Jocelynn Drake - [Asylum Tales 02] (26 page)

“Chang warned me you were a smart boy,” the woman said, drawing my gaze back to her face. She took my hand again and held it over Squall. “Does that not feel real? You know, Gage, that there is more to this world than what our eyes show us. But if you need it, this is all real and just for you.”

I nodded, struggling to swallow past the lump that had grown in my throat. All the emotions that had left me were surging back, leaving me feeling raw and ragged.

Gaia squeezed my hand. “You don’t have to leave.”

“I can’t stay.” My voice was rough and choked, but I didn’t care. “If I leave, will I ever be able to return?”

She cocked her head to the side for a second as she stared at me. Her smile dimmed a little. “If you leave, you will have one more chance to return. But only one.” She released my hand and slid her arm around my back, starting to steer me away from the bed. “Come. Let’s get some lemonade before Holly adds too much sugar.”

I paused, looking back into the crib. I could feel a slight tearing in my chest as I tried to move away from the little boy with the blond curls. It was becoming harder to breathe and my heart was pounding as if I had run five miles. “Squall?”

Gaia gave a soft chuckle as she stepped in front of me. Her old, wrinkled hands came up and cupped my cheeks. It was only when her thumbs brushed aside tears that I realized that I was crying. “He’ll be waiting for you, I promise. He’ll wait.”

I gave a jerky nod. “Let’s get some lemonade,” I said, trying to smile.

Gaia led the way out of the nursery, but I paused at the crib and looked down at the sleeping baby, trying to memorize the feel of the little soul that, somehow, I knew would one day be my son.

21

WHEN I STEPPED
out of the old white farmhouse behind Gaia, we were faced with a giant, lush garden rather than the rolling field I had walked across minutes earlier. I stood at the bottom of the stairs, taking in the rich array of blooming flowers, the green trees with branches spread wide overhead, and the thick carpet of grass that looked soft underfoot. But as I stood there, soaking in the beauty, I knew that what I saw wasn’t real. It wasn’t there. Oh, I could see it, feel it, smell it, and taste it only because there was a part of my mind that needed to find a way to comprehend this strange place.

Gaia’s home was a place of energy and life. It was either the source of or a crossroads for all the living things of the world: plant, animal, and other. Gaia tried to keep life in balance, but it wasn’t the easiest of tasks with creatures eating away at the domains of nature and the Towers unbalancing everything with their magic. Yet despite it all, she had this place of perfect harmony and I didn’t want to leave.

The old woman placed her hand on my arm and I let her lead me around through the garden to where a small table and a pair of cushioned chairs had been set up under a copse of trees. As soon as Gaia was comfortably settled, Holly carried over a tray that she placed on the table before us. She flashed me a smile as she poured us glasses of lemonade and then wordlessly headed back in the direction of the house.

“Careful,” Gaia warned as I picked up my glass. “She tends to make overly sweet lemonade. I think she may have lived as a hummingbird for a time.”

I took a tentative sip to find that it was perfect, like everything in this place. “Who are these people that live here with you?” I asked as I put down the glass.

“Souls wander in every once in a while, looking for something that they couldn’t find in other lives they had.” Her voice was like the soothing murmur of a woodland stream. “They stay and I give them something to do. After a time, they find what they were looking for and they move on to something else. There are never more than seven here at any time, but usually fewer.”

“Are they all dead, then?”

She smiled at me as she folded her hands over her stomach. “Do they seem dead to you?” Before I could answer, she chuckled at me. “This is just a different place from where you live. Nothing more.”

I relaxed in my chair, stretching my legs out in front of me. From within the copse of trees, I could no longer tell what time of day it was. There were little shafts of light filtering between the leaves, casting the world in a medley of gold and shadow. “I’ve met everyone but the seventh so far.”

“That’s because there is no seventh at the moment.”

My gaze snapped back to her wrinkled face and I frowned. “Were you expecting me to become your seventh?”

She gave a little shrug, her smile never wavering. “Not at first, but you seemed to settle in while at the pond. I could see you aligning yourself to this world, and so much faster than the others that came before you. I would never have offered for you to stay if I didn’t think you would fit.”

“I can’t stay,” I said firmly, but there was no denying the cry of pain somewhere in my soul. I wanted to stay, but I had to go back to my life. I had to help Trixie and Bronx. I had to protect my brother. I had to stop the Towers from destroying everything. Gaia was offering me an escape, but the people I loved would be trapped if I accepted it.

“I know. Your love of your friends and family is a good thing to honor and cling to. This place is a temporary thing. They all go back eventually.”

I nodded, letting the pain in my chest ease a little as I sat in the quiet of the garden. There was something about Gaia’s manner that reminded me of my maternal grandmother, something in her eyes and the way she smiled knowingly at me, a wonderful mix of amusement and pride.

“Chang told me that you were coming because you needed my help with something,” she said, pulling my thoughts at last to the real reason for my presence in her domain. While my body and soul felt at peace, there was now a discordant note in my brain, as if it existed in two separate spaces: Gaia’s world and mine. “I’m sorry to say that I rarely visit your world and I try to avoid having any dealings with it. I probably won’t be able to help you.”

“I understand, but the elves are in danger and you’re the only person I can think of that will be able to help.”

Both white eyebrows raised and she sat up a little. “The elves? They’ve always been quite good at managing on their own.”

“Until the Ivory Towers became involved.”

For the first time, a dark scowl crossed her face, deepening the lines there. The breeze increased to a stiff wind and a couple large clouds rolled across the sky. “Curse those Towers and all those arrogant sots,” she complained. “They’ve spent centuries mucking up all my work. They take pleasure in tangling things up and leaving it for others to fix. I’ve seen two-year-olds exhibit more care with their toys than they do for the world they must inhabit.”

“Unfortunately, a witch from the Towers has made a great tangle of the elves,” I said with a sigh. “I’ve discovered that she cast a spell over all the elves that is slowly but surely destroying their ability to procreate year after year. I can’t undo the spell. To my knowledge, no witch or warlock can until it has run its course and all the elves are barren. I’m afraid that if we are forced to wait, we won’t be able to save the elves from extinction. Furthermore, if the queen of the Summer Court doesn’t have a child soon, there’s going to be a war, which will only expedite their extinction.”

A sympathetic look crossed her face as she looked at me. “Sometimes that is the way of things. Before you were born, creatures lived and died on that planet. Now not a one is left. Their time is over and they had to leave to make room for the rise of others.”

My heart slammed in my chest and I shifted to the edge of my seat, leaning closer to her. “Yes, I understand that, but this isn’t about natural selection or some Darwinian survival of the fittest. This is the work of one person who is destroying an entire race. It can’t be allowed to happen.”

“But that is exactly what it is,” she said with the same sad little smile. “It’s nothing more than one race encroaching on the territory of another. The Towers have found a way to eliminate their rivals for their space.”

“No!” Shoving out of my chair, I paced away from Gaia. My hands clenched my hair as I struggled to order my thoughts into a convincing argument that would sway her into action to stop this horrible event that she was so calmly accepting. The peace I had found here had completely slipped away. The feeling of balance that had soothed my soul was gone, so that I now felt like a small island being pounded by the waves of the ocean.

When I looked around, the garden looked a little less idyllic. The colors weren’t quite so bright and the air seemed a little less fragrant. But the world hadn’t changed; I had. I had fallen out of sync with it, and it hurt.

Pushing the feeling of loss down, I looked at Gaia. “It can’t be allowed to happen. The world needs the elves. With you away and maintaining a hands-off approach to my world, it threatens to fall completely out of balance. The elves help keep the energies there on an even keel. I don’t understand their magic, but the world . . . life is better when they are there.” I held my hands out to her, trying to persuade her, but it didn’t look as if my words were changing her mind. “It was all a mistake,” I whispered. “The witch . . . she’s sorry now.”

Gaia moved then, a little jerk of her head, so that she was staring at me through narrowed eyes. “You know who did this horrible thing?”

“Yes.” My hands dropped to my sides. “She’s a friend. A witch who’s a cat now. I found out what she did. She didn’t think . . . or rather didn’t care what the spell would do. She thought she was protecting the Towers, but she regrets her actions now.”

Mother Nature gave a little snort and crossed her arms over her chest with a frown. “Sorry? I’ve never heard of a witch or warlock that was ever sorry about anything, regardless of who was hurt.”

“I am.”

She seemed caught off guard by my comment. She knew I was from the Towers and that I was a warlock, but I think she had forgotten about my past. Her angry frown immediately melted into a look of sadness. I knelt before her and captured one of her hands in both of mine. “I’m sorry every time I make some stupid mistake with a potion that gets someone hurt. I’m sorry that my family was hurt by the fact that I was born a warlock. I’m sorry that my friends are in constant danger because they know me.”

Gaia squeezed my hands, then placed one of hers against my cheek. “Oh, Gage, you’re not one of them.”

“But I am and you know it,” I pressed, praying that I had something that might change her mind. “I am a warlock and I lived in the Towers. I am one of them, but I’m not like them. And I’m not the only one. Sofie, the witch who made this mess . . . she’s changed. She’s sorry. She lives with an elf now and she lives in horrible fear of how that elf will react when she discovers the truth. She loves that elf and doesn’t want to hurt her. She’s sorry, but she can’t fix this. You can.”

She stared at me for a long time, gazing deep into my eyes. I didn’t know if she was reading my mind to determine that I was telling the truth or if she was looking inside herself. I could easily imagine that she had spent a very long lifetime fighting to right the messes caused by the Towers and she had to be tired of what was becoming a futile act. I couldn’t blame her for wanting to step away from the world and remain closeted here, where peace seeped so deeply into your soul. But I needed her to act.

“Chang also warned me that you are a sneaky devil,” she said with a slight frown.

A sigh of relief burst from my chest and my shoulders slumped. She was going to help. On an impulse, I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her soft cheek. “Thank you.”

“Ah! Just a minute!” she said sharply as I pushed to my feet. She pointed a thin finger at me. “Even in this world, you can’t get something for nothing. If I help the elves, what will you give me in return?”

I was so excited that I nearly opened my mouth and said,
Anything!
but I caught myself at the last second. Unfortunately, I had a feeling that she heard that thought because her smile grew. But then, if she had been reading my mind, she knew that she had me. I would do anything to get Trixie safely back with her people. If I couldn’t stop the Towers, I needed some place for her to go that would be hidden, and the elves knew how to hide.

“It’s amazing what we do for love, isn’t it?” Gaia said, looking at me speculatively. “A little while ago, I said that you would have a second chance to come back here. Would you trade that for the elves? For your Trixie’s safety?”

The thought hurt, but I didn’t hesitate. “Yes, I’ll trade it.”

“Would you trade Squall for Trixie?”

My heart jerked in my chest and it felt as if my skin had become cold and clammy. I stumbled a step backward as if I could run from her question. “Trade him?” My voice was coarse like gravel. “Would . . . would he be safe and happy if he didn’t come to me?”

Gaia gave a little shrug, closely watching me. “The future is always an unknown thing. Maybe yes, maybe no.”

Thoughts collided with raging emotion until everything was simply a dark whirlpool sucking down into nothing. Trade Squall for Trixie? Just seconds ago I had thought I would trade anything, but now I couldn’t say the words. I had known him for only a few minutes as I held his fragile body in my arms, but I knew with every fiber of my being that he was
mine
. Yet, by the same token, I loved Trixie and she was mine as well. I needed her safe if I was to have a hope of staying sane. How could I trade one person for another?

I never saw her move, but Gaia was suddenly standing in front of me, her hand on my arm. There was a lump in my throat and I was struggling against the overwhelming fear that I had gotten so close to my goal and it was now slipping through my fingers. I was failing because I couldn’t let go of my son to save not only my girlfriend but all her people.

“Shhh,” she said softly. Peace started to ease back into my chest, slowing my heart and shrinking the lump in my throat. “Breathe easy, Gage. It was a trick question. You can’t trade one loved one for another. You end up destroying three lives and saving none.”

“I offer everything that I am and everything I have, but I can’t . . . can’t choose.” My voice was rough and a part of me was angry that I couldn’t control my emotions. There was something about this place. Everything was so raw and fresh here, more vibrant and alive, that emotions usually so easily under my control veered wildly out of my hands.

Gaia smiled brightly at me, looking as if tears were gathering in her own eyes. “You don’t have to. What you’ve offered me is enough. I’ll fix the elves’ procreation problem.”

My heart lurched and my body tensed. My emotions were a fucking roller coaster here and I was beginning to think that it was well past time for me to leave. “What do you mean? What’s the trade?”

“You gave me the truth. As painful as it was, pulled straight from your heart, you gave me the truth. It’s a very rare thing in the world and I highly value that gift. Thank you.”

I nodded jerkily, no longer trusting my voice. I was feeling wrung out under the weight of my relief.

Gaia stepped back, but she held both of my hands in hers. “Now, it’s getting late and I need to send you back. I will visit with Arianna tomorrow, I promise, and will see about setting things right for the elves. You warn that little witch that she needs to stop messing in my domain.”

“I will. She is sorry,” I said, giving her hands a squeeze. “Could you tell everyone I said good-bye?”

Gaia arched a mocking eyebrow at me. “Even Rocky?”

I smirked back at her, starting to feel a little more like my usual self. “Especially Rocky.”

“Of course.”

I drew in a deep breath, feeling my smirk slip from my mouth. “Hug Squall for me?”

“Every day and twice on Sunday.”

“Thank you . . . for everything.”