Imperfections (26 page)

She's right about that; no matter how much I wanted her, my conscience was killing me for even thinking about her that way.

"I don't want you orchestrating any more meetings between them. He's not good for her. I know things about Matt that wouldn't be good for her."

"No more meetings with Matt. But I can't stop her from hanging out with him if she wants to."

"You can't, but I don't need you making this more difficult than it already is." I walk back into the living room and sit back down.

"I wasn't expecting you to be this calm after you called me and ordered me over here. What's changed since yesterday? Maybe you weren't as angry as I thought you were."

"Oh, believe me, I was angry after I found out what happened with Matt in that club and Cat leaving like that. After I called you, I worked out for two hours before I could calm down."

"What happened with Matt and Cat?"

"I'm sure you already know, Ava. If you don't want me to get worked up again, let's not talk about it. That's something for Cat and I to talk about when I can talk about it without seeing red."

She holds her hands up to me. "You don't have to tell me twice. I'm going to leave that talk to you and Cat."

I need to talk to someone about what happened today and Ava's the only one I can talk to. "Ava, I'm going to trust that you won't tell Cat what I'm about to say."

"Okay."

"I mean it, Ava, she already has enough reasons not to be with me."

"I know she does. To be honest, Nick, if I were her I wouldn't give your ass a second thought. Imagine, you have all this stuff to deal with before you even start the relationship."

"I know. You don't need to remind me. I was at the doctor's office today with Kate."

"Really, how did that go?"

"I saw the baby and heard the heartbeat. Hearing and seeing this little thing made it real. I realized this child could very well be mine."

"Yours and Kate's."

"I can't deny that anymore."

"So you're saying that you think this baby is yours?"

"I'm saying, before, it wasn't real to me, it was in the abstract. I couldn't touch it, I couldn't see it, I couldn't hear it. Today, for the first time since Kate told me she was pregnant, it wasn't something we just talked about, I could see it, and I could hear it. Seeing that little thing on the monitor and hearing that heartbeat changed things. It made me feel something that I didn't feel before I stepped into that exam room."

"That's a problem now, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is. One more thing to hurt Cat, pulling her away from me."

"Cat stands to lose a lot more than you if you convince her you two can be in a relationship. People are going to be angry and hurt, there's no way to avoid it. If you're not going to be one hundred and fifty percent in, leave it alone. I don't want her to get hurt any more than she already is."

"Neither do I."

"But you do know there is no possible way for her not to be hurt? You just admitted to me there's a high probability this child could be yours. You do plan to tell Cat about this revelation you've had? I'm not going to lie to her for you."

"I'm not asking you to lie for me. You know I wouldn't do that."

"I was hoping this baby was someone else's."

"So was I. We took the paternity test today."

"You did?"

"Yep. The results are going to be ready in a little over a week. I'll know for sure—"

"If you are the daddy!" I look at her like, for real? "Sorry, I've always wanted to say that and when would be a more appropriate time to say it than now. Continue please. You were saying…"

"I was saying, I'll know if I'm the daddy, as you, Maury, and Cat would say."

She tries to hide a smile. "That's my girl, see, great minds."

"Yeah. I'm going to give Cat the time she needs; that's why I haven't contacted her since she left my apartment. When the test results come back I'll tell her. There's still a chance I'm not the father."

"This is one test I hope you fail. I mean, if this is your child I'm going to love it no matter who its mother is. You know she hates me."

"As much as you hate her."

"I've tried being nice to the witch. She's nothing like Cat. Sometimes I don't know how they can be related. If this is your kid, she's not going to want me around it."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves; let's wait until the test comes back to see if I'm the father."

"Well, she couldn't keep me away even if she wanted to."

"I know that."

"How do you think Chris is going to react when he finds out Kate's pregnant with a baby that might be yours and you're going after his baby sister?"

"I think he's going to react the same way you think he's going to react."

"I hope not. If it is, someone's going to go to jail for murder."

"You might be right. If the tables were reversed, I would want to kill him."

"Let's hope it doesn't come to that. I would hate to see my beloved cousin and my future man at war with each other."

"Future man?"

"Yes, I said it and if I say it, then so shall it be."

"If that's what you want to believe, who am I to tell you differently."

"Yes, it is. I need to ask you something."

"What?"

"Is Chris seeing anyone?"

"Why don't you ask him yourself?"

"You know he won't tell me the truth. Besides, you're the only one who would know. You know how secretive he is about his personal life. At one time I was beginning to think he was gay."

"Chris is a lot of things, Ava, gay is not one of them." I crack a smile because I know for sure he's not.

"Well you never know these days. When you never see a man with a woman, he's well put together at all times, and he looks as good as he does… You start to wonder."

"Chris and I are similar in a lot of ways and you don't think I'm gay."

"Everyone knows you're not gay and if there was any doubt, the situation you have going on now would put those doubts to rest. You owe me for taking Chris home that night so you could be alone with Cat."

"He sees a lot of women." I have to put the emphasis on women. "He's not seeing anyone exclusively. He doesn't do relationships anymore. Be careful."

"Who says I'm looking for a relationship."

"Like I said, be careful for your own sake. Don't get your hopes up for something that won't happen."

"I won't. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."

"I know you can."

Thirty minutes later we hug and I walk her out. Before Cat came back, the last thing I thought about at night was my case load. Since she's been back the only thing I think about is her and being with her before I close my eyes. Tonight, the only things I can think about are the mistakes I've made. How those mistakes could make me a father and tear us apart before we even begin.

It's useless to regret what you've already done; regrets are a weak man's excuse for their shortcomings for not being able to step up and take what they want. I have few regrets in life. The biggest is not going after Cat when I had the chance and sleeping with her sister. You can't undo what's already been done. You have to move forward, step up and take what you want when the opportunity appoints itself. This is one opportunity I'm not letting pass me by; as slim as it is, I'm going to use it to my advantage.

I like winter; it's one of my favorite seasons. Not because my birthday is in December and on Christmas Day. It's everything about it. I love the lights everyone puts up all over the city; people are in a jolly mood. Christmas trees and decorations all around making everything look like one big shiny Christmas present wrapped up in a bow. Candy canes and Christmas carols all month long. It feels exciting and special, it brings everyone closer together. I love the warm feelings you get when all your friends and family are gathered around together. It's even better when it snows on Christmas Day, it makes it extra special like French vanilla ice cream on top of warm apple pie; it just looks so good it makes everything better. Who doesn't love a white Christmas?

That's one of my favorite movies—
White Christmas
. I used to watch that movie every year with Sophie and my mom. That's one thing me and my mother have in common as it's her favorite movie too. How ironic is it that her favorite part in the movie is when the two sisters sing the song "Sisters" together. She would sing along till the end; her favorite part was the end, "and lord help the sister that comes between me and my man!" Boy, if she only knew that song could be the theme song to my life right about now.

I walk across the street into the café where I'm having lunch with Chloe. I see her sitting in one of the booths lined up against the window talking to a guy leaning over the table. He has a muscular build like he could be the quarterback on a football team or something like that.  She sees me and waves me over to the table.

"Hi, Cat."

"Hi."

"Cat, this is Richard. Richard, this is Cat, the friend I told you I was waiting for."

Richard straightens up, turns to me and takes my hand. I can see why Chloe was smiling from ear to ear. He's so beautiful he almost takes my breath away; it's more of a masculine than feminine beauty. Talk about a Colgate smile. I can't help but smile back at him.

"I didn't believe her when she said she was waiting for a friend that's equally as beautiful as her."

"Thank you." Cute and charming. I move in to the seat across from Chloe and take my coat off and he turns back to Chloe.

"My apologies. You weren't trying to get rid of me."

"No, I wasn't."

"Do you accept my apology?"

"I don't know. Cat, what do you think, should I accept his apology for doubting me?"

I look at her and at him and shrug my shoulders. "I don't know. Why should my friend who has never told me a lie a day since I've known her accept your apology?" Chloe and I look at each other then turn and look at him, our hands folded on the table doublemint twin style waiting for his answer.

He looks at us up and down with a warm smile that reaches his eyes. He sits down in the booth next to me. "Excuse me, Cat, can I sit here?" He doesn't wait for me to answer. "I know you're going to say yes already. I can tell you like me and you think your friend and I look good together. For that reason alone she should accept my apology because I'm going to be her future husband and the father of her future kids with her caramel brown skin and my green eyes."

Chloe and I look at each other eyes wide open giving each other the look, the is-this-guy-serious look. He has to do better than this if he's going to get anywhere with Chloe. One, the guys she dates are usually more rugged. And as rugged as they are, they better have the money to finance her or be on their way to getting that money if they want to last past one date. As if he can read our minds he starts giving us a rundown of his résumé.

"I don't think I'm that much younger than you, I'm perfectly healthy, I'm a soon-to-be graduate with a 4.0 GPA majoring in computer engineering. I was raised by a single mother who taught me and my brother to respect women and treat them right. I've never spent a single night in jail or been arrested, my record is spotless. I'm on the rugby team and I'm also an RA at my school. So I'd like to know when I can pick you up, for the first date that's going to lead to our future epic great love story that we will one day be telling our kids about."

Smooth. Smooth. Smooth.

"If you have any doubts about anything that I have said you can always Google me and I will gladly introduce you to any and all of my friends and family to verify everything I've said. I wouldn't do that for just anyone, but I'm so intrigued and captivated by your friend's beauty, Cat. If she forgives me, we can have a beautiful future together."

I shake my head up and down at Chloe. I'd say yes. He has me hooked.

"Richard, I accept your apology. Give me your number. You can pick me up tomorrow at seven sharp. If you can't make it, date's off. I will be Googling you as soon as I leave here. If I see one thing I don't like you will never hear from me again. Everything you told me better check out."