Killing Rachel (19 page)

Rose felt blank inside. As if she had no feelings at all.

‘So I let the others walk on and I went back towards them. The woman and man were at the rail looking out to sea. They had their backs to me so I pretended to be tying up my lace and I heard the man say,
Are you all right? Did you think that one of those girls was Rose
?’ Rachel went on breathlessly. ‘That’s when I knew. I mean you showed me enough pictures of your mother and, what with the man saying the name
Rose
, well, it just triggered the memory of those photos!’

Rose frowned.

‘My mother’s
dead
,’ she said, turning away, trying to end the conversation.

‘No! You said you were never sure. No one was really sure, you said that over and over and then last Saturday I saw her. Your mother. On the pier in Cromer. Don’t you see? That’s why she was looking closely at teenage girls. She was looking for you, Rose!’

Rachel was smiling, her eyes lit up with excitement. Rose could barely bring herself to speak. Her mouth was dry, her tongue grainy.

‘So why did you wait until now to tell me?’

Rachel shifted her position on the bench.

‘I wasn’t going to tell you at all. Because, of course, I didn’t want to upset you. But today I heard that you were leaving and I wanted you to know before you went. And the thing is, I know I shouldn’t have done it, but I waited around a while and I followed the couple. They walked right along the front of Cromer and then went into one of the apartments? Like holiday lets?’

‘You mean my mother was in Cromer on holiday?’ Rose said, incredulous.

‘I don’t know. I’m just telling you that she was there. I recognised her and I heard the man say
Did you think one of those girls was Rose?
Those two things together made me think I should tell you.’

Rose looked away from Rachel. Of all the lies Rachel could tell why would she choose this one? There were many ways to hurt Rose but this was like sticking a knife in Rose’s heart.

‘Well?’ Rachel said.

‘I don’t believe you.’

‘I’m not lying. I mean, I know I haven’t always told the complete truth in the past but I’m not lying about this!’

‘Leave me alone.’

‘I’m just trying to help you.’

‘Go away, Rachel.’

There was silence and Rose turned back. Rachel’s eyes were glistening with tears.

‘It’s true,’ she whispered.

‘Get out of my sight,’ Rose said and closed her eyes.

After a few moments she heard movement and footsteps and when she opened her eyes again Rachel was gone and it was just the sun beating down, scorching her skin. At that point Rose felt a flood of anguish, her chest contracting, her throat awash.

Her mother in Cromer, within arm’s reach, a whisper away.

How much she wished that was true.

Now it was two o’clock and there was no sign of Joshua. A bus had come and gone, some Mary Linton girls giggling and laughing as they got off and headed across the lane back towards school. The driver idled at the stop to see whether she wanted to get on. She shook her head and wondered what to do.

It wasn’t like Joshua to not turn up. Not without ringing her or sending an email. There was no signal here so she would have to walk back to the school building and see if she had an email from him. If not then she could find the number of the White Rose and ring it to see if Joshua was there. Most probably he’d mislaid his phone. That might be the entire reason for his lateness. During his travels to see the guy from the parish council he must have left it somewhere and at that very moment he was retracing his steps and looking for it. There was nothing else to do but to go back to school.

Back in the school reception she went over to the waiting area and got her laptop out. She waited for it to load up, then she looked up the number of the White Rose and rang it but she was told that he had checked out of his room after eleven.

Rose didn’t know what to do. She looked at the time. It was 2.35. She’d give Joshua until three and then she’d decide what to do.

At three she sent an email.

Josh, I don’t know why you’re late. I’m guessing you’ve lost your phone and are looking for it. I’m going to wait until 3.30, then I’m going to get a cab into Stiffkey and look for you. If we miss each other that’s where I’ll be. Rose xxxx

She waited until 3.30 and then phoned for a cab. A couple of girls she knew from Eliot House were passing by and she asked one of them to take her bag and laptop up to Martha Harewood’s rooms for safe keeping. She didn’t want to carry it round with her. She’d go to the White Rose and see what had happened to Joshua. Even though he had checked out he might still go back there. Maybe the car had broken down somewhere.

He would turn up, she was sure. Then they could pick up her stuff and drive back to London. She thought this over and over but inside there was a niggle of worry.

Joshua was so reliable. Where was he?

NINETEEN

The driver turned into the car park of the White Rose and Rose got out and paid him. She went straight into the pub. It was just after four o’clock but there were still people eating Sunday lunch. The bar was busy and the place was hot, the smell of cooked food strong, inviting. The barman was brusque when she asked about Joshua. He’d not seen him since he checked out. He pointed out a man sitting in the far corner of the bar. She was flustered but she went across and said who she was. It was Colin Crabtree, the man who Joshua had arranged to see. ‘He never turned up, my dear. Around twelve he said. I had my documents ready but he never came,’ he said.

She headed for the exit.

Outside it was getting dark, the sky charcoal grey. She walked away from the pub in the direction that they’d travelled in the car that morning. There were some lights on in houses but they were set back and beyond them just swathes of shadowy farmland. She’d been living in London for months now. She was used to constant noise and light and movement everywhere so the depth of quiet seemed unnatural. She had a horrible feeling inside. Joshua had dropped her off at the end of the school drive about half past ten. That gave him plenty of time to go back to the pub, get his stuff together and go and see the man from the parish council.

He checked out of the pub soon after eleven.

Where had he gone then?

She did not know what to do. The narrow road stretched away into the darkness. She walked on, keeping to the side. There was no traffic. When she passed the last village light the road ahead was almost black. She went on, carefully stopping once to stand flat up against the side of the road when the lights of a car showed. It lit up the hedgerow and the road and for a moment she could see everything. Then it was gone and it seemed darker than before. She walked slowly and reached the lane that had the sign for
Beach
.

Had he gone back there? Back to the cottage?

She would walk up to the beach car park. If there was no sign of his car then she would come back to the pub and decide what to do. She turned and felt a blast of cold air coming from the mudflats. The lane ahead was silent and she felt uneasy walking along it. There was light from the moon, though, and she could see the high hedges that cut the houses off from prying eyes. She made herself go briskly along it, looking from side to side, listening for any sounds of people or cars or stray animals. Up ahead she could see where the houses ended and the campsite began.

The car park came into view and she could see the Mini. She felt a spurt of relief. At last. She quickened her step. The mudflats beyond were vast and silent so that the car looked tiny, moored on the edge of a flat brown sea. She hoped more than anything that Joshua was sitting inside. Even though the lights were off and it looked abandoned she hoped that Joshua had somehow fallen asleep in it and that she could wake him up and they could laugh it off, pick her stuff up from school and head back to London.

But when she got to the car she could see that it was empty.

And locked.

She looked around, with some vague hope of seeing Joshua appear from the coastal path that they’d been on that morning, but there was nothing. The place was completely deserted, just her and the Mini.

The wind washed through her and she shivered.

There was only one place Joshua could have gone. Back to the cottage. She remembered him that morning opening the top padlock and saying,
If I had a crowbar I could get the other padlock off and look inside
. She had been offhand about the whole thing and had angered him so that he was quiet and offish on the drive back to Mary Linton. Had he been so upset about her dismissal of the cottage that he had gone back there in order to prove something to her? And to himself?

What could have happened to him? Was he hurt? Had he had some kind of accident? The thought of it made her chew anxiously at her lip.

She rubbed her hands together. Her gloves were back in her rucksack. She looked down the lane that led to the village, wondering whether to seek help. It would be a sensible thing to do. She glanced over at the coastal path that they’d used that morning. It was inky black and she didn’t have a torch. What should she do?

She should go back to the pub.

But if Joshua was hurt? Lying on the ground? Freezing cold? Hadn’t she wasted enough time already?

She walked towards the coastal path. She would go and find him. It was a ten- or fifteen-minute walk. She had her phone to call for the emergency services if needed. She shoved her hands far into her pockets and walked on. She looked up, grateful for the moonlight, and trod carefully along the rutted path, her eyes getting used to the dark. After a few moments she felt a little more confident. It wasn’t so bad. It wasn’t as wild as she had thought. It was just a path in the country in the early evening. She counted the steps, twenty, forty, sixty-six, a hundred and twenty.

She heard a noise up ahead. It was the sound of an engine starting. She stopped and listened. From somewhere in front she could hear a car. She had no idea how far away it was. She looked into the darkness as far ahead as she could. She strained her eyes to see if there was movement but all she could see were swathes of dark blue and grey punctuated by shapes of bushes or trees. If there was a car on the lane then she should see the lights no matter how far ahead it was.

But there were no lights – just the low rumble of the engine as it seemed to move closer. She had no reason to be scared of it and yet there was a pinprick of fear in her chest. She felt her shoulders rounding so that she was crouched instead of walking straight. It was ridiculous. She stood erect and tried to pull herself together. It was the dark that was spooking her. She forced herself on, one footstep after another. The car noise was coming from somewhere over to her left, towards the land not the mudflats. She expected to see it at any minute but the noise rumbled on as if it was twisting and turning.

It could be miles away. The place was so silent that any noise might sound as though it was close.

She came to the spot where they’d turned off towards the cottage and looked hard. The noise got louder. The car was coming from that direction, from somewhere near the cottage. She couldn’t see it yet but it was getting closer. She stepped behind a clump of bushes and waited. The sound came nearer and when she peeked out she could see the shape of it, silver grey, the moonlight glancing off it as it came forward.

Why did it have no lights on?

She stepped further back into the bushes. She felt the foliage prodding into her neck as she waited for the car to reach her and turn on to the coast path lane and back towards Stiffkey. She looked again and saw that the car was, in fact, an SUV. It went slowly, dipping up and down at the ruts in the path. Eventually it edged past her. She saw one man in the driving seat. That was all.

As soon as it was out of sight she went down the path towards the cottage. She kept to the side of the lane, stepping quietly, almost holding her breath.

Who was the man in the SUV? And why was he visiting the cottage on exactly the same weekend as she and Joshua? Had he seen Joshua at the cottage? Had someone else from the village seen Joshua and informed the owner? Did he think that Joshua was trespassing? Had he come to check on his property?

Rose straightened up because something had occurred to her. Had Joshua been at the cottage when the SUV had come along? Perhaps Joshua had hidden to keep out of the way of the owner and had to stay put until the owner left. Possibly that’s why he hadn’t picked her up but was stranded in some way, hiding from the man in the SUV. It didn’t really make much sense but it was an explanation of sorts.

She went carefully and slowly down the lane. When the lane opened out and she could see the shape of the cottage she began to feel anxious again.

She stopped in her tracks.

She could see a tiny light in the darkness.

It was at the side of the cottage and it only took her a moment to work out what it was. A lit cigarette. A man was standing smoking. He was side on and she could make out his shape but she couldn’t see his face. She stood very still, not wanting him to see her there. A few seconds later, he coughed and the cigarette was thrown away. She could see it burning on the ground.