Irreparable (Wounded Souls) (13 page)

I sit in the car for over an hour with my jaw clenched tightly. I have so much to say and don’t know how to even start. I know I shouldn’t be mad at Sam because she was trying to do something she thought was right. She says
she needed me as much as I needed her, but dammit I wasn’t ready for this. 

“Jameson, please don’t ignore me.”  She sighs and looks out the window and I look over
at her. She’s trying to play the victim? This makes me mad.

“Oh, no. NO ma’am, you do not get to play the victim here Samantha!” I growl and grip the steering wheel tighter. “You threw me to the damn lions!” I yell out, pissed beyond belief.

“If I would have told you, you wouldn’t have agreed to come,” s
he says softly and looks away. 

“EXACTLY!” I roar. I look down at my hands to find my knuckles white from the death grip on the
steering wheel. 

“Jameson, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” That’s all she says and then she gets quiet. She looks down at her hands and starts pulling at the skin around her nails.

“I was blindsided Samantha.
Those people you just brought me to see, they lost someone amazing!  I’m still here and I couldn’t save him!  You brought me to people who should hate me!” My
heart is pounding and my lungs ache as I try to breathe.
  I know I have to have veins popping
out on the side of my neck and I probably look like as red as a Solo cup at the moment, but I don’t care. Let my face match my mood because I am beyond pissed. I am infuriated.

“I was only trying to help you Jameson! You shut everyone out. You needed that whether you admit it or not! I am not going to apologize because it was best for you. I love you, Jameson.” She turns to me, her temper matching mine, and that’s when I realize she just wants me to be happy, healed, and whole.

I take the next exit and pull up on a deserted road, looking over at Sam.  “Are we done fighting?”
s
he asks softly. 

“Are you done doing things I am not ready for?” I ask and she smiles. 

“Yes.” That’s all it takes. I undo my seatbelt, grab the back of her head and pull her to me, none too
gently either.  This is primal
; I have to show her who’s in control. I have to show her that stuff like this cannot happen again.

She groans and pulls
my bottom lip into her mouth and bites down capturing my lip between her teeth. I reach down and undo the seatbelt she’s wearing and pull her closer to me, leaving no part of our chests untouched.  She takes the hint and slides over the console into my lap as I slide the seat back as far as I can. 

Our mouths are fighting each other for dominance, neither of us wanting the other to win; but that’s okay, I have all day. I slide my hands underneath her shirt and over her sexy stomach before cupping her tits in my hands. She groans and grinds against my already hard cock. I have to have her right now.

“Pants,” I pant and she puts her legs between mine. She
straightens her legs and starts to shimmy out of her pants.  We both bust out laughing when her ass hits the horn and
I swear its
loudest honk I have ever heard. 

“Shit,” she breathes, but I don’t give her time to think about it. I grab her and pull her lips to mine again as she straddles my thighs in the seat of the car.

This is definitely a first for me, I have never ever had sex in the car; but damn if it isn’t the hottest thing, especially with Sam. I unzip my pants and pull my cock out, and my eager Sam doesn’t wait. She slides down on it and drops down as hard as she can, moaning out, ”Hard Jameson.”

I meet her eyes and I see the lust in them. Good, because this is not about making love, this is about make up sex. I grab her hips and squeeze them guiding her up and down faster on my dick. She moans her approval and I hiss as her wet heat slides up and down on me. I meet her eyes with my own and then lick my thumb and reach down and start to circle her engorged clit with it. In two seconds she’s coming undone on my cock and as her muscles contract,
she takes me over the edge. 

I scream my approval and then she slumps over, her head resting against my shoulder. “I love you, Jameson.” I put my hands on her back and rub them up and down comforting her. We are going to be okay. I will forgive her for this.

“I love you, Sam.”

It’s been three days since I ran into two of the guys’ families.  How weird is it to run into two people whose lives you have impacted so much?  Pretty fucking weird, and then to know my mom is out on a date tonight with Mr. Roger.  Sam wants to know when I am going to see the guys and I just don’t have the answer yet.  I know she faced her fear, but maybe she is really a stronger person than I am. 

It’s hard for me to face that I will never see them again. Seeing those pieces of stone where they are resting in a final slumber is more than enough proof for me.   I just don’t know if I am ready for that.  Johnson has been around the place a lot more, and I am wondering if he is just going to move in.  Maybe I should just ask him if he wants to move in.  The only bad thing about that would be my sexcapades with Sam. They seem to be getting heavier as the days go on. 

I’m sitting on the couch with a beer in my hand when Sam walks in carrying an overnight bag and I can’t help but smile. 

“Hey babe.”  She comes over and kisses my lips and then turns to walk into the kitchen.  “I hear your mom is out with a pretty good looking man tonight.” She smiles from the kitchen counter and I chuckle.

“Well, I am not gay by any means but I’d say Mr. Roger sure is a good looking man. I’m glad that momma can finally be happy for once in her life. She deserves some happiness after everything she’s gone through.” I chug a bit of my beer and then get up off the couch and walk over to Sam.

I wrap my arms around her and lean in to kiss her neck. “Pippi and Johnson want to know if we wanna go to the movies and dinner tonight.”  She makes a face and I chuckle.

Anna is Mary-Beth’s friend, not mine, but I understand why Blake wants to go on a double date.  “I suppose we can. Just let me go get ready.” She turns in my arms and wraps her hands around my neck and kisses me. She slides her tongue into my mouth, taking control.  She pulls back and out of my arms quickly and struts to the bathroom to get changed.

I laugh and grab her bag and start to walk to the bedroom. Sam is so messy, and it used to drive me crazy. Hell, I am a marine and I have been drilled into keeping things spotless and in its place. Samantha on the other hand, well, she is quite the free spirit.  She doesn’t care where it lands as long as she can find it.  If I move something, she normally can’t find it, even if I move it to where it’s supposed to go.

I walk into the closet and pull out a pair of jeans; I still have yet to wear shorts in public.  Maybe one day I will embrace my disability, my weakness, but for today I am sticking to my dark colored jeans.  I slide them on over my black boxer briefs and then grab a red button up. I roll the sleeves to just below my elbows and then spray a little cologne and head to the living room to wait on Sam.

She comes out about fifteen minutes later wearing a black skirt that comes to about her mid thighs and I am tempted to not even go.   I can’t even look at what’s covering her upper half because I am so transfixed on the hemline of that skirt and those damn heels she has on her feet.  I shake my head a little and then continue my path up her body.  Holy hell, she really is trying to make me go into cardiac arrest.  The purple shirt she is wearing is loose fitting with the back cut out, and she’s paired that with a black tank top covering the rest.  “Sam, you cannot go out of the house like that. All the men will be staring at you,” I growl and she laughs.

“Well, the only man I want will have me attached to his arm.” She smiles and it actually reaches her eyes. For the first time, I notice that Sam might actually be healed.

“Damn right.” She leans in and kisses me as I say the words. She had better know she is mine and only mine.  I am the only man who needs to see her in anything less than this. 

She grabs her purse and we make our way to my Mustang.  I walk over to her door and open the door for her; that’s one good thing about living in a small town.  Mommas raised their boys to be gentlemen and treat a woman right. The downside is that everyone knows your business as well as you do. 

We get to the restaurant and Sam puts on her fake smile when she sees Anna and Johnson.

“Sam, you look so pretty. I really love your hair like that.”  Anna smiles and Sam blushes.

“Thanks Anna, you look nice too.” I smirk. I figured those claws would be reined in.  Anna really is a nice girl; I think it’s more Mary-Beth who is the bitch of the duo.

I walk over to Anna who actually does look nice tonight. She’s in a pair of red skinny jeans and a loose fitting sweater type top that’s hanging off her right shoulder, with a tank top underneath it.  “Hey Pippi, nice to see you finally got you a good guy to associate with.” I smirk and Johnson chuckles under his breath. 

“UGH! Jameson, you’re such an asshole. Quit calling me Pippi.” She punches me in the side and I let out an ‘oof.’ 

“Damn girl. Who taught you to punch like that?” She blushes and points at Blake.

“What? Dude, she needs to be able to defend herself.” He laughs and shrugs.

“Um, I agree but dude, that shit hurt.” I laugh and walk towards the door to open it for the girls.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We are sitting around enjoying a nice dinner and drinks. Sam and Anna are actually getting along a lot better than I thought they would. In all honesty though they could be good friends. If it weren’t for Mary-Beth being with me and Sam being my best friend when we first got together, I think they would have been friends too.

We are all sitting there eating our salad and talking when we hear something from the kitchen. It sounds like a pop and that’s all it takes. Johnson turns pale and hits the ground, ducking under the table for cover.   Oh shit, this isn’t good.  Anna looks at me, her eyes asking me; what the hell is going on. People are staring at us and this is not good. “It’s okay Anna. Just give him a minute. That crash probably triggered a bad memory for him. Sam, explain please.”  I go under the table with Blake and he is shaking.

“Johnson, look at me man,” I say as he rocks with his head in his hand.

“Can’t look up.” He shakes and covers his head again. 

“Blake, it was a dish or something crashing into the kitchen. We aren’t there anymore man; it isn’t anything bad.” I put my hand on his shoulder and he finally looks at me, tears rolling down his face.

“I’m such a fucking pussy.” He looks at me with haunted eyes, and I know exactly how he feels.

“No, you’re not. You are one of the strongest men I know and you will get through this.”  I grab his head and bump mine to his.  He wipes his eyes and looks at me. 

“She’s going to leave. We haven’t even stayed together because I was afraid I’d scare her with my dreams. Now, I have scared her by being scared of a fucking dish breaking in a kitchen.” He sighs and rubs his face.

“Anna isn’t Mary-Beth. She’s a lot tougher than this. If she cares she will stay.” I smile and he nods and we both get up from the table.

“I’ll be outside.” Johnson gets up and walks out the door. “I’m um.. I’m going to go after him.” Anna stands up and walks quickly after Blake.

“Well, that went well.” I smirk and Sam shakes her head.  It looks like we won’t be seeing a movie with them then.

“Sir, I was told to let you know that your meal has been paid for, and that they wish to say thank you for your service,” the waitress says as she comes to the table and smiles.

“What?” Sam and I both ask, and notice people are still staring at us.  Sam can see the wheels turning in my eyes and grabs my hand.

“Don’t you dare, Jameson.  People are already staring.” I smirk. If they want a show, I’ll give them one.

I stand up and smile. “Hello everyone! My name is PFC Jameson Carter. I want to say thank you to whoever paid for our meals. Also, thank you all for not making a big deal out of a man, who is living with visions of the hell he has lived through for you to sit here and enjoy your meal in peace.  Thank you for making him feel like an animal in a cage while he went through a flash back of his time in the war. I appreciate that. Have a great night.”

I start to walk out the door and Sam follows. Wouldn’t you know it, there is my mother standing at the door with a scowl on her face. Her damn right foot just is tapping away and she has her hands on her hips. Of course she’d come to the restaurant I go to for her date, and of course she’d hear that rant.

“Jameson Nathan! Outside right now!” Momma turns on her heels and walks outside.  “What the hell are you thinking Jameson?” She turns and looks me in the eyes. Of course she wouldn’t want someone marring the towns’ opinion of her.