Knock Love Out (A Sensual New Adult Crossover Romance) (15 page)

His arms are hugging her. She …

Is crying?

I’m going to go back and hide in his room, but he spots my movement.

“She was just so moved by Mariah’s song.” he teases, the stupid stereo still playing
Hero
on loop.

Poppy pulls away from him, wiping her face.

“Sorry. I was never good at first impressions.”

“Yeah,” I nod, “me either.”

Because hello, nice to meet you the morning after I slept in your son’s bed. By the way, I’m currently married. And a lot closer to your age than his.

“Well, at least you have your clothes on. I haven’t been so lucky in the past.”

Hot cheeks. Oh, hot cheeks. Both ends. Dear Sky Wizard, help me.

“I don’t like cooking in the nude.”

Poppy smiles, a small laugh even. Cash grins, sliding into a chair along the table.

“It’s not so bad, actually,” Poppy counters.

So,
this
is where he gets it from.

“Pardon me while I vomit,” Cash flexes a newspaper, reading the cover story.

Poppy rolls her eyes. “Call it payback for all the times I have been a witness to naked bodies
I
never wanted to see.”

“I didn’t want to see some of them either, if we’re being honest.” Cash chuckles.

“Waking up to an ugly girl the morning after is the least of your worries when you’re taking them to bed drunk, darling-dear.”

“I’m not going to knock anyone up. Relax. Clean my kitchen and relish in your little fantasy world where I still live at home. Shit.”

I smile at her rattling his cage.

“You could get crabs, Warren.”

His face sours. “Why would you even
say
that? I don’t have and will
never
have crabs or any other nasty shit. Stop it.” He looks at me. “I don’t have crabs or any other nasty shit. She’s just messing with you.
Me
, indirectly.”

I nod. Poppy walks past him, messing his already messed up hair, before she reaches the sink.

“Oh,” I walk towards her, “I can do that. I mean, I made the mess.”

“Shh,” Cash looks at his paper, “that’s Poppy’s Happy Place. She’s pretending I’m five, sitting here drinking chocolate milk.”

“
Three
and you were walking around our backyard in a cowboy hat and nothing else. You had the cutest baby butt cheeks.”

My hand goes over my mouth.

“
Had
,” he scoffs. “And stop thinking about me naked. It’s disturbing.”

“It’s not my fault you grew up so fast. You do
everything
too fast, honestly.”

His eyes look over the paper at me. “Not
everything
.”

Poppy hums, oblivious to how his eyes looked when he said it.

“I have to go,” I say quietly. He puts down the newspaper. “Nice meeting you.”

Poppy simply smiles over her shoulder, then goes back to washing the dishes. Cash gets up from his chair, walking towards me. We are hand-in-hand as her voice finds us.

“Don’t break my son’s heart, and I’ll be happy to say the same, Lilla.”

I look back to her, but she’s facing the sink. Cash tugs me towards the door, walking out into the hallway with me.

“Want me to go with you?” he offers, bringing my hands to his mouth.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, but thanks.”

He keeps my hands at his lips thoughtfully for a moment. A few soft kisses to my palm before he looks at me.

“Is he going to be home?”

“Maybe. I don’t know.”

“If he is, he’s gonna want you to cry. I mean, not the guy who married you—he doesn’t want that. The guy you dipped out on at the movie theater—he’s gonna be a real asshole. It’s just his hurt ego.
That
guy’s gonna want your head.”

I nod. He presses my hand to his lips again.

“Are you coming back tonight?”

“Do you want me to?”

“If
you
want to, Lilla.”

I step closer, tipping on my toes to brush his lips.

“Good answer, Honey-girl.”

He kisses my forehead. “Call me when you’re done.”

I step back. “Are you sure? I mean, if your family needs you, I understand.”

Cash shakes his head. “Poppy was just upset because of shit at the grocery store. She had a fight with my dad. They don’t fight very often so when it happens it’s like a … shock to her system, I guess. She’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” I repeat.

“Positive. Remember what I said, okay?” I nod, turning to walk down the hall. “Honey-girl?”

My head turns, pausing.

“Show me your ass cheek,” he grins.

I give him a roll of my eyes and the finger.

Cash laughs as I head down the hallway. I’m about to round the corner and find the elevator. His door clicks open and I spin around quickly.

“Cash.”

He pauses, hand on the door-knob, one foot inside of his apartment. Twisting to the side, I lift the hem of my dress, flashing him the red mark he left on my cheek.

“I’m gonna paint the other one, tonight.”

The fabric hangs back in place as I let go.

“Literally or just in theory?”

Cash’s expression brightens, a light lingering in the green of his eyes as he smiles.

“I guess you’ll find out when you come back to me.”

My feet start walking again.

“Honey-girl?”

My feet keep moving, I round the corner, press the button for the elevator.

“I’m not showing you again, Cash.” I sing, waiting for the doors to open.

“I love you.”

Taking a few steps back toward the hallway, I peek around the corner to return his words, but the door is already clicking closed. The elevator arrives and I step inside, leaning my back to the silver wall.

“Yeah, I love you, too.”

Chapter Eighteen

THE KITCHEN

He grabs my arm.

“You think some punk kid is gonna take care of you, Lilla? There’s a reason why they call affairs a fantasy—because that’s what it is. He probably can’t even take care of
himself
.”

“This isn’t about Cash.”

“Yet, you knew exactly who I was talking about.”

“Because he was at the movie theater. Please don’t do this. I just want my stuff. Let me go, please.”

“
Your
stuff,” he laughs darkly. “If you mean all the shit I have worked my fingers to the bone for, then yeah, I guess it’s
your
stuff.”

“Fine,” I snatch my arm away, “I’ll leave it all here. Will that make you happy?”

And here come those tears I was warned about.

“My wife not spreading her legs for another guy would make me happy. My wife being an honorable woman would make me happy. My wife being appreciative of everything I have given to her would make me happy.”

“Don’t even talk to me about being appreciative, Adam. Do not
even
—” I start to walk away, but he steps in front of me.

“No,
you
don’t even. I’m not the one who is wrong here. As crappy as I’ve felt over the last few years, I have never run to another woman to fix it. I have never been disloyal to you and at the end of every damn day I have always come home to
you
, Lil.

“Those two days you went missing—you were with that punk weren’t you? Weren’t you? Was that the first time you slept with him? You’re disgusting. You crawled into our bed and slept next to me and you are so damn disgusting, Lilla, I can hardly stand the sight of you. My mother was right—I never should have married King trash.”

“No,” I sniffle.

“
No
?”

“I didn’t sleep with him that night. You asked if I did—the answer is
no
. I didn’t. I went for a drive with him—but no, I didn’t sleep with him.”

“I’m sure it’s all semantics at this point.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Oh—well, in that case let us just forget all about it.”

“I’m not apologizing so you’ll forgive me. I don’t want to be in this marriage. I’m just trying to give you the courtesy of knowing the truth. You deserve that much.”

“How considerate of you, Lilla, but it won’t change anything. At the end of the day, you’re still just a slut who can’t keep her damn legs closed.”

He catches my hand before it smacks him. I’m tugged towards him. Too close.

“Does he do it like
this
?” Adam leans for my mouth, but I turn. He goes for my shirt, grabbing for my chest and I just want to disappear. “Does he whisper in your ear how he wants to fuck you, Lilla, and you’re so pretty and you buy that bullshit?”

He keeps grabbing at me, too strong to wiggle free. Fat tears stream down my cheeks.

“Adam, stop. Let me go.”

“There’s no way that kid can please you better than a grown man could, Lil. I know all your secrets. I know every inch of you.”

“No. Stop. Stop it!” I push at him and he let’s go, slamming his fists to the cabinets behind my head.

“Betraying
him
isn’t allowed, but for
me
it’s alright! You’re something else, that’s for sure!”

“Are you even
listening
to me! I said it isn’t about Cash. This marriage was over long before I ever knew Cash Valentine existed in this world.
This
is why our marriage doesn’t work. You think you know everything and pay no attention to what I am literally screaming at you!

“Yeah—I
like
it when he touches me. I fucking
love
it when he touches me. I love it when he looks at me and when he laughs because he listens to what I say and how he makes me feel. Like I
matter
. I only slept with him
once
. I almost puked the next day and I haven’t slept with him since then. I’m not a bad person, Adam. Cheating on you was not right. I’m sorry for that—but everything else—I’m not sorry for it.

“I was a good wife and I loved you as much as you would let me. But … it’s over for us. It’s been over for a long time.”

He nods, his chest rising and falling angrily.

“When he dumps you because the new shiny toy isn’t fun anymore, don’t come running back to me. I’m not going to save you or be waiting around for you to come to your senses. But mark my words—it
will
happen.

“
Then
what will you do, Lilla? You’re an out-of-work marketing director. Have you even read a newspaper lately? People aren’t hiring. Businesses are closing at a rapid pace. You haven’t held down a steady job in over
five
years. You have
no idea
what the real world is like—any more than that punk-kid you’re relying on.
Think
about it. How will you even pay for a place to live? You have nothing without me, Lilla.
Nothing
.”

***

The door is unlocked when I reach his apartment. I turn the knob and quietly step inside. Only the light from the loft is on. Place my bag on the floor and climb the stairs cautiously.

Cash has a large white canvas on the floor. No shirt. Denim jeans blotted with a multitude of colors. Bare feet. Palm to the floor. The other hand moves a brush along the canvas. Red.

I sit on the steps and watch him, unsure if he noticed my presence. He has music in his ears—I hear the muted melody from the buds turned up so loud.

I’m too far away from him. His art will have to share. I crawl my way across the paper-littered floor, resting at his side. He doesn’t jump, so I assume he knew I was watching. Casually he pulls one of the buds from his ears, placing it into mine to share.

His hand keeps working as the music plays.

“How’d it go, Lil?”

My mouth opens—the words are there. I can see them in my mind. I practiced them driving here. It was a solid plan. A wave of shakes rolls through my body, the realization of what took place thirty minutes ago finally coming to a front. Some sort of victim of a horrific accident. The aftershock. All of the anguish that I have pushed to the depths finding a place to surface after all of this time.

Their oxygen is my suffocation.

I can’t remember the last time I cried like this.

Felt something so powerfully crippling.

The movie theater sobs had nothing on this storm.

Cash pulls the buds from our ears and I hear myself. I hear my own sorrow and how close to a blubbering baby I am.

My mouth isn’t obeying any of our practiced speech. I was going to say
fine
. It was fine. He said have a nice life. He was happy. I was happy. I had a plan.

“He kept all my stuff. He told me I was disgusting and, yeah, I’m disgusting.”

Cash scoots away, and I think he is going to keep moving and never come back. Vanish, turning back into the type of magic he is.

A piece of paper is pulled from the pile beside him, slid towards me.

“She doesn’t look disgusting to me.” His hands slide soft as a feather over my wet face. “Neither does she.”

A girl is outlined in charcoal. Her face peaceful, eyes closed. This is the picture he drew of me. Naked. Yeah. I guess so.

“Who loves you, Lilla?”

“You.”

He nods, shrugging. “So who the fuck cares what Adam thinks.”

He turns off the light, leading me down the dark staircase, picking me up into his arms once we reach the floor.

The blanket on his bed smells fresh from the dryer as he rests me on top of it, pulling off his jeans before he reaches for my dress, tugging it over my head. His body is warm as he pulls me next to him, laying down to spoon behind me. His fingers unclasp my bra, draws the straps down my arms, and then tosses it to the floor.

I close my eyes and I bask in the warmth of his skin pressed against mine. His lips dip into my shoulder, teasingly dotting kisses as he whispers to my skin.

“How many stars do you think are in the sky?”

My head shakes. “I don’t think I could take a guess.”