Jolt! (24 page)

Another key to eliminating distractions is
commitment
. Commitment keeps you focused on a worthy goal, and that process alone is a tremendous help in eliminating distractions. I've discovered that the greatest opening for a distraction is not being committed to something better.

When things at the office slow down, people invariably get into trouble. One man who destroyed his marriage by having an affair with his secretary told me, “I had worked with that secretary for years, and the thought of an affair never crossed my mind—until business slowed down. When I lost my focus on the company, I began to notice her in a different way. Suddenly I became involved in a romantic distraction that eventually shattered my marriage.”

Eyes wander when someone loses sight of a clearly defined goal.

Human resources executives tell me that the times when employees are mostly likely to be distracted by the Internet are during times when intensity is low—often between major projects, when things have slowed down at the office. During those times, companies lose billions in productivity from distracted and uncommitted employees.

I've seen organizations fall apart as employees lost their commitment to a vision and started getting distracted. It's amazing that in cases of office affairs, embezzling, cheating, or other problems, how often they start from a simple lack of commitment. Losing sight of a common vision opens the deadly door to distraction.

What are you committed to? A successful career? A strong family? A growing company? A better job? Raising great children? Stronger leadership? A specific project or task? Whatever it is, your commitment is a key to guarding against distraction.

How can you stay committed? First, make a public announcement. Put yourself on the spot. Write a letter to someone you respect, announce the project to your employees, or share your vision with a friend or coworker. The threat of embarrassment is a powerful tool to help keep you committed. Burn the trail behind you so you can't go back.

Spanish explorer Cortez, after arriving in the New World, took his crew off their great sailing ships and then set the ships on fire as the crew watched in horror. That single act sealed their commitment to explore the new territory and ensured they could never give in or go back. Having no alternative is a marvelous way of helping eliminate distractions.

I love painting myself into a corner. I've learned that there is something exhilarating about the adrenaline that flows as a deadline nears. Although I don't necessarily recommend this to others, I often wait until the last minute when there is no time and no alternative to finishing a project.

Nothing increases commitment like the threat of failure or the risk of embarrassment.

Attention is one of the most valuable modern resources. If we waste it on frivolous communication, we will have nothing left when we really need it.
—JOHN FREMAN,
THE TYRANY OF E-MAIL

Distractions—they drain your energy, blur your focus, and disrupt your momentum. Projects fail, companies collapse, and marriages are damaged because of the way distractions deplete resources and destroy relationships. When I reach the end of my time on the earth, I hope to look back on a life of significance and achievement, instead of an impotent life bled dry from the distraction of things that added nothing to the value of my existence.

Distractions drain and take away value. Focus adds value. Eliminate destructive distractions and prepare for a life of significance.

» JOLT #22
FAILURE IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS
Mistakes Are Just Part of the Process

You always pass failure on the way to success.
—MICKEY ROONEY, ACTOR

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.
—THOMAS A. EDISON, INVENTOR

W
e live in a culture of success. America celebrates winners and despises losers. We even call winners “stars.” Star athletes, movie stars, TV stars, all-stars. A star reporter recently called the winners of a state spelling bee the “stars of the written word.”

But anyone who has experienced success of any kind has also experienced failure. Real failure is the proving ground and training camp for success, and yet most people don't know how to learn from their mistakes. As motivational teacher Tony Robbins said, “Success truly is the result of good judgment. Good judgment is the result of experience, and experience is often the result of bad judgment!”

The greater the failure, the greater the opportunity to learn. But first we must realize the teaching potential of our mistakes and commit to an attitude of learning, growing, and changing from our failure.

I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.
—THOMAS A. EDISON

Whenever I fall short, I'm reminded of Thomas Edison, the inventor of the lightbulb, as well as many other inventions that have changed modern society. At only twenty years old, he set up his laboratory in Menlo Park, New Jersey, and became a full-time inventor. At any given time, he and his team were working on as many as forty different projects and applied for more than four hundred patents a year. His feverish work schedule and productivity caused the local citizens to dub him the “wizard of Menlo Park.”

But Edison wasn't always successful. He struggled with many of his inventions, but in spite of embarrassing failure after failure, he refused to give up. Edison was driven to succeed in spite of obstacles of all kinds. Often ridiculed for his perseverance, he attempted more than ten thousand experiments before he finally invented the incandescent lightbulb in 1879.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
—THOMAS A. EDISON, INVENTOR

We must stop labeling failure as negative. There are no real failures— only options. Some options work, and others don't.

In the journey of change, I've discovered that most people and organizations fail for one of four reasons: situations, emotions, motivation, or knowledge.

SITUATIONS

To avoid situations in which you might make mistakes may be the biggest mistake of all.
—PETER MCWILLIAMS, WRITER

Many people are trapped by dead-end situations they feel are impossible to change. An executive who's been forced into a meaningless job due to political maneuvering from a rival or laid off because of downsizing is a good example. Others are: a single mom carrying the burden of raising kids and making a living all by herself, a man or woman left devastated by an unfaithful spouse, and a retiree on a fixed income.

» THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF WAYS LEADERS, MANAGERS, AND OTHERS CAN FEEL THAT THEIR PARTICULAR SITUATION HAS TURNED INTO A PRISON.

In the 1980s, I worked with a client who was sponsoring a weekly national television program. I was asked to direct the program, and an excellent executive was named the producer. We spent six months developing the show—designing the set, hiring the crew, writing scripts, and promoting the program. The producer worked hard, and we were on track for a really exciting TV series. But about three weeks before the first broadcast, the client decided he wanted a relative to produce the program, so my friend was pulled from his producer's position and sent to manage the organization's regional office in another state.

He was trapped. It had nothing to do with his performance, and it wasn't even personal. Nepotism happens, and my friend was caught in its wake. But whatever the reason, he had to make a decision to leave the company or be trapped in a situation out of his control.

We will either find a way, or make one.
—HANNIBAL, CARTHAGINIAN GENERAL,
LEADER OF THE FAMOUS MARCH ACROSS THE ALPS

You may feel trapped by your financial situation. Perhaps you'd like to go back to college but just can't afford it. You might like to change jobs or positions but feel trapped by your salary. I know many executives who feel ensnared by their retirement program. They've spent so many years at the company that—even though fantastic opportunities are available elsewhere—they just don't want to take the chance of risking the loss of benefits.

You may feel trapped by a physical handicap. If you're in a wheelchair, hearing impaired, or are limited by any other physical situation, obviously you have a different set of challenges than others and have to deal with that state of affairs.

The secret to overcoming what I call “situational failure” is to divide your circumstances into two groups: situations you can change and situations you can't change. I believe nearly everything can be changed or at least approached in a different way, but sometimes they can't be changed
right now
. Certain things take time, and we have to consider that as we attempt any serious change.

Make up your lists. Start with the situations you can't change right now or ever: physical handicaps, financial situations, geographic locations, family issues, age, and so forth.

Then make a list of situations you
can
change: your job, schedule, location, education, skills, friends or associates, self-confidence, and so on.

What can and cannot change is different for every person, but knowing the difference between the items on each list is critical.

Some situations are real. They can't be changed, and no matter how much we dream, hope, and wish, we can't change those circumstances. So stop wasting your time. Focus on the situations you can change, and start from there.

Far too many people fail—and continue to fail—because they're trying to change a situation that simply can't be altered. Stop banging your head against a wall and start practicing realistic thinking. See immovable obstacles for what they are and concentrate your energy, time, and effort on another area. Ignore the things you can't change and start focusing on the situations you can, and the opportunities will begin to reveal themselves.

You can't wait for inspiration, you have to go after it with a club.
—JACK LONDON, NOVELIST

EMOTIONS

The second area where most people fail is emotions. Human beings are highly emotional creatures. We have extremely developed, finely tuned, complex emotions, and our ability to be excited, laugh, cry, feel depressed, and more, sometimes creates a turmoil of conflicted feelings inside us.

While emotions are a gauge for how we feel, we cannot effectively base decisions on emotions. Ask an Olympic athlete, a concert musician, a research scientist, a professional race car driver—anyone who has to perform at the top of his game—and you'll find that much of his time is spent overriding his emotions.

“I don't feel like working today.”

“I'm a little depressed.”

“I'm just not in the mood.”

“I just don't feel up to it.”

Let those emotions take charge of your life and you'll never accomplish anything at all.

» EMOTIONS DO PLAY AN IMPORTANT ROLE IN OUR LIVES. THE KEY IS NOT LETTING THEM CONTROL US.

On the other hand, listening to your emotions in order to get at the core of what's bothering you can help you turn them into very revealing indicators of your condition. For instance, let's look at a couple of the statements above once again.

I don't feel like working today
. Think about it for a moment.
Why
don't you feel like working? Did you stay up too late last night? Perhaps you need to change your schedule. Are you eating well? Perhaps you need to adjust your diet or food intake. Not motivated? Listen to a motivational program, read a good book, exercise, or spend some time with an encouraging friend.

I'm a little depressed
. Are you getting enough relaxation? Have you taken a vacation lately? Coaches and personal trainers tell me that our moods generally swing up after exercise, so perhaps you're not getting enough exercise . Get back into an exercise program, and get into shape. Are you intimidated about the big meeting? Perhaps you need to be better prepared and do a little more homework.

You simply cannot give your life over to your emotions. They will delay you, stop you, or create detours on your journey of change.

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
—ROMANS 7:15 NIV

One area worth mentioning is just how toxic certain emotions can be, particularly over the long haul. In his fascinating book
Deadly Emotions
, medical doctor and nutrition expert Don Colbert details how what you feel emotionally becomes how you feel physically. Research is showing stronger and stronger connections between our minds and bodies and how our emotions can create serious physical problems and difficulties. Dr. Colbert states, “If a person keeps stuffing toxic emotions year after year, the day
will
come when those buried emotions come pouring out” (31).

Emotions like anger, bitterness, hostility, resentment, self-hatred, anxiety, and more can lead to many health problems, such as hypertension, coronary artery disease, autoimmune disorders, arthritis, panic attacks, heart palpitations, and tension and migraine headaches. Dr. Colbert believes that about 20 percent of the general population have levels of hostility that are high enough to be dangerous to their health—that's one out of five people!

We've all seen executives who are almost always angry, upset, and stressed-out. I directed a music video a few years ago for a major record label in Los Angeles, and the producer from the studio's music video division was a man in his forties who never stopped screaming. When I met him, I was stunned. If he wasn't screaming at me, he was screaming at someone on his cell phone. I discovered it was impossible for him to do two things: talk in a normal voice and construct a sentence without a four-letter word. Every moment of every day, he was angry, upset, or stressed-out.