Killer Ute (2 page)

3

Dev and I are going on a holiday. Gran says it's fine, but how weird is that? School's about to start. I was even kind of looking forward to it too. Gran's been going on and on about how high school is different from primary school and how it would be a fresh start for me. Mei and I will go on the bus, finally one of those big kids we've always gawked at. Primary school was getting cramped: not enough room on the oval for both me and Shawn Houser. Though he's not as bad as he used to be before Dev came, now it's what I know he's thinking that annoys
me. I don't let on that Shawn still bothers me. Dev tells me
that the fight is in my own head. I don't know how Shawn Houser gets in there but he does.

Dev came up with this holiday idea at the breakfast table today. We only got back from Adelaide last night. I've barely been able to tell Gran about the court, though she's asked me how I feel about Scott. What can I say? If I tell her he spooks me, she'll worry all the more.

‘But we've only just come back,' I say, and I expect Gran to back me up but she doesn't. This is so weird. I have the youngest gran in town – she's the same age as Shawn Houser's mum – yet she usually worries as much as older grandmothers do. She's always stopping me from doing anything she thinks is dangerous, or ‘inappropriate', so why not now?

Dev throws a lopsided grin at me. ‘That wasn't a holiday, mate.' There are a few looks swinging in the air like monkeys between Gran and Dev. Gran has on her ‘Is it safe?' expression, but she doesn't argue. You could knock me down with a feather, as Grandad used to say. Something's going on.

‘It would be nice for you and Dev to have some quality time together.' She says this like there's a stick stuck in her throat but she's saying it all the same. What's she up to? I know she's mad about Dev like me, even puts her jeans on and goes for rides on his bike with him, but there was a time when I wasn't allowed to hang out with him at all. But once Gran got to know Dev, she realised what a great bloke he is. And after Dev saved me from Scott, she let him board with us. Having Dev around has been the best thing to happen to me.

Dev and Gran breathe out suddenly and Dev gives her a wink. They know something I don't and I'm stunned at how that makes me feel so left out. Dev clears the table as though the holiday is sorted and Gran goes to my room. ‘Come on, Joel. I'll help you pack.' She's never helped me pack before, but I push my suspicions under the rug for now. You can't toss up a holiday, especially not one with Dev on his Harley. Mei will be upset though; she's already got the books for school and covered them with contact. She even offered to do mine. I better get over there quick.

‘I'll be back in a minute, Gran,' I say and race out the back door. It slams shut and I only hear half of Gran's protest, ‘Joel, you can't go now—'

I find Mei on the beach: it's her favourite place to write and think. It's amazing that we get on so well. I don't write nor do I think if most of my teachers can be believed. They're wrong, of course: I do think. I just act before thinking twice. Once I was told to proofread my thoughts but it's hard to slow down long enough sometimes.

Mei asks me about the court first. I don't say much but I do tell her about Dev's holiday idea. I don't say how it feels like Dev and Gran are ganging up on me.

‘But Joel, why?' I expect Mei to be upset, angry even, but I don't count on tears. A few make her black eyes glisten; it makes me want to hug her but I don't. ‘Why would Dev take you on a holiday now? School starts on Tuesday.'

It's a good question, but one I can't answer.

‘Where will you be?'

That also pulls me up short. ‘We haven't spoken about that yet.'

Mei frowns. ‘How can you not know where you're going? My family plans our holidays for weeks.' Then she pauses. ‘Is anything wrong?'

‘Nah, don't think so. But Gran and Dev are up to something. I caught Dev winking at her and she's not having a panic attack about me going.'

Mei's face relaxes a bit. ‘Really?' She says it slow as if she's thinking.

‘What?' I say.

‘Well, you've had a hard time lately. I bet they want to do something nice for you. Take your mind off it.'

It would be just like Dev to think up something like that. Good old Mei. I feel better already.

‘How long will you be gone then?' The catch in her voice is back. ‘Maybe it's just for a few days?'

‘Maybe, but Gran had a whole heap of my clothes on the bed when I left. That reminds me, I'd better get back and help.' It's not the best way to say goodbye but I'm not sure what else to do.

‘Wait.' Mei pulls her new mobile out of her pocket and hands it to me.

‘You can't give me that. What will your mum say?'

‘I've got two. It was a deal Mum bought – ten dollars a month if you talk between them.'

‘But she'll want the second one to be for her or your dad.'

‘She won't mind. Besides, it's just a loan.' She smiles at me. ‘I mean, how long can you be away?' Putting it like that makes it sound not long at all. Surely we'll be less than a week. So what if I miss a few days of school? Hey, last year I would've been over the moon.

‘I'll text you first and then you'll have my number.' Mei takes it and shows me how to do everything. ‘I keep it on silent,' she says, ‘and it just vibrates in my pocket. It doesn't bother anyone that way.' That's good; Dev's not fond of mobile phones.

Mei puts it back in my hand. It's so small I hope I don't lose it.

‘Dad will be taking the trawler down the coast and I'll be helping him on it sometimes. So let me know where you are. Maybe I can visit if you're still there on the weekend.'

I smile. That sounds better. Mei doesn't usually say a lot – she's shy as – so I'm surprised when she steps forward and kisses me on the cheek. ‘See you soon.'

She gives me this look like she's going to miss me heaps. Then she runs off before I can kiss her back. I think of chasing after her. I kissed her once last year. She was scared of a storm, but it was night-time and it just seemed right. It's different in daylight on the beach in full view of all the tourists in the café and I just can't seem to move my feet.

When I arrive home, Gran's got my bag packed already. Even my toothbrush! ‘What's the rush?' I ask Gran, but she just stares at me as though she's seeing me for the first time. Didn't she hear what I said?

Dev hears me; he's coming in from his room. His bag is over his shoulder and he has his riding vest on. ‘Best we go now, mate. We can miss the traffic south.'

There go those looks flying over my head again, and I catch one of Gran's directed at Dev, then it swings to me. It's the same way Mei looked at me before she ran off. I'm stunned. Gran doesn't want us to go. Why doesn't she say? She's not one to keep quiet when something has to be said. She hasn't even mentioned my diet once. No Coke, no preservatives; usually she's like an MP3 on replay.

There's only one explanation: Mei must be right. Gran will miss us but she wants us to have a break. I almost say I don't need a holiday. Dev and I have spent heaps of time together: on the boat, winning a fishing competition, going windsurfing. Times like that are like holidays. That makes me think of what I'll miss about this place. ‘How long will we be gone? Are we going to another beach?'

Dev glances at Gran. ‘There's a beach nearby. I know of a guy who has a place down the South East – thought we'd go there.'

I stare at him. ‘The South East? But that's yonks away. It's almost Victoria.'

Dev shrugs. He doesn't usually do that. Actually, I can't remember seeing him this wound up. He's like a tyre with too much air – one prick and he'll pop.

‘Think of it as a mystery tour, mate.'

Gran says something at last: ‘Joel, you'll have a good time with Dev.' That's true. Then she says something truly weird: ‘Now don't ring me or send me any postcards. I just want to think of you having a good, safe time with Dev.'

I grin at the safe bit. Gran, true to form, can't resist getting that one in before I go. ‘Sure, Gran, you don't have to worry about me.' Her glance flickers to Dev again and then he puts his arms around her. She hugs him back like we're going to the South Pole.

Dev murmurs to Gran, ‘It'll be okay. Don't worry.'

I feel like asking why Gran's so worried. Is it just that I'll be away when schools starts? Or that I'll be riding so far on the Harley? That's when this idea of a holiday starts to grow on me, so I keep my mouth shut. Who cares why they're doing it. I used to be such a wet-nosed kid, getting hyper over every single thing. But I'm going to prove how mature I can be.

4

We're on the road and I forget about how weird this all is. We don't have music in our helmets but I can hear it anyway: road-riding music. The drums, bass, tuba – they're all in the growl of the engine. That's better than any band. Then there's the wind. On a warm summer day like this, the wind in your face feels like you're sailing. Dev cops most of it; I'm riding on the back with my arms around his waist. Right now there's nothing else: just me and Dev, that's all I need for now.

We stop at Port Wakefield for a drink; it's what we always do when we go for a ride south. Besides, Dev likes to stretch his legs. I wonder if his arms get tired spread out like that on the Harley's handlebars, but he says they don't. I can't wait until I'm tall enough to ride it on my own – I can't imagine Dev letting me though.

I drink my ginger beer and Dev's halfway through his Coke when he stops and looks at me. ‘You okay about yesterday?'

It sounds casual but Dev says things like that on purpose so I can say something if I want to or ignore it. I'm tempted to just nod but that wouldn't be the truth. I take another swig first. ‘It was pretty rough. Maybe I should have taken the video option, hey?'

Dev doesn't answer that, but instead asks a question of his own. ‘Do you feel safe, mate?'

It surprises me. I always feel safe with Dev. ‘Sure.'

‘If ever you don't, you tell me.'

The penny drops. ‘You mean because of what Scott said yesterday?' Dev nods. Scott's scary but deep down I know he can't get me; it was just a threat. ‘His arms aren't that long.' I grin. Then I remember the other lawyer making mincemeat out of me. ‘Too bad I didn't answer the questions properly.' That familiar feeling of letting someone down slithers over me.

‘You did fine, mate. Lawyers make things up sometimes to try and win, to get under your skin—' He says some more but a truck goes past and I miss it, but I get the general drift. Dev's looking like he could punch the lawyer. Yet Dev told me once there were innocent people in jail, so I guess that's why everyone gets their chance in court.

We don't stay long after that. The route's down through Adelaide, Murray Bridge and onto the highway south. It's going to take ages but I don't care any more. Midday we stop near the Coorong National Park, eat fish and chips and watch the birds fly over the wetlands for a while. The birds make me think of Mei. Ever since last Easter she's been drawing them in her diary. That was when we stayed on the island with the old sailmaker. The island's a bird sanctuary – there were thousands of birds. Mei loved it.

Dev and I share a private look. We both like the peacefulness of open spaces. Only he and I on the whole shore know what we're thinking, and that's what's so special about Dev, and why I never want to lose him. I guess the only way that would happen is if he went off and married someone. Someday he might want to do that, but I can dream that he'll stay, can't I? What about that hug he gave Gran? It would be perfect if they hitched up and he lived with us permanently. But that will never happen. Shawn Houser would say how stupid it is, your grandmother marrying your foster dad. Dev would be my step-grandad. I'd rather he was my real dad.

‘Come on, mate,' says Dev. ‘We'd better keep moving.' It would be relaxing to stay here awhile, maybe overnight, but Dev doesn't want to hang around much today. Guess it's because we have a long way to go.

5

It's dark by the time we reach this farm Dev told me about. He doesn't seem to know too much about it and we miss the gate the first time. A farm sounds kind of boring. If I can't get to the sea and drop in a line I'm sure I'll frizzle up like a landed fish.

Even though it's late, a man comes out as the engine dies. Dev's Harley is loud enough to wake the dead. The man looks about the same age as Dev, bit taller and heavier, but also supple, as though he could move fast. I know it's dark and there's only a porch light on but Dev says, ‘Max, is it?' Wouldn't he know?

‘Sure is, Dev. And this is Joel?' I'm still taking my helmet off, but I shake his hand. Then we're taken in for coffee and cake. The house is so old they still have an outdoor dunny. They use it too, though it does flush, Max says. Our place is old as well, but Gran made Grandad do up the bathroom before we moved into town from the farm. I guess in a way, this is not strange territory for me. But I don't know about Max. He looks serious and so does Dev, not like it's a holiday at all. I thought Dev must know him since we've come to his farm but they don't talk about old times. Maybe Max was a biker too. You'd think they'd mention it if they hadn't seen each other for ages.

I'm tired so I go to bed. My room's small but that's okay. The paint's peeling off near the bottom of the wall. Farmers don't have time to decorate, Grandad always said. I'm just settling in, trying to pull the blinds down on my mind when I feel the bed buzz. It gives me a fright at first and then I realise it's the phone under my pillow. Good old Mei.

hi. howz things? where r u?

It takes me a minute to work out what she's written. I grin. It's like the way I used to spell. I send one back.

near beachport i think

Quit thinking about going to sleep. This is fun and no one knows. It will be cool to keep this our secret.

u r so far away. do u like it there?

not sure its a bit weird

glad u r ok. c ya l8ter. mei

U 2.

I smile at that. U2 is Dev's favourite band. I put the phone under the pillow again so I can feel it buzz if she sends another message. I lie there thinking of Mei and what a good mate she is. There are so many things I'm not afraid to do, like riding a trail bike down Killer's Gully, or diving where there might be sharks. So why didn't I chase after Mei to kiss her before I left?