In the Shadow of Shakespeare (33 page)

"What
say you?"  she said.

"Monstrous
beauty Lady.  You are a charmed mirror." The lad who played Katherine
bowed before her.

As
the words spilled from his mouth she began to have a vision.  A hall of
mirrors stood before her and she was reflected in each one as far as her eye
could see.  Dizzy, she placed her hand to her head.

"Lady?
Art though ill?"

She
shook her head as the heat crept up the back of her neck and to her face. 
"Nay.  Tired is all.  I've been riding hard."

Richard
Tarlton appeared at the top of the stair.  He did a complete somersault
before them and landed at their feet.  Jumping up he surveyed their faces.

"Hast
thou seen Master Marlowe?" he asked.

"Master
Marlowe is naught to be found."  She gave him a hard look, knowing he
was one of the privileged few who knew of the situation. 

Tarlton
placed his hands on his hips and like a snake about to strike made himself
larger.  "Lads!  Go to. There is naught here for nary of
you." 

"Nay,
perchance not.  But all of London is a buzz with the gossip of the lack of
our playmaker."  The lad who was Katherine nodded vigorously while
his companion surveyed his nails. 

Tarlton
frowned.  "Alice, I cannot perform the last scene and have asked
Hadeous to perform in my stead."

"A
lack of our playmaker and one clown does not bode us well."  She
said.

Aaron
rushed up the stairs, a mask of fear covering his face. "Lady, “ he said,
out of breath,  “It is not fortuitous for you to play today."

"Hadeus,
why dost thou talk in puzzles?" She turned from the mirror.

"'Tis
my part!"  The boy who was Katherine walked out on stage.  The
crowd whistled and cat called.

"All
will fall apart, Lady."

She
looked at him quizzically.  "I am to play this part, as you know
Hadeus.  Then give our Lord Admiral some monies.  The rest goes to
Kit.  I will meet him at Deptford before his ship is to sail to
France.  And then I go to Italy.  We will be together
then."  She fingered the beads around her neck.  "Shh.
Listen.  I am too go on stage in a moment."  She held her finger
to her lips. 

Hadeus
moved towards her.   "Lady, if ye are too stay in this time –
"

Alice
shrugged him off with her hand.  "I'm here on stage."

The
crowd roared as she appeared.  Standing in the middle of the stage she
looked down at the groundlings jeering at her, some faces smiling in awe. 
The dirt and filth of the floor rushed to her nose and she stifled an urge to
gag.  Staring straight ahead and eyeing the plumed hat of a rake in the
galley she became Bellamira: 

Since
this town was besieged, my gain grows cold

The
time has been, that but for one bare night

Pausing,
she looked again at the groundlings. 
What is my line? 
The
crowd began becoming hazy, swimming in her vision.  The stage began
rocking and she moved drunkenly as if on a ship.  Holding out her arms the
seasickness came over her in waves and she looked towards the horizon.  At
the back of the playhouse on the floor of the groundlings she saw the
dwarf.  He stood in the midst of a clearing that grew wider as she
watched. 

She
screamed as the clearing became nothing but his eyeball with all else in the
theatre reflected and swimming in it.  Drowning in the vision, she felt
herself fall into a large pool.  She thrashed in the water, watching as
Kit dropped through the darkness of its depths.

Alvis
blinked and all was black.

Chapter 41

Kit
watched the shadows on the wharf as he huddled in his cloak waiting for the
ship that would embark to Calais, France.  He tried to calm himself as
people hurried by on the docks in all manner of dress and occupation. 
Because it was early morning mainly merchants hurried by. A few drunken
stranglers emerged from the dark, staggering towards the brothels – what they
called home. 

 
He knew that assassins could come in any form, merchant or drunken sailor, it
didn't matter.  He had seen them all in his course of being an
intelligencer and there wasn't a soul who could fool him anymore. 
Intelligence and betrayals had given him a sixth sense into the heart of
humanity.

He
closed his eyes and thought of her.  Trying to conjure her on the
dock.  It wasn't so much for the money but the fact that he knew he
wouldn't see her for a long time. 

Waiting
there at the edge of the shadows he flinched at the sound of a shrill
whistle.  It was only a sailor, beckoning passengers to get on board.

Kit
touched his shoulder as he approached.  "How long 'till we
embark?"

"Now
my friend.  We leave."  Grinning, the red-haired sailor
approached the boarding plank and lightly ran lightly up it.

Kit
looked behind him, the shadows were growing thin and disappearing as a tired
sun rose in the English sky. 

He
closed his eyes again.  "Alice. Come."  He fervently
whispered her name again and again as a dying man would incite God to protect
him. 

"All
aboard!" 

The
sound jarred him and the heavy clanking of the men pulling up the boarding
plank proved that the ship was about to leave. 

Frantic,
he put his safety aside and screamed her name. 

Jumping
aboard the plank as it was rising, he ran onto the ship. The ship unfurled its
sails.  The docks became dark as they set out across the channel. 
Alice did not appear.

Chapter 42

The
sound of murmuring voices penetrated the veil of water as she swam to the top
and broke through.  The words "reaction formation," and
"psychosis" clearly percolated above the others.

Her
eyelids fluttered as she blinked away the last remnants of Alvis and they
fluttered into a corner of the theatre. 

"Ah,
she awakes!" 

Opening
her eyes she saw nothing but fuzzy shapes as she tried to focus.  Sunlight
poured through a window to her right.   She tried to sit up in bed
and found that her feet were stuck to the foot of the bed.  Raising
herself on her elbows, she opened her mouth but no words came out. 
Shadows began materializing and she saw a woman in white bent over her. 
The woman held her wrist.  She lay down again on the bed. 

"Alice." 

When
she heard the voice she turned.  "Kit." She whispered, at once
feeling safe and secure.  She would not be tortured now.  But then
vision materialized into Albert, someone from the future past who was a distant
memory.  She recoiled as he touched her hand.

The
nurse was scribbling something on a clipboard.  Moaning came from the
hallway and then an ear splitting scream. 

"I'll
be back in a minute, hon."  The nurse’s had a southern drawl and
honey her voice trailed after her after she got up and hurried into the
hallway, "Mr. Dempsey, your meds aren't due for another two hours. 
No, you get back to bed and I'll sit with you soon.  Your wife is dead,
hon."

The
words ‘dead hon’ had such a finality that Alice couldn't quite understand.

"Where
am I?"  she said.

He
looked pained.  "The psych ward."

"The
psych ward?"  Confused at first, she then began laughing, a small
hysterical laugh that reminded her of Baines.  She stopped laughing. 
"Why?"

He
took a deep breath, let it out and looked out the window, then back at
her.  "You don't remember anything?" 

Alice
wondered how much she should tell him.  They now thought she was a raving
lunatic.  "Nothing."

"We
found you unconscious by the side of the house.  It appeared you had hit
your head, but you just stared into space when you awoke.  We put you
through a battery of tests, but apparently there was no neurological
damage."

"So
you assumed that it was something else then?" 

"Alice,
when we came near you screamed and tried to run.  It was if you were
seeing something that we weren't…I –"

"Who
is
we
Albert?"

"Selina
and I of course."

She
stared straight ahead.  "Of course."

"You
don't understand Alice."

"Oh
I do understand Albert.  I am so completely manageable right now. 
You get to play the role you are so fond off."

"Alice,
if you were rational we could have a conversation but –"

A
small man appeared around the corner.  He was dressed in green and
carrying a tray.  She began screaming and it felt as if every nerve and
syntax in her body was on fire and ready to die.  There was a sharp pinch
in her arm as they held her down.  Everything turned black.

 ***

When
she awoke it was dark save for the light streaming out of the window onto her
bed.  She placed her hand in the pool of moonlight and was reminded of an
earlier time when things were ready to happen, when she was on the brink of
something.  Tears spilled down her cheeks.

"How
did this go so wrong," she whispered.  "Kit, where are you
now?"  She wiped her face with her hand, trying to make sense of it
all.

Perhaps
she was crazy.  She tried to piece together what had happened.  She
had bumped her head, yes, but she wound up in another place, in another
time.  Or experienced one, anyway.  She realized when she thought
about it she could remember everything.  There was not a single detail she
couldn't remember – from the silk of her dress at Scadbury manor, to the feel
of Kit's hand on her cheek.  She smiled, remembering the ink stained hand,
how gentle it was. 

But
try as she might, she could not remember what had directly happened before they
knocked her out with Thorazine.  The Thorazine had created an instant
stupor and then she had felt profoundly tired.  Yet now she felt refreshed
and her mind felt sharp.  But there was an acute sense of missing a block
of time.

A
shadow appeared in front of her door.  There was a glint of light on metal
and

she
made out two wheels as they turned in the light.  The wheels stopped.

"Hello? 
Who's there?"  Alice held her covers around her.

A
woman with long grey disheveled hair wheeled herself into the room.  She
had on a red hospital gown. 

"I've
never seen a red hospital gown."  said Alice.

"That's
because you haven't been here long enough." the woman snapped.

"I
don't see why you're so irritated with my response." 

"We're
in a mental hospital and you would expect some sort of….behavior.  Now
wouldn't you?"

"Yes."

"Good." 
The woman did a complete, neat three hundred and sixty degree circle in her
chair.  "You gave everyone quite a scare.  Screaming like
that."

"I
saw a dwarf."

"A
dwarf?"

"Yes. 
He came into my room."

The
woman smiled, clearly not put off by this response.  She twirled her long
hair around her finger.

"Hmm.
But why would you scream?  Was he evil?"

"I
don't know."

"Well,
you should find out." 

The
woman abruptly turned on her wheels and went out of the room leaving Alice to
wonder if she was dreaming.  She looked around for a clock and saw that it
was ticking.  Time was still present.

Chapter 43

The
room felt warm when she awoke and she wondered if it was summer.  Thoughts
and memories began to become clearer as time anchored itself in the present of
the twenty first century.  She could clearly see with her eyes closed the
figure of Alvis walk up the road leading to the house.  She remembered
that it was about to storm.  A horrible storm. Green and yellow had
slashed the sky.

She
did not open her eyes right away when she heard the voices.  They seemed
muffled at first but then the volume rose and the sound of the voices became
clear. 

"When
shall she be able to come home?" Albert said.

"I
don't know.  She may be in a psychotic state for a few days,
weeks…months.  I just don't know."  said Selina.

"But
have you seen this before.  A case like this?"

"No.
I haven't.  I've looked through the literature regarding psychosis, and
there is nothing that is comparable to this.  Usually people think they
are someone, there is this grandiose fantasy, you know?  Like thinking
you're Christ.  Usually Christ."

"Yes,
it's a wonder more people don't think they're Ghenghis Khan.  Or
Hitler." 

She
could sense Albert smiling.  She could
feel
it.  There was a
smugness about them that she abhorred.  They felt so confident in their
diagnosis that they had mapped the contours of her mind and that was all there
was to it.