Kindred (40 page)

I didn't know what to say to that. Getting turned on, on a daily basis, surely wasn't such a bad thing, was it? It wasn't like I hadn't realised what it would be like to be around Michel. Even without the feeding, it's an electric pot-pourri of heat and desire, lust and hunger. Why not throw that impossible closeness into the mix too? Oh boy.

Before I had chance to answer Michel added, “You would have to be aware that I would still feed when in a battle. Should I find myself in one against human or a shape shifter. It would be an impulse I could not ignore. It would be nothing other than a vampyre reflex, no other connotation than the means to an end. You understand?”

That, I could completely understand. That was a vampire through and through. To a certain extent, that's what the vampires did when I hunted them. They considered the hunt of a human and the feeding and sometimes killing of that human, a battle and once on that path, unable to stop themselves. Vampires suck blood. We all know it. It's what they are. They may feed for pleasure and sustenance in the modern day, but their basic nature is still so deeply rooted that not to feed when faced with an enemy was an impossibility. Somehow, I had no problem separating that type of feeding from what Michel does every evening to stay alive.

So, what did I want? Easy. I don't share what's mine. Michel knew the answer before I even opened my mouth, the wave of emotion so strong. He reached out and pulled me to him, kissing my neck, my jaw, my mouth.

“
How is it that you can simply melt me with an emotion,
ma douce?
You have captured my heart, do you know that? You hold it your hand. I am at your mercy.”

Then he simply pushed the tray of food off the bed and threw me on my back and suddenly, I had a very amorous vampire climbing up my body.

His kisses were so sweet, so warm, so simply delicious. But he didn't want this to get carried away, he wanted to prove to me he could control himself, that I didn't need to fear his desire for me would rule his actions, no matter when. The kisses slowed, his touch more languid, until he brought both of us back to just the warmth and a welcoming sense of safety.

However, Michel had not been joking when he said he did not want me out of his sight and when sunset came and duties called, his every move was with me in tow. Rather than carry out his meetings with members of his line in his office, as he usually would, he sat himself in the bar, in one of the private booths, but in a position where he could continue to watch me at one of the tables.

There was a jazz band playing tonight, entertaining the large crowd that had gathered at
Sensations
and the woman singing had a sultry, dusky voice, the music making me bob my foot up and down as it sat crossed over my leg. Whenever Michel was busy, Bruno would be at my side. Sitting himself down in a chair opposite me, having a drink and keeping up a string of jokes about the patrons, the new vampires to join the line and even the jazz band. I don't think I'd had a more enjoyable evening with someone other than Michel. Why had I not noticed just how normal Bruno could be?

The moment Michel had finished with a vampire, he was back, lavishing me with his attention, touching me with his hands. I wasn't opposed to reaching out and touching him either, the need to be close so strong. I have no idea whether the groupies were there, the young women who flock to his side when he's in the bar, as Michel's attention did not waver, it was only for me.

By early morning I was waning however, tired from a long day and the terrible injuries from the fight with Nero. Despite Michel having healed me, my body refused to believe it was so and wanted sleep. Michel noticed my head drooping, from where he was sitting with Jett in deep conversation and rose immediately to come to my side. He said something to Bruno, I didn't hear and led me to his chamber.

Once he had me settled in bed, I said, “You need to go back out there, I'll be fine, I just need some sleep.”

He smiled at me indulgently. “I will not be leaving your side,
ma douce
, today, or even tomorrow, the Bond requires us to be together. It is a desire that cannot be denied even if we wanted to. The establishment of a Bond is an important part of our joining. There is nowhere else I wish to be. I will however, conduct my business from in here.” He waved his hand over to a comfortable armchair and low table in the corner which had not been there earlier, a laptop already sitting out waiting for him. “No one will enter, I can communicate with my line, silently and from a distance.”

I yawned and just nodded, having no desire for him to leave me at all. “There is however one thing you could do for me,
ma belle
.”

I looked up at him questioningly.

“
I am hungry, would you mind?”

Suddenly I was awake.

He smiled and chuckled. “Oh dear, you will get used to it, Lucinda, it will become as much a part of you as it is me, please believe me.”

My eyes felt wide, my heart suddenly in my throat, my pulse beating at an altogether most alarming rate. Michel reached up and brushed his fingers against my throat, just over my pulse point.

“
You do not make it easy, do you?” he murmured.

I swallowed the lump which had suddenly formed in my throat. Michel lowered his head and sighed. “I can feed elsewhere, but it would require me leaving you, as I cannot believe
you would wish to watch.” He looked up at me. “Is that what you would prefer,
ma douce
?”

I didn't hesitate, just shook my head, not breaking eye contact at all.

“
As I thought, so I shall make this quick. Forgive me for the speed in which this happens, my dear, normally I would prefer to take my time and savour the moment,
especially with you
, but it might be best if we just - how do they say? - get this over with.”

I bit my lip, I couldn't help it, I just couldn't stop my response to this; pure terror but also a need so strong it ached. My mind was telling me to calm down, this is quite normal, a quite acceptable part of being joined to a vampire, but my inner monologue was shouting
get the fuck out of here!
I struggled to tell it to shut up.

Michel took my hand in his, turned it over and rubbed the wrist lightly, so softly with his thumb, right above the veins and arteries there. His voice was low and even. “I do not normally bother with the wrist, it is somewhat impersonal, but perhaps tonight it would be better.”

He slowly lifted my arm up to his mouth, his fangs sliding out and down in a swift, smooth and quick movement. He didn't pull his lips back exposing teeth, as so many vampires do when about to go in for a bite, his mouth remaining so full and lush, his eyes met mine. And then before I could help myself, I reached up and grabbed his shirt with one hand, surprising him enough to loosen his grip on my wrist and then used the now free hand to pull his head down towards my neck.

He groaned and I felt his fangs take hold above my pulse, his lips mould against my skin. His hands were gripping my shoulders, I could feel the warmth of his chest against my body, the firmness of his hip against my side. Then the slide of fang into flesh, creating a sense of sharp pain, which was instantly replaced with a sensation of acute ecstasy and an intimacy so pure it rocked my soul. My eyes closed, even as tears slipped out past my lids and down my cheeks and all I could hear was Michel's voice in my mind saying
mine, mine, mine, mine
.

He fed for no more than 30 seconds, but it felt like the world no longer existed. I was weightless, drifting on a cloud of euphoria, swaying gently in a breeze of exhilaration, floating softly on a wave of pure joy. He did not let it become more, I felt no heat rise within me, no tightening of muscles that could send me over the edge, but only the reassuring sense of beauty and safety and... home.

He pulled his fangs out slowly, licking the blood that had pooled at his mark, kissing my neck, stroking my hand, brushing his fingers through my hair.

“
Um.” I don't think I had ever heard Michel say
um
before.

I looked into his face searching for something there. He was looking down not making eye contact, his face flushed, his pulse racing, his breathing rapid. He swallowed and I watched his Adam's apple at the base of his throat, rise and fall.

Then deep amethyst and violet eyes met mine and he said a little huskily, “Extraordinary. I have never felt anything like that before in all my years.” And then his eyes lit up with the smile that had suddenly appeared on his beautiful face. “How is it that you continue to surprise me? I have lived a long time, Lucinda, it takes an awful lot to surprise me now, yet you,” he paused to lick his lips, “you amaze me, you bewilder me, you enthral me, on a daily basis.
Tu es la raison de mon existence, ma petite lumière.
”

Wow. What could I say? Thanks just seemed inadequate somehow, so I opted for a kiss instead. Soft and wet and with everything I couldn't put into words but hoped he would understand anyway.

By the time he pulled away from my embrace he was well and truly dishevelled. His eyes glinting with sparks of amethyst light. He just looked down at me, in what I can only call, awe. What was with this man? He seemed so much more human than he had ever appeared to me in the past.

We stared at each other for a moment and then I said, “I know I should be tired, but...”

He chuckled, that delightful deep rumble in his chest. “You need to sleep, Lucinda, would you allow me to help you,
ma douce
?”

I nodded and lowered my shields, letting his tingling touch wash over me, pulling me into a loving embrace and helping me drift off to the happy realm of sleep, with the knowledge I was safe and secure and home.

Just before I fell completely into that beautiful and familiar abyss, a thought appeared to me, I'd missed an appointment today.

Where had Nero been?

When I awoke, Michel was sleeping next to me, his arm and a leg over my body, his face nestled against my neck. He was warm and soft and for a moment I just didn't want to move, but stay there wrapped up in his embrace forever. I turned carefully, so as not to disturb him and just took my time watching him sleep, soaking him in.

You'd think a vampire would go into that stillness, that absolute preternatural calm, when they sleep. There's no reason for them to breathe, they don't need to, or to have a beating heart for that matter either. It's superfluous to their needs. I'm guessing the younger vampires don't keep up that pretence, instead letting their bodies go to that place, wherever it is, that allows them to rest during the day. But for the older vampires, it's so easy. They've spent centuries pretending, so they could fit in, move amongst the humans without detection. For a vampire like Michel, even making your heart beat and your lungs work when asleep, would be second nature.

His face was relaxed, in a look I hadn't seen on him before. He's always so controlled when in public, even with me. I get the feeling sometimes, that every emotion or reaction that crosses his face, is actually premeditated. Nothing Michel does is not planned, controlled, yet here he was with a softness to his features that made him seem just like a little boy. A beautiful little boy.

He would have been gorgeous as a child. I wondered then, what his life was like before he was changed. I realised I knew so little about him really, only his recent history here in New Zealand. I only knew he was originally from France, but where in France and what was his life like then? The enormity of what his age meant hit me like a blow to the stomach. Five hundred years old was a long time to live.

“
Are you going to watch me all day,
ma douce
?”

He hadn't opened his eyes, but he had a little smile on his face, lifting up the corners of his mouth. Figures he'd been faking the sleeping too.

“
How did you know?”

He opened his eyes then, so deeply blue and reached up to stroke a wayward few strands of my hair off my face.

“
I felt your emotions. I think I may be getting used to them a little, I am starting to look forward to them. It is fascinating how many different emotions you seem to feel all at once. You flick from one to the next like a little bird in a tree, hopping from branch to branch. Fascinating.”

“
You looked so peaceful sleeping there, so relaxed.”

“
I am. I have you with me.” He kissed my forehead, then my cheek. “Are you not at peace too?”

And here's the thing, I so was. Being with Michel fed my soul. I have always felt that returning to my parents' farm was where I charged my batteries best, being back with the lambs, feeling the wind come over the hills, the smell of the grass in the paddocks, the sound of the sheep in the fields. It had always been where I went to centre myself, to block out the craziness that had become my life when I moved to Auckland. But now, this sense of peace, of belonging, when I was with Michel, was so great and so, so very good. I could not imagine that returning to the farm would ever hold for me what it once did.

“
Yes. Yes I am.”