyes while groaning in disgust, as a few others gag back their own desire to share in my distasteful display.

How embarrassing
.

I pick up my desk phone and hit the button for the front desk.

"Hello?" Jane asks.

"If Charlene asks, I'm taking a sick day for the rest of the week.  If she wants to fire me, then fine," I grumble, another tear slipping free amidst my words.

"Adisia?  Are you okay?"

I can feel the tears starting to pour now.  I wish she hadn't asked me that.  Never ask a girl on the verge of tears if they're okay.

"No.  I have to go now."

I jump up and take the back door to escape any eyes that might spy my crying.  I bypass store after store with my head hanging low, as if I'm the town outcast instead of the brokenhearted girl shredded at the hands of Devin Cole.