Irreparable (Wounded Souls) (7 page)

We pull up into her driveway and she smiles at me. “Thanks for tonight Carter. It was fun.” She bites her lip and I’m done.  I reach over and pull her lip out of the cage she made with her teeth. 

“Don’t do that Sam. I can’t control myself if you do that.”  She blushes and I’ll be damned if she doesn’t do it again.

“Sam,” I growl and she blushes. Damn it! Why does she have to be so cute when she blushes?

“Sorry, habit,” she says and looks over at me. “I um, I had a good time tonight Jameson.  Thank you for tonight.”  She smiles and grabs her purse, but I stop her by grabbing her arm.  She goes rigid, and jerks her arm away. 

“Please don’t,” she whispers and then gets out of the car,  runs into the house and slams the door.

What in God’s name just happened? She was fine all night, and now she’s running from me? I swear, I have no clue what’s going on, but I will find out.

Putting the car in reverse, I back up and leave her house. I pull my phone out and text her.
Sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.
Fifteen minutes later, I pull into my driveway and still nothing from Sam.  Well hell. So much for today being my lucky day.

Two weeks has gone by since I last saw Sam. I text and get nothing. The only thing that even remotely calms me down is running.  Luckily for me, Sam gave me the means to do just that.  So here I am, in the park at eight o’clock on a Friday night running.  I feel like Forrest Gump, running just to run, running from nothing, running to nothing, just running to feel the burn of sucking oxygen into your lungs.  Running, so you feel something other than regret.

It seems like I have a lot to be regretful for. I regret ever leaving that day, leaving to go fight a war that I don’t even understand what we are really fighting for anymore. We got the bastard that planned 9/11. We aren’t there to protect their people, even though they need protecting, that’s for damn sure.  I have seen things no one should ever have to see.

I witnessed a child beaten, and a mother raped, all because the guy could do it. Well trust me, that guy can’t do it again.  I’ve witnessed children walking into a room with a bomb strapped to them and I’ve had to take them out to save the other people there.  It’s not an easy job but when you’re given a choice of life or death. You tell me what you’d do.  You’d pull that trigger too, even if the person getting the bullet is a nine year old boy.

So, I run, I run from my past. I wish I was running towards a future I knew, a future with a beautiful spunky blonde, with boobs to die for and lips that look amazing when she bites them.  I run until I can’t pull air into my lungs, until the white t-shirt I am wearing is soaked and see-through with sweat, and then I run a few more minutes, just because I can.

I stop under a light and I gasp for breath, my hands on my knees panting. I’m trying to slow down my breathing when I see a pair of heels under me. What the hell is a chick doing out here at night by herself?

“Here, idiot.” I groan when I hear Sam’s voice and smile at the water bottle that is thrown into my view.

“Thanks Sam,” I gasp and gulp the lukewarm water down. Damn, she even remembers I hate freezing cold water.  Can this girl get any more perfect?

“What in the hell are you thinking Jameson? Your legs are going to be killing you in the morning, your ass better take some Tylenol when you get home. Actually take it now,” she yells and starts digging through her big ass purse. What is it with women and these purses they pack around? Do they really have that much shit that they need to put in there? She shoves two pills in my hand and puts her hand on her hip waiting for me to take them.

“Sam, I am not a kid, and your name sure as hell isn’t Jennifer Carter.” I sigh and she glares so I take the pills and look at her. “Happy?”

“Very, and your ass better be glad it was me and not your momma who found you. She’d have ripped you a new one and sent you right back where you came from. I can just hear her saying, ‘I put you on this earth and I can take you from it,’” Sam says, huffing.  I bust out laughing at the tone she uses because I’ll be damned if that didn’t sound just like my mother.

“I just had a lot on my mind Sam. I’ll be fine, I happen to be a big boy,”  I smirk and she rolls her eyes.

“Jameson, I am just worried about you, okay?  You’re not Superman and your legs will be sore come tomorrow. You’re okay to run on those but not the running you just did. You need to remember that you’re not invincible.” She sighs and then I catch her staring at my chest through my shirt.

“Like what you see Sam?” I smirk and she pushes me with her hand, and that’s when I notice what she’s wearing. Holy shit do I like what I see! I have got to get out of here before she notices just how much.

“When did you get that?” she asks, noticing my tattoo that runs from my shoulder down to right above where my t-shirt ends. I did it that way so my mother wouldn’t see it, the whole ‘your body is a temple’ thing.  I wonder what she thinks of Sam abusing her temple. 

“Um, I got it a few years back, thinking of adding onto it. Maybe even getting the guys’ names tattooed on me.” I shrug and she smiles.

“I bet they would like that Jameson. Come on. I’ll walk you home.”  She kicks off her heels, and that’s when I realize I am in love. Holy hell. I love Samantha Blalock.

We walk in silence for about ten minutes and then Sam speaks up. “Sorry about that night. It’s just, I’ve been through hell Jameson and I know you have, too.  But I have been through something you could never imagine, and I don’t know how to tell you.”  She looks down at the ground. What could be so bad that she thinks she can’t tell me?

“Sam, nothing would ever make me think any less of you,” I say and I grab her pinky in mine, just like we used to do when we were kids..

“This might.” She sighs and looks at me tears in her eyes.

“How am I supposed to understand if you won’t tell me Sam?” I beg her to open up to me. “Can you just trust me to know that I am not going to run when you tell me something?” I ask quietly.

“I don’t know. You were always good at the whole running away thing,” she whispers as she walks.

Damn that hurt. That really fucking stings. I feel like I just got shot in the heart; the devastation in her voice as she says that kills me.  I’m done fighting it, and looks like it’s my lucky day because here she is biting that damn lip of hers again.

“Sam!!!” I growl out and she gasps, startled by my harsh tone.

“Wha…” She doesn’t even get to finish because I have her pushed up against the door and my lips are crashing down on those plump lips of hers.  Green apple Chap Stick never tasted so damn good.

Sam hesitates for just a second, but then she responds to me, her hands going up into my hair and pulling on me.  Damn, this girl is going to be the death of me. She lets out a moan and I take that as an invitation so I slide my tongue into her mouth as I put my key into the lock.  I push the door open and pick Sam up, grabbing her ass and using it as a handle to get her where I want her. I push her back up against the closed door inside my apartment and I groan as she grinds against my cock.  The only thing separating us is her pants and these damn running shorts, and God does she feel amazing.

I pull away from her and kiss her lips softly. “Sam, you’re the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, and I want you to be mine,” I say and she moans softly. I push my erection against her and she screams out.  Not the kind of scream I want to hear from a girl who was moaning in pleasure mere seconds ago.  She has gone rigid and has a sheer look of panic on her face. I don’t even think she sees me anymore.  Her eyes are lost, haunted.

“Please don’t, just let me go,” she cries out and I move away but I keep my hands on her arms, and that’s when I know. I know I’ve figured out Sam’s secret. Now I understand why my sweet innocent Sam died. 

“Sam, I’m not going to hurt you baby, I’m sorry. Come back to me,” I say and look her in the eyes. Finally she sees me, not the images in her head and she breaks down crying. She falls on the floor in a heap and I know my worst fear is confirmed. She looks just like the woman I saved in Afghanistan.  My beautiful sweet Samantha was raped. I swear Luke and Mase better have gotten the bastard that did this, because if they didn’t, I will.

Sam’s POV

How do you begin to tell someone why the light in your eyes is gone? How do you tell someone that you have loved your whole life why your trust in people has become non-existent? If you’re me, you don’t. You let it fester inside you; you ask God why it happened to you; and you wonder if there is even a God. If there is, why does he let things like this happen to people?  Innocent people, people who trust with all their hearts.

That was me at age eighteen - sweet, innocent Samantha Blalock.  I had just finished singing at Lou’s bar across town; a place I had sang at plenty of times and I frequented with my older brother Luke.  It was the night after I watched my best friend of fourteen years get in the car to go fight a war, one that in my mind I didn’t understand the point of. It’s stupid and it needs to be over; that’s my opinion.  So when the three guys came up to me in the parking lot, I didn’t think anything of it.  I wrong to not think anything of it.  I had seen them before in the bar plenty of times before tonight, but I didn’t know their names. I think one was Kyle. 

“Hey Sam, that was some good singing you did, right guys?” the tall blonde guy said and I just smiled.

“Thanks fella’s. It’s getting late and my brother is waiting for me at the IHOP around the corner, so I’ll see you later.”  I smile and start to get in the car when one of them grabs me and puts his hand over my mouth so I can’t scream.

“Oh sugar, you’re not going anywhere but with us,” he growls in my ear. Then I feel it, the gun in my back and I think
oh god I’m going to die tonight
. It’s all that I can think about and I know for a fact I won’t live. The guy throws me in the back seat of my car and the other two get in the front and drive away.

“Please let me go, don’t do this I’m begging you,” I cry out, but he just laughs. I get a good look at all three of them. If by some miracle I make it out of this, I will make sure they pay for this. 

I can smell the beer on their breaths and I pray that maybe they will crash the car before they can do what they are planning on doing to me. But again, that doesn’t work and I see us approaching the ridge above town. Once they’ve found a secluded place to stop, they drag me out of the car. One is holding me in a headlock as I hear and feel my leggings being ripped down the middle.  My thong goes with it and then I’m dragged to the hood of the car.  One of the guys is there with his pants down at his ankles.  He grabs me by my hair, pushes me onto my knees and shoves his dick down my throat.  I consider biting him, hard enough to take his dick with me, but then I remember the gun. I don’t want to die, even if dying is better than this. “That’s it bitch, suck my cock.”  I gag and scream out as I feel the one that ripped my clothes off penetrate me from behind. I cry from the pain; I cry for my innocence that’s just been taken.  I cry that I will never be able to give my husband this gift that was meant for him. 

“Oh shit dude, this bitch is tight,” I hear him say as tears stream down my face. I hear them all laughing.  “Dude she’s bleeding… Holy shit man! She’s a virgin!” cries out the one in the front and then he laughs. For two hours they each take turns raping me. For two hours I pray for death to come; it has to be better than what I’m experiencing.  For two long hours I pray. I pray to a God I don’t even know exists anymore.  If he did, then why would he let this happen to me?  What did I do to deserve this? Was I too trusting? Was I too nice?  I pray for help to come. I blink tears out of my eyes when I see it because it’s too good to be true. I see the headlights of a car coming around the curve.  The guys yell and start scattering, pulling their pants up and running down the ravine. But I have seen them and I will condemn them. I will not let them get away with what happened here. My innocence was stolen, and the light in my eyes is gone. There is a blaze burning in them now.